Arachnophobia
by J.B. Writer
Summary: A Teen Titan, Spider Man crossover. 'Our pal' Larry decides to visit Jump City again. Complications occur sending Spidey, Venom, and Carnage instead. What will be the ramifications of this odd occurence? Three words... Watch out Titans!
1. All Tangled Up Pt 1

**The Dreaded Author's Note: **Hello my friends! Just got a few notes to get out of the way so you can read as quickly as possible okay?

This has no relation to my other 'Venom' exclusive fanfic.

Timeline is between the end of Season 2 (Aftershock pt. 2) and the beginning of Season 3 (Deception). That means Terra and Slade are 'seemingly' not alive. :( I know.

The Spider-Man universe I am using is a hybrid. Combining what I like about the Amazing (History of the Symbiotes), Ultimate (Age factor), Animated (Spider-Man's history) and Movie (No mechanical web shooters!) Universes.

Elaborating on ages. Peter Parker in the Ultimate comics is around 16 and Eddie Brock is around 18. Now Carnage is a bit tricky since 'Cassidy' has never been in the Ultimate series. So for all intents and purposes I will make him around his mid 20's. Trust me when I say that the ages for Brock and Cassidy won't matter too much. Read and find out why. ;)

**The Even More Dreaded Disclaimer:** Teen Titans are owned by D.C. Comics. Spider-Man, Venom, and Carnage are owned by Marvel Comics.

--

( - From the Whacky World of 'Dimension Four and Nine-Eights' - )

"Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! Thirty more seconds and I get to have another half hour of watching my favorite hero, Robin kick bad guy butt! YAY!"

This clearly over excited, pudgy looking entity was a prime example of a celebrity's worse nightmare. Whether it be a basketball superstar, a business mogul, an academy award winner, or a prestigious super hero - they all have the same common 'worst fear' people.

Of course I am speaking of the fear of the 'over obsessive fan'.

Oh yes kiddies, trouble definitely manifests itself in the most inane places that's for sure. Nosyarg Kcid, or simply Larry, was this certain nightmare's name. But like always, unknowingly being one of course. Yep, this was Robin the Boy Wonder's 'numbero uno' fan. Well, that is, if you could even call him a fan.

Actually you know what? No, no you couldn't.

This obsession was a bit more than just an intense feeling of admiration. Basic words cannot describe the haunting fascination this child had. And if the Robin banners, drinking cups, mimicking tunics, wall room papers, underwear (Gasp)…

(Five minutes later in Narrator's Time)

Bed sheets, T.V. sets, video games, and finally vitamin tablets shaped like 'Robins' weren't enough to clue you in? Then sadly the obsession will forever be out of your complete comprehension.

"It's TIME! It's TIME! It's TIME!"

Taking note from Larry's monotonous yelling, one easily could tell 'the T.V. show of all T.V. shows' was about to begin. The scene on the television screen fades into a dark warehouse and it is completely silent. Numerous camera angles of the all too quiet perimeter only added to the suspense and Larry was totally off his seat in anticipation, exposing the obsessed fan boy for what he truly was… er… a truly obsessed fan boy.

Suddenly a huge crash is heard and it is revealed that the concrete behemoth known as Cinderblock had been forced against his will through a large amount of crates. The monster groaned as it attempted to rise to its feet in a clear expose of anger. A heroic voice echoes from off camera.

_Robin: "Come on, give it up Cinderblock. We gotta large reinforced jail cell waiting just for you. It even has your name on it." _

The camera changes to a close up to a recognizable green boy adorned in purple and black, who like always, had a mischievous grin on his face.

_Beast Boy: "Hehe, yea! Now don't you feel special?"_

Oh yes, yet another stand off of good and evil. This was definitely an all too familiar scene in the friendly confines of this 'fictional' town called Jump City. A bad guy tries to stir up some trouble, and then a certain group of five gifted teenagers always comes to spoil the fun. As one could assume, it is simply a killjoy for the baddies of this fine town, just ask good ol' Cinderblock.

_Robin: "Alright Cinderblock, your time's up."_

Robin smirked confidently, spinning his signature steel bo-staff in a brilliant display of skill. After a couple of more twirls and flashes of dazzling martial arts background, he got into a low stance and taunted the large villain he was combating to get up with his gloved hand. The badly damaged concrete monster slowly complied and roared into the air as its ten foot tall figure reached its peak. The four teenagers behind their leader, who seemed equally as secure as Robin, stood like true heroes. Completely un-phased by the harsh sound waves erupting before them.

"Go Titans! Get Cinderblock! Yay!" Larry yelled bouncing up and down, pumping his fist.

_Beast Boy: "Dude, I think we just ticked him off even more Robin. Sweet!"_

_Cyborg: "Aw, what's the matter? Poor block head got his feelings hurt?"_

The screen shows BB and Cyborg pretending to cry, rubbing their eyes and frowning in an orgy of mockery.

"Hahahahaha!"

(Sighs) Larry is so silly.

The camera quickly cuts to a worried Starfire and an as usual bored looking Raven.

_Starfire: "Friends he does not look very happy. I believe we shou-"_

_Raven: "Take him out, right now." _

With that interruption from Raven, the camera pulls back to a shot of Cinderblock, who seemed to be actually smiling. Yeah sure it was an ugly smile, but never the less it was a smile.

_Beast Boy: "Um Starfire, he seems pretty 'happy' to me."_

Two loud crashes are then heard off camera. The screen then changes to a close up of each of the Titans with surprised looks in a split screen manner.

_Raven: "Uh, this is becoming one big 'happy' reunion isn't it?"_

The screen then cuts to the two beings that apparently caused the explosions. Revealing themselves to be none other than the toxic waste eating blob named 'Plasmus', and the electrical charged freak known as 'Overload'. The two chuckled with their very familiar distorted voices as a now seemingly confident Cinderblock joined beside them.

"No! Not all three of them again! They're in trouble!"

The camera cuts back to a mostly grinning Titan squad, with of course Raven being the minority.

_Robin: "Ready to take these three out again team?"_

_Beast Boy: "Dude are ya kidding? I'm always ready. Bring it!"_

_Cyborg: "Am I ready? Please, that's like asking if 'Booyah' is the most awesome word in the English dictionary. Of course I'm ready! A butt kicking from good ol' Cyborg is open 24/7."_

_Starfire: "Affirmative Robin! I am most prepared to vanquish these persistent Zardnarks!"_

_Raven: "Sure, and by the way I am pretty certain 'Booyah' isn't in the English dictionary."_

_Cyborg: "Uh… well, it is in mine."_

After an indifferent shrug from Raven, the Boy Wonder confidently pointed towards their three foes.

_Robin: "Alright then team, you know the drill… TITANS GO!"_

The Titans leapt into action and there was an animation pause with all five Titans frozen in battle mode. It was then that all too recognizable Teen Titan montage and theme song made their glitzy exposition.

(Guitars, Synths, and Drums Woohoo!)

_Puffi Ami Yumi: When there's trouble you know who to call, TEEN TITANS! From their tower they can see it all! TEEN TITANS! When there's evil on the attack! (Tack, tack) You can rest knowing they got your back! Cause when the world needs heroes on patrol, TEEN TITANS! GO!_

"BAM! WHAP! SMACK!"

Larry yelled the battle words, throwing pathetic excuses of punches and kicks to his apparently invisible baddies. He speedily got up from the couch letting the music blast away and leapt to his relatively small feet with narrow eyes. The doppelganger crouched into a martial arts stance (if you could call it that), of course to honor and mimic his all time favorite hero.

"Yay! Robin is going to kick their butt! This is way too good! I have to see this up close. I just have to!" Larry exclaimed clapping his hands together with the largest smile you would ever see. But after that moment of heavenly bliss, a flash of silence came into play.

"But Larry cannot! Larry has promised Robin not to ever… wait," a mischievous grin made its way onto the boy's face. "But what Robin won't know won't hurt Robin, right? Yea! I will just hide and watch from afar! Yes! Larry will just hide and peak!" The conversation with him self, which sounded like something he was definitely familiar with, turned into a battle of the conscience; of course with the temptation ultimately winning out.

_Puffi Ami Yumi: They got the bad guys on the run! They'll never stop till the job gets done! Cause when the world is losing all control! TEEN TITANS GO!_

The Titan theme montage was nearing its furious (1,2,3,4) finish and Larry quickly ran over to his television set with his signature glowing finger which was shining with the brightness of the heavens. All was going according to plan.

Well that was until – the disaster or all disasters struck.

Inadvertently leaving the remote control on the floor, the accident prone boy stepped on it and switched channels. But of course it didn't stop there! In a simultaneous motion, Larry tripped over the controller and sent him self hurling towards the screen, still unaware of the channel change. The boy's gloved finger pressed against the television set and in a split second the doppelganger disappeared. A new theme song and montage played on the T.V. set, just as well-known to many as the previous one.

T.V.: _Spider-man! Spider-man! Does whatever a spider can! Spins a web, any size! Catches thieves, just like flies! Look out! (Dunt! Dunt!) Here comes the Spider-man!_

_Is he strong? Listen, Bud! He's got radioactive blood. Can he swing from a thread? Take a look, overhead. Hey there, (Dunt! Dunt!) there goes the Spider-man!_

_In the chill of night, at the scene of the crime, like a streak of light, He arrives just in time!_

_Spider-man, Spider-man, friendly neighborhood Spider-man, Wealth and fame, he's ignored, Action is his reward_

_To him, life is a great big bang-up, wherever there's a hang-up, you'll find the Spider-man!_

**Teen Titans: Arachnophobia**

(- In a Truly a 'Marvel'ous Universe -)

The sheer beauty and splendor of the golden sun setting upon a warm day in _this_ New York City was truly something one would just marvel at. Yes people, New York City, the city of plenty. Oh, why is it called that you must be asking? Well it is very simple, it's because there's plenty to do, there's plenty to see, and there's definitely plenty to be happy about.

Okay, so some would just call it the good ol' NYC. And others would just call it the 'Big Apple'. Heck, a select few may even have enough love for the metropolitan to call it the greatest city in the world. And who could really blame them? This city and its citizens had everything. They got a skyline view to die for, they got the Yankees, they got Madison Square Garden, they got Central Park, they got the Empire State Building, they got Coney Island, and they unquestionably got the most flamboyant New Years Eve parties every year.

But in the same token don't be so easily fooled people! Just like all cities it isn't just peaches and cream. The crime rate is relatively high in some areas, it is horridly over crowded, cars are rendered completely useless, pollution is a definite problem, and of course one has to take into account they do have the Knicks. (You know it's true.)

Of course this is only a brief list of the good and the bad to one of the most breath taking cities in the entire world. And this list certainly does not only apply to the normal citizens of this particular city, but it also applies to its higher beings. Yes, this municipality, like many of this planet, was one filled of super heroes and super villains. Some well known, some barely even noticeable, and of course as only luck would have it; two of the more prominent super villains were about to grace us with their presences.

_**KABOOOOM! **_

Glass, steel, and concrete all tumbling down at great speeds from thirty stories high is never a sight any sane person would like to see, especially when the debris was raining down directly on them. Screams from below could be effortlessly heard from afar as the frantic 'civilian scramble' game had obviously begun. A few of the braver citizens stood relatively still and looked upwards to find out the exact cause of the explosion. Numerous long red 'whips' flailing wildly out of a large gap in a building was never a good sign.

Never.

"Oh dad, come out come out wherever you are!" The high pitched voice screeched above the New York City sky, ringing with much displeasure into the ears of many. The red figure, obviously responsible for the 'kaboom', stuck his ugly head out of the large hole he created scanning the area below with a sickening sense of joy.

"It's… it's… Ca- Ca-Carnage!" A civilian yelled as anyone, especially in this city, could easily distinguish this infamous symbiotic monster. Fact is, killing thousands upon thousands of innocents usually leaves a harsh memory to many of the one who executed the heinous acts. And this psycho really loved that fact.

The scurrying got 'a bit' more frenetic with the new piece of information and justly so. Two large eyes and rows of sharp teeth will do that to people obviously. The symbiote's large white pseudo eyes skimmed the quickly dispersing area as he sustained his signature maniacal laugh.

"Heh, hey Venom! Already down for the count? I'm disappointed! How can you deprive your favorite son of a little quality time with his own pops!"

Carnage let his tendrils thrash madly, purposely slashing at the building structure around him sending even more debris crashing down in a compacted heap on the streets below. His teeth suddenly snapped at the air as he began to sense an all too familiar presence. He spun a vicious look towards his right, finding the 'target' he had just forcibly launched out of the building moments ago.

"Deprive you 'son'? Now why in the hell would we want to do that? What do we look like? A bad parent?"

It was Venom.

The black symbiote let his infamous tongue flicker menacingly as he chuckled to himself. The pseudo eyed stare down brought both symbiotes to a sickening scowl.

"Dad, so you got back up!"

"Of course man! We wouldn't miss this! Beating the hell out of you is one of our greatest hobbies."

"Tsk tsk tsk dad, you should always choose a hobby that you're actually good at."

"Sorry, pottery and quilting weren't intense enough for us."

"Aw bummer, but hey! I hear 'dieing' is a fun hobby. Let's try that one out shall we?"

"Sounds fun enough."

With cynicism still in the air, Carnage launched his many razor sharp red tendrils towards Venom. The black fiend only grinned and quickly flipped backwards. Still clinging onto the side of the building with his planted hands, he evaded the attack.

In a swift counter, the black symbiote grabbed one of the retracting tendrils and violently pulled on it, sending Carnage's head slamming into the broken down wall he was peering out of. A moderately dazed Carnage began to reel back but Venom followed up by firing a stream of his infamous webbing, entangling his offspring's wrists together.

"We suggest you hold on to your symbiote 'offspring', because we're going for a ride!" Venom fired another gray line towards an adjacent building with his free hand and leapt off, sending Carnage 'along for the ride'. Like a large pendulum and using Carnage as the anchor, Venom whipped his body through the air gaining tremendous momentum. During the peak of his swing, the psychotic anti-hero released the stream of web connected to his younger counterpart, sending the crimson menace on his way.

"We shoot,"

Carnage screeched as he flew through the air and eventually hammered into a nearby window shattering the glass with greatest of ease.

"We score!"

Venom chuckled as he landed adjacent to the windowpane where his counter part had just blasted right through. Wall crawling his way over to the destruction he created, the black alien suited villain sat completely still with his tongue lightly swaying back and fourth. Venom waited relatively with great patience for his 'son' to get up but there was no movement or sound of any kind. That is until…

"AAAAAAAAAAAH!"

A young woman's scream suddenly erupted out of the broken window bringing Venom to an amused head tilt. Soon after, there was a high pitched 'horn dog' whistle that rectified into his ears.

"Wowzers, Carnage likes what he sees!"

Venom laughed hysterically letting his guard down and suddenly red tendrils erupted from the very concrete he was clinging onto. The brick wall shattered with no resistance and forced Venom to plunge downward in a rapid fall.

Carnage stuck his head out the window and looked down towards his tumbling foe. "Wow! Thanks dad! Now that was a sight for sore pseudo eyes!"

The crazy symbiote laughed as he leapt after his falling father. Venom only smirked confidently as he extended his fist towards a nearby building and fired a web line to slow his decent. The black arachnoid landed gracefully on the asphalt, in turn sending a few by standers running away screaming for their lives.

Carnage hit the floor just as methodically, of course letting that sharp toothed smile radiate from his face. The two stared at one another, crouched and seemingly ready to attack at any given moment.

"Just like old times." Carnage snickered. Venom only shrugged with his own cackling.

"Nostalgia is fun, oh yeah."

The two shared a mutual nod, preparing to lunge at each other but someone very familiar was about to spoil their fun.

"Ow!" The two yelled in unison, and for good reason too, as both of their over bitten jaws plainly felt like they had been dislocated. Of course this was compliments of two certain crimson covered feet that have had a history of doing such things. The two symbiotes shot off in the same direction and both crashed into the ground with harsh thuds. Venom and Carnage quickly shook their alien suit covered heads trying to regain some composure, as a few by standers began to cheer at their 'falling'. The symbiotes scowled at the group, sending them scurrying off like the others. A voice filled with sarcasm that could rival only a certain cynical and mystical 'Titan' echoed from above.

"You know I love it when you two are dealing with your little family problems and all. But seriously, can't you leave the city out of this? What did it ever do to you two?"

The two fallen symbiotes looked at one another as the owner of the voice mocked them. Venom returned his gaze where he felt it belonged and growled, narrowing his large white eyes in hatred.

"Well if it isn't our favorite little Spider-Dweeb. We've been expecting you."

Yes, the Amazing Spider-Man had officially arrived.

"Oh yeah. the one and only!" he winked. "And I thought you'd forget about me Venom. I'm touched."

Carnage sighed indifferently but quickly became very 'serious'. He looked towards his father in a concentrated gaze. Some would say overly concentrated even.

"Venom, I think this is a perfect time for a well placed… DUND! DUND! DUND!"

Venom ignored the more or less unusual reply as he snapped his jaws together towards Spider-Man

"We've been waiting for awhile Pete. We and Carnage have been beating the hell out of each other for at least a good thirty minutes now."

"Oh please, don't let me stop you guys. I'm just here to watch. This sure beats the WWE any day."

Venom snickered. "Hah, you should've stayed at home Parker. Unless you were planning on getting your head splattered against the street curb any time soon! If ya smell what the 'Brock' is cookin'!"

"Wow dad! That was a good one!" Carnage pointed mockingly at Spider-Man, "Oh Parker just got served!"

Spider-man nodded slowly. "Actually I'll admit it, that wasn't too bad at all."

Venom absorbed the compliments like a complete ham. "Thank you, thank you, thank you! Remember to tip your waitresses on the way out, and we recommend trying the deep fried brains. It is to die for!" he then bowed towards our crimson hero only to return to a tilted gaze.

"Tardiness is a bad habit Pete. What was it now? Auntie May making you do the dishes again?"

Spider-Man shrugged. "I know, sorry. I just had a few pizzas to deliver, a history test to make up, a few photographs to take. You know a little something about doing that right Brock-o?"

Venom angrily snarled at the comment but the masked vigilante wasn't through.

"By the way, you symbiotes have way too much time on your claws." Spidey mused. "But hold up! How'd you know I was doing the dishes?"

Venom only clenched his clawed fist at his arch nemesis' always witty cynicism.

"Pizza!" Carnage smiled. "Hey Spider-Nerd! Why don't you be a good little delivery boy and go fetch me some? Remember, I want everything on it except for those God awful anchovies! Stinks up the breath,"

Spider-Man laughed. "Stinks up the breath? First off I don't think your breath could get any worse. And call me crazy, but doesn't eating brains have the same effect?"

Carnage gave an over exaggerated scoff towards his color matching foe. "Are you kidding? Brains are better than Altoid mints dude! Get with 'ze' times! Toss that bottle of Listerine out the window and go get yourself a brain to consume in the morning!"

Spidey suddenly pulled out a pen and a piece paper. He began to write things down. "Okay note to self… buy brains at supermarket. Oh wait does it have to be human brains? I mean I am a first timer and all."

Carnage and Venom sweat dropped.

"Funny Parker, we do hope you're still in the joking mood after we're done with you." Venom threatened. "It's hard to crack jokes when you're decapitated by the way."

"Yea nerd boy! Ready to die?"

Spider-Man scratched his masked head puzzlingly. "Wait a sec, you two are teammates now? Hey! What happened to all that 'We hate you offspring!'? And 'Die dad! Die!' stuff?"

"Hah! Me and dad have worked out the kinks in our rickety relationship, you could say we've been 'Oprah'd'. Didn't ya catch it on T.V.?"

"Gosh darn! Was it the one called 'Ugly Symbiote Fathers and Their Even Uglier Symbiote Sons'? Because I really wanted to catch that one! But that Tivo is expensive ya know."

Carnage only nodded in teasing agreement. "Right on! And after hanging out with my dear ol' dad, I've come to realize he's not that bad of a guy after all! Check this! We've been spending the whole week having quality father and son bonding time. We've been playing football, eattin' hot dogs, canoeing, playing chess, tormenting innocents, beating the heck out of one another, ya know! The usual!"

"Fun," Spider-Man muttered as he tilted his head in an overly curious fashion. Venom cracked his knuckles.

"That's right web head. We've finally come to the realization that he isn't such a thorn in our side. Of course he has a few screws loose here and there, and he is a poor excuse for a symbiote, and his logic is more or less comparable to a toddler, and-"

"Alright, I think he gets the point." Carnage growled. Spider-Man shot both of his symbiotic foes a look of confusion and worry behind his mask. _Okay, this is a surprise. _

"Bottom line, we've found some common ground." Venom grinned. "Of course you know what that is don't cha Parker?"

"Um let's see. You both hate me, uh you both want to kill me, and um you both wish the fiery pits of hell to rise from under and engulf me?"

The two symbiotes looked at one another with a 'false' sense of awe. Venom laughed as he spoke. "Well we were just going to say we both love a game of miniature golf on Tuesday evenings, but yours is even better!"

Spider-Man shrugged at the extremely harsh statement that he himself stated. _Well don't I feel special._

There was a pause as the crimson adoring hero sighed. "I really don't know what to say really guys, uh, congrats?"

The symbiotes laughed.

"Gee thanks. And sorry to say this because we're having such a great time, but you just fell for our trap hook line and sinker. We've lured you out and now we're gonna play an old favorite symbiote game called 'Squash that Big Mouthed Spider.'"

"Alright! This is even better than 'Guess Whose Brain That Is!'" Carnage yelled in approval.

Spider-Man groaned from within. _Oh great, one of them is already enough of a pain. Now I gotta take both of them at once? My life totally rules._

"Any last words?" Venom asked as he cracked his neck with a violent twitch. Spider-Man only stayed silent behind his bug-like mask. His eyes enlarged and suddenly he exploded.

"Whoa, I got it!"

Awkward silence.

"'Whoa, I got it'?" Carnage paused. "Those are your last words! " he scowled, "Jeez, you really are freakin' lame!"

Spider-Man, in a surprising move to say the least, took a whiff of his hands. He then pointed at Venom, who in turn enlarged his right pseudo eye.

"It's the soap! My hands smell like lemon scented soap! That's how you knew I was doing the dishes. Whoa! You almost made me believe you were psychic Venom, you trickster you!"

Venom and Carnage gave mutual 'uuh's only to scowl soon later.

"Seriously I've had enough of this bullshit V. And I think you are too, so if ya don't mind," Carnage extended his arm towards Spider-Man. "It's killing time!"

Carnage fired a spear-like tendril towards the light post Spider-Man was hunched on. The red and blue adorning hero, using his amazing reflexes and spider sense, shot out his signature stream of webbing to leap off of the falling object. Carnage nodded his head with a killer's sense of pleasure as he then sent a barrage of sharp darts towards Spider-Man, narrowly missing by inches.

_Oh boy, Spidey you better think, and think fast_… _no,_ _REAL FAST!_ The masked vigilante quickly fired off another web line to flee away from the two stronger fighters. But even as swift as Spider-Man was, it was apparent Venom was a bit quicker as the symbiote's own brand of webbing tied around the Spidey's foot. Pretty soon Spider-Man was grounded and fully entwined with the thick gray strands, wrapped like a gift for the taking.

_That's thinkin' fast Spidey. You're too awesome you know that?_

"Get over here!" With a statement that would make 'Scorpion' (Mortal Kombat!) proud, Venom quickly pulled and Spider-Man was in his clawed grasp. The two crevasse filled white eyes stared menacingly. "Hey Parker. It's just you and us. No Daredevil, no Fantastic Four, no Iron Man, and oh yeah! No big horrible noises to save you now."

"Where's Ashley Simpson when you actually need her?" Spider-Man muttered as he started to struggle to no avail. Venom shot a look over towards Carnage.

"It's a good day for a little baseball eh Carnage?" Venom chuckled playfully waving around his web captured 'gift' like a rag doll. Carnage nodded profusely like a child in a toy store as he held a light post that he had forcibly just ripped from of the ground. The crimson symbiote dug his feet into the asphalt and brought the light post across his back shoulder, vintage 'Babe Ruth'. He then snickered with a look of confidence.

"Batter up!"

_Oh man. _The struggling picked up. "Guys, guys, guys can't we talk about this?"

The two symbiotes looked at each other and then shot a glance back at the tied up hero. They both yelled with their infamous warped voices in perfect unison.

"Nah!"

( - New York City Southern Bank - )

"_COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP! WE'VE GOT THE PLACE SURROUNDED!"_

The sound of an amplified voice through a megaphone is anything but unfamiliar to a villain, especially ones with the experience these three hooligans had under their belts.

"_I REPEAT COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!"_

As on cue the main door to the bank exploded compliments of a large Rhinoceros horn. As the smoke cleared only a trio of silhouettes could be seen. These three, who were obviously responsible for this bank robbery, only scoffed as they stared at the mass amounts of S.W.A.T soldiers pointing their assorted array of firearms. The gray titanic figure of the trio closed his eyes with a clear sense of indifference.

"Heh, that 'come out with your hands up' bit never gets old does it?" The raspy voice echoed, sounding as if it could almost make the ground shake.

"Oh yeah Rhino, it's like coffee in the morning. It just wouldn't be the same without it." The one adorned yellow and red chuckled, tossing the bags of money in his hands to the floor.

"Sssso what do you guys think I should do thisssss time? I mean I could impale them with my tail, and watch them sssssquirm. But, I'd alssssso like to give them sssome accciid and… uh watch them sssssquirm!"

The two, who spoke before, looked at the green villain with the large 'scorpion' tail and only shrugged.

"Well first off, I think we should figure out a way to get rid of that annoying lisp of yours. But about what do with these chumps in blue? A little bit of both wouldn't hurt." Shocker chuckled as he turned his attention to the mass of S.W.A.T. units.

'Yo fellas! Sorry to say but uh, that 'hands up' thing is going to have to wait yet again."

Without warning a large blast of pure electrical energy was sent at a nearby S.W.A.T car and as one could only imagine, the results were explosive.

Just as quickly as the car lit up in flames, bullets started to fly, only to be once again rendered useless against these super powered criminals. The two large figures, being Rhino and Scorpion respectively, stood in front of their shorter friend absorbing the relentless bombardment of ammunition with no sense of pain.

"Massages rule!" Rhino smiled.

Scorpion, who was also letting the bullets just ricochet off his emerald armored body, growled. "Heh I feel guilty that we're having all the fun, let usss return the favor shall we!"

Scorpion hissed as he sent his own array of projectiles from his mechanical tail, in the form of hazardous bolts of acid at NYC's finest. To no real surprise the once organized S.W.A.T. formation became a scramble fest for the ages.

"Boy I love it when Venom and Carnage are in town, makes this way too damn easy." Shocker stated as he sent another S.W.A.T. car soaring across the street with a well placed blast using his notorious vibro-shock technology.

"Anything that keeps that ssssppider of my back is fine with me."

Rhino scowled. "Hey, I want some of the fun too ya know!"

"Well dip-shit no one here's stopping you." Shocker snickered. With a menacing glare of pleasure towards the officers in black and blue, Rhino nodded as he started to stomp his feet into the ground. The S.W.A.T. team began to slowly back away knowing that soon 710 lbs of raging fury was going to barrel straight into them.

"ALRIGHT! READY OR NOT! HERE I CO-" Rhino was totally geared up and ready to go but was stopped in his tracks, both mentally and physically.

This distraction was a loud one that was for sure.

"Yay I'm here!" The spontaneous manifestation turned towards the three literally frozen villains.

"Hey there! Wow! Jump City sure looks different! Oh well Larry still loves it! Cool!" The three villains stared blankly at the scene in front of them. Of course that 'oh so' shocking 'scene' was our good ol' friend, the legendary trouble maker himself, Larry.

The cops quickly ceased fire at this new manifestation and were just as baffled. Larry swiftly hovered over towards a speechless Rhino.

"Have-any-of-you-seen Robin! I-am-looking-for-him-because-he's-my-best-friend-and-all-time-favorite-super-hero! He's with the Titans and is kicking bad guy butt! There was Overload! And Cinderblock! And Plasmus! Oh but wow! You're almost as big as they are! Who are you mister! I've never seen you before! You look strong!"

Rhino just scratched his head.

"Um, anyone else a little 'weirded' out over here?" Shocker asked, being just as clueless.

The whole area was completely quiet as Larry continued to well… do his 'Larry' thing.

"Wow this is so cool! You have a horn on your head! Larry likes! Is it real?" Larry began taking his stabs at Rhino's tusk bulging out of his noggin'.

"Hey!"

Rhino attempted to bat the 'fly' away but failed as Larry was already behind Scorpion admiring the villains mechanical 'stinging' tail. Robin's doppelganger began to clap pleasingly. "You guys are neat-o! And you are new here aren't you! Alright! Have you met the Teen Titans yet? I think they'd like you guys!"

All three skewed. "The Teen who?"

"You know! The Teen Titans! There's Raven-Starfire-Beast Boy-Cyborg-and of course ROBIN! The greatest super hero group of all time! And my favorites!"

The sweat drops continued to pour from his 'attentive' listeners. Shocker slowly raised a brow under his mask and looked over towards a just as confused Scorpion. "Um I think I'll just fry him now."

Shocker turned aiming and preparing to fire, only to find that Larry was gone.

"Oh boy! These gloves! They look so cool! I wonder what this does." The boy pressed against the Shocker's fist and sent a shock wave directly towards Scorpion. The emerald adorning thief quickly ducked as the blast grazed against his head. The attack decimated a nearby building and caused another awkward moment of dead silence. The villain with the tail enlarged his yellow eyes in complete 'shock' as he felt at his singed cranium. With gritted teeth Scorpion hissed towards Larry, who only laughed nervously.

"Um Larry is sorry! Heh…heh… heh…"

"No he didn't." Shocker denied. "Tell me he didn't just mess with my vibro-gloves!"

"Messsssed with your glovessss? Messsssed with your glovesss! Who gives a damn! He nearly shot my head off!" Scorpion pointed towards the scorched area on his armored skull. Shocker, who seemed overly angered to say the least, quickly calmed himself while looking at his green 'friend' and laughed.

He turned towards Larry still beside himself in laughter. "Heh! Hey kid um, I gotta say… that was funny."

Scorpion only raised a brow at the statement, almost wanting to give Shocker a taste of battery acid. Larry turned to the masked figure and smiled.

"Really! Yaay! Larry made a funny! Yay!"

"Yea kiddo! Anyone that could tick off Scorpion over here is alright with me! But uh, if I remember correctly, you were looking for someone?"

"Yes! I am looking for Robin! The greatest crime fighter to ever live! He can kick any-"

"Robin huh? Oh yeah I know Robin! I think I saw him just an hour ago." Shocker lied.

Larry as one could only imagine grew extremely excited. "You do-you do-you do-you do? Yaaay! Please tell Larry where he is!"

Rhino scratched his head in a manner that was all too familiar to this mammoth of a buffoon. "Wait Shocker but-"

"Oh come on Rhino! Let's not hold out on the kid here. If he wants er… what was the name again?"

Larry enlarged one of his masked eyes. "Robin?"

"Yea! Robin!" Shocker nodded. "Anyway, I think we should help him out. You know, we can 'send him on his way'… so to speak."

Scorpion slowly nodded, understanding his partner's true intentions. Rhino once again was the odd man out.

"Uh can't we just stomp-"

Scorpion quickly pulled the larger villain aside, whispering into his ear. Larry looked at them still oblivious to the 'masquerade' of friendliness. Rhino suddenly exploded in realization.

"Oh yeah! I know where Robin is!" Rhino exclaimed in a more or less idiotic way. The mild explosion brought both villains beside him to a look of disbelief.

"Yay! You will help Larry find Robin yes?"

Shocker chuckled. "Oh yeah kid, we'll definitely 'help' you. Just uh step over here and my good pal Rhino is going to send you on your way. You won't even have to break a sweat."

Larry happily complied, walking over to the very spot Shocker had pointed to. With a mutual wink, Shocker backed away and Rhino lumbered his way over to the small child casting a large shadow over him. Scorpion tried to hold in his laughter as he spoke.

"Alright kid, have a niccccce trip."

"Larry will! Larry will!" The boy jumped up and down clapping his hands in utter excitement. The boy suddenly stopped his celebration as he apparently had a question.

"Say misters, when will we be-whoooooooooa!"

In a flash Larry found himself accelerating into the air like a speeding bullet, compliments of an Olympic discus like throw from Rhino. After the shock of literally being sent off into the atmosphere mimicking a rocket, the boy laughed seeming to enjoy the rush.

"Hey this is fun!" Larry yelled at the top of his lungs as he disappeared from the villainous trio's sight, totally unknowing to him that he was on a direct crash course to meeting another particular 'special' trio. Three arachnoids to be more specific!

"Wow Rhino, man that was a nice throw." Shocker laughed.

"Yesss, very impressssive."

"I know. It was good wasn't it? Let's see Juggernaut beat that one baby. Woohoo!" Rhino flexed his muscles to both his partners' chagrin. The three with a light sigh turned to the S.W.A.T. team which still seemed a bit taken back by the recent 'Larry' fiasco.

Rhino smiled at their blank faces. "Now, let's see. Where were we again! Oh yeah! READY OR NOT HERE I COME!"

--

**A/N:** You just finished Chapter One! I know it was a little 'Teen Titans' light and the main reason is because I planned on doing one big chapter. Although that died when the length almost reached 13,000 (I'm never doing that again)… so uh be rest assured that when Spidey does finally hit Jump City, it'll be TT happy:-D

**Special Thanks: **Okay I want to thank another author on that goes by the penname of 'Cloudshalo'. Cool guy! I recommend both his 'Spidey/TT' fanfics. They are called 'He's back' and 'Trust'. Also has a new 'Red X' fic too! Check it out! He's helped me a lot with this fanfic, tossing ideas (Lemon juice) and proof reading (Hawkeyes!). So thank you Cloudshalo! You are truly 'God's own personal warrior'. ;) Well if you wanna be I guess.


	2. All Tangled Up pt 2

( - The Daily Bugle - )

The big shot owner himself, Jay Jonah Jameson, sat at his workspace the way he always did. With those two black shoed feet placed comfortably on that messy desktop of course. After one of his signature frustrated sighs, he tossed the newspaper that was in his hands in a fit, making his two advisors who were in front of him jump back a bit. (Rhyme alert.)

"Spider-Man this, Spider-Man that. Ugh what's next? Spider-man's fat? Don't we got anything else to put on the damn front page? Come on people! The public has to be gettin' sick of this masked clown by now."

His not so coincidentally voluptuous female advisor, Carla spoke up. "What are you talking about JJ? He's news. He's hot. He's…"

"He's crap! Crap, crap, crap, crap, crap!"

"Uh that 'crap' is making us a bundle Mr. Jameson!" His male advisor named Robbie replied.

The 'boss' just shook off the replies and spoke with passion. "For months and months, we've been printing about this freak in spider tights. Enough's enough. We need new material! We need something cool, we need something fresh! We need something that screams 'money'! We need a real hero!"

Carla shrugged. "Uh, JJ you can't just expect a hero to come flying through here outta no wh-"

_**CRAAAAAAAAAASH!**_

Jameson and his employees quickly hit the floor as a red blur just flew by them crashing through the adjacent wall.

"What the hell?"

"JAMESON!" 

The whole room full of Daily Bugle employees turned to see an eerily happy looking Venom. The room froze as the infamous black figure walked towards an unmoving JJ. With a violent grab of Jameson's collar, Venom grinned that ugly grin.

"Hey there 'boss'. Great to see you again! Love what you've done with the place." Venom let half of his alien mask retract away while Jameson looked on worryingly.

"Brock, heh, looking 'sharp' as always I see." Jameson replied nervously with a gulp, ironically staring at the symbiote's jagged teeth.

"Why thank you. Sorry we can't really say the same to you old man."

"Okay Brock… Wh-wh-wh-whaat do you want from me?"

Venom only chuckled lightly at the mustached man's shaky question. "Oh we don't want anything from you really. Well maybe besides the wonderful feeling of your tragic death or even you getting rid of that ridiculous crew cut, but no. We're looking for our red and blue loving pal. We think you're familiar with him. He's about yay high-" Venom started to act out his words visually. "Wears a bug suit, really annoying, makes a lot of hand gestures. You know him don't you?"

"Spider-Man."

"Somebody rang?"

Venom turned only to see a glob of web soaring towards him. The symbiote growled as his face was quickly entangled. He grabbed at his face in reaction, of course dropping Jameson on his rear end in the process.

The boss of the Daily Bugle shot our hero a scowling glare. "Spider-Man! I knew you were behind this!"

"Uh remind me JJ. I am behind 'what' again?"

"You two freaks are in this together!"

Spider-Man sighed and shook his head. "You know, I really had it with you bad mouthing me."

Our crimson hero shot a look over towards Venom, who was just successful ripping the last strands of webbing off. 

"Venom, you still want to hurt him?"

"Heh, are you an idiot?"

Spider-Man skewed. "I'll take that as a yes… I think," he sighed. "Anyway I'm not stopping you this time. Go ahead, beat him to a pulp."

The crimson hero crossed his arms in a playful fit, laughing from within as he saw the nervous sweat pour from his boss. "Hey, hey, hey now wait a minute! We can cut a deal here can't we?"

"No Jameson, no 'we' can't."

A desperate Jameson gave a glance over towards the cross armed hero with pleading eyes. "Spider-Man, come on! I take it all back. You're a hero! I promise I'll-"

**_CRAAAAAAASH!_**

All eyes again shot towards the one who had just arrived.

"We don't even want to know what took you so long." Venom growled at Carnage.

"Sorry, nature called." The serial killer shrugged. "A symbiote's gotta go when a symbiote's gotta go, ya know?"

The whole room went dead silent.

"Way more information than needed there Carnage. Way more" Spider-Man groaned.

Venom disregarded the comment standing right above a helpless Jameson, letting a bit of that green saliva drizzle down his overbite. He reached out in threatening grab but, to no real surprise, he was stopped via Spider-Man's crimson fist. The sudden strike sent Venom backpedaling a bit just as another clenched hand rammed straight into his nose nearly knocking him to the floor.

"Oh yeah!" Spider-Man yelled as he quickly launched himself forward with both his feet extended for a kangaroo kick (Er that's what I'll call it anyway). But alas, the attempt was futile, as two black tendrils quickly wrapped around the crime fighter's feet tightly.

"Oh no!" Spidey now yelled as the tendrils then slammed him harshly to the ground. Jameson attempted to take off, but was smacked by a backhand from Carnage sending him barreling into a nearby desk. The two symbiotes laughed at their seemingly inevitable victory.

"You should've let us get to him, 'Spider-Man'." Venom chuckled as Carnage was laughing at Jameson. "Old people are so funny eh dad?"

Spider-Man shook out of his daze and glared back at his arch-enemy. "Sorry Venom, my conscience just won't let me." He paused, "Damn it straight to hell I tell you!"

Spider-Man's impression of an old 'over zealous' actor wasn't amusing Venom a bit. The tendrils pulled our hero up to a face to face glare.

"You're really annoying you know that?" Venom growled as he reared back for a lethal strike.

"And you need a breath mint, do you know that?" Spider-Man braced, ready to defend himself.

_**CRAAAAAAASH!**_

"… what now?" Venom moped as he rolled his eyes. Jameson angrily pounded the ground, surprisingly rivaling Venom's intensity. "Someone is going to pay for all this!"

Carnage blinked his pseudo eyes. "…"

The whole room was frozen.

Spider-Man took a peak around the room. "Um, okay…"

The window crasher frowned. "You are not the Titans, where is Robin?"

Blank stares were exchanged amongst the small group in the office room as this 'mysterious' boy in the red and green tunic looked around in a curious glare. The boy was of course our much beloved Larry! The doppelganger quickly got up and dusted himself off thoroughly. He looked up to see the bewildered group in front of him of course instantly noticing the three large pairs of white pseudo eyes staring at him clueless.

"Wow! Neat costumes!"

The pudgy boy ran up to the arachnoid super trio. Venom, Carnage, and Spider-Man stood completely frozen in their 'pre-attack' stances as he ran around in circles inspecting all three of their attires. With his curious masked eyes locked on Venom. The boy looked up.

"What's your name mister? My name is Noysarg Kcid! But you can call me Larry!" 

Venom paused and then looked towards Carnage and Spider-Man for some feedback. The two crimson arachnoids just shrugged as if to say 'don't look at us'.

"…"

Venom continued to watch our short obnoxious nightmare, staring at him with mystification. Carnage attempted to speak up, unsurprisingly having a bit of trouble doing so. "I… think… we… should…uh… just kill-"

"GAH!"

Carnage was interrupted by his father's uncharacteristic scream and found Venom, shaking violently as the boy he was staring at, literally permeated into the symbiote's physical body. "Get him out!"

Venom began to thrash him self around uncontrollably sending Spider-Man, who was in the tendril grip, along for the crazy ride.

"Jeez Venom, will you just calm-"

The crimson hero was interrupted as Larry literally popped out of the back of Venom's head bringing a bemused laugh out of him.

"Why you little-" Venom attempted to grab at the boy but missed his opportunity, inadvertently hitting himself. "OW!"

Venom's neck began to work over time as he attempted to lock on to his equally 'spazzing' target. Larry popped out of his shoulder, then his back, then his other shoulder, then his leg. All the while saying remarks such as "Cool!", "Wow this is neato!", "Hey, this is fun!"

Carnage chuckled in heavenly amusement. "I gotta say pops. This is freakin' hilarious!"

"Yea Venom, I even think he likes you." Spider-Man was so amused he could even think of escaping the loosening grasp.

"Wow, never seen my pops this worked up, good job kid. Hehe."

"Shut the hell up and get him out!" Venom growled. Carnage only laughed as he slowly walked over towards the flailing villain.

"Alright, alright, alright. Sheesh don't need to get that tongue of yours all tied up now. Let's see here…" Carnage waited for the boy to show his face and as on cue Larry popped out of Venom's chest.

"Cool is that a spider!"

"Gotcha!" Carnage grabbed the boy by his black cape and with a harsh pull the boy was face to face with the 'ugly'. Venom angrily snarled as he too grabbed onto Larry's cape. Spider-Man only chuckled still being in the awestruck.

"Now you guys know I got a Spider-sense and all, but seriously I really didn't see that coming at all."

Venom ignored and began to fume his anger. "Let's kill him." 

Carnage complied to his predecessor's command by shape-shifting his hand into an axe.

"And I thought you'd never ask." Carnage smiled sickeningly, Larry shook his head at the very sight of the axe. "Kill Larry? No! Please don't do that!"

"Carnage don't!"

Spider-Man like always was ignored.

"Don't worry kid," Carnage chuckled. "According to 'Serial Killer's Digest' decapitation is the best way to go out!"

Carange reared back for a killing strike and launched his suit created weapon forward.

"Gah!" Larry closed his eyes and in a counter move (or a desperation move), sent his glowing finger at the axe. The two met and there was a bright light that pulsated through the entire room, leaving the area in complete and utter silence.

Jameson was a bit startled at the sight to say the least as he slowly got up from under his desk. With a curious glare he walked over, starring at a sitting Larry in a blank manner.

"Hey kid, uh do you realize what you just did?"

Larry gawked at his finger which was shooting out a bit of 'magical' sparks – it was apparently damaged. He groaned. "Uh I think I made a boo boo?"

"Hah, you kidding?" Jameson chuckled. "Kid, you just got rid of three of the worst criminals in New York City!"

Everyone looked and took note that Venom, Carnage, and Spider-Man were no where to be found. Larry shrugged with an innocent glare. "I did?"

"Come on kid! You're a hero!" 

Larry perked up. "A hero! Like Robin?"

"Uh yea sure, whatever," Jameson quickly turned to his employees. "I want it on the headlines! Uh what's your name kid?"

"Nosyarg Kcid! But my friends call me Larry!"

"You have friends?"

"Yes!"

"Hmm, okay people! Tomorrow's headline 'Larry thwarts overtaking by Spider-Man and his Cronies!'" Jameson yelled to the dismay of mostly everyone in the office. He turned back to an always ecstatic Larry. "Kid, I'm gonna make you into a star!"

"A star?" Larry's eyes grew even larger.

"Betty give this kid a cash reward and a free copy of the newspaper… or uh… just the free copy of the newspaper anyway." Jameson yelled towards his secretary. Larry looked around in disbelief.

"I'm a hero? I'm a hero! Yay!"

( - Jump City: Wayne Enterprises Storage Facilities - )

100,000 volts of concentrated electricity and a bad attitude is never a good combination. So keeping that in mind, one could say 'tough luck' for the Titans because that combination was executed to perfection by their not so good pal Overload. At this point in the fight, the circuit board gone mad was throwing a bit of a fit, but anyone would be a bit angered after being smacked around by a flying robotic fist powered by a godly amount of rocket propulsion.

"Overload will win! Yes he will!" The electrical monster growled as he blasted another box of crates into smithereens. Narrowly escaping the blast was a clearly pumped up Cyborg, who only smirked confidently at the electrical menace.

"Man, you must be joking. The only thing you're gonna win bolt boy, is a Grade-A ass kicking compliments of Cyborg baby!"

Cyborg then launched his famous (or infamous) sonic attack at the monster sending it reeling back in pain. From across the warehouse Beast Boy, the emerald raptor, was being chased by a giant blob of purple goo that he couldn't seem to shake. The big goop known as Plasmus laughed as he maneuvered his oozing projectiles after the green changeling. Leaping over numerous obstacles, Beast Boy quickly grew worried as he was rapidly running out of room; not to mention running out of things to hide behind.

"Uh dudes? A little help over here!" The changeling quickly morphed back into his human form to hide under a steel crate. His cry for help was quickly answered from above. Like a fierce hail storm, a rapid fire of green starbolts forced Plasmus to stop his relentless chase. The purple sludge monster roared in ache as the well placed blasts forced the creature to fall back, punctured with numerous holes in its already unstable body.

Beast Boy looked up at the smiling Tamaranean who had just aided him with happy eyes. The humorous Titan began to do a little dance and chanted in a hip hop rhythm. "Go Starfire! Go Starfire! Go Starfire! Go Starfire!"

The alien girl in purple giggled like the cute little firecracker she was and waved at her green friend. Suddenly Robin came darting by Starfire and brought his booted foot across Cinderblock's face. Chips of concrete spewed to the floor as the block monster fell on its bottom, literally making the ground shake from impact.

The Boy Wonder turned his head to the air, to find the mystical Titan Raven ready for orders. "Raven now!"

The sorceress only nodded behind the shadows of her hood and extended both hands towards a near by support pole.

"Azarath," Her eyes gave that 'oh so cool' white glow.

"Metrion," Her hands emitted that wavy black aura.

"ZINTH-"

(Pause)

And this was supposed to be the part where she hurled an object towards Cinderblock right? Well that is right, _but_ fate as it seems had other plans.

(Unpause)

A large flash of light lit up the dark warehouse temporarily blinding the Titans as well as the three creatures they were battling. A loud yell erupted from the mutual groaning shared by the heroes and villains in the vicinity.

"Whoooa!"

Raven rubbed her eyes and quickly looked up in shock to see a red figure barreling down right at her. Before even a murmur could be heard, the crimson blur collided with the hooded mystic and sent Raven tumbling to the ground. Meanwhile the rest of the Titans tried to shake off the 'colorful spots' they were seeing to get a glance of what was happening.

"That was uh, sorta bright." Cyborg muttered as he was continually blinking his one humanoid eye, trying to get his vision back.

"Yea that was. I can't even see diddly squat. Ah!" Beast Boy screamed in his usual high pitched fashion, rubbing his eyes like a maniac.

"Guys er, what was that?" Robin asked as he too was blinking profusely.

Starfire cracked opened her right emerald glowing eye towards the Boy Wonder ever so slightly. "It was very pretty friends. But sadly I also do not know of the cause."

While the four Titans and creatures continued to fight for their vision, Raven only was just regaining her composure.

"Ugh," Raven groaned as she slowly opened her eyes to see a mask adorned in red and white with an unusual web like pattern molded onto it. To no surprise the two grounded persons stared at one another with oblivious gazes, inches away from contact and totally dumbfounded.

"Somethin' tells me I'm not in New York anymore, can't quite put my finger on it though." The masked mystery on top of Raven muttered as he rubbed his aching head. 

Raven raised a brow, too curious even to notice that the mystery was still lying upon her at a range that screamed 'intimate', especially for this certain mystic. _Purple hair and eyes, a red gemstone on the forehead, and gray skin, now that's something you don't see everyday._

"Who… are you?" Raven asked.

The white pseudo eyes glared at the sorceress' purple ones still a bit shaken. "Funny, I was gonna ask the same thing."

The answer could wait… or at least it had to - as there was a loud roar that shot from behind the two. With a motion seemingly almost as quick as lightning, Raven found herself rolling across the ground with the red adorned boy, ending up to where she was now the one on top. The girl scowled towards the masked boy under her with a furious look.

"Why the hell-" The answer seemed to come a bit quicker as Cinderblock's large fist slammed into the previous area where the two were, sending a large amount of concrete spewing up to the air. The sorceress looked back towards the red mystery under her and muttered to herself. "Oh."

Still holding onto Raven around her waist, our hero leapt up to his feet ninja style bringing them both to an abrupt stand. The mystic Titan was still a bit awe struck as she continued to stare at this surprise. A purple blob suddenly erupted from the floor making the two close heroes break their gazes.

_And I thought Doc Conners going lizard was the ugliest thing I ever saw, boy were you wrong Spidey._ An enraged Plasmus came charging at the two growling, only to be on the receiving end of a well placed sonic blast.

"Booyah!"

_Boo what?_ Spider-Man thought but sighed with relief as the purple blob was swiftly cut-off. He instinctively turned to make sure the girl he was protecting was alright, but she seemed to have literally disappeared. "Um, alrighty then."

The muttering stopped as once again his spider-sense went off. With a natural impulse he quickly flipped into the air dodging another attempted whacking from Cinderblock. The crimson hero with a corkscrew twist landed on the concrete monster's back clinging on for dear life.

_Alright, what the heck is happening here!_ Spider-Man scowled, barely clinging on.

A loud battle cry took the complete attention of the masked crusader. It was a cry from Robin, as he was making short work of Cinderblock's face; smashing the concrete dome with repeated swings of his steel bo-staff. Spider-Man swiftly flipped off the distracted creature's back and fired two web lines onto the shoulders of the large behemoth. Already reeling from Robin's flurries, Cinderblock easily fell with a swift pull of the gray strands adhered to him. With a loud crash the block monster was officially taken down. Spidey finally breathed a bit easier as he watched the concrete monster groan in defeat.

"Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos!"

Spider-Man looked up to see the girl he was 'protecting' magically levitating in the air. "Uh, gazoontite?" he mocked but quickly dropped his jaws in shock. Spidey looked on in amazement as a large steel rod, shining a wavy black, was being forcibly bent as if it were 'Play-doh'. The mass of metal enwrapped the concrete monster like a piece of rope, preventing any type of escape.

"Now _that_ is something you don't see everyday." Spider-Man muttered as he began to contemplate on his current predicament. "Cool." The arachnoid looked around to see a battle clearly nearing its end. The large electrical being that once stood tall had become a small floppy disk. The purple monster that Spider-Man deemed 'uglier than the Lizard' was lying on the floor exhausted; and of course we all know what happened to Cinderblock.

Spider-man looked towards the cemented ground in complete confusion. _Okay, I was fighting Venom and Carnage, some weird little kid shows up… yea… and then… that's it! This must be a dream. It has to be… _

"Hey there," A voice shot from behind the red masked teenager. Spider-Man turned and huffed at the group of five standing in front of him _Or not._

The boy in the red tunic stepped up and extended a hand. "Nice moves back there, you mind if I ask you for a name?"

Spider-Man cautiously took the hand shake but froze as he stared at Robin. _Well it feels real… Wait… black eye mask; tunic; gloves. This kid looks like the one that… but it can't be._

Before Spider-Man could answer the literal green one of the group started to fire off his large mouth. 

"Dude, nice costume, who designed that for ya? You gotta give me a name! By the way that was so sweet how you were rolling, flipping, and twirling. Oh and that bright light entrance was pretty kick ass too! And was that web coming out of your hands? That was so cool! Uh do yo-" A large robotic arm wrapped across the boy's green chops.

"Sorry 'bout that. This guy has a little trouble zipping it up sometimes." Cyborg answered muffling an obviously angered and cross armed Beast Boy. Spider-Man was still a bit 'out of it' and exposed it with his speechless demeanor. "Yeah,"

Starfire quickly flew over joining Robin, and sending Spider-Man stuttering back a bit in surprise.

"Hello interesting costume adoring young boy who aided us! My name is Starfire!" The alien girl said with a large smile while forcing her face close to his.

"Um hello." Spider-Man slowly backed his head away, in shock of this girl's intense kindliness.

"Quickly! Where-do-you-come-from-How-did-you-get-here- What-is-your-favorite-color-Do you wish to be my friend?"

Spider-Man sweat dropped at the curiosity and the sheer hyper-active nature of this strange orangey skinned girl. "Um, New York City, I honestly don't know, red, and uh I guess so?" 

Starfire happily nodded as she spontaneously hugged the boy, squeezing all the air out of him. After a few seconds of complete dazing, Spider-Man was let go and stood shakily, almost in disbelief at the act of extreme friendliness. _Oooow_

"New York huh? Cool, always cool to meet a fellow New Yorker." Cyborg grinned with an excited fist pump.

_A fellow New Yorker? I've never seen this guy in my life, and I think I would notice someone like this. _Spider-Man glared at the large cybernetic teen.

"Sweetness the NYC. Always wanted to go there, I hear the chicks are mighty groovy." Beast Boy nodded. Spider-Man only rubbed the back of his head trying to absorb the situation to no avail. He shot a look to the quiet girl in blue and black who seemed to be staring at him in an eerie way. The vibes he was getting from her were a bit uneasy yet intriguing. _Looks like she wants to kill me… well ya did kinda 'drop' in on her Pete, oh boy. More hatin'._

Robin cleared his throat. "So, we still haven't got your name." The statement calmly brought Spider-Man back to reality.

"Uh, I'm Pe… uh… Spider-Man."

"Whoa why didn't I guess that? A little too obvious, but uh it gets the job done." Cyborg winked. Raven finally spoke all be it a bit harshly. "Oh, and you being named 'Cyborg' isn't too obvious?"

The 'cyborg' was speechless.

Beast Boy scratched his head. "Dude! Spider-'Man' eh? Wait, how old are ya?"

"Sixteen I believe."

The green Titan looked over towards his teammates with a frustrated look. "See! He's a teen and he gets to use 'man'. That's totally unfair! Why can't I be Beastman?"

The rest of the Titans only ignored his plea like usual and stayed focused on the new hero.

"It is nice to meet you friend Spider-Man!" Starfire cheered.

"Well Spider-Man, I'm Robin." The Boy Wonder nodded and looked over towards the changeling and the half-droid. "And this is Beast Boy and Cyborg." The two 'homeboys' of the Titans followed with friendly waves forcing the crimson hero to give a shaky wave back.

Robin then turned to Raven and Starfire with a light chuckle. "And uh I think you already got to meet Raven and Starfire up close and personal." Spider-Man only shrugged with a nervous laugh as Raven picked the perfect opportune time to dust herself off.

"Yeah! Up close and personal for sure! You and Raven had a little 'Jiggy' going on down there. Rollin' on the..." Cyborg was stopped abruptly, catching a glimpse at two very familiar 'enflamed' purple eyes. "Er… alrighty then, I never said a thing."

There was a moment of silence as Raven was either boiling mad or utterly embarrassed with flushed cheeks. The sorceress finally noticing that she was 'un-hooded' quickly brought the hood over her face, in an almost infuriated manner but it was hard to tell. _Awkward Spidey… Awkward. _

Cyborg, being no fool, quickly changed subjects. "So what brings a fellow New York hero here to Jump City? A new S.T.A.R. recruit? Uh, I mean you are a hero right? You can't be running around in red and blue tights for fun." Cyborg paused. "Or can you?"

Spider-Man raised a brow from under his mask. "No, no, no I'm a hero I guess but… Jump City?"

The five teens looked at one another confused and returned their gazes. Beast Boy spoke. "Yea, Jump City dude, as the city you are in. As in here 'right now'?"

The green one finished and turned towards Cyborg with a suggestive stare. "I think this guy is a little slow." The half-droid only replied by forcibly turning the BB's head back to the front.

"Wait, how could you travel over 3000 miles and not know what city you're in?" Robin asked.

"Uh, this is America right?"

"Yes, yes it is! The glorious land of the free! Where going to the mall of shopping is considered the highest priority!" Starfire replied all too happily.

"Dude, do you even know what state you're in?" Beast Boy asked with a skewed look on his green face.

"I… uh… nope guess not."

"Wow, and I thought I was always lost." Beast Boy added with a head scratch.

"Traveling without a clear destination. Very interesting." Raven half-smiled. "I think you should try that sometime Beast Boy." Our changeling stared blankly while Cyborg chimed in. "Man, you can't be serious. You have no idea where you are?"

Spider-Man finally shook out of his dazed trance, or at least he finally tried to. "Alright that does it! Yeah! Okay? I have no clue where the heck I am. And I sure as hell don't know who the heck you all are. I just want some answers and I want them right now!"

"Wha?" The Titans almost looked insulted. 

Cyborg grumbled. "You don't know who we are? Bah, come on man! We're the Teen Titans!"

" . . . "

Beast Boy sprayed a bit of his breath on his gloved knuckles and rubbed the collar of his purple vest. "Yea dude, the most 'awesomest' teenage crime fighting group in the world! Everybody knows us. You live under a rock or something?"

Spider-Man only gave an inaudible 'right' as he pointed to Robin. "You, you did this."

Robin only looked at the masked boy confused. "I… did… what?"

"You… you… I was fighting… and then… you and the finger… and then the flashing lights! You! Yea! You brought me here, and you can take me back!"

"Uh, what are you talking about?" Robin tilted his head.

"I don't know how you got so tall and skinny but you gotta send me back!" 

Spider-Man stared at Robin who only seemed to be still out of the loop. The frustration quickly grew into hopelessness as he knew in his gut that Robin was being sincere. The boy that transported him here wasn't nearly this calm.

"Ah never mind," Spider-Man slowly slumped to the floor in a cross legged manner.

The group looked at one another. Raven spoke. "Did you say… finger?"

Spider-Man only nodded, reveling in his helpless position.

Robin's masked eyes suddenly enlarged. "Uh say, was this 'finger' glowing by any chance?"

The arachnoid perked up. "Yeah! Yeah it was!"

The Titans looked at one another yet again realizing who was behind this. They said the name in unison.

"Larry."

"Yea! That's his name!" Spider-Man chuckled as he seemed to be finally getting somewhere. He felt a presence closing in on him; it was Raven, with a curious glare on her gray face.

"So you aren't from this world?" Raven asked with a slight change in her usually indifferent tone. Spider-Man ironically seemed to be the drearier of the two at this point. "I guess not, but I want to go back. Can you guys help me?"

The Titans looked at one another with saddened faces. Robin spoke with disappointment. "I'm sorry, but only Larry could help you out here. And until he shows up again, I guess you're stuck here for now."

Spider-Man quickly sprung to his feet sending the Titans backpedaling out of shock. "STUCK? STUCK? I can't! I can't be here! I have a life! Aunt May, my job, school, being Spider-Man."

"Sorry dude but chill. Believe me, we all want to help you out but we're not into that inter-dimensional transportation jive." Cyborg hand motioned the crimson hero to 'chill out'. Spider-Man once again plopped onto the floor. _Aunt May is so gonna kill me._

"That Larry, what a crazy guy." Beast Boy laughed quietly to himself. Cyborg looked at our dejected crimson hero and turned to his teammates with a frown. "Guys I think we should take him in."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! I dunno, I mean remember last time we did something like-" Beast Boy interrupted only to be countered.

"Look, this guy has no place to go. Man he's not even from this plane of existence. What are we just going to do? Just leave him here? That's not cool ya'll."

Spider-Man rolled his eyes behind his mask as the two arguing Titans seemed to be totally disregarding his presence. Robin noticed this and walked over to his team. "Titans huddle up."

The Titans formed a tight circle. Spider-Man looked on totally clueless, trying to decipher some of the whispering going on in the huddle.

"_Guys… psst psst… Terra…"_

"_Yea… but… psst… psst…"_

"_pssst… Raven what do you think? You're a human psst detector…"_

"_I don't trust… psst… psst…" _

"_psst… but we can't just leave… psst…"_

"_Yea… psst… anyone that has to deal with Larry… deserves a psst."_

"_Dudes, we… psst… learn… psst… this guy could be Slade in disguise." _

"_Psst… you crazy? Psst… a goner…"_

"… _I just don't know… psst…"_

"_Friends psst looks so helpless… psst… should… psst…"_

"_Look… did you see what he… pssst… do?"_

"_It psst… impressive."_

"… _psst… this to a vote…"_

The whispering seemed to have died down and only silent nods started manifesting in the circle. Robin slowly turned with a slight smile towards the boy. "Alright,"

A large screech from a tire was heard interrupting the Boy Wonder. All eyes shot towards the new arrivals.

Cyborg frowned. "Uh oh, we got company."

( - Across town - )

"Wowzers!" A mask-less Carnage (or Cletus Cassidy) laughed with excitement while staring into a side view mirror of a blue Toyota Corolla. The red haired, green eyed 'teen' was chuckling mad as he touched his thin face amazed at the transformation that took place.

"I can't believe this man," Cassidy smirked. "I'm a teen again!" he gave a glare over towards an unmasked Venom (or Eddie Brock). Sitting on the curb clearly upset, Eddie was looking towards the ground in disappointment. He indifferently flexed his right arm and looked at the biceps muscle bulging out. "Damn more freakin' hard work down the drain… shit."

Cassidy only chuckled at his 'new' friend's obsession with pumping the weights. "Come on Venom! This is great. I always dreamed of being a kid again. Ah my glory years! I got so much done in that short time."

Eddie gave an annoyed look over towards the incredibly de-aged Carnage. "Here's an idea offspring, why don't you just shut the hell up while 'us' intelligent beings try to figure out what happened."

Cassidy ignored the suggestion. "Wow I forgot how awesome it felt to be a teenager. I feel like I'm sixteen, just like Spider-dork. And by the way you've grown a bit younger too. That 'coo coo' kid must have done this."

"Oh don't ever mention that 'kid' again. And who gives a shit 'who' did 'what'? We're younger, and we're in some city that's not supposed to exist. Oh joy!"

"Oh lighten' up 'Eddie'. You're looking at the negatives. Think of the positives! Think of the possibilities!" Cassidy yelled slapping Brock on the back. Eddie glared at him with only angered eyes.

"First off unless you want that arm ripped off, don't touch us again. Secondly, positives? What the hell are you babbling about?"

"There's always a positive man. Think about it. How long have we symbiotes been stuck in that dump called New York City?"

"For six months-"

"Alright, in all those months we've killed thousands upon thousands right?"

"Give or take,"

"Well I don't know about you but I was gettin' sick of it. I've stabbed too many people at the Brooklyn Bridge, I've tossed too many people off the Empire State building, and I am totally sure I'm tired of writing 'Carnage was here' in blood on that same damn wall in Harlem."

Venom sighed. "We know you aren't much on having a 'point' with discussions but dare we ask if you have one this time?

Cassidy pointed out all the young civilians of Jump City 'ripe for the taking'. "Look shit for brains. We've been given rejuvenated youth and sent to a city we thought never existed. There's new faces, new people, or you could just call them new 'victims' if you'd like. You know what? You could even call this a new start! Or a renaissance if you will, for the two strongest symbiotes ever!"

"Wow, we're shaking with excitement." Eddie mocked. Cassidy growled.

"Come on think of it! We can run this joint! This could be the fresh start we need. This town won't even know what hit them! With us together as one cohesive team no one can stop us. This will be a symbiote's playground."

"Right,"

"It'll be awesome dad! We'll make a great partnahs! We'll be like Startsky and Hutch! No! We'll be like Method Man and Redman! No! We'll be like Beavis and Butthead! Of course you're gonna be Butthead but, but you get the picture. That's the perfect comparison isn't it! Unless, that is, if you can think of a better one."

A glaring Brock spoke like a drone. "Parker."

"'Parker'? What? Sorry but I don't think Spider-dork had a partner, that wouldn't work."

"No dumbass, look!"

The two newly made teens quickly walked over to the nearby electronics store which had numerous T.V. monitors set up for sale. Incidentally all of the screens were showing the same exact channel. The two intrigued and disguised symbiotes glared on, listening in.

It was a News broadcast of some sort with a young woman with a microphone and a certain group of special teenagers standing behind her.

--

_April O'Neil: "This is April O'Neil of channel 9 JCTV, reporting live from Wayne Enterprises Storage Facilities. Just a few moments ago the pride and joy of our fine town, the Teen Titans have brought evil doers to justice yet again. We have the exclusive and they are standing by. Now Robin can you describe what exactly happened tonight?"_

The girl pointed her microphone towards the eye masked teen. Crossing his arms, Robin began to speak.

_Robin: "Well you see Cinderb-"_

Beast Boy suddenly jumped in front of the group and grabbed the mic to Robin's and April's extreme displeasure.

_Beast Boy: "First off I'd just like to say that we totally kicked bad guy hiney today! It was a total breeze dudes. I mean they tried to gang up on us and we still took them all to school! By the way if any of you 'fly' ladies out there want to get the chance to hang out with a real hero this weekend then-" _

Cyborg with an impatient groan took the spotlight shoving Beast Boy to the back. The half-droid gave the camera a large smile and began to speak the way he always did - loudly.

_Cyborg: "Hey ya'll out there in T.V. land! This is your fav bad guy butt kicker Cyborg and I just wanted to say that if ya'll want to be as energetic as me? Pick up a can of 'Booyah' Powered Energy drink! Remember kids, if it doesn't say 'Booyah', then no-good it will do ya!"_

Beast Boy quickly shoved the half-droid out of the way.

_Beast Boy: "Dude no one cares about that stupid drink alright! (Clears throat) Sorry I was rudely interrupted ladies but like I said,"_

The changeling and half-droid now had their hands on the microphone pulling the reporter back and fourth.

_Cyborg: "First off my drink isn't stupid! And man will you quit it? Why don't you go find a date the old fashioned way! Ya know, like asking a girl out directly?"_

_Beast Boy: "Uuuuh-"_

Suddenly a black field of energy separated the two and shoved them away from the camera's view abruptly. A silent mouthing of the word 'thank you' from April brought a slight nod from Raven.

_April: "Okay! Um why don't we move on? It seems that you have a new member back there? Mind to fill our viewers in?" _

All eyes shot towards Spider-Man who only scratched his head at the attention. The Titans chuckled a bit as April centered the mic. on the entire group.

_Robin: "Well he's not a new member, at least not yet anyway." _

Spider-Man stood behind completely still and silent. Starfire playfully nudged the boy forward.

_Starfire: "Please friend, introduce your self! Do not be shy! Curiosity is abound!"_

Spider-Man slowly walked up to the mic and leaned forward.

--

"Parker is such a poon." Cassidy chuckled.

"Right, and his new 'friends' don't look too bright either." Eddie replied.

"Uh ya know me dad, and even I'll say I ain't much of a thinker but uh… how come Spider-nerd doesn't look any smaller? He looks… the same."

"And how are we supposed to know this? What do we look like to you, Bill Nye the Science Guy?"

--

_Spider Man: "Uh hey everybody, uh so I guess you all want to know my name right? Well my name is Spider-Man. I'm 16, and uh I love web-slinging, fighting bad guys, eating pizza, reading comics-"_

_Raven: "Um, I don't think they wanted your autobiography." _

The crimson hero chuckled as he rubbed his neck.

_Spider-Man: "Bummer."_

_Robin: "Right. Anyway we're offering him to stay with us, and offering him a spot to become a Titan. That is… if he wants to."_

_Spider-Man: "Wh-what? Hey wait a sec… I appreciate the offer but-"_

_Starfire: "Please friend, we will not take no for an answer! That is correct Raven?"_

_Raven: "…"_

_Beast Boy: "Hey guys aren't we kinda rush-"_

Beast Boy was quickly cut-off.

_April: "So 'Spider-Man' tell us! Are you going to be a Titan?" _

The boy in red looked around him to see all eyes glaring at him waiting for an answer.

_Spider-Man: "Um… I don't know… I mean… I got so much to do ya know?"_

Cyborg just pulled the babbler into a 'buddy' like headlock and grabbed the mic.

_Cyborg: "That's a yes ya'll! So baddies beware! Because this guy is for now a temporary Titan baby! He flips, he dips, he runs, he jumps, he crawls, he twirls, and most important he kicks bad guy behind! Booyah! Spider-Man is coming right at yah!"_

From the Cyborg's headlock only came a somewhat harsh sigh.

_Spider-Man: "Um yay?"_

_Starfire: "THIS IS TRULY GLORIOUS!"_

_Robin: "(Extending a hand to Spider-Man) Welcome to the team."_

Spider-Man reluctantly accepts the hand and the small little party began. The camera pulls away from the celebrating Titans and closes in on April.

_Cyborg: "Time for a good ol' fashioned DONUT RUN!"_

_April: "So you heard it here first folks. The Titans have a new member. What this means to the city will only be answered in the future. This is April O'Neil for channel 9 news signing off."_

--

A pair of teenage males looking to be around thirteen and watching nearby began to scoff at the screen. Cassidy and Brock looked towards their direction with curious glares.

"Oh God, he can't be a Titan. Did you see how he was dressed?"

"Oh I know! He'll never replace Terra. She was awesome and she was a total babe."

"Dude no she wasn't! What are you smoking?"

"Yes she was! You don't know what the hell you're talking about."

"What-ev-er! What's next? Are you gonna say Mas Y Menos are awesome too?"

"Well… yeah."

Eddie and Cassidy shot each other blank glares as they only shrugged, being totally oblivious to the names.

"So, nerd boy made it over here after all." Brock mused.

"I told ya this is perfect! I can't wait to see Spider Dork's face when he sees that we've found the fountain of youth!

"We must say," Brock grinned. "This might be fun. But let's lay low, we'll drop in on our little bug when he least expects it."

"Lay low? Bah! Let's trash up the place right here and right now!"

"No."

"Killjoy Venom is here to wreck the day yet again."

"Fine, maybe a kill here and there won't be too bad. But first, we need to make a stop. We have a freakin' craving for-"

"Brains?" Cassidy asked with excited eyes. Brock simply shook his head.

"No," He smiled, "We want a damn slurpie."

There was yet another awkward pause. Cassidy slowly nodded.

"You know what? That sounds really good right now. Wow, becoming a teen again has brought that stupid craving back. Too cool." Cassidy laughed in amazement. They both began to walk off in search for a convenient store.

"Yea, becoming a teenager has opened our mind again as well. Tell us, do you notice how as you get older you never actually 'go' specifically to a convenient store for a slurpie?"

"So true dad! I mean it's always, I'm getting some gas, 'Oh let's get a slurpie!', or I'm buying some Spam, 'Oh let's get a slurpie! It's always an after thought.'"

"That's what we're saying! You've noticed that too?"

"Of course! Ah, what we 'grown ups' were missing out on. You know-" The 'random' conversation stopped as Eddie and Cassidy's attention was taken by a couple of screaming kids.

"Take that back! Terra was the best!"

"No, no she wasn't! Live with it."

The two boys started to shove each other to Cassidy's and Brock's amusement. The crazier of the two perked up as he had an idea.

"Hey dad you know what-"

"No," Eddie interrupted. "Don't even think about it. It's not worth it."

"Aw come on! A little bit of fun isn't going to completely blow our cover." Cassidy persuaded with an evil grin. Brock continued to shake his head in disapproval. "No,"

"Come on! Heeeeello! Have you looked at yourself! Lighten up! We're teens again! Let's have some fun with it God dammit!" Carnage pleaded. Brock just sighed and looked away with a shrug seeming to say 'whatever'. Cassidy jumped for joy and made his way over to the two bickering youngins in a furious sprint.

"Hey fellas what's the problem here?" Cletus asked separating the two from their throat grasps rather forcibly.

"This is none of your business kid!"

"Yea! Keep out of this and piss off!"

Cassidy shot a look over at Eddie and mouthed the words 'they called me kid!', Brock mouthed back what looked to be something like 'We don't give a shit.' and started to check out the Jump City skyline.

_THIS IS WAY TOO COOL!_ Carnage thought as he quickly returned his attention towards the children.

"Aw come on 'dudes'. No need to be such 'haters'. I just wanted to show you guys something really cool." Carnage gave his best but futile attempts to sound 'hip'.

The two kids quickly groaned. "Dudes? Haters? What the hell? Are you from the 80's or something?"

Carnage chuckled. "Nah, that would be more like my pops over there."

The two kids froze looking over at Venom who just nodded.

"Uh he's your pops?" Stare. "But uh… he's like a teenager…"

"Yea, he looks just as old as you. Man you're crazy."

Carnage playfully rubbed his chin at the 'insult'. "Crazy huh? Gee thanks kid. But oh, right. How could that work? We look the same age! Yet I'm his kid. That's psycho! That's impossible for humans, right?"

"Uh… right," Both boys muttered in unison.

"Yea that would be crazy… but wait a second here! Hah! I almost forgot to tell you guys." Carnage smiled. "I'm not human."

"What the hell are you talkin' about?" The shorter of the two kids asked.

"It's hard to explain. Showing you would be way easier."

Poor kiddies for sure.

That extremely infamous red goo shot out from behind the chuckling teen's back making the two kids freeze in amazement and of course complete fear. That wicked 'Carnage' mask quickly engulfed Cassidy's face. A sharp row of teeth later and it was at this moment, for the very first time, that Jump City got a true glimpse of the horrors of an alien symbiote.

The two children stood as if their hearts had literally stopped. Their skin paled to a complexion that only could be compared to Jump City's two resident sorceresses.

"…"

Carnage began to crack his neck rather forcibly as he laughed at the two with his warped voice. After a bit of playful silence the teenage symbiote brought his gruesome face up close to the children.

"Oh yeah I forgot to mention this," Carnage chuckled and then started to let his signature tendrils whirl frantically. The children in a petrified glare watched as the symbiotic tentacles patted them on the head in a 'friendly' manner. The red skulled villain then suddenly exploded with one simple word.

"BOO!"

"AAAAAAAAAAH!" The two children literally fell on their backs and took off running, stumbling, and falling constantly as they fled. Carnage laughed loudly as he quickly shifted back into his human form.

"Shoot, nine years younger and I still got it." Cassidy chuckled. Brock sighed as he spoke in a bored fashion. "We are truly freakin' amazed."

"You're giving me props? Wow hell has frozen over." Eddie simply shook his head. "No, we're amazed that the kids were more scared of the symbiote's face than the one you're wearing right now."

The civilian clothed 'Venom' quickly turned his back and walked off. Cassidy scowled and replied with a cynical scoff. "HAH! That was soooo funny."

"Oh yeah, we crack ourselves up all the time."

The two newly made teenagers then began their 'epic' quest to finding a nearby convenient store as they made their way down the streets of Jump City. But like always even more trouble lurked in the shadows for little did they know that there was someone with glowing "Blood' red eyes, following their every move.


	3. Of Clapper and Slurpie

Just imagine for a second that you've been taken from your home and then suddenly were forced to move fifty miles away in about uh… let's just say thirty minutes. That's bad right?

Sure it is!

Okay! Now let's just imagine you've been taken away from the current country you live in and are forced to move to another country in oh… let's just say fifteen minutes. That's really bad right?

Sure it is!

Alright let's do this now shall we? Let's imagine that you've been taken from the very plane of existence you have lived in for your whole entire life. And in a split second, tossed into a place that you're so unfamiliar with, your head feels like it's spinning like a merry go round just trying to make any sense of it all. That's really really really really bad right?

Duh! Sure it is! You'd be completely lagged! You'd be completely gagged! You might even be completely zig-zagged! 

(Heavy breathing)

Well, if you would feel this way (And I know you would!), then all that should be said to you is this.

'Welcome to the Amazing Spider-Man's world.'

Yesiree, this was exactly how our favorite wall crawler felt at this particular time, probably even worse. And who could fault him? Taking into account that the 'really really really really bad' stuff always happened to him? He should be irate! It truly seemed like no matter how 'good' he was, or what noble deeds he performed, or how many lives he saved, this kid _always_ got the short end of the stick.

Always

But little did this inter-dimensional traveling hero know that this whole 'Larry' accident, just like the one he received with the spider bite, had the potential to be one of those rare blessings in disguise. And as the boy in red stared at the sight in front of him, he finally began to catch a glimpse of the potential.

"Whoa." 

The Titans got an amused chuckle out of Spidey's Keanu Reeves like expression.

Robin nodded. "Gets that kind of reaction every time eh Cy?"

"I built most of it man, of course it's gonna get that reaction every time." The half-droid bragged.

Spider-Man scratched his head. "So this is where you guys live?" he slowly lifted his head up staring at the sky scraping 'T', feeling totally belittled. He gulped. _Uh, not bad._

"Yes friend, this is our home!" Starfire cheered. "I truly cannot wait to be able to share with you the gloriousness of our dwellings. We will have much fun! The excitement will rival our celebrations of Tamaran's annual Zorchnar festival!" 

This alien always loved having company as one could easily tell.

Spider-Man nodded blankly, disregarding the words 'Tamaran' and 'Zorchnar' of course, still mesmerized by the tower. 

Titans Tower in all its magnificence and splendor like Cyborg and Robin were discussing, always had that affect on first timers. Let's see, towers to visit off the top of the head… there's the Eiffel tower, the Sears Tower, the Leaning Tower of Pisa, and then of course the one we all love the most… Titans Tower.

People would flock from all across the U.S. of A just to take a gander at this technological marvel built by S.T.A.R. Lab technologies. Obviously most of that had to do with the popularity of the Teen Titans themselves, but the Tower itself was just plain impressive as well, in both a technological and artistic sense.

"Yea dude, it totally gets the job done that's for sure." Beast Boy added. Spider-Man shot the green kid a look. _No, a small room in your Aunt's house 'gets the job done'. This… this is just sweet. _

"Heh, if you're impressed of the outside, just wait till you see the inside." Robin commented.

"Yep, a lot of hard work went into this baby." Beast Boy grinned, rubbing his gloved hands together with a sense of accomplishment.

Cyborg snickered. "Yea B. And you had nothing to do with it."

Beast Boy attempted to fire a witty comeback, but like that was gonna happen. "Well yea, you're… right. But hey! No one asked me to."

The most silent of the group, being Raven of course, spoke with a bit of irritation. "Can we go in now?"

Cue the mutual nodding.

"Oh yeah, good call Rae Rae. What were we thinkin'?" Cyborg quickly sent a digital signal into the Tower and the giant doors automatically opened.

"Man oh man oh man!" Cyborg admired the items in his boxed munchies in his arms. "Nothin' like fresh donuts out of the box baby, yes! That's the way! Uh huh uh huh! I like it! Uh huh uh huh!" The 'cyborg' grinned as he took a whiff of the five boxes of fried sweets. "You guys should've got some for yourselves ya'll, you're definitely missin' out."

Spider-Man eyed the boxes of grease and fat. "Yeah, on about thirty pounds."

The team broke out in a mused laugh.

"Hah! Thirty pounds. Good one." Beast Boy chuckled.

"Pretty funny." Cyborg pointed. "So a sense of humor huh? Man I think you're gonna fit right in around here. If the New York City you came from is even remotely similar to the one I know? You'll do fine. Say, is Hell's Kitchen, literally _Hell's Kitchen_ in your alternate universe?"

"Oh yeah. Definitely." Spidey nodded, noting the couple of times he's helped Daredevil around those much troubled parts.

Our crimson hero suddenly sighed as he was reminded yet again of how far away from home he was. The Tower had caught his attention for awhile but ultimately he was still a bit shaken and concerned about his current predicament. Sure the Titans have been more than friendly so far, and he was certain that they were a good bunch. But he had responsibilities back 'home' after all, and the sooner he could go back to his world the better.

It was only common sense… but then again this wasn't your 'common' kid either. Dealing with badly dealt cards was one of his strong points.

_Oh well, whining never gets you anywhere Pete. Who knows? Maybe a little downtime from the NYC is just what you need. These guys seem like a cool bunch. How does that saying go again? Oh yeah! Whenever life hands ya lemons, ya make lemonade right?_

Funny he thought that, because as we all know, this kid has been handed enough lemons to fill the Great Lakes with lemonade. And that is a damn fact!

_Besides better be positive and get your money's worth Spidey, because when you get back. You're so getting grounded._ With one last groan Spider-Man gave it his best to be positive and perked up with a new sense of optimism. The Titans noticed this in his strut as he didn't look like he was half a zombie anymore.

The teens had finally made their way inside, except for Raven who suddenly turned towards the beautiful city view across the Jump City bay. Robin also turned, always seeming to be the one noticing these little disturbances when it came to his teammates. One of the many reasons he was their leader mind you.

The Boy Wonder curiously glared. "Is there a problem?"

Raven sighed. "You mean besides the fact that we're letting a total stranger into our team hastily yet again, and not learning from our past mistakes?" she asked sarcastically. "Yea I guess you could say so."

"Heh, maybe we are, but if it's true that this guy had to deal with Larry and his antics. I think he deserves some slack." Robin countered, knowing first hand the headache that comes when dealing with the abomination known as Larry. "Anyway, what's the matter Raven? Are you getting bad vibes from _him_?"

Raven didn't turn and only shrugged. "Sad to say, but I'm not. He seems to be sincere."

"Then uh… what's the matter?"

Raven hesitated.

"I… don't know, but I am feeling something troublesome, although it's not from _him_. There's something or some 'things' out there that shouldn't be here."

There was a pause.

"Well Raven, whatever it is we'll be ready." Robin grinned. "We always are, remember?"

Raven just 'uh huh'd' him and then quickly made her way into the building while Robin stood a bit concerned at his friend's brief revelation. He ultimately shrugged and soon all six teens were inside the most prestigious base this side of the west coast, with of course Spider-Man actually finding something to look forward to for a change.

--

"Um, ya know guys. Maybe this guy… _is_ Larry?" Beast Boy suggested with a blank stare. Actually the whole Titans team was staring blankly. Anyone would really, at the rate Spider-Man was moving around, examining every nook and cranny of the Titans living room. Wall crawling… examining. Super jumping… examining. Back flipping… examining. Spider sprinting… examining. You get the picture don't ya?

This madness had to have gone on for about ten minutes as the self-proclaimed tech geek took his frantic gander around, totally psyched about what was in this tower of a 'teenagers dream'.

"Dude, ya gotta check out the clapper Cyborg just installed in the kitchen." Beast Boy hinted.

_A clapper? NO WAY!_

The arachnoid hesitantly clapped twice with a surplus of anticipation that would rival a toddler during Christmas Eve. The Titan's kitchen lights 'magically' came on. He repeated the claps a bit quicker this time and they went off. Spider-Man paused and grinned behind his mask like a devilish child. It was officially jingle time and the Titans gave BB a stern stare as they knew what was coming.

"Clap on!" (Clap, Clap!) "Clap off!" (Clap, Clap!) "Clap on! Clap off! The Clapper!" (Clap, Clap!)

Sweat drops to the floor galore.

"Sweet." was the only word Spidey muttered as he continued his self-exploration of Titans Tower.

"Well at least he's easily entertained." Raven muttered to the group as they continued to stare down a finally 'upbeat' Spider-Man.

"I told ya'll he'd fit right in." Cyborg added who was infamous for his simple tastes in life as well. This of course consisted of cars, women, and videogames mainly. But seriously folks! Aren't all teenage males like that? Oh please, don't lie to yourself guys!

Spider-Man gave the awesome room a good hard glare. "Man this is straight out of MTV Cribs or something." he suddenly grew puzzled. "So let me get this straight, you guys have this place, just because you guys are super heroes?"

"Uh, _just because_ we're super heroes?" Raven seemed insulted. Spidey quickly back pedaled. "Heh, sorry, I didn't mean it to sound that way. It's just that… where I come from, I hardly get this kind of… er… treatment."

Beast Boy went quirky eyed. "Wait, so how do ya get treated?" 

Spider-Man scratched his chin. "Like dirt, I guess."

Pause.

"Wait a sec. You save people's lives and they treat you like… 'dirt'?" Cyborg inquired, totally surprised.

"Uh yeah, like trash, like mildew, like cow dung, like dookie. Yep all those things, but I think 'like dirt' will do fine."

The Titans looked at one another, not understanding why or how something like that would occur. These five teens were literally idolized by their fellow Jump City citizens, and rightfully so. How could a hero be treated so lowly? Was he exaggerating? Of course we all know the answer to that one.

HELL NO!

"Friend Spider-Man, what does your dwelling resemble?" Starfire asked. Spidey, who was quite intrigued by this girl's elegant yet twisted English, was about to reply but almost felt ashamed at the truth; especially after seeing this wonderful complex known as Titans Tower.

He quickly looked for a way out of the question. "Uh, that's not important… but uh…"

Glancing… glancing… more glancing… and BINGO! He found it.

He slowly walked over to the large T.V. screen that clearly stood out most in the Titans living room, bringing everything to a screeching halt. The teen fell on his knees at the sheer beauty and size of this mega sized HD flat screen TV. "It's… too… beautiful… for… words…"

Beast Boy, Robin and Cyborg quickly joined him in admiring it. Cyborg muttered wide eyed. "She's a beauty ain't she?"

"Good times. Good times." Robin added.

"So many memories..." Beast Boy sighed, his green eyes being just as large as his two closest friends'. It truly was a glorious sight! The 'can't lose' combination of this leviathan of a T.V. and an in mint condition Gamestation XL 2000. Slap in a 'Joe knockoff Halo 2' Disc and it was a teenager's shrine to eternal bliss one could call it.

The four wiped their eyes as if a tear of utter appreciation had literally run down their faces. Starfire and Raven looked at one another with shrugs, still to this day not completely understanding their male teammates' urges to prove dominance through using pixilated robots to destroy one another.

"Hey I know we're having fun glaring and all, but before we set you lose Spidey we gotta register you with the people at S.T.A.R. Labs. So, you can go on payroll of course." Robin intervened.

"S.T.A.R. Labs huh? Hmmm they're not going to test me like some sorta lab rat are they?"

"They might." Raven informed, clearly with intentions to worry the newbie. Spider-Man became a bit alert, not too familiar with this girl's infamous cynicism just yet.

"No," Cyborg shot a look at Raven and turned back. "They won't."

The sorceress rolled her eyes.

Spider-Man suddenly realized Robin said the word 'payroll'. "HOLD UP! You get paid for being a super hero?"

"Well yea duh. How else are we supposed to survive?" Beast Boy retorted. Spider-Man shrugged. If the Titans only knew the feeling of trying to keep two jobs, having to go to school, and being a super-hero for 'free', they'd be bowing to this kid in red_. They get paid? And get this palace for free? Spidey, you're definitely living in the wrong universe. Oh yeah._

After about five minutes of Cyborg setting up an over the phone appointment, which consisted of being bumped around by the operator for a good four minutes, the half-droid finally succeeded. Spider-Man stood ready to be examined by a female S.T.A.R. lab representative over a satellite connection.

"_So let me guess here… you're from Dakota?"_

"Uh no. But just outta curiosity do you mean North Dakota? Or South Dakota?" Spider-Man suddenly remembered he wasn't in his 'universe'. "Or would it be East Dakota? Or maybe West Dakota? No! It's South-west Dakota isn't it? Or maybe-"

Thankfully Cyborg intervened (God bless his soul).

"He's from New York City." He interrupted. "But tell me. Why the heck would you think he's from Dakota?"

"_Well, whenever I see these whacked out colorful costumes, I always assume that. That city has some really funky dressed heroes that's for sure."_

"Hah, Static would love to hear that."

"_Heh, I'm sure he would."_

Spider-Man nodded slowly. "Oh so there's a Dakota 'City' now... figures… but HEY! Hold on a sec! What's wrong with my costume?"

Laughs from most of the Titans and the S.T.A.R. labs official were his only reply. After about ten more minutes of questioning that consisted of the basic 'How old are you?', 'Do you have any allergies?', and 'Aren't those Spider tights uncomfortable?' ultimately it came down to one more test. They wanted to see Spider-Man run through the gauntlet at least once, to see just how 'real of a deal' he was.

Oh yeah! The _gauntlet_! The Titans ultimate crime fighting training program! The same program Terra had to run through when she first became a Titan. The one where she broke the record, set by the teen that created it himself, Cyborg. But one has to also remember that she literally tore down the training structure as well. Would Spider-Man have a similar run through?

The Teen Titans would have to wait to find out because the 'When there's trouble you know who to call' beeping tone came off on all Titan communicators. Spider-Man put his hands at his waist feeling a bit left out. "Hey if I'm gonna be a 'Titan' don't I get to have one of those?"

"Sure you do, but you're forgetting one thing." Raven smirked. "You're not a Titan yet." The girl finished with the slightest hint of malice which Spider-Man easily sensed. _I guess someone's still bitter. I said I was sorry already. Sheesh. _

Robin looked towards Spider-Man. "Titan or not you're training on the job. We got trouble, it's Mumbo Jumbo."

"Aw man, not that blue geezer again." Cyborg sighed. Beast Boy also became a bit bummed. "Dude doesn't that guy ever run out of tricks? I mean you can only pull a rabbit out of a hat so many times ya know?"

"Do not be saddened friends! Let us stop the Mumbo Jumbo again!" Starfire cheered as she prepared to take off.

Spider-Man rubbed his chin. "Er… what's a 'Mumbo Gumbo'? Sounds kinda tastey."

There was a pause and the scene could be basically described with two words really…

'Blank stares'

Oh yea that's right. Just 'Blank Stares'

"Okay… uh… Titans uh… go?"

And the Titans were now officially off to the races!

( - Jump City's Most Popular Convenient Store - )

Alright who doesn't love magic tricks?

The answer is no one of course! They are just too fun and too entertaining! Oh you know it! From the simple 'pick a card any card' trick, to the more complex 'Siegfried and Roy white tiger on a unicycle' trick (Poor Roy) they all make our inner child laugh with glee.

But this certain magician, unlike David Copperfield, was one you wouldn't want to run into. That is, unless you wanted to be stripped of all of your belongings through the use of a vacuum like hat trick of course. You want a first hand testimonial to this? Just ask this poor convenient store clerk, who is tied from head to toe with magic ribbons over here. He was learning it the hard way obviously.

"Behold! I the great Mumbo Jumbo shall perform one last trick for your distinct pleasure." The blue skinned magician removed his hat and tapped it twice with his magical wand. "Hocus, POCUS!"

Suddenly the cash register to the 'Quik-E-Mart' convenient store shot open and the green began to pour into his hat like junk food into Cyborg's mouth. After about ten seconds of nonchalant whistling the 'trick' was complete and Mumbo swiftly placed his hat atop his head.

Ladies and gentlemen, you have just experienced the vacuum like hat trick. (Applause)

"Thank you, thank you, thank you! You have been a wonderful audience! The Amazing Mumbo must now take his leave. You've been too kind!" The magician quickly made his break for the exit but was stopped via the store door slamming into his face. The blow sent the 'great' Mumbo soaring back in a dazed heap. Two easily recognizable voices filled the room.

"Venom, come on! I've been dieing to know."

Sighs. "Well go 'semi-hero' and find out for yourself. We did for awhile and it wasn't all that bad."

"Me? Carnage? A semi-hero? BWAHA! Don't give me that crap daddy-o. Just tell me! How was it working with _her_?"

Even more sighs. "Remind us, because we've honestly been trying to channel your voice out the last hour. How was it working with 'who' again?"

Cassidy gave a blank stare. "HOW WAS IT WORKING WITH MRS. FANTASTIC GOD DAMMIT?"

"Oh right, her!" Venom nodded with a smile. "It was great. We thoroughly enjoyed kicking your ass along side her."

Carnage only scoffed at the memory. "Yea well, honestly? That girl can kick my ass anytime she wants to." his eyes turned into hearts. "Why oh why can't there be a girl just like her that would actually enjoy a good innocent decapitation here and there? Now that would be a dream date wouldn't it?"

"Um… yeah sure Carnage. Whatever."

With that funny look on his face, Carnage sighed as he slowly peered downward, noticing a certain magician's hat and wand.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa Brock. Well if it isn't my lucky day?"

"Well it certainly isn't ours." 

Cassidy made a grab for both of the items. He tossed the hat to Eddie. "Well, now it's you're lucky day."

Venom raised his brow at the hat. "Awesome, we can now die happily."

Carnage began waving the wand around like an orchestra conductor, chanting a 'devil's chant. "SUPER CALI FRAGILISTIC EXPEE ALLEY DOCIOUS! SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING ATROCIOUS!" he pointed the wand at Venom. Of course nothing happened and Carnage quickly grew angry.

"Dude this thing is just a piece of crap." Cassidy grabbed the wand and snapped it in half, tossing the remains outside the door.

"NOOOOO!"

The two symbiotes heard the scream and turned to look at a furious blue man, who was now actually a bit 'red'. "You fools! That was my wand!"

Carnage and Venom looked at one another with a shrug. They then glanced back at the one and only Mumbo Jumbo. Cassidy smirked. "Well I guess now you have two wands."

"Why you little-" Mumbo scolded but remembered he had more important business to attend to then to mess with two 'kids'. He quickly turned towards the teenage Brock who was holding his still in one piece hat. "Now be a dear boy and hand over the hat, and I'll let you two kids run along. You're wasting my time."

Eddie only laughed. "Sorry 'blue', but finders keepers, losers weepers."

Cassidy scoffed. "Man you must buy a lot of tissues eh?" 

The two disguised symbiotic teens hooted at Mumbo who began to give an even more intense shade of red. "Do you brats know who you're dealing with?"

The two neo-teens suddenly struck a thinking pose. They mockingly stood in the pause for about half a minute. "OH I KNOW-I KNOW-I KNOW-I KNOW!"

All ears were with Carnage.

"You're POPPA SMURF!"

Venom began to point and stutter. "Holy shit. It is! This is smurfin' fantastic!" the older symbiote mocked. "You all look so much smaller on T.V."

The teens laughed their heads off as Mumbo had just about enough. "Give me that!" The magician made a grab at his hat but Venom pulled it away. "Now come on. Let's be reasonable shall 'we'? By law this hat is now ours isn't it? But we'll be a nice symbiote today! Why don't we share it?"

Venom then literally tore the hat right down the middle and handed half of it to Mumbo who was boiling angry. Carnage noticed the man's irate look. "Aw come on blue, it's not the hat or the wand that makes a magician."

Mumbo scowled. "The great Mumbo Jumbo will not be lectured on 'magic' by some snot nosed kid. Besides what do you know about magic?"

The two symbiotes paused trying to come to grips that someone would actually name themselves 'Mumbo Jumbo'. Ultimately they shrugged and Carnage continued. "Oh come on! Don't judge a book by its cover. Behind this handsome face is a magician waiting to be unlocked. Wanna see?"

"Hah!" The blue skin man was totally intrigued and besides himself in laughter. "Fine, let us see a trick. This oughta be good."

Carnage looked at Venom who motioned with his hands that the stage was his. Cassidy cracked his knuckles and rubbed his hands together. "Alright! The great Cletus Cassidy will now perform his signature trick called… er… 'The great Cletus Cassidy's signature trick'. Basically I will make you disappear, my blue friend."

"Hah! You're going to make me disappear?"

"That's right." Carnage began to wiggle his fingers as he pointed them at Mumbo who was only staring in amusement at the mocking magician. Cassidy's hands suddenly exploded towards the blue skin man. "ALAKABOOM!"

To no surprise nothing happened which made Mumbo laugh hysterically. "Leave the magic to us real magicians kid. And by the way it's not 'Alakaboom', it's 'Alakazam' ya nitwit."

Carnage raised a brow. "Really? Wow, I could've sworn it was Alakaboom. Let's give it another shot shall we?" The symbiote got back into his 'mocking stance'. "Alaka-"

Suddenly a red tendril shot out of Cassidy's hand and slammed into Mumbo sending him on a wild ride across the room. Eventually the blue man met the wall making a noise that certainly brought some 'glee' into Carnage's system.

_**BOOM!**_

"Dude, I totally knew it!" Carnage laughed as he had just K.O'd Mumbo Jumbo.

"Well now if we don't gotta natural Houdini on our hands." Venom mocked.

"Damn straight we do."

"Oh please. That was a mediocre trick."

Carnage snickered. "Well I was going to do that whole 'saw the assistant in half and put the assistant back together again' trick, but it would have been against my nature to do that second part, if ya know what I mean."

"Point taken." Venom chuckled as the boy in black made his way over to the machine that these two symbiotes have been searching of for the past half hour. Carnage followed and the two began to stare at their 'quest item' in such awe that you would swear they were staring at the Ring of Power and they themselves were the 'Fellowship'.

It was the always infamous!

SLURPIE MACHINE!

The two symbiotes looked at one another and grinned as to them they had just found heaven. They looked at one another and grinned.

"CHA-CHING!"

( - Ten Minutes Later - )

The Titans quickly filed into the parking lot of the Quik-E-Mart led by of course Robin, who took a look at the relatively calm surroundings. It was unusual to say the least, especially because the Titans knew how big of a loud mouth Mumbo was.

"Uh, where's Mumbo?"

"He's probably still inside." Cyborg answered. Just then two boys, in their early teens, walked out the convenient store completely wide eyed. The Titans peered over to that direction with confused faces. The boys began to speak to one another.

"Uh… Kale… did you just see what I saw?" The black haired boy muttered blankly. The brown haired one spoke just as zombie-ishly. "I think so Orion, I think so…"

The two then suddenly screamed. "NOOOOOO!"

The Titans quickly rushed over to the distraught boys who were now on the floor looking to the sky as if God himself had forsaken them.

"What happened?" Robin asked. The two just shook their heads. "It's too awful… too awful…" they muttered.

Robin turned to the rest of the Titans. "Guys, we better be careful. We don't-"

Suddenly the door to the convenient store shot open as our favorite arachnid hero shot into the store, apparently this guy was still used to being the 'solo-act'. He ran into the store. "Alright whoever you… WHOA!"

**_CRAAAAAAASH!_ **

"Uh that doesn't sound too good." Beast Boy commented as the rest of the Titans carefully made their way into the store. Robin busted the door open with a kick and the Titans couldn't help but jaw drop at what they saw.

Spider-Man was on the floor totally laid out and covered with cans of Pepsi cola. He rubbed his head as he lifted himself into a seated position. Cyborg started to tremble. "Is that melted Slurpie all over the floor?"

GASPS!

The half-droid then took a gander over at the Slushie machine in the corner and his eyes doubled in size. "What… kind… of… monster… would… do… this?" he asked, being way too dramatic if you'd ask any of the other Titans.

Spider-Man gave an "Ugh." as his costume was totally soaked. "Darn, that'll leave a stain." he commented as he pulled at his suit.

"And that is why Robin is the one that usually leads us in." Beast Boy snickered. Spider-Man nodded with a half-assed thumbs up, "Yea, I'm really not used to this whole 'team' concept thing yet."

The Titans then suddenly heard a groan from across the room and took note of the huge hole in the wall that had been created. Raven quickly phased over to take a peak. "Well I think I found Mumbo… or at least parts of Mumbo."

The Titans made their way over.

"Um, the Mumbo looks extremely hurt, we should aid him." Starfire stated with concern.

Robin scowled. "I guess someone got to him first. We better get an ambulance over here, he doesn't look too good."

"Man! We don't need an ambulance! We need a Slurpie machine repair man!" Cyborg yelled. He was justly ignored.

The Titans looked over Mumbo with a look of pity on their faces. Beast Boy gave a 'whoa' type look at the hole in the wall. "Dudes, who did this?"

"A monster I tell you, a psychotic monster." Cyborg muttered, _still _crying over the now defunct Slurpie machine. "Don't worry I'll fix you baby, we have had way too many good times together. Don't leave me now!" The half-droid hugged the machine in a consoling type manner.

"The guy really loves his slushies doesn't he?" Spider-Man asked.

"You don't even want to know." Raven replied. The always crime fighting minded Robin rubbed his chin with his gloved hand. "Who could've done this?"

Spider-Man scowled. _Hmm, hopefully it's not who I think it is… I wonder what Venom and Carnage. Are they even here? _

"Who knows? Maybe there's new heroes in town or something." Beast Boy said as he stretched. Raven scowled. "I highly doubt that."

"Yea, a hero wouldn't have done this B! No way!"

Beast Boy sighed. "Oh God, Cy will you get away from the Slurpie machine already?" Cyborg reluctantly complied walking over to his teammates with his head hung low. Obviously he was taking this way too hard, but we all know about grieving... it's a process no matter how inane the cause of it is.

Robin disregarded all the hoopla and brought some focus back to the group. "Well team, I guess our job here is uh… done. Let's regroup at the tower and try to get to the bottom of this."

"Alright Robin. That sounds super but uh…" Spider-Man took a glance at his soaked costume. "When we get back, I gotta change into my-"

The beauty of epiphanies cannot be described better than how Spider-Man did it. "Oh boy."

"What is the problem friend?" Starfire asked.

"Well I uh don't have any spare costumes with me, and call me crazy but I really don't wanna be marinated in Cherry slurpie for too long ya know? Five minutes is okay, but I don't think I can take much more than that."

"Good point." Cyborg replied. The team was silent, but Starfire quickly had an idea. "Friends! Why not we all go to the Mall of Shopping so friend Spider-Man can choose different attires?"

"Sounds like an awesome plan to me." Beast Boy said with a nod. Robin gave a questioning glare. "I don't know guys,"

Starfire, Cyborg, and Beast Boy became wide-eyed and squealed the word. "Puhlleeeeeeeeeeeze?"

Robin sighed in defeat. "I guess a little stop wouldn't hurt 'too' much."

Spider-Man shrugged. "I hope this isn't too much trouble."

"Do not worry friend Spider-Man. I will aid you in your selection! We will be having the 'grandest of times'." Starfire said happily as she took the web head by the wrist to drag him out of the store. 

"For some reason… I highly doubt that." Spidey muttered worryingly as he was being forced to be Starfire's Ken doll for the day.

"You know I almost feel sorry for him." Raven commented.

Robin, Beast Boy, and Cyborg couldn't stop laughing as they quickly followed, not wanting to miss out on the fun. Of course Raven was the last one out. She took a quick look around getting the bad same vibes she did awhile ago. "Who did this?" she scowled.

( - Downtown Jump City - )

Venom and Carnage sat literally hunched over and limp on a street curb, which was littered with cups and cups and cups and cups of empty and half-empty Slurpie remains. The two literally looked sick to their stomachs and Cassidy attempted to get up only to grab at his head.

"Ow."

"What?" Venom asked as he was on his furious decent from his 'sugar high'.

"This is wicked… and I mean wicked… BRAIN FREEEEEEZE!" Cassidy screamed as he shook his head wildly. Venom clutched at his stomach. "Please don't mention 'food' to us right now."

Ah yes, 'Brain Freeze'. A symbiote's favorite frozen dessert.

Venom and Carnage slumped over clearly over 'Slurpied'. A voice suddenly shot out to the two teens.

"Looks like you two need assistance."

The half-dazed symbiotes just groaned as they slowly got up. Venom rubbed his head, forcing himself into a state of concentration. "And who the hell are you?"

"You can call me a friend."

"Hmm, why don't I just call you my next victim?" Carnage shot as he lifted his face off the ground to join his 'dad', still reeling off his slurpie binge. The voice laughed.

"Intensity, I like it! I can sense the emotions needed to be great killers in the both of you." The owner of the voice turned to Carnage. "And that horrific transformation you pulled back awhile ago. I must say I am impressed."

Carnage and Venom looked at one another with a shrug. "What do you want?"

"The potential in the two of you is limitless, I can feel it. You both can be molded into quite the villains."

"Sorry old man but we're already quite the villain." Venom bragged clearly talking only about himself, which made Carnage a bit perturbed. Of course the person speaking to them couldn't catch the 'detail'.

"I see. Well allow me to introduce myself anyway. The name is Blood." The white haired man smiled. "Brother Blood."

Carnage slowly nodded. "Well my name is Bond. James Bond." The two symbiotes laughed but quickly clutched their heads from post stinging brain freeze.

Brother Blood shrugged. "Let's cut to the chase shall we? I own a 'school' for gifted teens, just like yourselves. It is a school that can teach you the ways to becoming the perfect villain. Preparing you for any problem the 'noble' ones could give you."

Pause.

"A school huh? And let us guess. You want us to join this school of yours we are assuming?" Venom asked.

"Perceptive."

"Sorry, but we're not interested. School is totally not cool." Carnage replied.

"Hah, this isn't like any school my friends. Here," Brother Blood quickly reached behind his robe and pulled out a 'brochure'. "Read this." Venom and Carnage shrugged as the man handed it to them. Carnage took it and began looking over it.

"The H –I–V –E?" Carnage asked as he glanced at the cover. "This doesn't have anything to do with the Y M C A does it?"

(IT'S FUN TO STAY AT THE H I V E! IT'S FUN TO STAY AT THE H I V E HE!)

Venom and Carnage gave worried looks at the thought of that. Blood scowled, getting a bit perturbed by their idiocy. "No."

The two symbiotes sighed in relief as they went down the list. Carnage's eyes grew a bit wide. "Whoa wait a second here, we get all this!"

Brother Blood nodded.

"A video arcade, your own room, free food, target practice dummies and a fifty dollar gift certificate to Evil R Us!" Carnage extended a hand. "Dude screw it. I'm in."

Venom quickly batted his offspring's hand away. "Hold on. What's in this for you?"

Blood smiled. "Why you'd be under my supervision of course. You'll have to obey my orders and show up to class. Simple really."

"Hah, sorry old man, but we're no one's pawn."

"But Brock there's a freakin' weight room!"

Eddie paused. "Holy crap really?"

Brother Blood smiled as his eyes began to give a red glow. Venom suddenly grew a bit alert as he felt something in his mind click. The symbiote quickly shrugged it off. _Wait was that? Yes… yes it was a mind trick. Hmm if it weren't for the symbiote Brock's mind would've been at his mercy. Wel what do ya know? Maybe we can learn a few new tricks after all._

Venom slowly nodded playing along. "Actually the weight room does sound good. And it did say free food right?"

"No freakin' shit it does. But who cares about that crap? We get our own dorm rooms man! Totally boss. We're definitely taking the offer." Carnage pranced. Brother Blood smiled. "Excellent. But before you two can join, you both are going to have to pull a job to prove your worth. I am confident you two will get it done."

The symbiotes then did something that they usually never did. They listened attentively.

"I have _three_ students that need to be freed from prison." Blood handed Venom a piece of paper with the information needed for the mission.

Carnage scoffed. "Prison huh? Why does that word always seem to hit home with me?"

"You two will strike tonight and when you succeed? You will be invited to become part of the most prestigious school of villains in the world. The H.I.V.E."

The two symbiotes snickered as they were definitely familiar with Jail breaks. The two began to telepathically speak to one another via the alien suits.

"_This is perfect! We can use this hidden base of his as a hiding spot till we decide to pounce on Spider-Man."_

"_Oh right… but who gives a flying hoot? We get our own dorm rooms man! Woohoo!"_

"_(Sigh)"_

"_What?"_

"_You know… you… you… Grr, you should just shut the hell up."_

Throat clear. "So you now know my name. I would like the same from you."

The two symbiotes grinned.

"Venom."

"Carnage."

Blood laughed. "Hmmm, strong names. I only hope you two can live up to those names."

Venom and Carnage only snickered at the comment because they knew if one would ask any being who has had to deal with these two particular freaks of nature. They would know how true to their names they were. 

Jump City was in trouble people, oh yes it freakin' was!


	4. Jailbreaks and Makeovers! Oh My!

Deep in the pits of the not so purdy southern sector of Jump City laid Ashrum Meta-Penitentiary. It was a prison obviously. But this is not any ol' prison mind you! Come on, seriously. Why would we be talking about it if it was? For fun? Duh! Of course this wouldn't be 'Joe grand daddy's' prison! And this isn't just some kicked up Alcatraz either.

Hell no. This was _the_ prison of Jump City! _The_ prison!

This was a prison built to house the most infamous super villains this psychedelic bay side city had to offer. This was a security complex built to secure the most potent of metahumans, rendering all of their powers and abilities in any shape or form to be plainly useless. Bottom line kiddies? This was one bad ass jailing facility. Indubitably!

And through the use of the finest in military defensive technology such as splendid laser-tech weaponry, sophisticated camera systems, 'need a PHD in astrophysics to understand' anti-psychic force barriers, and adamantium reinforced cells to name a few - the Jump City government have made it a very intricate task for any type of escape. Looking at that list, it would seem impossible really. Impossible I say! Impossible! (Cough... BS... cough)

Now as thinking humans we all know nothing is 'impossible'. But one would really have to find it unusual yet kind of amusing how every villain the Teen Titans have managed to bring to justice have mysteriously found a way to escape. Even the totally out of shape couch potato known as Control Freak has had his fair share of successes with escaping. There's a confidence booster for public safety huh?

But in all seriousness boys and girls, how would this happen you say? How could this be? Why was it so easy for these villains to escape even with all this technology in the governments grasp?

Well, your answer is a simple but like always a harsh one.

Jump City plainly had a useless security force. Yea you heard it right.

USELESS!

The ads for the jobs say it all. 'Do you live in Jump City and want a job where you're used as a meat shield until the Titans arrive? Join the JCPD! No experience needed. The perks are awesome! You get a cool armor-suited uniform including a hi-tech mask and a laser blaster. Have a ball!'

Of course if one should read the small print (Which apparently no one does) it states 'Discretion advised, must not have a glass chin, and a high threshold of pain is highly recommended.'

These poor JCPD coppers, they should've really read in detail. Because as bad as these guys have had it all these years? Two maniacal murderers from another dimension were about to crash the party. And they brought a whole new level of tormenting tactics with them. These were no 'Adonis' or 'Chang' type villains either. These two put the 'super' in super-villain and they were best at what they did! Oh and what did they do exactly? Well they inflicted pain. And as the crimson one of the two would put it 'Pain in all shapes and colors baby! Woohoo!'

Oh joy! It seems we've made it just in time to see a jail break for the ages! So let's pass that buttered popcorn and join in shall we?

"Aaaaaagh!" 

The sound of suffering… music to a symbiote's ears.

The scream echoed down to the instantly alert front desk security officer. He made a rapid dash to the source of the scream, turning down the twisted hallways of the entrance sector of the prison. The JCPD guard decked out in the usual armored attire and laser gun the JCPD techies supplied stood ready to deal with the worse case scenario, or so he thought. He slowed his pace as he was nearing his desired destination. He crept with his laser armed and ready to fire.

He slowly turned the last corner in a hesitant motion and behold! He gasped at what he saw, because there laid two of his comrades, face down on the floor groaning, seeming to have been incapacitated by someone . . or as we all know some 'things'. He quickly ran over to them and flipped one of his fellow guards over. The downed guard made a desperate grab at him pulling the concerned JCPD officer nearer to his masked face.

"Dude, I'm seeing the light …" The JCPD guard breathed heavily. "I'm not gonna make it. Please, tell my family that I… that I…"

The security officer awaited his comrade's dieing words. But apparently, he wasn't going to get them. Yep, he definitely wasn't going to get them. Because obviously! This 'dieing' security guard wasn't actually er… dieing.

"HAHAHAHAHA!" The 'dieing' guard laughed as he shoved the on edge officer back forcibly. The other 'downed' guard also began laughing. The two started to finger-point at their 'rescuer' and mocked.

"Dude, you musta pissed your pants!" The one that pulled the academy award job teased. The other only laughed along in a mocking tone with his arms crossed. The 'prankee' was obviously ticked off.

"You think that was freaking funny?"

Childish nods.

"Well THAT was not funny asshole!"

The two pranksters only replied with an indifferent shrug.

"Somebody has a stick up the rear today eh?" The 'joker' turned. "Hey Eddie, he doesn't look too amused."

"Nope," A disguised Venom snickered. "We think you better tell him a joke. Ya know, just to make amends."

Obviously the other, being Carnage, jumped on that idea. "Whoa! Not a bad muse pops. Not bad at all!"

Decked out in JCPD uniforms the two symbiotes chuckled at the thought of their usual _mischief_ they were about to unleash on this prison. Carnage slid over to the security guard and extended his hand.

"Alright man, I'm sorry. That joke wasn't funny at all. My apologies," The guard looked at the gloved hand and took the handshake reluctantly. Cassidy smiled behind his visor equipped mask. "But let me make it up to ya! Wanna hear a real joke?"

"Sure," The guard nodded with hesitation. "I guess."

Carnage chuckled evilly from within. "Okay. Did you ever hear about the security guard without a sense of humor?"

"No I haven't,"

"Of course you haven't!" The symbiote then suddenly morphed his hand into a blade and slammed the weapon into the guard's chest. The blade went through as clean as a whistle and Carnage approved every second of it. The masked officer looked at the weapon in shock and slowly turned his head back to his joyful murderer.

"I've killed them all." Carnage informed with a snicker. The officer breathed his last as he collapsed to the floor. Cassidy nonchalantly forced his symbiotic blade out of the corpse with a pull against his pivoted foot. He looked over towards Venom with a crazed laugh. "Now THAT was funny!"

Carnage suddenly broke out in a small victory jig that honestly resembled something out of 'The Lord of The Dance'. Of course all the while chanting his usual 'I'm bad! I'm bad! Oh yeah! I'm bad!'

Venom 'uuh'd' but ultimately shrugged off Carnage's infamous love for 'crazy'. He scratched his masked head. "It was funny, but we don't think he heard that last part."

Carnage scoffed as he raised his bloodied blade against his face. "Ah well, I think he got the _point_."

"Now there's a punch line." Venom suddenly tilted his head walking over to the corpse and examining it. "Hmmm," he obviously found something worth noting. And judging by his chuckling, it was something 'really' worth noting. He reached down towards the officer's neck.

"Oh 'my' God,"

Carnage quickly grew a bit skewed. "What?"

Venom didn't answer as he forcibly ripped something off the body. He tossed the object to Carnage who caught it with his un-morphed hand. It was apparently a dog tag of some sort. And in an unusual turn of events the serial killer was in a rare state of being… he was plainly speechless.

Venom drilled the name on the tag into his mind vocally.

"You killed Kenny."

There was a pause. "No freakin' way," Carnage muttered as he confirmed the name on the dog tag as 'Kenny'. Venom pointed at him and screamed words that brought it full circle.

"YOU BASTARD!"

There was an awkward pause… but obviously it was short lived.

"BWAHAHAHAHA!" The two symbiotes laughed their crazed laughs simultaneously, letting the sounds of their cackling echo throughout the prison complex.

"Hah! I killed Kenny!" Carnage celebrated by banging his head up and down like a fan that had one too many drinks at a Metallica concert. Venom, being the more sensible of the two (though that's not saying much), slowly stood and began to listen in on his surroundings.

"Yo pops I never knew all this stealth stuff was so cool. These disguises, killing people out of no-where and smoking cigarettes makes me feel so… Solid Snake."

"Well," Venom suddenly enlarged his right eye. "Wait, you smoke?"

"No," Carnage laughed. "But it would be cool though wouldn't it?" 

Venom scowled in annoyance.

"Oh come on dad! I mean it makes Wolverine look totally badass! And he's a freakin' goodie goodie for God sakes." 

Venom was about to retort with another one of his insults but stopped abruptly. He slowly broke a smile behind his mimic JCPD helmet.

"Well, well, well looks like we got company." As on cue hoards of foots steps were heard as a group of ten security guards made their way into the room. They looked at the down soldier and then back towards our two fav symbiotes.

"Hey! More victims?" Carnage appreciated. "This city just keeps on giving doesn't it?"

The guards quickly took aim at the two fakes and stood with lasers ready to fire. "Alright nobody move and no one gets hurt!"

The two only chuckled. "No one gets hurt?" Carnage teasingly moped. "Now where's the fun in that fellas?"

"We think these guys need a little sunshine in their lives." Venom grinned. "Why not brighten up their day with a joke?"

Carnage nodded in agreement and looked at his victims with a blood thirsty scowl. "Hey guys, wanna hear a joke?"

( - Fifteen Bloody Minutes Later - )

There's a lot of cool ways to open an electric powered door. Like detonation, hacking, bashing, or turning the knob for instance. All are effective, yes. But our buddy Venom just happened to be one of those villains that preferred throwing bodies through them. Hey, whatever works eh? Sure! And boy does it ever work.

The metal reinforced door was forced open by a soaring JCPD officer at break neck speed. The officer fell to the ground like a beaten rag doll. Venom wasn't too far behind and peered into the room with boredom. He made his slow strut over the dead officer's body.

"Aw, don't bother getting up on our account." Venom smiled as he took a glance around realizing he had just found the correct cellblock. A pitiful scream could be heard down the hallway and Venom turned to see another gored body soaring into the room. 

"Nice distance."

Carnage joined. "Gee thanks, that slurpie stuff just gets you going doesn't it?"

Venom scanned at the many doors inside this large cellblock. Apparently they were all adamantium reinforced, having inscribed numbers and 'names' to the right of the cells. Finding the three students Brother Blood wanted was going to be more tedious than once thought. Nothing worse than lazy symbiotes…

"I like this place." Carnage admired. "Quaint! It's no Ravencroft though."

"Just shut up and hand us that list." Venom extended his hand. Cassidy dug into his uniform pockets and pulled out a sheet of paper, handing it over with a light mischievous chuckle. Venom grabbed it and took a look.

"Okay let's see, first name… Seymour Butts."

Venom began walking down the room searching for the 'name' but suddenly stopped in a horrid realization. _Wait a sec… Seymour Butts? _He quickly peeled his eyes off the wall in a drone like fashion and crushed the paper in his hand. Carnage started to laugh uncontrollably and mockingly as he slapped his thigh. "Haha! Seymour Butts huh Venom? Gee Golly! Let's go find him dad!"

Venom angrily tossed the paper at Carnage. "JUST HAND US THE PAPER!"

"Alright sheesh. Someone can't take being the 'butt' of a joke eh?" Carnage reached in his pocket all the while mumbling 'Seymour Butts, hah, I'm too good.' The thinner teen found it and Venom quickly ripped it out of his hands. 

"Alright you take the right side, we'll take the left." The symbiotes then made their way up and down the room searching for three certain names. The names of course being:

Jinx, Gizmo, and Mammoth

Carnage slowly glared down the inscribed names on the walls passing handles such as Mad Mod, Killer Moth, Johnny Rancid, and Fang. He shrugged at the pure lameness and finally found his first target… it was Gizmo. Our Gizmo!

"Yo dad I found one!"

"Congratulations! Now go kick yourself in the ass!"

"JEALOUS!" Carnage replied as he quickly morphed his hand into a blob of goop. He slammed the red goop into the crevasses of the door and in seconds the allegedly 'indestructible' metal snapped as if it was made of styrofoam. He slowly peered inside and stared at what he had found. Yep, he stared at all three feet of it.

"What the freaking hell?"

Carnage glared at the 'questioner' inside and enlarged his eyes thrice the size of his norm. "Holy shit Venom." His mouth dropped, "It's a talking baby!"

The 'baby' in the orange prisoner's jumpsuit scowled. "Who you calling a baby? You sludge eattin'-shoe lickin'-dookie lovin'-booger bashin'-pit sniffin' CLUDGE HEAD!"

Carnage felt a bit dazed from that rapid verbal onslaught, not even sure if he had actually been insulted yet. He shook his head and tilted it at Gizmo. "I'm a _what_ again?"

"Uh, you found a talking baby huh?" Carnage slowly turned and Venom chuckled. "We've apparently found a talking monkey."

The 'monkey' with the soul patch jumped into their convo. "Gizmo! Dude! We're free!"

Venom and Carnage watched on behind their disguises as the talking 'Monkey' and 'Baby' gave each other a high five.

"Whoa! Nice cell." Mammoth complimented with his raspy voice. "But hey! How come you got a radio?"

Gizmo took a glance at the item in question and scoffed. "Oh, one of the female coppers thought I was 'cute' and gave me a radio. It's crap though! I couldn't get any reception or anything, well except for that lame-ass Kumbaya 24/7 station." he looked to the ground in a grumble. "That bumbling bitch got me to 'goo goo gaa gaa' for it too."

Mammoth started to laugh uncontrollably.

Carnage and Venom mutually shrugged in a silent way of saying 'Right'. The two newly freed villains stopped their antics and glared at their rescuers with confused looks. Gizmo pointed. "So, what are you two? Some freakin' crooked coppers?"

"Yeah, why'd you free us?"

Venom growled. "Why don't you two stop asking so many damn questions and get back to H.I.V.E. Headquarters. Mr. Blood is waiting for you."

"Sweet, I knew the old man couldn't do his dirty work without us." Gizmo exclaimed proudly.

"Wait," Mammoth paused. "Not without Jinx we're not."

"Jinx huh?" Carnage yelled from across the room. The three turned. Apparently our Cassidy had invaded another cell. Mammoth and Gizmo quickly took off and Venom followed. 

"Cute name," Carnage muttered. Gizmo and Mammoth smiled at Jinx who was looking around in a confused manner.

The H.I.V.E. trio has been officially reunited!

"Um, how are you two free?" Jinx asked with a brow raise.

They simply pointed at Carnage who was plainly examining Jinx like she was some sort of kitty cat. Venom finally made his way into Jinx's cell and took a gander at the young gray skinned female who was in some complex looking straight jacket. Her cell walls were different than Gimzo's and Mammoth's as they were rubber padded. Apparently this girl was a lot more dangerous than the other two and Carnage took notice as he glared at her pink hair.

"Hmmm, you got a crazy pink hair-do that I just adore! A straight jacket that looked way cooler than mine! Awesome cat eyes! Gray skin! And you live in a rubber room? Oh jeez," Carnage's JCPD helmet was right in Jinx's face at this point.

"I think we're going to get along great!"

Sweat drop.

"Yeeah," Jinx let out a sigh and looked towards the symbiotes then back to her teammates. Carnage suddenly morphed his finger into a blade and cut a slit down the straight jacket freeing her. She glared at this 'security guard's' metahuman type display in amazement. Apparently there was more than met her pink cat eyes.

She shrugged and slowly stood, stretching her arms, basking in her newfound freedom. Jinx let a crackle of pink energy shoot from her fingertips and smiled evilly. Apparently that 'special' straight jacket was saved for magicians. "Okay, what's going on?

Mammoth began opening his large mouth but was interrupted.

"Enough of this chat crap. We're blowin' this joint." Venom muttered as he exited. Carnage looked at the three and laughed.

"Forgive Venom. He's what I like to call a," he scratched his chin and spoke in an overly kind manner. "Well a jackass. But hey! He'll grow on you!"

"I'm sure," Jinx doubted. Carnage nodded and exited.

"Who the hell are these guys?" Mammoth questioned.

Gizmo scoffed, "Apparently new H.I.V.E. recruits dumbass."

Jinx raised a brow. "Hmph, apparently they're good." she pondered. "… maybe too good even."

The three H.I.V.E. agents gave each other questioning glares but ultimately followed. From outside Carnage quickly grabbed Venom and pulled him to the side. 

"Hey,"

"What?"

"That 'Jinx'," Carnage snickered. "I think she's pretty cute."

"So we've noticed."

"Oh and by the way, I got an idea."

Venom scowled. "If this has anything to do with splitting their heads open and eating their brains, we will be doing the same to you."

"Well alrighty then there goes plan A, but I gotta plan B!" Carnage cackled ignoring the more or less 'empty' threat. "Why don't we release all of these prisoners? As former prisoners it's our duty to get these guys outta here. It's my code."

"Code?" Venom mocked. "Since when did a psychopath like you have ethics?"

"Heh, as long as people get hurt, it's fine by me."

"Fine," Venom paused. "You do have a point." Brock only shuttered at the thought of saying such blasphemy.

"Yep, the more anarchy the merrier I say!"

"Whoa, whoever you are," Mammoth grinned. "I like your style."

"Oh yeah, I get that a lot." Carnage replied. Gizmo snickered as he gave him the finger. "Probably get this a lot too."

Carnage nodded. "And that," Gizmo laughed. Cassidy smirked. "But the ones that do it usually don't have heads by the time they're done laughing."

Carnage's signature blade formed and the laughing stopped abruptly. Gizmo gave a nervous 'heh'. Jinx only giggled watching her small friend deflate as Venom turned to the H.I.V.E. trio and pointed towards another cell door.

"Alright kiddies, we're gonna play a little game called 'Jail Break'."

Mischievous grins.

( - Jump City Mall of America: An Hour Later - )

Okay smarty pants, here's a question for ya. What do Eddie Van Halen, Michael Jordan, Halle Berry, and Batman all have in common? 

(Jeopardy Music)

Hmm, they live in the same city you say? Nope. They all have dogs? Nope. They all love cheese? Nope. They all prefer Coke over Pepsi? Nope. Their zip codes all have the same amount of numbers? Well yeah, but that's not the answer.

Give up? 

Sure ya do.

Well silly, they're all considered _virtuosos_ by their peers. Yes a virtuoso! Someone who is dazzlingly skilled at any field! And boy were these people skilled at their respective fields! You got Eddie Van Halen, a rock guitar god. You got Michael Jordan, the king of the hardwood. Halle Berry, the goddess of the big screen. And Batman, the Dark Knight! Master detective! Yes, these were people that were the best at what they did, and their peers knew this all too well.

Hmm does this blabbering have a point you must be thinking? 

Of course!

Presently in this certain mall, there was also a virtuoso walking in its friendly confines. She was the master of the 'shop till you drop' shuffle! The queen of crashing the shopping scene! The princess of mall time madness! Of course you all know who it is!

It was our oh so lovable Starfire!

Everyone in Jump City knew of this. Hell the Titans knew this all too well. Although sadly for Spider-Man, this kid had no idea what he was getting himself into. He came into this 'shopping thing' with little worries. In all his months of fighting crime this kid should've been ready for the worst after all. But what he was facing at this point was just too much to bear, even for a super human. Starfire's onslaught of cutesy and adorable department stores would take down the strongest of men. Just ask Robin.

Poor Spidey! Currently, he was in one of those changing rooms, indirectly being forced to be Starfire's dress up doll for the day. Why not just refuse you ask? Hah, easier said than done! Even the harshest of souls would find it hard to disappoint Starfire. Yes, including total strangers. The girl's sickening gift of 'perk', innocent air headedness, and that all out honest to kindness demeanor would drive men to do the wildest of things. Not to mention her absolutely adorable looks.

But even considering all that, it also didn't help that Spidey didn't want to get off on the wrong foot with these super teens that took him in. Because he truly didn't have anywhere else to go! So all things considered, here we stand with our favorite arachnoid staring at himself in the mirror. One could only imagine the facial expression behind his red mask as he looked at his attire. _"Oh God"_ would be an appropriate statement to describe this scene.

Spider-Man twitched a bit as he hardened his stare. Just how the hell did he get into this ensemble of clothing? An exited voice shouted out from the waiting room. "Friend please! We have no time to waste! We must make use of our time to fulfill our quest! There are numerous remaining shops we must visit! Let us see how you have turned out!"

Spider-Man slowly shook his head and gulped as he walked out of the door. He crept slowly yet cautiously until he was in the view of two emerald eyes that widened at the very sight of him.

"Oh you look so cuuute!" She clapped as she ran over to him and straightened out his attire. Spider-Man sighed underneath his mask. _Spidey you are such a poon._

The lady manager who had locked down the store for these teenage superheroes couldn't help but chuckle. "Interesting look, very 'obscure'"

Spider-Man blushed under his mask as he glared to the ground. In all his years of fighting crime, never had he been so embarrassed and 'eyeballed'. This sort of attention made Black Cat look like she didn't even notice him, and we all know how flirty that girl can be, especially with Spidey. Starfire smiled her usual grand way.

"Do you approve friend?"

Spider-Man looked at the many mirrors and turned back at Starfire with a sigh, "Can I say no?"

"Do not be silly! You must truly take a good look! You look wonderful!" Starfire giggled as she turned. "You agree Raven, yes?"

Hmm, it seems that Raven was in the room as well! And as usual her eyes were buried in a thick book. She decided it was best to stay with Starfire and Spider-Man apparently. Her choices weren't all that great. It was either watch the Titan boys kill their time bashing buttons on an arcade game while waving off countless guys that hit on her or stay in a quiet place so that she could read.

Decisions, decisions, decisions right?

The sorceress slowly peered upward and her jaw literally dropped at what she saw. And what she 'saw' would bring the most in-humored beings to a hysterical laugh. Raven was flabbergasted. The mask Spider-Man was wearing was still there but it was what below it that brought the chuckles.

Check this folks. Picture a hot pink shirt with the words 'Real Men Wear Pink.' sown on the front, then picture a pair of baggy denim jeans that screamed 'I'm totally a beach boy' with its torn bottom, and then finish that picture off with a pair of black Vans skateboard shoes with the laces turned inside out that weakly signaled 'I'm bad, don't mess with me'.

(Sighs) Now do you feel Spidey's pain? Heh, bet you do.

Spider-Man grumbled loudly as he was being paraded around like a doll. Starfire was grinning her usual grin as they both awaited an answer. Raven stared at the boy currently adorned in pink and broke a titter inside as she looked at his confused yet so innocent conduct. _He looks kind of cute, _Raven thought. There was an emergency mental pause. She gagged and suddenly shook her head as if she had 'damned' herself to hell.

CUTE? That's what she thought? Cute? This was obviously 'Happy''s doing. Raven felt a blush coming on and quickly pulled her hood back over her face. She drove her eyes back into the book and answered with gritted teeth. "You look like a clown."

Spider-Man and Starfire looked at one another at that unusual outburst. The arachnoid puffed. "Do I look that bad?"

"No friend! You look very cold!" Starfire reassured. Spider-Man cocked a brow. "Uh you mean cool right?"

"No, she means cold." Raven replied. Spider-Man laughed a bit at that 'cold' remark. For some crazy reason he felt drawn to this girl's cold yet cynical ways, he was a master of the sarcastic tongue himself after all. Spider-Man took another good look in the mirror and shrugged. "I look like a butt puppet don't I?"

Starfire tweaked her eyes. "What is this butt puppet that you speak of? It is a glorious thing?"

Raven groaned and Spider-Man smirked behind his mask as he continued to glare at his flamboyant attire. A new high pitched voice joined the slight chuckles.

"Duuuude,"

The three 'Titans' turned and there stood Beast Boy with a ten pound bag of Jelly Beans. His green eyes were convulsing and some of the jelly beans he had in his mouth came spewing out.

"Always the well mannered one," Raven muttered behind her book. Beast Boy didn't hear her nor did he care! This sight was priceless and frightening. The changeling pointed a finger and trembled. "Dude, what did Star do to you?"

Spider-Man shrugged. "Why don't you tell me?"

"Man and I thought Robin had it bad." BB muttered to himself as he walked over for closer inspection. He took a gander and shook his head. With pity, he reached into his bag of Jelly Beans and pulled out an orange one.

"Cool, pumpkin pie flavored!" Beast Boy extended the morsel to Spider-Man. "Dude take it, you deserve it."

Spider-Man slowly shook his head sternly. "Sorry, not much of a pumpkin kinda guy." He then eyed the 'green goblin' in front of him and mumbled under his breath. "Especially when it's given by someone with green skin,"

"Wha?" Beast Boy pondered. Spider-Man smirked. "Nothing,"

"Uh aren't you supposed to be with Robin and Cyborg?" Raven asked. The changeling nodded. "Yea I was, but they cleaned my tokens out. Dude those two take this Arcade thing way too seriously."

"Please Beast Boy! Tell Spider-Man what you think of this 'look'." Starfire interrupted. "It is like staring at a beautiful flower no?"

"Uuuuuh,"

Suddenly all Titan communicators lit up. Robin's voice quickly followed.

"_Titans trouble! No time to explain! Follow my signal and get over here now!"_

Cyborg's battle yells could be faintly heard and the transmission quickly cut off. Raven stood. "Let's go." With that she was off with her long blue cape fluttering as she left. Beast Boy morphed into an eagle and swiftly followed. Starfire followed suit only to turn as she looked at Spider-Man, "Friend we need your help!"

Spider-Man took a pleading look back towards his dresser where his normal uniform was. Even fighting in that soaked uniform was better than going out in 'these'.

"Starfire I think I should rea-GAH!"

With a grab of the wrist the arachnoid was forced out of the shop and into the battlefield.

( - To The Trouble! - )

The results of the recent 'jail break' have already begun to take fruition. Three of Jump City's local villains have decided upon themselves to rekindle the havoc that brought them to 'justice' in the first place. Hoards of teenagers began to file out of the shopping complex frantically as the destruction started to get intense. But for us observers we all love intense now don't we?

"Cyborg!" Robin yelled as he had just witnessed his friend getting slammed through concrete. The Boy Wonder turned in an angry glare staring at the villain responsible.

"Light can be as intense as fire if focused as you can tell."

Robin scowled. "Sorry Dr. Light, but I think its time for a light bulb change."

In a flash of 'light' a bird-a-rang was sent soaring at the one and only Dr. Light. The black clad, power suited mad man replied with an energy pulse that blasted the projectile out of the air. Dr. Light began to celebrate but Robin was already on him. Swift kicks and punches began to fill the air and the light manipulator was on his heels.

In a desperate move Dr. Light unsheathed his whip of light and sent it soaring towards Robin. In a quick counter the Boy Wonder pulled out his power staff and pole vaulted himself into the air. The scene above was filled with bright energy blasts that narrowly missed Robin by inches. Dr. Light enlarged his eyes as he was about to receive a face full of metal boot. But for his sake, his ally had his back. Robin suddenly found himself grabbed by his extended leg and sent whipping towards a nearby concession stand decked with 'Mega Warrior' toys.

Dr. Light took a look at his ally and laughed. "Nice choice of weaponry."

"Likewise," The 'ally' was apparently Killer Moth, who had just sent his own energy whip soaring towards Robin. The eye-masked teen quickly leapt out of the way evading the attack. A blue blast suddenly came into play causing Killer Moth to back off his aggression.

"Man you better not be having too much fun without me." Cyborg smirked. Robin nodded in a slight chuckle. "Oh yeah, I'm having a ball."

"By the way, I would've beaten you." Cyborg winked, in remembrance of their epic battle in 'Virtual Clashers 3' before they were so rudely interrupted.

"You can stop dreaming," Robin retorted as he unsheathed his staff. "Besides, after this it's rematch time."

"Right on brotha," Cyborg commented as he aimed his cannon towards the two villains that had assaulted them.

"Hehe, sorry kiddies but 'gaming' time isn't worth it without a killer big screen T.V!"

The two Titans turned to see a large Television set horrifically brought to life by a certain magical remote controller. "Taa taa Titans!" Robin and Cyborg quickly took aim at the killer T.V. but they were beaten to the punch. The T.V. set was quickly intercepted by a black telekinetic blast that drove it through a wall. Apparently the empath of the Titans had decided to join the fray.

The one who created the 'high-definition' capable monster growled. "That is not a way to treat quality home entertainment!"

"You're right." Raven scowled. "But that's the way we should treat slobs like you."

Control freak laughed his fan boy obsessive laugh. "Feisty, almost as feisty as the space warrior amazons in Clash of The Planets 3: The Lost Rune." 

Raven cocked a brow. "O-k."

"Dude, those space chicks are hot aren't they?" Beast Boy suddenly popped out of nowhere with that statement drooling a bit. Raven groaned and was prepared to fire back.

Dr. Light, Killer Moth, and Control Freak laughed at the four Titans in front of them. The couch potato smirked. "Alright Titans, with Doc L and KM on my team you all got no chance, so I guess the real question here is," He tossed some shades on. "Are you feelin' lucky… Punks?"

The Titans only snickered at the movie quote. Cyborg pointed. "We don't need luck to take you three losers down."

"Heh, is that your final answer?"

It all came in one simultaneous blitz. Killer Moth flew in from above and started to wail away with his whip, while Dr. Light began to fill the area with his signature waves of energy. To top it off Control Freak summoned some cardboard cutouts of Samurais to do their 'slice-n-dice' thing. Energy blasts of all colors began to fill the air as the Titans engaged. Robin's bo staff collided with swords, Dr. Light's beams tangled with Cyborg's and Raven's blasts, Beast Boy's bird talons mingled with Killer Moth's whip.

It was an all out war. And in a mall of all places!

The advantage was quickly swinging in our baddies' favor as Control Freak began to make use of even more inanimate objects in the form of VCR's and cash registers. Robin grunted as he smashed a Samurai in half with a swift blow from his staff. He turned to his teammates. "Titans we need to re-" suddenly Beast Boy came barreling into him in chimpanzee form, sending them both tumbling across the tiled ground.

Beast Boy reverted back to human form and laughed nervously. "Hah! My bad dude," Robin gave a frustrated huff as Cyborg and Raven joined them on the ground with grunts as well. The Titans were floored and surrounded.

"Hmm, I recall there were five of you." Dr. Light mocked. Killer Moth began to count heads. "Right, this is strange."

"Aw who cares? Four dead Titans is good enough for me." Control Freak scratched his double chin. "Has sitcom written all over it, heh, don't yo-"

The loud mouth was silenced only because of equally loud yells from across the court. It was yells and grunts from our two favorite dress up partners.

"Spider-Man you must fight!" Starfire pulled.

Spider-Man groaned as he held for dear life onto his weblines that were anchored to the ground. "Look I want to help Star, but not in this! Anything but this!" he paused. "Well maybe not ANYTHING but this."

"Sorry but we must!" she pleaded, "Do not worry friend, you look very handsome!"

"I look ridiculous!" Spidey retorted. "Ah come on just let me head back to the store and-"

"There is no time!" Starfire kept pulling and slowly but surely the weblines snapped and the two heroes inadvertently catapulted themselves into the skirmish. They came tumbling down with the other Titans who only sweat dropped at the kindly put 'unusual event'. The whole area went silent at their arrival.

Spider-Man tentatively took a gander at his snapped weblines and dropped his jaw. _She is strong…_

"Man!" Cyborg yelled and Spidey broke thought. He caught the half-droid in a glare. "I hope Starfire picked those digs out for you."

The arachnoid looked towards Starfire who was smiling and then shrugged towards Cyborg. "What? I like pink."

Starfire quickly lit up. "Glorious! So you finally approve friend?" Spider-Man let out a sigh. "Well I don't know abo-"

It was too late. Good ol' Peter Parker was in one of Starfire's death grips and the rest of the Titans sighed. The villains were a bit taken back as you could only imagine.

"Who the hell is this guy?" Control Freak muttered. Killer Moth shrugged. "I dunno but I like the mask. It reminds me of someone."

"No matter, so the Titans have made a new friend. They'll all get a chance to see the 'light'."

The Titans all came to a stand full powered and ready for round two. Control Freak laughed. "Come on Titans even with a new teammate you guys can't win! I am Control Freak! Like a twelfth level Ninja Shogun from Iyashagi I am unstoppable!"

Spider-Man enlarged his pseudoeye. "Hmmm, nobody told me there was going to be a Star Wars convention. Say who are you supposed to be? Jabba the Hutt?"

Spider-Man looked down the line and glared at the other two villains. "Oh and there's Jar Jar Binks and R2D2! Aren't we just one big happy family?"

Control Freak growled. "Hah, you're the one dressed in pink and you're poking fun at us?"

"Ay, I like pink okay. People tell me it brings out the white in my eyes. Don't you agree?"

"Heh, he's actually pretty funny." Killer Moth chuckled only to get irate looks from his teammates.

The Titans looked on at Spidey in a bit of surprise. His banter was something else. It was like a combo of Raven's witty sarcasm and Beast Boy's relentless jawing. Jump City had never gotten a true taste of Spider-Man's constant verbal bashing, and this was clearly only the beginning.

"Hah! Jar Jar Binks." Cyborg chuckled and so did the rest of the team. Even Raven of all people, although that was barely noticeable. Beast Boy suddenly crossed his hands. "Dude, I'm supposed to be the comic relief!"

Raven cleared her throat. "Don't you kind of have to be 'funny' to be the comic relief?"

Killer Moth slashed with his whip. "Alright enough of this, we're going to kill you all!"

The Titans stood strong. Robin gave the command. "TITANS GO!"

The Titans quickly took control of the battle as Raven, Cyborg, and Beast Boy squared off against Killer Moth. Robin and Starfire took their shots at Control Freak who scurried off to a nearby 'Radioshack' for an advantage.

That left Spider-Man and Dr. Light alone. "Looks like it's just you and me,"

Dr. Light stood silent. 

Spider-Man chuckled. "Oh right! How impolite of me, maybe I should start talking in robot talk eh? Boop boop beep bop bep bop."

"So a new Titan, time for you to be en'light'ened of my power."

He looked at Dr. Light's illuminating armor with a scoff. "Nice suit, are batteries included?"

The light manipulator had about enough and launched a large amber beam towards our arachnoid. Spider-Man with the grace of a true spider flipped into the air and began doing his signature 'you can't hit me' scramble. Blast after blast missed as if the only currently pink adorned hero knew what was going to happen before it did.

Dr. Light quickly stopped, noticing his attacks were futile. Spider-Man chuckled. "Aw what's the matter? Flashlight running out of juice?"

"You desperately need your mouth shut."

"And you desperately need to 'lighten' up."

With a frustrated yell Dr. Light began firing at the quickest rate possible and Spider-Man only moved double time. The arachnoid fired a web line towards a toy store and zipped his way to a cling onto the side of the glass. In seconds the toy store glass shattered and Spider-Man flipped off the mirror and landed in his signature crouch. He took a glance to his rear and then turned back to the man in the glowing suit. 

"Anyone ever tell you 'nightlights' are supposed to be helpful to little children?"

"How is this possible? You are just a brat with a horrible sense of fashion. I am Dr. Light - master manipulator of all that shines brightly!"

Spider-Man teasingly yawned. "Well first off I wouldn't be talking about 'fashion' if I were you. Secondly controlling light isn't all that impressive. Ever heard of a clapper? Or a light switch?"

"What are you getting at?"

"Can that little brain of yours understand how a clapper works?"

"Get on with it!"

"Well, let's see if I clap twice, and you go 'lights out'. Technically I can manipulate light as well right?"

"Hah, that's impossible!" Dr. Light denied. Spider-Man smiled. "Well let's see."

CLAP! CLAP! 

Dr. Light looked around and nothing happened. "Hah, you are a fool." he extended both hands for a blast. "Prepare to di-" suddenly a metal boot knocked Dr. Light's 'lights' out and sent him crashing to the floor. Spider-Man chuckled as he nodded towards Robin.

"Nice." Spider-Man thumbs upped Robin who returned it. Seemingly out of nowhere a couple of explosions were heard. They were created by a barrage of starbolts taking out a fleet of walking VCRs. Robin quickly tossed a few freeze bombs across the frontlines turning them into popsicles. Control Freak's laughing could be heard through all of this.

"Hahaha I RULE YOU TITANS!"

Robin scowled. "We need to get that remote." Spider-Man chuckled. "Leave it to me boss, just keep those er… killer VCR's off me."

Robin nodded and quickly went on an all out assault. The combination of Starfire and Robin gave Spider-Man enough distraction and he web slung his way over towards Control Freak. The arachnoid landed with a crouch next to the infamous couch potato.

"Heyah."

"Alright bug, fear me! For I control the vertical! And I control the horizontal! I control all!"

"Wait, how about the diagonal?" Spider-Man shrugged. Control Freak scratched his chin. "Uh I am not sure about that… but who cares? I'll think about it when you're dead!"

Suddenly a portion of the VCR fleet came crawling towards him. The arachnoid chuckled and pointed glared at Control Freak. "I've fought sharp toothed aliens, a man eating lizard, and a mad scientist with four bionic tentacles and I'm supposed to be scared of some walking VCRs?"

With that rant of his history, Spider-Man quickly pointed behind Control Freak. "Whoa look! It's Boba Fett!"

Control Freak enlarged his eyes. "What? Where?" he had been duped. Spider-Man whistled and the couch potato returned his glare angrily. "Oh you're so gonna get burned!" Control Freak yelled. He then attempted to press a button on his remote control of 'doom'. But all he pressed was his own palm. "Huh?"

"Looking for something?" Spider-Man teased as he was spinning the freak's controller in his hand by a thread of web. With a flip it came into a graceful stop in his bare hand.

"NO!"

"Sorry but all shows have been canceled." Spider-Man in a clench of his fist smashed the remote into pieces. Control Freak screamed into the air as it happened but was swiftly silenced with a bolt of webbing. Soon he was totally coiled in web and was wrapped tightly on the ground. Spider-Man began to nod his head in approval but a loud voice broke his concentration. 

"Man oh man we rule!" Cyborg yelled as he walked over with a defeated Killer Moth.

"Dude, that was sweet!" Beast Boy fist pumped. "We totally kicked butt!"

Raven floated over towards Control Freak and inspected the webbing. "So, seems like you wrapped up things pretty nicely. Very uh spider-like," she mused. "Just how much 'spider' and how much hu'man' are you anyway?"

"Well not sure, but all I gotta do is inject him with my toxin and wait till his insides dissolve then I can drink it."

Blank stares of disgust.

"Joke,"

The three Titans let out sighs of relief. Robin and Starfire joined in with a lassoed Dr. Light. The Titans looked at one another and at their villainous trio. Robin smirked at Spider-Man. "Well I think you proved that you definitely can be one of us."

Starfire nodded. "Yes! You were wonderful! I am impressed with the 'mean talk' and the jumpy nature of your battling! It reminds me of the Rhonghouls of Sector 34 of the Gworksak Galaxy."

"Uh thanks?" 

Cyborg quickly walked over clearly too excited and gave Spider-Man a slap on the back. The arachnoid tumbled a bit out of surprise and Cyborg only laughed. "Man! Who taught you how to smack talk like that?"

"Yea dude, can you give us pointers?" Beast Boy begged.

"Sure," Spider-Man glared at his clothes. "But first can we rush those 'S.T.A.R' Labs people that are making me spare suits? As much as I like pink I'm more partial to red and blue myself."

The two Titan homeboys quickly hogged the arachnoid and barraged him with plenty more questions. Robin and Starfire gave each other a mutual smile. They turned to Raven who seemed to be nodding her head slightly.

"What's up now Raven?" Robin asked. Raven turned to him with a slight smirk. "You know… I'm starting to think that he might actually be helpful."

With that surprising statement, Raven hovered after them. Robin and Starfire gave each other a light chuckle as they walked out together preparing to be mobbed by fans outside the mall. Starfire stared at her close friend but then grew a bit concern. 

"Robin, your smile is gone. Is something wrong?"

The Boy Wonder took one last glance at the fallen villains as they were quickly being taken care of by JCPD officers. These three were imprisoned and they all broke out at once? That was a bit strange… he turned to Starfire.

"I'm just getting a feeling that these unusual events are tied together somehow." Robin scowled. "And I don't think it's a good thing either."

Unknowingly to Robin, he hit the bull's eye with that statement. Because as quickly as Spider-Man was fitting in with his new allies? Venom and Carnage were doing exactly the same. It was only a matter of time until the Titans would have to deal with those two and with every second passing, the time drew nearer. (DUND! DUND! DUND!)

( - H.I.V.E. Headquarters: Blood's Office - )

Blood scowled as he stood with his back against our three favorite H.I.V.E. agents as well as our two favorite symbiotes (Still in JCPD uniforms because they think they're just too cool!). It was a bit silent and of course Carnage 'killed' the time by thinking of all the people he had killed in the last hour or so.

"You three are an abomination to my school." Blood's eyes turned to fire. "You know how embarrassing it is when we have to constantly bail you three out?" Our trio stood silent sweating bullets. "You three should be graduates by now!"

"We're sorry headmaster." Jinx replied with her head hung low. Gizmo and Mammoth followed. "Yes headmaster, it won't happen again."

Blood growled. "Leave! Repay me by excelling in the classroom."

The three H.I.V.E. members slowly walked out the door while Carnage and Venom shook their heads at them in a way of saying 'tsk tsk tsk.'

Carnage then nudged at Venom in a whisper. "Pops, did you notice that they called him 'head'master? Hah!"

"Hehehe," Venom tried not to laugh but couldn't control himself. He began to chortle along trying to muffle himself with his hands. Blood cleared his throat and it became silent yet again.

"So it appears you two have completed your end of the deal."

Venom chuckled. "Oh yeah, it was fun."

"But you also did more than what was asked by freeing all the prisoners."

Carnage chuckled. "Oh yeah, it was fun."

"Risky but I like the initiative."

They both chuckled. "Oh yeah, it was fun."

Blood gave a sour look at their joking remarks but slowly turned to them with a forced grin. "So a deal is a deal. You two are now students of the H.I.V.E."

"Sweet," Carnage muttered. "Now where's my gift certificate?"

Blood scowled. "You'll get your perks in due time. But for now we'll need to run some battle tests on you two. I want to see you at your fullest potential."

"Tests? We don't do tests." Venom grumbled.

"Trust me, I think you two will love this kind of test." Blood smiled. "You do like to destroy things don't you?"

"Hah! Does Britney Spears lip sync?" Carnage replied.

Blood skewed his eyes. "I believe I'll just take that as a yes." he pointed out the door. "Now go and prepare yourselves for combat practice. You will be on exposition for the whole school. I want them all to see what a true villain is supposed to be."

"Okay that's all fine and dandy" Carnage scowled. "But where's my gift certificate?" 

Venom growled and shook his head, slowly walking out the door. Blood sighed and did the same. Because of this there stood our Carnage all alone. He looked to the air and shrugged. "What?"

He quickly griped and took off after his pops. "YO VENOM WAIT UP!"

As one could tell while strange and hilarious, this partnership between the symbiotes and the H.I.V.E. was going to be a potent one. The Titans were going to definitely have their hands full. Definitely!


	5. TV Rots Your Brains!

( - The Marvel Universe: New York City - )

There is a specific moment in a renowned person's life that tells them when they've truly hit the 'big time'. Actually if you yourself would want to live a stereotypical superstar lifestyle, this would be the primary goal of your very existence my friend. The very point of reaching this certain aspiration decides whether you're flaming hot! Or pitifully not! It's a moment that one could call the pinnacle of the strenuous climb to world-wide notoriety.

Well everyone, this is troublesome to say, but someone we all know and love was about to reach this pinnacle of stardom at this very (scary) moment. To think that in only a mere two days this child 'prodigy' has already gained enough respect and renown to have this blessing placed upon his big ol' head. Yes friends! It is now freakin' official!

Larry the Legend has been born!

From zero to hero! Three cheers for our Larry! Hip hip! Hurray! Hip hip! Hurray! Hip hip! Hur… Oh wait… you all must be wondering what this 'oh so' prestigious honor is eh? Well kiddies I'll tell you. Wait… can we get a drum roll please?

(Drum roll)

Alright… do you really want to know?

Seriously do you? Oh you do? Fine.

Well then… it is the tremendous honor, and an extreme privilege to be the star of your very own…

"**Got Milk?" Magazine Ad!**

Yep! Our Larry was going to join the ranks of many talented faces such as Sarah Michelle Gellar, the Olsen Twins, and Yoda. Fear it people! Fear the craze! For Larry-mania was running wild all over New York City! And of course Larry was totally basking in its alien yet extremely comforting attention.This obsessive fan-boy was finally getting an accurate taste of what being like his favorite hero felt like after all, although probably in a more forceful sense that's for sure. Good for him or bad for him? Heh, why don't you decide?

"Wait! Hold it! Stop the flashes!"

The photography crew stood silent as the lead photographer threw her face into her hands in frustration. Larry, who was adorned in that usual Robin-stuff, gave her a skewed look as he stood in pose. So innocent his face was, but apparently 'innocent' wasn't what this lady 'does'.

"Larry I've told you a hundred times now! You're not supposed to drink the whole glass."

"I'm not?"

"Yes! We need some milk in the glass for the picture."

"Oops, Larry is sorry."

The director sighed. "Yes, yes you are." She turned to her assistants, "Okay, now let's do this for the what? The squillionth time?"

The camera crew groaned as they made preparations once again. In a few, every detail was set and ready to go and damn was Larry pumped!

"Alright! Larry is ready!"

"Whoopee," The director muttered as she stared at the child. _This kid is driving me insane. _She shook her head. _There is no way in hell this kid got rid of Spider-Man, Venom, and Carnage._ She took another harsh glance as Larry was running around with arms spread like an airplane._ There's just no way…_

Oh yes there was director lady. There was definitely a way. We all know that.

Larry took a glass of milk from an assistant and drank it until it was half-full (Or empty for you pessimists), letting the spillage drizzle down his chin and all over his Robin costume. Honestly this created more of a milk beard rather than a mustache and this only brought about more sighs. The director and her helpers stood in a weak manner, whimpering as they grabbed their faces in frustration.

"Oh what the hell let's just go with it." The director moped. "They are so not paying me enough for this."

So with that, the photo session began and relatively smoothly at that. Larry wasn't going to disappoint either as he was striking all sorts of poses (Robin inspired of course) while letting his as usual much inspired yells of 'Yay!' echo in the room. Yup, all was going well for our favorite little doppelganger here. Oh yeah, that was until the sound of glass shattering made everyone in the room jump with semi-heart attacks. Nothing too bad though.

The pair responsible for the crash landed in the room in a slight crouch and slowly took a glance at their surroundings. A pin drop could be heard as the area was entirely silenced by the duo that had just crashed the party. These weren't your normal civilians by the way. You could easily tell by their attire… that is unless you're blind, which ironically one of them was. Funny how that works eh?

The two were adorned in tight skin suits - the male in dark-red, the female in black and white. While the male's devil-like costume did grab some attention, being that mostly 'guys' were in the room the female's skin-tight 'hubba hubba' attire was a sight that was clearly a bit more cherished.

"Sorry everyone, but show's over." The one in red smirked. The female nodded in agreement as she slowly stood.

"Whoa I can't believe it… you're… you're…"

"Not in a good mood." She scowled while forcing the assistance's mouth shut with her 'paw'. She then turned her head swiftly, letting that long snow white hair flutter back in that 'oh so posh' sorta way, bringing about more sighs. The male of the pair walked over to the assistant who was still slobbering with his closed jaw in a light chuckle. "Heh better luck next time kid,"

Larry laughed a bit nervously as these two threatening figures let their shadows cast over him.

"Um, hello." Larry muttered as the two slowly stalked him in a prowler's approach. He gave them both a skewed look behind his eye mask as the pair finally stood before him with arms crossed and eyes glaring down upon him with intensity.

"Um… nice to meet-aaah!" The female of the pair suddenly grabbed Larry by his tunic and lifted him up so they were face to face.

"Uh… Larry likes your costume," He grinned with heart eyes. "You are very pretty." He then turned to her apparent partner, "Don't you agree mister?"

"Sorry kiddo," The red-eyed man shrugged. "I wouldn't know."

Larry's grasper gave him a harsh stare as she spoke with gritted teeth. "Are you the one who got rid of my Spider?"

"Uuuh I…"

"Answer me you little runt!"

"Uuuuh."

"A little advice here," The one in red began to inform. "First I'd tell her everything you know. Black Cat isn't one of those girls you should take lightly son. Second I'd tell the truth and nothing but the truth, because I can see a lie from a mile away… literally."

Yes people, you probably already guessed it correctly. Our little duo of 'party crashers' here apparently consisted of Spidey's two closest heroic neighbors and friends. It was the always voluptuous vigilante known as Black Cat and the forever intimidating blind crime fighter known as Daredevil.

Larry gulped at our two heroes. "Do not worry… Larry does not lie!"

"Then spill it!" Black Cat demanded.

"It… it was an accident."

Black Cat paused at the troublesome reply. "Accident?" She suddenly snapped as she shook him wildly. "What did you do to him?"

Larry tried to reply but could only manage half words as he was literally having the life shaken out of him.

"If you hurt him in anyway you'll be-"

Daredevil shook his head. "Calm down Cat. He won't be useful to us totally knocked out."

Black Cat gave one last growl as she finally calmed herself. In a ball of frustration she tossed Larry, plopping him down on his bottom. She stared at the grimacing child and suddenly walked away with her back turned as she was desperately restraining herself from doing something she would regret. Apparently somebody here really cares about our dimension warped arachnoid.

"That was not fun at all." Larry muttered as he rubbed his 'hurt'.

"Okay kid unless you want another taste of that. Tell us what you did to Spider-Man." Daredevil grew serious. "Is he… dead?"

Larry shook his head wildly. "No! Larry does not kill!"

Daredevil stood silent attempting to lock in on this frightened boy's heartbeat. He smirked. "Okay, you're clean so far. Continue."

"Well Larry did not mean to do it! I made a boo boo! It all started when I wanted to go meet the Titans and see Robin! My favorite super hero of all time! I was watching them kicking bad guy butt on the T.V. you see? And then I asked myself…"

(Five Minutes Later)

"YAAAAH!" Larry yelled as he was once again being shaken with relentless aggression.

Black Cat growled like the dominating feline she was. "You teleport my Spider back here this instant you pip squeak!"

"Laaaarry caaaaaaannot!" Larry replied as best as he could, while being plainly made into a milkshake. "Myyy maaaaagic fiiiinger iiiiis nooooot heaaaled."

Black Cat stopped as Larry's eyes were literally swirling. Daredevil gave a loud exhale of breath. "When can we expect this _finger_ of yours to heal?"

Larry began looking at his bummed magical extremity. "Um, I am not sure mister! It all depends! It could be anytime! Magic is hard to predict."

"Well so am I if you don't get him back right now!" Black Cat looked as if she was going to strangle him but Daredevil intervened again.

"Stop, we have bigger things to worry about." Daredevil shook his head. "Besides the fact that I need to go to psychiatrist of course, I still can't believe this kid's story is actually the truth."

Black Cat, still holding onto Larry, turned towards her current partner in crime. "You're right. Without Spider it's like the crime rate has shot through the roof. I can't handle all this alone."

"You're telling me. Kingpin has been sending his goons out non-stop since yesterday. I can't help in Manhattan. I got my hands full as it is."

Black Cat bit her lip. "Can't we ask the Fantastic Four to help?"

"No, they're busy helping the Avengers back on the west coast."

Pause.

"How about the X-men? They have like what? Fifty members? Can't they send a few over?"

"Sad to say but no, Professor X said they're dealing with some potential intergalactic war that could cause a cataclysmic disintegration to all life."

Black Cat sighed. "So pretty much the usual for them?" Daredevil nodded. "Yep. Besides, I don't think letting Wolverine patrolling these streets by himself would be a good idea anyway."

"Right,"

The two sat and pondered. Larry scratched his chin being, like always, the odd boy out. Black Cat suddenly grinned as she looked at Larry's innocent display. The light bulb just went on.

"You know, I got an idea." She smirked. Larry caught her mutual eye masked glare with his own and 'uuuh'd'.

"I think you being such a big 'hero' and all, should take Spider's place until you can bring him back."

"Huh?" Daredevil and Larry asked simultaneously. The devil masked man slapped his head in disbelief. "Okay, I know I have super human hearing but please tell me I heard you wrong."

"No, you heard me right." Black Cat smiled at Larry in her natural seductive way. "Well 'Larry the Legend' you're now officially my new partner."

Daredevil threw a hand in his face in pure skepticism. "Oh no,"

Larry laughed nervously and it slowly dissipated into a gulp. "I think Larry does not want to be the hero anymore."

( - Jump City: Almost A Week Later - )

"Dude you guys!" Beast Boy yelled. "It's almost on!"

The green changeling made a mad dash for that very famous Titan semi-circular couch and leapt into it headfirst like a kamikaze pilot. The automatic slide doors to the living room shot open as the rest of the Titans filed in. Starfire came rocketing into the quarters like a concentration of pure positive energy as usual, clapping in anticipation.

"I truly cannot believe they are dedicating some of the T.V. time just for our newest friend! This is glorious!"

Raven hovered in quite a bit slower after her orange skinned friend, of course with a book in hand. "Starfire, this is pointless."

Cyborg wasn't too far behind and came barreling in from the other side of the room with his signature assorted array of snack foods. "Yo make way on the landing pad because the ooey gooey goodness plane is here ya'll!"

The box consisting of the unhealthiest foods known to mankind was scattered onto the table like marbles hitting the floor. Beast Boy and Cyborg were plainly hypnotized by the beauty of the mound of marshmallows and chocolate bars that lay before them. The slide doors of the living room opened again and all eyes turned to the two red clad heroes.

"I still don't get it. How could they never find out who were the ones responsible for that jail break?" Robin scowled. Spider-Man sighed. "Ya know after spending four days with you I'm starting to notice that you don't let things go very easily do you?"

"Hah, that's the understatement of the year." Raven replied with her eyes glued on her book. Robin tightened his masked eyes. "We have to find out who did it."

Cyborg grumbled with his mouth full of sweets. "Man they already told us Rob, they said it was two psychotic teenage wannabe police officers."

Beast Boy spoke with an equal amount of sugar in his pie hole. "Yea and seriously that could be anyone."

"Yea besides," Spider-Man chuckled. "I think we cleaned up the mess pretty well."

"Man, are you kidding?" Cyborg bellowed. "We've never had it this easy. Since you showed up this town has been pretty dang quiet ya know that?"

"Yea dude I haven't had this much free time since… well… ever!" Beast Boy grinned with glee as he gorged himself with another Crunch bar.

"Glad I could help." Spider-Man nodded. "Now thank me with one of those candy bars before you both eat 'em all."

Cyborg held up a Twix and with a shot n' pull of that webbing the candy was in Spidey's hands. Starfire began to jump with joy as she watched another commercial end on the T.V. "This is most exciting! We are all going to be on the television!"

"Dudes! Why don't we do this more often?" Beast Boy growled. "Ya know what? We should even get our own T.V. show! Yea that's it!"

Spider-Man nodded. "Oh yea and I should get my own theatrical trilogy."

Raven finally peeled her eyes off the book. "Sorry, but who in their right mind would want to watch a T.V. show let alone a movie about us?"

(Cue suave looks and winks to the reader.)

Spider-Man and Beast Boy glared at one another with a shrug.

Cyborg pointed as he began to pump up the volume on the T.V. set. "Ok shut up ya'll it's starting!"

--

(That overly epic music of the 6 o'clock News filled with violins and cheesy synth effects blasted through the speakers as its accompanying montage played. The scene faded to 'the desk' where two handsome looking gentlemen nodded at the camera.)

Walter Strife: "Good Evening Jump City, I'm Walter Strife!"

John Beezwhacks: "And I'm John Beezwhacks!"

Walter: "And like always it is a pleasure for us to bring you the hottest news from this here side on the west coast!"

John: "Agreed Walter, say how was your weekend ol' buddy?"

Walter: "Awesome, I did a little fishing with my friends, we had a few laughs, drank a few-"

John: (cough) "Wow interesting. Let's move on."

(Walter scowled.)

John: "Folks as you know we here at Jump City have been blessed with having one of the most successful super groups of all time."

Walter: "Yes people, they are the pride and joy of our fair city. Of course I am speaking of our much beloved Teen Titans."

John: "And as if we weren't already blessed enough, we at Jump City have been clearly given another jolt in our defenses."

Walter: "That's right. It is a jolt in the form of a mysterious teen dressed in red and blue that battles evil to give them their 'do'. He is the newest made Teen Titan, and forever he will keep on fightin'."

John: "Wow Walter, you rhymed… twice even."

Walter: "I know. Anyway people, who exactly is this mystery teen? What has brought him here? Why does he protect this city? How does he get into that costume anyway?"

John: "Well Walter, all these questions still irk us today but thanks to our tenacious staff we have gotten the exclusive on this newest masked crusader."

Walter: "Yes folks! We got the low-down on our newest local super hero and April Summers has more on this story, of a heroic arachnid with a more or less interesting taste in outerwear."

(The scene fades to an overly dramatic close up shot of Titans Tower as the sun was setting. The camera slowly pulled out and showed our favorite news reporter standing with mic in hand.)

April: "Just one week ago Ashrum Meta-Penitentiary suffered the largest jail break in its entire history. Of course something of that magnitude should have spelled disaster for our city. But little did we know that because of a certain new hero, the mess that was made was just as swiftly cleaned. A good-willed spider had officially made his home in Jump City."

--

"'Good-willed'?" Raven groaned. "Something tells me these reporters love to lay it on real thick."

Beast Boy scoffed. "Aw come on Raven, just look at that innocent looking face!"

Spider-Man tilted his head in a playful manner letting his pseudo eyes enlarge. Raven only scowled and turned to the T.V. again.

"I believe our friend is well deserving of these accolades!" Starfire grinned. "Am I correct Robin?"

Robin didn't answer as he stared at the T.V. seemingly in deep thought. "I still can't believe we haven't gotten those perpetrators that freed those prisoners."

The rest of the Titans sighed as Robin stewed in his anger. Cyborg just rolled his one human eye towards Spider-Man.

"Sooo Spidey, remember the first baddie you took out as a full-time member of the team?"

"Oh yeah I do. That was pretty sweet…"

**Cue Blurry Flashback Effects…**

_Jump City was the scene for a run down for the ages. It was Pay Per View stuff people! It was the Rancid cycle vs. the T-car. BOOYAH! _

Cyborg grinned devilishly as he was giving relentless chase, fully concentrating on bringing his target to justice. Although judging by this target's prolonged evasion he was a slick one that was for sure. From the grease on his head and shirt to his skills on a bike, yes he was a slippery one. Decked in biker wear and controlling one of the fastest hogs in town, Johnny Rancid was going to be one tough catch but like always Cyborg was totally ready… or so he thought.

_The T-Car bobbed and weaved between the flowing traffic, following the biker and not letting up one bit. "Haha come on Tinman. What's the matter? Your hunk of junk too slow?" Rancid yelled as he bunny hopped over another car, scrapping the top as he rode over it. The traffic caused Cyborg to spin out and abruptly stop his pursuit. _

_The half-droid scowled has he slammed his fist into his palm. "Damn!" _

"_Don't worry Cy, I got this."_

_From behind the T-Car came Robin who zipped right after Rancid on the R-Cycle. The Boy Wonder scowled behind his visor as he was closing in on our villain. Robin used a nearby tow truck as a ramp and launched himself into the air and came barreling down beside Johnny Rancid._

"_Alright Johnny end of the line!" Robin yelled as he reached for a bird-a-rang. _

Johnny Rancid smiled. "For you bird boy."

_Suddenly Rancid slammed on the breaks and stopped. Robin was taken by surprise from this move and suddenly looked up to see that he was heading straight into a hot dog cart. _

_**CRAAAAAASH!**_

_Rancid began to laugh but was caught mid cackle as green bolts from above started to rain down upon him. He looked up and there was Starfire, soaring straight towards him with eyes glowing bright emerald. Not too far behind her was Beast Boy in pterodactyl form and it was their turn to give chase. Rancid turned his bike and started to accelerate. Starbolts continued to rain but Johnny managed to evade most of them. Beast Boy came in for a grasping swoop but again that was countered by some fancy riding tricks._

_After a few more moments of bombardment Johnny Rancid finally found the cover he was looking for by riding through a tunnel. He blasted through and looked back as Starfire and Beast Boy were forced to hesitate and stop chase. He started to laugh as he was exploding towards the opening on the other side. "Stupid kids, they should know that they can never mess with-AAAAAAAAH!"_

_Suddenly Rancid was clipped off by some sort of grayish rope that de-biked him. The ruffian was sent spinning uncontrollably in the air from his momentum and screamed for his dear life. After that moment of pure terror Rancid finally opened his eyes expecting to be in great pain but somehow he wasn't. In shock he tried to move but apparently something was holding him down… or in this case up._

_Rancid looked towards the ground and noticed he was being suspended by a lamppost upside down and wrapped in some sort of webbing. He turned his head upwards again and was met with a figure that sat perched on the lamp post._

"_So," His capturer laughed. "How's it hangin'?"_

"_Uuugh…" Rancid groaned as he accepted defeat. Spider-Man nodded in victory. A small crowd of people surrounded him and began to cheer. The Titans didn't take too long and joined singing their praises._

"_Booyah baby!" Cyborg nodded. "Look at you, chillin' like a villain."_

"_Nice work." Robin agreed. Starfire smiled as well. "Your techniques are truly admirable!"_

"_Uh… thanks guys." It truly was amazing. Spider-Man was actually appreciated here. _

Spidey snickered as he looked over towards his new teammates. He glanced over at Beast Boy who was sticking out his tongue while struggling with something.

"_Dude, how the heck do you do that thingy with your hand when you shoot your web?" Beast Boy asked as he struggled to form that signature hand shape we all know and love. His version looked more like the 'I'm so Metal' type. Raven only groaned at her friend's idiocy._

"_No compliments Raven?" Spidey asked._

_Raven shrugged. "Should I have any?" _

"_Oh come on, even you have to say I totally rocked it."_

_Raven simply sweat dropped._

Spider-Man smiled breaking out of his dreaming gaze. "Boy that was fun." He paused, "But I am wondering something though…"

"What?" Cyborg asked.

"Did we ever let that Rancid guy down?"

Cyborg and Robin quickly enlarged their eyes as they suddenly realized they didn't. "Oh no,"

"Will you two pipe it? Some of us are trying to watch!" Beast Boy complained.

Cyborg, Robin, and Spider-Man looked at one another and ultimately dropped the issue.

--

April: "He has given the city's defenses a large boost and has taken not only this city but has taken this world by storm. Who is this mysterious teen? And what does the world think of this 'Spider-Man'?"

(The scene switched to a park in the Chicago area with a large furry beast with horns and a teenager literally on fire on camera.)

April: "So what do you think of the Teen Titans newest member Spider-Man?"

Wildebeest: (crosses his arms) "Grrr."

Hot Spot: (Shrugs) "Uh, what he said."

(The scene dissolved to a mall in Dakota City where two costumed heroes pondered on the question as well.)

Gear: "Spider-Man? From what I've seen? Totally cool. Shooting those webs and sticking on walls. Awesome!"

Static: "Yea always cool to have new heroes pop up. By the way (Grabs the camera and shoves his face in it) What's up Robin and the gang! You still owe us a visit."

Gear: "Yea and bring that Spider-guy along, he has one wic-"

(Static accidentally sent a jolt of electricity through the camera killing the feed.)

(Scene cuts to a park in Jump City where fans are gathering with Spider-Man masks adorned.)

Fans: "Spider-Man totally rules!"

Young Female: (Runs in front of camera with a large sign) "Here's my number! CALL ME! PLEASE!"

(Scene changes to Steel City where two heroes, one dressed similar to Robin and the other in deep blue, were scratching their heads.)

Speedy: "Uh what the heck is a 'Spider Man'?"

Aqualad: "Beats me, got a lot of those bug people running around lately."

Speedy: "Seriously, is there such a thing as originality anymore?"

Aqualad: (Gives Speedy a skewed look)

Speedy: "What?"

--

"So I guess you're Mr. Popularity now." Cyborg mused.

"Of course man, my arachnid charms can sweep anyone off their feet." Spidey bragged with a joking tone.

"Oh so the Spider has all the confidence in the world now huh?" Cyborg smirked.

"Didn't I always?"

"You weren't that confident a couple of days ago at the park signing autographs."

"Oh right." Spider-Man huffed. "Hehehe… heh… heh… heh."

**Cue Even Blurrier Flashback Effects…**

_The smell of BBQ filled the air as the Titans were having a kickback at the local park. They did the usual - throwing footballs, chowing down, and relaxing, just your normal teenage hanging out stuff, only with super human teenagers performing the acts of course. While it was a relatively peaceful time, a group of locals mustered up enough courageousness and surrounded the Titans as they gawked at these six heroes with admiration. _

_Handling the hoards of fans came with the territory of being super heroes. Robin handled this type of thing with the calmness and swagger all great leaders show. Starfire handled it with her as usual over the top kindliness. Beast Boy and Cyborg weren't too far off from Starfire, as they literally absorbed the glory like sponges do water. Raven of course handled it the way she does everything, with total semi-pseudo indifference. _

_While the five original Titans had different methods in dealing with the constant barrage of avid fans, the newest one didn't have that luxury. Spider-Man plainly didn't know how to handle it. _

"_Cool! You're the 'New Guy' right?" A young child smiled. "Yea you're Spider-Man!" _

Spidey nodded. "It seems that way."

"_Alright! You're my favorite Titan! I want to be just like you!" The child gave the cutest puppy eyes one could ever see. _

_Spider-Man gave the boy a stutter. "Wait… you," he pointed. "Wanna be just… like," He paused. "Me?" _

_The young boy nodded very quickly in agreement. The rest of the Titans gave slight laughs as they watched the 'rookie' try to get used to receiving kudos. Spider-Man scratched his head._

"_Um, thanks." Spidey lowered himself into a kneeling position so that he was face to face with the youngster. "Just eat your veggies and drink your milk."_

"_Then I can be just like you!" _

"_Yea, just like me." Spider-Man nodded as he just pulled a 'Captain America'-like speech. _

"_YEA!" The child grinned as he reached into his back pocket in excitement. "Can you please give me an autograph?"_

"_Uh… sure." This was definitely uncharted territory. Spider-Man was handed a pen as the child was searching through his backpack for something. Our crimson hero looked over towards the Titans who were only nodding in approval. _

"_Here we go! Sign this!"_

_Spidey turned all smiles… that was, until he saw what he had to sign. His mask eyes bulged. "Whoa wait a sec! How'd you get this?"_

"_My sister took the picture." He smiled. "She said you looked so 'cute' in pink."_

_Spider-Man groaned at the realization that pictures of him in Starfire's makeover attire existed. Cyborg and Beast Boy pointed and laughed as they watched Spidey deflate. The arachnoid then turned to Robin and Raven who only smirked lightly as they slowly rolled their eyes at Starfire. Our favorite alien began to laugh nervously. _

"_So not cool…"_

"Hahaha! You should've seen your face." Beast Boy chuckled. Spider-Man groaned at the memory but suddenly looked up. "Wait, how the heck could you have seen my face?"

All eyes were on Beast Boy.

He squirmed. "Um… whoa look that's us on T.V.!"

--

(The scene changed to a shot of Robin sitting in a chair while he stared at his interviewer off screen.)

April: "So tell us Robin, as the leader of the Titans how has it been working with this new team member?"

Robin: "Uh… it's been great actually. The guy knows his stuff. I mean we could talk about adhesive binding trackers all day. You see the first problem we came about discussing was…"

(Robin's voice was suddenly cut-off)

April: (Voice Over) "Shortening this answer basically Robin thinks Spider-Man is a great asset to the team."

--

"They cut me off!" Robin growled. The rest of the Titans laughed.

"Whoa you really captivated her Boy Blunder." Raven smirked.

"…"

"Take it easy boss, some people just can't understand the beauty of adhesive tracking systems." Spider-Man replied.

Raven nodded. "'Some' people? Why don't you try 'most' people?"

Robin sighed.

--

(It was now Beast Boy's turn.)

April: "So what do you think about your new partner?"

Beast Boy: "Totally awesome dudes. Not many people understand my complex thinking like he does."

April: "Uh… complex thinking?"

BB: "Yea! We have really deep discussions."

April: "Like…"

BB: "Um like how much water to put in a balloon to make the 'perfect water balloon'! You know! That kinda stuff."

April: "Right…"

(The scene cuts to Starfire, who was as usual smiling brilliantly.)

Starfire: "I believe Spider-Man is a wonderful friend and has the personality of a true bongorf! It is very fun to do the 'hanging out' with him."

April: "Starfire, um don't you say that about everyone?"

Starfire: (thinks) "I assume so… is that not good?"

April: "Yea..."

(Cyborg was now on screen staring at the camera with thumbs up.)

Cyborg: "Man, what can I say? The dude is a damn genius. Pure genius, I mean I even let him tune up my 'baby' that guy is so smart. And let me tell ya the T-car has never run better. NEVER!"

--

**Here Come Those Blurry Effects Again…**

"_Come on you can't be serious." Beast Boy grumbled as he turned his head towards Spider-Man._

"_How come I can't be serious?" The arachnoid replied while stirring something in a test tube. The mixture of red became a dark blue. "Cy, I think I got it."_

_Beast Boy shook his head. "Look there's just no way Optimus Prime can beat Voltron in a fair fight."_

"_Sure he can." Spider-Man nodded as he continued to work on the solvent. Cyborg who was under the T-car's belly groaned. "That's a pointless argument fellas,"_

_Cyborg chuckled. "Because I am a better fighting machine than both of them put together."_

_Beast Boy and Spider-Man sweat dropped as they watched Cyborg slide out from under his 'baby' with that signature super-sized grin._

"_Alright, now where's that stuff you said would give the T-car some kick?"_

_Spider-Man took the test tube and held it up. "This stuff will do the trick. Helps with the combustion process," Spidey grinned as he stared at the deep blue solvent. "And thank you Doc Conners." _

_Cyborg shot his hand out like a grappling hook and gently took the solvent. In a quick retract he examined it. "So I pour this into the fuel tank and it'll take care of itself?" _

"_Yea," Spider-Man nodded. "In theory anyway,"_

"_In theory?" Cyborg gasped. "Man if anything happens to my car I'll-"_

"_Don't worry nothing will happen to your 'baby'. Just give it a shot."_

_Cyborg gave him a questioning glare but his curiosity over came him. So down went the solvent and now came time for the test of all tests. The T-Car was brought outdoors, right in front of the Cy's gigantic garage.  
_

"_I'm driving!" Beast Boy yelled as he made a dive for the wheel. Cyborg quickly shoved him across to the passenger's seat and scowled._

"_No, you got shotgun."_

"_Dude, I never get to do anything cool." BB crossed his arms. Spider-Man only grinned as he hopped in the back seat. "Start it up chrome dome."_

_The engine roared to life as Cyborg started the initiation sequence. BB and Spidey shook as the T-Car growled like a tiger. Cyborg nodded in approval. "Oh yeah now that's what I'm talkin' about!"_

"_Um, I think I wanna get out now." Beast Boy muttered only to no avail. Spider-Man and Cyborg looked at one another and gave each other the thumbs up._

"_Alright baby, we're going to put the pedal to the metal!"_

"_Wait hold up Cy, I don't thi-"_

_Cyborg didn't listen. The gas was driven to the max and the three were sent on the ride of their lives. After ten seconds of eyeballs being sucked into their skulls, mouths being forced wide open, and stomachs being left a couple of blocks back, Cyborg stopped the madness. The breaks brought the car to a long screech halt and spun 360 degrees. And then there was only silence._

"_Whooooa." Beast Boy gasped as his eyes were rolled to the back of his head. Spider-Man stuttered a similar comment as he turned to Cyborg who was a bit shocked as well. The three Titans looked at one another and sighed._

_It was officially explosion time!_

"_BOOYAH!" _

"_OH MAN THAT WAS SO AWESOME!"_

"_DUDE LET'S DO IT AGAIN!"_

"_WOOHOO!"_

_After an exchange of mischievous grins it came to pass. T-car madness had officially begun. _

"Man, that was crazy." Cyborg smiled. Spider-Man nodded. "I knew that stuff would do the trick."

"Shhh friends! Raven is speaking!" Starfire pouted.

"Oh dude I gotta hear this." Beast Boy smirked. Raven only rolled her eyes in annoyance to much of her friend's distinct pleasure.

--

(The segment cuts to Raven who as always had that dead pan look on her face. She sat in a completely indifferent manner waiting for this drivel to be over with.)

April: "So how would you sum up your feelings of your new teammate?"

Raven: (looked to the ground as if she was thinking.) Um, I guess I could say, it's been 'interesting'."

(Raven sighed)

Raven: "But a little too interesting if you ask me."

--

**Can't Get Enough Of That Blur Apparently…**

_The Titans stood victorious over Atlas who was slouched over and drained of power. They apparently found something amusing as the majority of the team was laughing._

"_No seriously guys!" Spider-Man pouted. "He does look like one of those robots from Mega Man right?" _

"_What is this Mega Man? Is he anything like the 'Superman' with the pretty red cape?"_

"_No, Star. Mega Man is just… I dunno, Mega Man!" Beast Boy replied. _

"_Sure he did look like one, but did you see his face when you told him that?" Cyborg laughed. Robin nodded along. "Yea, any focus he had was gone. Nice tactic."_

_Spider-Man raised a brow. "Tactic?" He slapped his head. "Oh right, tactic. Yea…"_

_Cyborg shook his head. "Too funny."_

_The half-droid's eyes suddenly caught Raven who was as always the only one with the 'cool' front. He groaned. "Oh come on Rae, even you gotta admit that was funny! COME ON! Mega Man!"_

_Raven sighed. "It wasn't that funny."_

_Spider-Man walked over to Raven with his arms crossed. "Yea guys! Totally not funny!" _

_This only brought out more laughs as the Titans watched Raven's reaction. Spidey received a scowl that brought chills down his spine and he backed off. "Come on Raven is it too much to ask for you just to laugh?"_

_Beast Boy smirked. "Dude, you don't even know."_

_Spidey chuckled as he glared at Raven. "Hmm, I bet if I tried I can make you laugh out loud."_

_The Titans looked at one another in a snicker. Raven just gave that as usual annoyed look. _

_Beast Boy huffed. "Hah, there's no way, I've been trying forever. It's impossible."_

"_Nothing's impossible."_

"_Maybe, but this is as close as it gets." BB said. Spider-Man nodded. "Alright then, let's make this a bet."_

_Beast Boy's eyes lit up. "Let's hear it."_

"_If I can make Raven laugh with one joke, you have to do the dishes on my turn this week. If I lose? Vice versa." _

"_Dude one joke? Hah, you're so on." They shook hands._

"_Spidey, I think you're totally out of your league on this one." Cyborg muttered._

"_Oh I got this." Spider-Man muttered as he scratched his chin, analyzing Raven's annoyed facial expression. "Hmmm," he began to stroll around Raven striking a barrage of over exaggerated thinking positions. "I could go with a knock knock joke, but that won't be enough will it?"_

_Raven groaned. "Let's just say Beast Boy wins and go home. This is so-"_

"_Heh! I think I got it." Spider-Man nodded. "I'll do an impression."_

"_. . ."_

_Spider-Man quickly took a peak at his surroundings in attempt to find something. His pseudo eyes lit up as he apparently accomplished his goal. With a blast and retract of a web line that 'something' was in his grasp. It was a trash can lid._

_The Titans looked on with obliviousness._

_Spidey cleared his throat. "See if you guys can't guess who this is."_

_He quickly grabbed the tin can lid and put it over his head. He looked around and grinned as he suddenly exploded with one word that would bring the house down…_

"_BOOYAH!"_

_There was a pause as the Titans looked at one another with enlarged eyes. They all looked at Cyborg and then turned to Spider-Man, small cracks of smiles began to form. Tears then fell in relentless amounts, tears of only laughter of course._

"_BWAHAHAHA!" Beast Boy grabbed his stomach. "Oh man, a Cyborg impression."_

_Cyborg shook his head while laughing. "You're lucky that was pretty funny. Because if it wasn't? You'd be so knocked out right now!"_

_Robin slowed down his chuckles. "Stop please, my sides hurt." _

_Starfire clapped in approval. "Friend Raven did you not think that was 'a funny'?"_

_All eyes turned expecting to see Raven, but they were met with nothing. The Titans scratched their heads. "Gah, she didn't even stay for the joke!" Spider-Man groaned._

_Beast Boy raised a brow. "Sorry but, I think I won dude."_

_Spider-Man looked over towards Beast Boy and sighed. "Damnation."_

_From across the city Raven reappeared in front of a small group of kids. It was silent as she knelt with her hood covering her face. The children stopped their game of baseball as an alien sound began to creep from within Raven's mouth. She began to chuckle attempting desperately to hold it all in. But in the end she failed miserably and the children were 'freaked out' to say the least. _

_Apparently Spider-Man won the bet. But obviously, no one was ever going to know. That's Spidey for ya, luckiest man in the world._

Spider-Man scowled bringing himself back to the present. "Admit it Raven you thought that joke was funny!"

Eyes roll.

"Dude, get over it you lost. Raven doesn't do 'funny'." Beast Boy nodded. Raven nodded.

"So, not everything that goes through your head is dropped like a bad habit after all."

Spider-Man chuckled as Beast Boy griped. "Hah, well that was 'funny'."

--

April: "So we've heard from heroes around the world, we've heard from his fans, we've heard from his very own teammates. But after all this we finally had the chance to speak with the 'man' himself."

(The segment was cut to Spidey who sat cross legged and totally relaxed in front of the camera.)

April: "So tell us Spider-Man, how is it being a new member of the Teen Titans and seemingly fitting in so well?"

Spider-Man: (chin scratch) "It's been fun. I mean hanging out with these cool cats is awesome. Two thumbs up!"

April: "So no complaints?"

Spider-Man: "Um, besides that little initiation thing with the rubber duck? Nope, not really."

April: "Rubber duck?"

Spider-Man: "Yea, you see…"

April: "Never mind, I don't think we want to know."

Spider-Man: "I agree."

April: "So how did you come about being a super hero anyway?"

Spider-Man: "Well… I could just say I was bitten by a genetically enhanced spider but that would be boring wouldn't it? So I think I'm going to say that I am part of an alien race born from within the sun, and I've come to exterminate all those pesky ants in your world preventing the end of your species."

April: "You can't be serious."

Spider-Man: "Truthfully? I don't even know anymore."

April: "Alrighty then… uh how was your child hood?"

Spider-Man: "Well as a wee lad my mother, a tarantula by the way, used to baby me like a total momma's boy. My father, a black widow, used to-"

April: (Scowl) "Are you going to take this interview seriously?"

Spider-Man: "Wait, I thought I was."

April: (Sighs) "Ooookay, let's just go to final thoughts. Anything you would like to say to the viewers?"

Spider-Man: (turns to camera) "Uuuh, let's see. Always shower, don't get in cars with strangers, and take your vitamins and minerals. Oh yeah and when there's trouble you know who to call."

April: "Teen Titans?"

Spider-Man: "Well I was thinking Ghost Busters but that'll do."

(There was a loud groan.)

April: "I… I can't take this anymore."

(April grabbed her face in annoyance and walked off the set. Spidey looked away and turned back to the camera in a shrug.)

Spider-Man: "Uuuuh… am I done?"

(Spidey whistled as it was uncomfortably silent. He began to bounce his head as if techno music was playing in the background. The show fades back to our two favorite anchormen with them being totally silent.)

John: "Uh… was it supposed to end like that?"

Walter: "I guess so… well anyway! We'll be right back after this commercial break."

John: (Low volume) "Someone is so getting fired…"

( - H.I.V.E. Headquarters - )

The T.V. was on and cranked up all the way. Apparently everyone was watching this particular segment on Spider-Man and the Titans. Yes, even the bad guys. And the one who was closest to the monitor was surely a 'bad guy' in the most extreme sense. A really really really 'bad guy' folks.

"Have fun with your new friends while you can Petey old pal," Venom grinned with his serrated fangs fully exposed. "Because your time is almost up!"

With that the black symbiote suddenly slammed his clawed hand into the T.V. monitor destroying it in a brilliant flash of light. Glass shattered and sparks sprayed, slowly dissipating as they hit the tiled floor. Venom stood with his pseudo eyes glaring upon the destructive results of his temper tantrum and it became completely silent. But as well all know, these never last very long.

"Venom, jeez you seriously have problems." Carnage grumbled with a set of playing cards in front of him.

"Yea, and that was my tube you just wrecked!" Mammoth growled. "You better be ready to pay me back!"

Venom turned to his seated H.I.V.E. mates with that sick smile these symbiotes were so infamous for and let out a warped screech as his tongue lashed out. After that threatening display Mammoth just scratched his head while laughing nervously.

"Alright an 'I.O.U.' will do just fine." The large metahuman back pedaled.

Jinx smiled at Venom who returned the glare with a shrug. "Aw come on Venny poo, cheer up and join the fun."

The black symbiote cringed at the name as his male 'friends' began to point and laugh at him.

"Yea 'Venny Poo', why don't you go take a seat next to Jinx?" Carnage sniggered as Gizmo and Mammoth replied with suggestive chuckling. Venom scowled just ignoring the 'madness' and stood cross armed in deep thought.

Carnage, who was also wearing his as usual ugly grin, scoffed. "Okay enough of this crapola. GAME ON!"

Gizmo nodded. "Yea you pit sniffers, I'd actually like to get this game over with in this century."

"Heh well if it isn't, at least you might have some hair by the time we're done." Jinx giggled.

The H.I.V.E. members laughed at Gizmo who only muttered angrily under his breath. The newly formed evil super group, excluding Venom, sat at a round table that was just perfect for card games. And being the intelligent little teens they were, that was exactly what they were using this table for – one blisteringly exciting card game of 'Go Fish'!

"Alright… I know you gotta have… a FIVE!" Mammoth screamed towards Carnage who held his cards tightly against his face. The red symbiote snickered. "GO FISH BITCH! HAH!"

"Dammit!" Mammoth grumbled as he pulled another card out. Jinx and Gizmo only groaned as Carnage was on the verge of winning yet again. Apparently they hadn't noticed the peaking red tendrils that this psychopath had been using to his advantage.

Venom only scoffed at the sight while he glared. He apparently was the most anxious to free himself from this little charade of hiding. With these three new allies that the symbiotes have reluctantly formed a bond with, they were more than prepared to defeat the Titans, including Spider-Man.

Yes people, a group of 'Five Fearsome' teens have been formed, molded by Blood himself to take out Jump City's finest. And in the minds of these H.I.V.E. students, the era of the Teen Titans was coming closer to an end with each passing second.

Tick… tock… tick… tock… tick… tock… BOOM!

Suddenly a red dart slammed into the coo coo clock above and sighs of relief came from all about the room.

"Dude, nice freakin' call." Mammoth replied.

"Yea, that thing was driving me insane." Gizmo scowled.

Carnage nodded. "No problem, now let's finish this game! My mandatory hours of innocent death and destruction starts at 7:00…"


	6. Gettin' School'd Symbiote Style

**A/N: **First, thanks for the reviews guys! I appreciate it a lot! Second, the Headmistress I am using in this chapter is not the one from the 'show'. This is 'comic'/my other fanfic inspired so don't faint on me.

--

Here's some food for thought…

What came first, the chicken or the egg?

Is there truly life after death?

What is the true meaning of our existence?

Does God really exist?

Is there any beneficial use of the Pythagorean Theorem in our practical lives?

Who would win in a battle of pure wits, Dr. Doom or Brainiac?

Who would win in a battle of pure stupidity, Hulk or Bizarro?

How does that Energizer Bunny keep going and going?

Do you really suppose that Fabio truly 'Can't believe that it's not butter'?

And seriously for the love of all that lives… just who really did freakin' let the dogs out anyway?

(Sighs)

Anyway, these are the questions that will forever plague our minds – twisting and bending our very psyches to the brink of utter destruction. Oh yes! These innocent little debates we have in our thick skulled heads that you all think are harmless thoughts? They will lead to total chaos, anarchy, and eventually the End of the World!

MUHAHAHAHA!

(Cue Thunder Strikes)

Okay, so maybe that is a bit hyperbole. But like all questions these questions deserve answers! That is the way of our curious human psyche after all – always testing ourselves with impossible questions that will never be answered. Well, in only coincidental synchronicity of course, our favorite mind controlling evil school leader this side of the west coast was being put to the test. Oh yea, being put to the test by someone that held even more power than the one and only Headmaster Blood himself.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the Headmistress of the infamous H.I.V.E. Academy… Adeline Kane.

(Cheers)

The H.I.V.E. was a strong influence in this crazy world. Their limitless recourses stretched across the U.S.A and this woman that sat before Blood funded most of it. She was the Bill Gates of the evil world one could say. But at the same time one must remember that they shared one fundamental difference.

Money wasn't the only reason one would want to date this hot vixen of a mature woman.

She was a bombshell for the older folks for sure. Defying the laws of aging such as Demi Moore, this woman kept the curves and would still make male eyes swerve. Even our Brother Blood was a bit shaky in her presence. Believe it or not, our always 'cool' under pressure Headmaster always stood shakily when it came to her - although a large part of that unease was probably due to his school boy crush.

Pure evil he was folks.

But pure man he was also.

Adeline sighed out of boredom. "So Headmaster Blood, I've been hearing great things of your two newest students."

Blood nodded a bit nervously as his superior was being displayed via satellite on his large Hi-definition screen.

"They uh deserve the praises Headmistress." Blood nodded. "They have impressed me enough."

"I can assume that quite easily." The black haired woman smirked. "Although I am still a bit skeptical my successor."

"But Headmistress, didn't you see the tapes of the first battle test I sent you?"

"Yes dear, but it arrived a bit later than you informed me."

"Blast!" Blood growled over zealously as if he had sinned God himself. "I knew I should've used Fed Ex! My apologies…"

Headmistress Kane adjusted her stylish bifocals on screen while she shook her head in a friendly matter. "Oh no matter my dear, you've been loyal and productive enough to be forgiven. Besides I've seen the tape. Impressive to say the least,"

Blood smiled gaining a bit of confidence.

"Of course, I would never disappoint you. My eye for talent never ceases to amaze me." Blood brushed off his sleeve.

"Funny, your arrogance does the exact same thing to me." She countered wittily.

Blood chuckled nervously but quickly put on that mask of self-belief all villains were required to have.

"Arrogance is such a 'negative' term Headmistress. I personally like to call it 'confidence'."

She smiled. "Oh call it what you will Bloody dear, but I must say I am intrigued by these two new students of yours. The H.I.V.E. Academy on the east coast always out performed your school when it comes to talent."

Blood scowled angrily. "Well that trend will end. Carnage and Venom are twice the students that school can put out."

"Hmm, I must agree with you from watching that tape." Addie nodded. "They obliterated your obstacle course."

"Yes they did, didn't they?"

(Flashback)

_The giant H.I.V.E stadium was being filled to the max with incoming students. There were familiar faces everywhere and this was no surprise. If you were an evil doing teen in Jump City this was 'the place' to be after all. And these H.I.V.E. members of new and old were in for a treat, for they were about to witness a battle test that would rock the foundation of this establishment._

_Literally!_

"_I wonder how they are going to do." Jinx pondered._

"_They're gonna stink it up, duh." Gizmo replied. "No one does diddly squat on the first try."_

"_Yea, we totally sucked." Mammoth added._

"_We didn't do that bad." Gizmo retorted. "Well actually maybe you did." _

Jinx giggled at Mammoth's angry glare as the three H.I.V.E sat in their usual front row seats, being tops in their class. She took a peak around the arena. "What's taking those two so long?"

"_Probably chickened out," Gizmo guessed. "No one can run this obstacle course with a two man team. Right M?"_

_Mammoth was obviously preoccupied. "Where's that damn popcorn guy?" _

"_You're thinking about food, heh, that's a surprise." Gizmo insulted. The soul patched meta-human only grinned. _

"At least you admitted that I can think now! Woohoo!"

_Gizmo gasped at the realization. "Uh, can I take that back?"_

_Jinx quickly interrupted. "Hey look! It's them!"_

_Students from all rows began to take notice of our two symbiotes in human form as they were stretching confidently. Jinx took a gander at the two and smiled._

"_So that's what they look like under those masks." she then eyed the one of them more specifically. "The one in black is sorta… cute."_

_Mammoth and Gizmo only sweat dropped._

_--_

"_Can this place get anymore damn yellow?" Venom noticed the surrounding amber walls. _

Carnage shrugged. "Meh, it's going to be stained with blood pretty soon anyway."

"… _Good point."_

"_Gee, just look at us dad." Carnage glared. "We're the center of attention!"_

"_Whoopee!" _

Sarcasm obviously showed that Venom couldn't wait for this worthless crap to be over.

Carnage sighed as he stretched. "You know for a symbiote you're really freaking lame? Have some fun with this sheesh. You've been shit company ever since we got here." he paused. "Come to think of it you've always been shit company!"

"_Why whatever do you mean?" Venom mocked. "We're having a blast can't you tell?" he forced a half-assed smile._

_Carnage laughed. "Now that's better!"_

_Venom only shook his head while rolling his eyes. Suddenly the voice of Brother Blood exploded through the arena speakers._

"**_Alright Carnage, Venom are you two prepared?"_**

"_Do we have to be?" Venom shrugged. Carnage nodded. "Hell yea! Bring on the victims baby! Ow!"_

"**_Okay on the count of three you two will begin."_**

_Carnage skewed. "Um when you say on the count of three, do you mean 'on three'? Or will it be like 1, 2, 3, and then go? Or will-"  
_

"_Oh God will you just start the freaking thing already?" _

**"Very well then… 1… 2… 3… BEGIN!"**

_A loud buzzer sounded off and the two symbiotes stood ready for whatever was to come. Suddenly platforms and pillars started to move at random and Venom groaned at the sight.  
_

"_What the hell is this? A damn Mario videogame?"_

_A rumble was then heard and out of the rising pillars came black and white H.I.V.E robo-soldiers ready to deal out some major pain. Venom and Carnage moped at the mere presence of these metallic morons._

"_Shit, I was expecting 'live' victims here." Carnage saddened.  
_

_Behind the robots appeared another barrage of pillars only these had tentacles that flailed recklessly prepared to make minced meat out of our duo of symbiotes. _

"_Whoa, Doc Ock alert eh Venom?"_

_Venom was about to reply but noted that numerous panels in the honeycomb wall began to open, loaded with missiles ready to fire. The symbiotes looked at one another with an indifferent shrug. _

"Let's rip this place apart pops."

"_You just read our mind." _

Venom and Carnage's voices began to warp and distort as they spoke, letting that sluggish ooze that has brought nightmares to many run down their faces. Gasps of disgust came from the teenage crowd while the two started to laugh like utter maniacs. White eyes, claws, and teeth began to form and with screeches of the high pitched nature, our two symbiotes were now ready to handle their business.

_--_

"_Damn…" Mammoth mumbled, echoing the thoughts of the hundred or so H.I.V.E. members watching in pure repulsion yet amazement. There was dead silence as the 'kids' got their first look at symbiotes in their work clothes. Gizmo's jaw dropped along side his partners as they shook their heads in denial at the mere sight of the serrated teeth dripping with green saliva._

"_Bleh." Mammoth grimaced.  
_

"_That is freakin' disgusting." Gizmo complained._

_  
"Yea, I just hope for their sakes that they're as good as they're ugly." Mammoth added._

"_Ugly?" Jinx seemed offended. "I think that black one looks… totally cool."_

_Gizmo and Mammoth slowly looked over to Jinx who was leaned over on the railing with her chin buried into her hands. She had such a funny look on her face they swore they saw her eyes turn into hearts. The duo then gave each other a stare of horror and disgust at this realization. _

The two H.I.V.E boys fell over simultaneously.

_--_

"_Oh man," Venom's tongue slithered out. "This feels freaking great."_

"_Yeah, I think I was getting withdrawals not being at my ugliest."_

"_Alright," Venom cracked his neck. "Let's go."_

_Carnage nodded "Oh yeah, I think it's about time we turn this place into a scrap heap!"_

_And of course when Carnage wants a scrap heap, a scrap heap was what he was going to get - regardless. The symbiotes gave each other one last mutual nod before unleashing their unrivaled aggression, using it to literally rip this course to shreds. In seconds robotic arms and limbs started to soar across the arena, sending circuitry spraying out from the dismembered metal parts. Heads of course soon followed that trend.  
_

_Tendrils clashed with tentacles and webbing wrapped up missiles. Explosions echoed, metals crushed, and mouths were dropped wide-open as Venom and Carnage tore through the course with sickening laughs. Of course they would be laughing. Symbiotes lived for this kind of stuff. Destruction was a staple in their devilish background and these two cherished that more so than even their normal counterparts. _

_With a toss of the last remaining obliterated robot Venom groaned. "Dude these toys suck."_

"_Uh huh," Carnage agreed. "These things make those Spider Slayers look like Galactus." _

The two took notice of the blank stares that filled the arena and shrugged.

"_We guess we're done." Our black symbiote quickly web slung his way over to the finish line indifferently and with a flip and a foot plant he was resting on the final post. The buzzer went off signaling their completion and Venom morphed back into human form as he looked out to the silenced crowd._

"**_Uh… congratulations you two… you have set a new course record. 45… seconds."_**

_The H.I.V.E students were more silent then before. But that was suddenly broken as cheers began to erupt at this accomplishment. Venom took the cheering with his usual apathy. "Yay, we're being cheered for. We're so happy we're going to totally not give a hoot!" _

The black symbiote then took a bored glance around looking for Carnage. After a few seconds he finally found his 'kid'' and of course our crimson symbiote was doing his usual 'Carnage' thing. Over Excessive Violence!

"_DIE! DIE! DIE! HAHAHA!" Carnage screamed as he was stabbing an already downed robot's head repeatedly with his symbiotic blade.  
_

"_Uh Carnage we're done already."_

_Venom only fell on deaf ears._

_Stab._

"_Carnage."_

_Stab._

"_Carnage."_

_Stab._

"_CARNAGE!"_

"_What?" _

"_We're done."_

"_Oh," Carnage snickered. "Cool." _

Of course the stabbing continued.

"DIE!"

_  
Stab!_

_Stab!_

_Stab!_

_Stab!_

_Stab!_

_Venom grabbed his face. "Idiot…" _

(End Flashback)

"Yes, it was quite a display." Headmistress recalled. "But combat is only one prerequisite of a true graduate Blood. There are many things I look for in a student."

"But of course. I assure you these students are impressive in everyway."

"Please, enlighten me."

"Well they have charisma. Take the first day of classes for example. They're introductions were very… uh… unique yet they moved the students like no one else ever has." Blood coughed.

"Oh really?"

(Flashback II: The Symbiotes Strike Back)

_Carnage slowly walked up to the front of the classroom as his best bud Venom just had his turn introducing himself. After about 20 minutes of trying to get the class to understand why he says 'We' and 'Us', Venom finally gave up and sat down. Of course Jinx was staring at him all the while in her adjacent desk at him as if she was literally burning a hole through his head._

"_Alright Mr. Carnage, the floor is yours." Blood informed._

"_Why thank you 'Head'master." Carnage chuckled. "Okay… where to start… where to start. Oh yea! My name is Carnage. I feel like I'm about uh… sixteen give or take. My pet peeves are victims that don't scream, victims that don't beg, and victims that faint before I get the chance to gut them. You gotta see their suffering eyes ya know?"_

" _. . . " The class was speechless._

"_Hmm what else? What else? Oh yeah my hobbies! Let's start with my old childhood favorite… Evisceration!"_

"_What the hell?" Gizmo and Mammoth yelled in disgust on behalf of the class._

"_Eviceration… ya know… do I really need to explain it?"_

_Blood tried to intervene. "Well you don't-"_

"_Oh but I'd love to! You see first you take a blade right? Then-"_

_(Five minutes of the most disgusting descriptions one could imagine filled with blood, guts, and all that symbiote killing goodness followed.)_

"_And that kiddies is the pure beauty of a good-"_

"_Uh Carnage we think you lost your audience." Venom noted as he was the only one left sitting in the room._

"_What?"_

"_Yea, we think they're all in the bathroom. They were all getting pretty green."_

"_Darn and I was just going to get to my love for poetry and long walks on the beach too!"_

"_Oh we think they'll get over it."_

(End Flashback)

Brother Blood gulped in remembrance of those descriptions feeling a bit queasy in the stomach.

"Blood?"

"Uh… yes?"

"How about their study skills? Are they excellent students? How well are they getting along with their classmates?"

"Oh they have great study habits and command great respect!"

(Flashback III: Return of The Symbiote)

_"Hah, I'm totally kickin' your ass!" Gizmo celebrated._

_Venom only growled pathetically as he was fighting a losing battle. Yes, even this always confident symbiote would admit he was getting his butt kicked. What exactly was this a battle of you ask? Well it was one of pure wits and concentration. It was one of determination and perseverance. It was one of honor and respect!_

_Yes people, it was a battle fought on a turf we can all relate to. _

_The videogaming world!_

_Boops and beeps filled the room as Gizmo and Venom were locked in a gladiator-like struggle for bragging rights. Two controllers, a Gamestation, and a copy of Final Fantasy XXII: The Fighting Game equals intense! And honestly the action was as intense as intense gets. _

Jinx and Mammoth looked on in chuckles as Venom's 'losing' facial expressions were purely comical.(O.o, o.O, O.O, X (, X o, etc.)

_Carnage would have been persecuting his pop's total suckage of course but he was busy at the moment. Our fav crimson symbiote sat at a desktop surfing the net. He was doing an assignment actually... yes this was the type of 'work' that Carnage could say he thoroughly enjoyed. Being evil was fun! Learning how to be more evil is even more fun! _

_You see kids there are plenty of classes to choose from at the H.I.V.E. academy. Such as 'World Domination 106', and 'Criminal Injustice 103' for instance. But Carnage was doing neither at this point. The saying goes like this - 'Keep your friends close, but keep your enemies closer'. And to do that one must know your enemy… and that is exactly what this class was about - 'Know Your Enemy 101'._

_Click._

"_Ok… Green Lantern…" he read. "Blah blah blah crap."_

_Click._

"… _Batman…" he skimmed. "Blah blah blah crap."_

_Click. _

"Martian Manhunter… whoa that's a mouthful…" he half assed it. "Blah blah blah… mega crap."

_Click._

"_Whoa!" Carnage laughed. "Yo pops I think I found someone even more lame than Captain America."_

"_That's impossible." Venom semi-replied as his virtual fighter Rikku was getting a thorough ass kicking from Gizmo's counterpart, Sephiroth. Venom sighed, "Uh what's the name?"_

"_Superman." _

Venom paused. "Okay maybe it's possible."

"_Oh you don't want to mess with him." Jinx replied._

_Mammoth agreed. "Yea, he's one of the big dogs on the goodie goodie side." _

"Uh yea, his costume is really making me shake in fear'." Carnage chuckled with sarcasm as he turned to his H.I.V.E. mates. "By the way what is up with heroes in your dimension and their love for wearing underwear on the outside?"

"_Maybe they think it's cute?" Jinx suggested. _

"Better circulation maybe?" Venom chimed in. Mutual shrugs from Gizmo and Mammoth.

"_Riiiight." Carnage turned back to his 'work'. _

_Click._

"_NO!" _

_Apparently our Venom had lost._

"_Sorry pit sniffer, but no one beats Sephiroth."_

_Venom groaned in defeat. "Well, at least our fighter looked way hotter." _

"_Holy crap!" Carnage screamed freezing the room again. The other H.I.V.E. mates glared. _

"She… so… pretty." He droned as his eyes were stuck in gawk mode on the computer screen.

"Pretty?" Venom quickly strolled over on his roller seat and glanced as well. His white pseudo eyes bulged, mimicking his counterpart at the mere sight on screen. Our two symbiotes were now officially mesmerized.

"_What a freaking babe." Venom muttered with his serpentine tongue hanging limp from his wide open jaws. _

Gizmo and Mammoth quickly took their glances and their eyes turned to hearts.

"_Oh yeah… Wonder Woman…" Mammoth sighed._

"_Shit, what I'd give to spend a day with her." Gizmo dreamed. _

"_Wonder Woman huh?" Carnage smiled disgustingly. "Well baby you got your Wonder Man right here!"_

"_Gah! Where is she?" Venom growled as he turned to the other H.I.V.E. members._

_Mammoth scratched his head. "In space I think, with the Justice League."_

_Venom nodded. "Then what the shit are we doing here? Let's go meet her!"_

"_Hell you got my vote!" Carnage agreed while nodding maniacally._

"_We're in!" Gizmo and Mammoth added. They were all about to take off but suddenly all four chairs went 'dud' and fell apart right on the spot. Our four male H.I.V.E. members groaned as they got a good taste of the hard tiled ground. Jinx's eyes faded from pink and she shook her head from jealously and anger. _

"_Boys…"_

(End Flashback)

"Are you sure you're not building these students up more than you should?"

"Of course not Headmistress." Blood's head shook. "I would do no such thing."

Adeline scowled. "Alright, then how are they doing academically? How is their behavior?"

"Simply amazing and their test scores rival the best of my students. Their conduct is quite impressive actually."

"Little angels?"

Blood froze. "Well… maybe not angels."

(Flashback IV: Not Another Symbiote Movie)

"_I am done Mr. Blood." The young African American female in the 'Bee'utiful costume stood._

"_Well done Bumble Bee." Brother Blood nodded. "The first to finish as always."_

"_I learn from the best Headmaster." Bumble Bee smiled._

_She wouldn't be smiling too much longer._

"_AGH!" She yelled as she felt her mickey mouse hair become entangled. She reached up to find out the cause and her hand became stuck as well. Chuckles from the back were heard and she growled at the two cacklers._

"_Venom! That wasn't funny!"_

_Carnage looked away in a whistle while Venom shrugged. "Hey, we didn't do anything. You have no proof."_

_Bumble Bee growled. "It's web… you're the only one who would do this!"_

_Venom shook his head. "Not true!" he turned to Fang who was making out with Kitten shamelessly. "Fang shoots web too ya know."_

_Bumble Bee was steaming over now and turned to Blood. "Headmaster!"_

_Blood shook his head. "Sorry my dear I do believe it was just an accident… you're excused from class to do what you need to do."_

_Our insect princess turned to Venom in an angry scowl as she stormed out of the classroom. Venom and Carnage looked at one another and chuckled. "God we hate teacher's pets."_

"_Heh that was a nice shot Venom. Nice shot." Carnage whispered as they both went back to the task at hand._

_  
The tick tocks of the clock echoed loudly into the symbiotes' ears as they sat sweating bullets. Venom let out a sigh as he stared at one of the questions on the test._

_It read: 'If a nuclear warhead is heading south at 145 mph, and twenty scud missiles are heading parallel to the warhead at the same speed and their trajectory is changing 1 degree towards the warhead at the exponential level. When will the two meet causing an end to all life on earth?'  
_

_Venom shook his head from the headache as he turned to Carnage who was seated next to him in a pathetic glare. His counterpart didn't look like he was doing much better as his eraser marks filled his work space, not to mention all the pencils he's snapped out of anger. They began their empathic speak._

'_Pops, I knew we should've studied.'_

'_Yea, we should've. But even if we wanted to we couldn't. That Jinx girl was clinging on to us like a vice.'_

'_Heh. That's my pops. Already hitting it off with the ladies! Dude you know you now officially have an interdimensional girlfriend?'_

'_Sorry but we're not interested.'_

'_Why not she's totally cute and to top it off… she actually 'likes' you. How many girls do you know that you can say that about?"_

_Venom paused as Carnage got him with a tough question._

'_Look dad, she's even staring at you now.' _

Venom sighed as he slowly peaked to his left and noticed Jinx with that 'funny' stare once again. The black symbiote groaned as he turned back to Carnage who was smiling his ugly smile. Our crimson madman began to make hoot noises only to be shhh'd by Blood.

'_Will you calm the hell down you dumb shit?' Venom grumbled. 'Anyway, we got an idea. You see baldy down there?'_

_They both looked at Gizmo who was, like always, breezing through the test in a bored manner._

"_Uh huh.' Carnage nodded evilly. 'Read you loud and clear dad.'_

_With the slyness of the devil, the two symbiotes sent two spying tendrils that crept low to the floor. Carnage's tendril tapped Gizmo on the shoulder causing him to look left while Venom's tendril soaked in as much information as possible. This was repeated twice more and Gizmo was totally clueless._

"_What the crud!" Gizmo turned and looked around to see Venom and Carnage looking at their tests while whistling. Carnage gave him a thumbs up while whispering. "Awesome test."_

_Gizmo skewed._

_Blood cleared his throat. "Mr. Gizmo is there a problem?"_

"_Uh… no Headmaster… it's nothing." Gizmo scowled as he continued with his test while the peeping tendrils kept doing their thing. A few minutes pass and our Gizmo was finally done. He was about to raise his hand to signal his completion but two other hands beat him to the punch._

"_We're done!" Venom and Carnage said in unison as they leapt over to Blood's table all the while stepping on other students and tossed their tests in his face._

"_Great test!" Venom complimented._

"_Oh yeah!" Carnage agreed._

"_Uh... thank you."_

"_Can we go now?" Carnage smiled as innocently as he could although that symbiote ugliness sure wasn't helping._

_Blood blinked. "I believe so..." _

"Sweet, that little bee couldn't have gotten too far away." Venom snickered.

"_Yea, let's go have some more fun with her!" Carnage grinned. "Later Brotha!" _

Our two symbiotes then took off for more cherished Bumble Bee torment.

(End Flashback)

"So I understand now. These are your best students ever."

Blood nodded. "Exactly Headmistress."

"Do you believe they are enough to take down those annoying Titans?" Adeline scowled.

Blood laughed. "More than enough… besides, I have our three previous top students aiding as well."

"Oh?"

"Yes Headmistress, with those five combined as one force there is no stopping them."

"Hmm, interesting Brother Blood, very interesting I must say."

The Headmaster grinned. "Just you wait until you see them in action Headmistress. They have become such a cohesive team it is almost nauseating."

(Flashback V: How Carnage Got His Groove Back)

_Our top evil teenagers of the H.I.V.E academy sat in a circle as they were discussing very serious matters. Brother Blood had just informed them that they were now the 'Anti-Titans'. A group with the soul purpose of tormenting our heroes and ultimately ending their lives. Fun, fun, fun right?_

_The five gave each other hard glares as Gizmo stood at the chalkboard with a writing utensil in hand. Mammoth sat tinkering with a nearby pencil while Venom stood indifferently staring at the ceiling. Carnage and Jinx were the noisiest and their laughs echoed with great definition._

"_And that's why Venom is so grumpy all the time." Carnage chuckled._

"_Oh, too cute." Jinx winked towards Venom who angrily growled. Carnage grinned._

"_Aw come on pops you gotta admit Parker totally schooled you that one time he tricked you into heading to a 'once in a couple of months' shuttle launch. I mean come on."_

"_Oh shut up." Venom scowled._

"_Aw it's okay Venny Poo. We all make mistakes." Jinx smiled as she again used her new 'pet' name for our favorite black symbiote._

_Venom snarled. "Don't call us that! What do we look like some kind of dog?"_

"_Now that you mention it-" Carnage pondered only to be met with a fierce scowl. He chuckled nervously. "Okay never mind."_

_Gizmo sighed loudly. "Will you pit sniffers get serious? We need a team name and we need one now!"_

_Mammoth raised his hand only to be blown off. "Look you cludge bumper we're not going to name ourselves the 'Bonecrusher Brigade'."_

_Our large meta-human growled in frustration as Carnage snickered. "Oh come on baldy we already got the perfect name. 'Carnage and Co.'"_

_Venom laughed. "Oh yeah, let's name ourselves after the dumbest symbiote alive."_

"_You are so mean." Carnage teasingly frowned. "But seriously what do you want to name ourselves? The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers?"_

_Mammoth's eyes lit up. "YEA!"_

_The others scowled. Jinx shook her head. "No way."_

"_Yea," Venom agreed. "Although that pink one was so cute."_

"_Yea she was…" All three other males sighed. _

Jinx cleared her throat. "Okay enough… let's get serious."

_The five teens pondered. Suddenly Carnage exploded._

"_By golly I got it!"_

"_Oh this oughta be good." Venom crossed his arms with a snicker. Carnage smiled evilly._

"_Alright what's the key to a good group name?"_

_Venom scratched his head. "Um a name that isn't suggested by you?"_

_Carnage growled. "Cute… but no jackass!"_

_The H.I.V.E. members stood silent and Carnage's impatience grew even thinner until he just blurted it out. _

"They all have numbers at the end with matching initials!"

_The other four teens looked at one another and then turned back towards Carnage. "What?"_

"_Oh come on dad… look at this list… The Fantastic Four, the Sinister Six, the Excellent Eleven, the-"_

"_Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa." Venom interrupted. "The Excellent Eleven?" _

"_Well… no one's named themselves that yet but I swear if there was an eleven member team they would so use that."_

"_Riiight." Venom, Jinx, Gizmo, and Mammoth all replied simultaneously._

"_So anyway, since there are five of us we gotta pick a description that fits us that starts with 'F'." Carnage stated._

_Venom nodded slowly. "How about Fuc-"_

"_No." The rest replied before he could finish._

"_Just a suggestion,"_

_And the suggestions kept coming._

"_Funny!"_

"_Funky!"_

"_Ferocious!"_

"_Fabulous!"  
_

"_Fastidious!"_

_This continued smoothly until Mammoth said something that was totally out of line._

"_Furry!"_

_All thinned eyes slowly glared towards him with vigor. Suddenly a mass of inanimate objects was thrown at our tank of a meta-human for suggesting something so stupid. Mammoth reeled back from the harsh blows and frowned as his teammates shook their heads._

_Gizmo growled. "Furry Five, yea that'll strike fear into the hearts of many. I can picture it now, 'Watch out Jump City! They're furrier than teddy bears!' Oh scary!" _

Jinx suddenly lit up. "Fear… fear… Fearsome!"

_The teens looked at one another and started to slowly nod at the suggestion. Carnage snickered. "Fearsome Five… Jinx you are brilliant girl!"_

_Jinx nodded with a lighthearted smile. Carnage pointed at Venom. "She deserves a smooch."_

_Venom growled. "And you deserve to die."_

_Ladies and Gentlemen the Fearsome Five has been born._

(End Flashback)

"The Fearsome Five," Headmistress nodded. "Sounds promising,"

"I am quite excited to see what they can do. They are prepared and are ready to strike at any moment."

"Well, you have impressed me with your words Headmaster Blood." She smiled. "You always seem to do so."

Brother Blood grinned. "That is an honor."

"So I believe I should let you go now, I expect to see results."

"As do I."

"I'll be seeing you around." Adeline said as she prepared to cut the feed. Blood suddenly spazed.

"Uh wait."

Adeline turned with a curious glare. Blood began to sweat bullets.

"Um… I was wondering if you're not too busy this weekend that is... or any other day for that matter… uh… if you would mind having dinner with… uh… me?"

Adeline slowly broke a grin and then a chuckle. "Mr. Blood, are you asking me, your boss, on a date?"

Blood gulped. "Uh, I shouldn't have… right?"

"No, that was very brave of you." The Headmistress nodded slowly. "And I accept."

Blood's eyes lit up like a child. "Oh really?" he turned away from the screen and began to fist pump out of reaction. "Yes! Yes! Yes!"

Headmistress only glared on a bit frightened. Brother Blood quickly stopped himself and regained that 'Oh so proper' demeanor. He turned. "Well I'll rendezvous with you this weekend then?"

Headmistress sighed. "Yes, but I must warn you Blood if I'm not much of relationship type gal anymore."

"Oh? Why?"

"Uh the one relationship that was any good didn't end very well."

"What happened?"

She grimaced as she spoke. "I uh… sorta shot his… eye… out."

"… Out? "

"Yea… as in… completely out… gone. Not there anymore."

Blood gulped and Adeline smiled. "Well anyway I'll be seeing you this weekend… 7 o clock good for you?"

"Um… when you say 'shot' you don't mean by like a… a… you know."

"A gun?"

"Yes, one of those."

Adeline giggled. "I'll see you at Saturday at 7. Tah tah Headmaster."

"But… but… but…"

The screen went static and then blank. Brother Blood stood completely silent as he slowly touched his eye with worry. A scream as loud as gun shot soon followed.

"BROTHA!"

Blood suddenly leapt into the air totally startled and turned to see Carnage laughing his crazy laugh. He then looked behind the crimson symbiote to notice the rest of the Fearsome Five standing with their accompanying chuckles. Blood brushed himself off as he calmly composed himself again and scowled.

"Mr. Carnage there's a door. Knock."

"Knock? Bah, that's no fun brotha. Gotta keep it cool ya know what I'm sayin'?" Carnage extended a hand for a high five but received no such thing.

Blood growled. "Don't call me that."

Carnage just sighed as he dropped his high five position. Venom laughed. "So, somebody has a date this weekend eh?"

"What?" Blood's eyes widened. "How long were you here?"

Carnage chuckled. "Long enough to watch Headmistress blow you kisses."

"We are all very happy for you Headmaster." Jinx grinned. Gizmo and Mammoth began to beat box an instrumental melody only found in those naughty videos. Blood's eyes quickly turned to fire. "GET IN LINE NOW!"

After figuratively shrinking to pint sizes the Fearsome Five all lined up in army formation. Blood began to stroll back and fourth with his signature hands behind the back strut. The teenagers chuckled lightly as he stared at them.

"You five are the top students of the class by far. My pride, my accomplishments, and my goals all lay within each and every one of you." Blood turned his back to continue his speech, although whether it was being listened to was a different story.

Carnage turned to Mammoth. "Hmm, I wonder what they're serving for lunch today."

"Meat loaf." Mammoth replied, remembering the serving schedule by heart. Venom stuck his serpentine tongue out. "Meatloaf? Ugh, that shit tastes horrible."

"This coming from a guy that eats brains… that's rich." Gizmo commented. Venom shrugged and sent a tendril that whacked Gizmo atop the head. Our green adorning mini me growled at a laughing Venom and replied with his own whack via one of his spider legs.

"Why you-"

"Is there a problem Mr. Venom?" Blood scowled. Venom dropped his aggression. "No, no there isn't."

Blood nodded and continued his speech about H.I.V.E tradition. Venom growled as Gizmo snickered at him.

"Aw poor Venny poo." Jinx smirked. "Want me to kiss it and make it all better?"

Venom only sighed in defeat as he turned back towards Carnage who was pointing in a mocking laugh. Blood suddenly turned. "So anyone have any questions?"

Pseudo-confident eye contacts were exchanged and everyone just nodded knowing that they hadn't been paying attention. Blood smiled. "Okay then, so who is going to be the team leader?"

"Team leader?" All five replied. They all paused as they looked at one another clueless. Carnage stepped up with a confident grin.

"I think I'm best suited as the leader. So I'll take the job."

Venom scoffed. "Oh we don't think so. We're way better suited for this job."

Carnage growled. "No, you're better suited to go pick up monkey crap."

"Oh can it offspring, bottom line is we have more experience in working within a team than you."

"Oh please you worked with the Sinister Six for a few days big wow."

"Hey! They were a good few days."

"You freaking ate one of your teammates!"

The four non symbiotes made disgusted faces as Venom grinned. "Oh yeah, that was fun heh heh heh."

"Crud, you two are way too psycho to lead the team anyway." Gizmo scowled. "So I'll be the leader."

"Yea, just what we need a pint sized foul mouthed baby leading us." Venom shot back.

"Oh pipe it you ugly freakin' crud eater."

Carnage, Venom, and Gizmo growled at one another ready to rip each others' heads off.

"Hey can I make a suggestion?" Jinx intervened and received reluctant nods. "I think we should pick the most level headed person on the team. The most quick thinking, rational, and stand up person we got."

"Agreed." The three replied. Gizmo, Venom, and Carnage grinned each of them thinking she was speaking of themselves. Jinx smiled. "And that's why I elect Mammoth."

"WHAT?" Venom, Blood, Mammoth, and Gizmo replied.

"Yes, Mammoth should be our leader." Jinx nodded. Carnage scratched his chin. "You know, that might be crazy enough to work… I vote for Mammoth too!"

Mammoth was speechless just like the other 'somewhat' sane H.I.V.E. members were. Blood quickly shook his head. "Uh, I believe I should decide who is leader and I say Venom and Carnage are co-leaders since they have impressed me so."

The five only nodded indifferently as they got back in line. Blood grinned. "Congratulations you all have now graduated from the H.I.V.E. and are now full time agents."

"Sweet!" Carnage pranced. Blood smirked. "Soon you five will be deployed and the Teen Titans will be destroyed for good!"

The Five nodded approvingly as Blood preached on. "Be prepared my students but right now I must take leave and find some bullet proof glasses."

Blood walked out and The Fearsome Five looked at one another with a slight chuckle. Venom and Carnage grinned.

"We passed." Carnage praised.

"Yep." Venom replied.

"We graduated."

"Yep."

"We're in."

"Ye-"

"Oh you haven't gotten 'in' just yet boys." Jinx winked breaking their pattern filled conversation. Venom and Carnage turned and their white eyes widened at the sight in front of them. Mammoth had in his hands two unicycles while Gizmo had two cute looking pink tu tus just crying to be adorned. The symbiotes turned their attention back to Jinx who snickered.

"It's initiation time."

Venom and Carnage plainly looked at one another and let out the biggest sweat drops ever seen.

( - Titans Tower - )

Today was just another day at the big 'T'. Crime was provided another daily serving of a Teen Titan butt kicking at its best and it was now resting and chow time for our favorite heroes. 'Ze' Chef de jour was, of course, our favorite culinary cybernetic teenager – Cyborg! If Starfire was a virtuoso at the mall, then this kid was a virtuoso in the kitchen. Wolfgang who?

Cyborg stirred slowly and tasted his creation. "Man! Now that's a spicy meatball!" he kissed his finger tips paying homage to the stereotypical Italian way.

Ya can't lose with spaghetti and meatballs kids. Ya just can't. Or atleast that's what this obviously high spirited half-droid thought.

"Cause this is Thriller! Ow! Thriller night! Da dee da da daa do da dee da do a dee do do-" Cyborg shamelessly sang (All be it horridly) his ballets of Michael Jackson, Seal, and Boys 2 Men medleys as he did his chef thing. Starfire and Robin gave him awkward stares as they were seated over by the television set watching a rousing basketball game between the Gotham City Knights and the Metropolis Steel. Starfire's grimacing look towards Cyborg turned to a puzzled look towards Robin.

"So the point of the basketball tourney is to place that orange sphere of leather into the cylinder with the pretty white netting?"

"Exactly," Robin nodded as he proceeded to watch superstar player Lebron James dunk over a poor hapless defender. Starfire watched as the defender fell to the ground in a pathetic display of embarrassment.

"Friend he does not look like he is having fun playing 'the basketball'."

"Yea, he sure doesn't." Robin commented with an amazed stare.

"Dude!" Beast Boy suddenly yelled from the other side of the room. "Lemme help Cy."

Cyborg shook his head as he was preparing to cut up some lemons. "Uh no thanks B I got it."

"Oh come on! I've been watching some chef shows on T.V. it's a cinch." Beast Boy pushed Cyborg aside and quickly grabbed a knife, then a lemon. Cyborg's human eye enlarged. "Wait BB don't!"

It was too late.

Our green Titan cut into the lemon forcibly or better yet too forcibly, sending the juice soaring across the air, finding its way into an 'eye' - a now angry and in pain eye.

"Gah! The sting! Momma no!" Cyborg whined as he clutched his lemon'd eye. Beast Boy laughed nervously as he hid the lemon and the knife behind his back. The half-droid glared with his LED eye shining red. "Give me… the lemon."

BB quickly complied all the while scratching his head in a weak laugh. "My bad."

Cyborg ripped the yellow fruit away from our emerald Titan and scowled. Starfire and Robin broke into laughter as Beast Boy slowly backed away.

"Oh Lucy I'm home!"

All eyes turned to the new arrival.

"Spider-Dude!" Beast Boy greeted with a wave.

Yes, it was our crime fighting arachnoid Spidey who had just returned from alone time in the city. He looked totally upbeat as he strolled in with a bag in his hand. Starfire quickly leapt up in continuous claps. "What a joyous occasion! Our friend has returned!"

"Sup Spidey." Cyborg muttered as he was washing his eye out by the sink. Spider-Man snickered. "What the heck happened to you?"

"Beast Boy happened to me." Cyborg growled. Spidey looked over towards Beast Boy who was still chuckling lightly.

"So," BB noticed the bags in Spidey's hands. "What did you bring back?"

"Oh," Spidey looked down. "Presents for you guys. Ya know, for being nice enough to take me in."

Starfire jumped up and down. "Oh presents! This is most exciting!"

"Presents?" Robin quickly got up in a curious glare. "Uh you shouldn't have."

"Sure I should, it's the least I can do." Spider-Man replied.

"Please friend show us what gifts you have brought!" Starfire grabbed onto his shoulders in a bounce.

"Okay okay okay," Spidey gave in as he reached into the bag and pulled out a couple of photographs. The Titans quickly gathered around in anticipation as he handed each of them a specific one. Yes people, all that taking pictures of himself was going to pay off in more than that 'green' type way.

"Cooooool." Beast Boy muttered as he stared at the photograph. It was one of him in gorilla form preparing to toss a baddie through a window. "I look totally awesome!" he cheered flexing his muscles.

"Yea man… I look like a complete stud." Cyborg added confidently, still rubbing his eye. He admired his photograph which consisted of him blasting a baddie to hell with his sonic cannon.

Robin snickered at the still shot of him batting a crook away with a kick, with saliva spewing out and the works. "Real nice."

Starfire seemed the most excited as always as she glared at hers with glistening eyes. "This is glorious! It is very strange looking at a picture of myself kicking the bad guy butt."

"I'm sure it is." Spider-Man nodded. Cyborg pointed. "So I am guessing you do this photography stuff often?"

"Just enough," Spidey replied.

Robin chuckled. "Taking snapshots while we're in battle, that takes some skill. It's pretty fast paced isn't it?"

"Yes, but no skill needed. Just luck… and spider reflexes but who doesn't have that?"

After slight chuckles our arachnoid looked around. "Uh where's Raven?"

"I think she's in her room meditating." Beast Boy muttered as the rest of the Titans continued to look at their pictures with smiles. "Nice, I'll go give this to her and head to bed, I'm beat tired." Spider-Man moped.

"Crime fighting wearing you down?" Cyborg asked. Spidey shook his head while walking off. "Oh heck no, it was waiting in the lines at the store… ludicrous I tell ya!"

The Titans shook their heads in bemused smiles as Spidey prepared himself to greet the dark sorceress herself.

--

The photo in Spider-Man's grasp brought such a mix of emotions. On one hand he felt a bit homesick as it has been a week since he arrived in this more or less unusual dimension. Yet on the other hand he was very excited about this new temporary (or hopefully temporary) beginning. Mixed blessings and Spider-Man always seemed to find each other and right now thankfully the excitement was a bit more prominent within his inner-feelings.

The excitement at the moment was jump started obviously by the anticipation to see what Raven's reaction would be of course - even if negative. Her negative reactions, although Spidey was shameful to admit it, were a riot to see. Besides he knew it was just a front, the whole Titan team knew it. Pushing this girl's buttons was just too fun. As long as you didn't go too far that is.

Spider-Man glared at the picture of Raven he had snapped and nodded. It was pretty awesome. It was of her in total bad guy beating mode, with eyes shining bright white and cape fluttering from the intense power radiating from her. Spidey was hoping maybe this gift would break the ice a bit because as much as the other four had taken him in with open arms this sorceress clearly wasn't. They never did 'the hanging out' as Starfire would put it, in fact they rarely exchanged words. The last thing Spidey wanted was to feel like he was a burden to anyone. He was going to fix this.

With a loud breath, the moment of truth had arrived. Spider-Man was ready to give the room a knock but noticed that the door was wide open. He slowly peered into the dark room and cleared his throat.

"Uh Raven?" Spidey whimpered. "Hello?"

There was no answer.

Common sense told Spider-Man to hightail it out of here but his curiosity was just killing him to explore. Spidey has had the pleasure to see most of the Titans' rooms from Cyborg's 'Oh my god is this for real?' room to Beast Boy's 'Oh my God get a damn maid' room. But to no surprise Raven's room hasn't had the privilege of having Spider-Man in its confines.

The words 'No one goes in my room' echoed into Spider-Man's thoughts repeatedly but this curious kid couldn't help it. He slowly crept into the forbidden quarters. _Okay just going to put the picture in the room and get out. _He thought._ No harm no foul._

He tip-toed his way in and quickly took notice of the countless stacks of thick books that were neatly placed around the area. The gothic styled furniture in the form of gargoyles and candles came next and then the overall darkness took over. Spider-Man sighed at the room straight out of a horror novel. "Sheesh, I've heard of dark but this is ridiculous."

Spidey's unease built as he knew the longer he stayed the chance of trouble arose, so he quickly looked around for a place to place his gift. His eyes found the bed and he made a quick dash to place the photograph upon the sheets. He turned to leave but noticed something that intrigued him.

It was his reflection bouncing off a mirror - one pretty cool looking mirror at that.

It lay on the bed and he grinned as his crimson mask glared back at him. Spidey snickered as he touched his face. "Lookin' good Spidey" he joked as he struck a heroic pose. He picked up the mirror and began admiring the details of his mask.

"Man those S.T.A.R. people really got every detail."

Indeed, the people at S.T.A.R. Labs have made replacement replica suits for Spider-Man that rendered his old ones obsolete. This new brand of Spider tights had all the freedom of movement of his last ones and then some. There were two major differences. First the material was produced in a similar way to Robin's cape, which as we all know is nearly indestructible. Second his spider insignia, which now looked a lot more edgy, had a built in alarm which would shine brightly whenever there was trouble just like every Titan had.

Of course this kid was loving it all. One of the many perks he had living in this dimension. Spider-Man continued to admire the details but suddenly his spider-sense went off. He quickly back flipped and turned in a defensive maneuver.

He found nothing.

"What the-"

He then heard playful giggles… ditzy giggles even. But the fact that these laughs sounded like they came from nowhere wasn't what was troubling him most. It was the fact that the laughs sounded like they were coming from…

"Raven?"

Suddenly the mirror Spider-Man was holding began to glow bright pink. He quickly attempted to toss it away but it was too late. Soon he found himself wrapped from his neck to his legs in pink cutesy ribbons that were manifesting from the mirror itself. Spidey gulped as the giggles became louder.

"This is so not good."

And with that he was magically pulled into the magical mirror, unprepared for the craziness that was waiting for him.

The ditzy giggling of Raven slowly faded away with the pink glow.


	7. Love's in the Air! All Spiders Beware!

A surplus of food…

Two psychotic symbiotes…

Plenty of witnesses…

Bad combination?

Oh yeah…

Watching symbiotes consume their daily nutrients of course isn't for the faint of heart. It's a savage process that even the strongest of stomachs would have trouble taking. No one should have the burden of witnessing such primal and crazed imagery. But then again, believe it or not, there is actually something worse.

Yep.

And that of course is watching symbiotes eat alongside Mammoth and Fang…

"Ugh." Gizmo closed his eyes in disgust, watching his teammates gobble up their lunches like there was no tomorrow.

"Yummy yummy in my freakin' tummy!" Carnage sang happily as he continued to gorge himself silly.

Table manners were completely irrelevant as Venom, Carnage, Fang, and Mammoth were putting on a clinic to their respective plates of cafeteria food.

The Fearsome Five were sitting at their usual table, being accompanied by Fang and Kitten, of course being the new 'top dogs' of the H.I.V.E. Academy scene. And while Gizmo and Kitten looked on disgusted at all four of our crazed gluttonous consumers, Jinx's attention was a bit more specific.

"Black and white is always right." She sighed dreamily, staring at Venom who was now licking his spoon with that infamous tongue of his.

"Ugh, can I have some food with this gruel?" Kitten, the spoiled queen of the world, complained.

"I'll take it!"

Carnage sent a tendril soaring towards the food with the quickness of a rattlesnake and began to gorge away. Kitten stared on with shaky eyes, literally being terrified. Yes, terrified. And this was coming from a girl that makes out with a guy with six eyes, not to mention having a monster moth for a father.

"Okay," Gizmo tossed his untouched food aside. "My appetite's gone,"

"That's ours!" Venom yelled only to be countered by Carnage.

"No way," Carnage scowled. "Mine!"

"You already had yours you freakin' pig."

"Ay, I'm a growing skinny kid, I need to bulk up. While you, on the other hand, look like you're on steroids."

"Yea Venom," Jinx added. "Besides, you'd want to save room for dessert anyway."

"We do?" Venom grew curious. "What's for dessert?"

"… My lips," Jinx grinned with heart eyes.

With a loud clank of Venom's spoon falling from his limp grasp there was an awkward pause. The whole table went silent, all consumption halting as if time itself had frozen. Venom peaked around the table to meet widened eyes. He sighed as he heard muffled chuckles from the whole table. The symbiote pushed his tray aside and hissed towards his scorners.

"We're not hungry anymore either." The obsidian creature leapt off his seat and walked.

"Alright!" Carnage smiled as his tendril was once again made busy, engulfing that food with ease. He turned towards his counterpart frantically. "Hey pops where ya off to?"

"… Contemplating whether or not to hang ourselves,"

"Okay, uh… have fun!"

"Yea yea," Venom muttered as he disappeared into the dormitory area.

"Ahhh," Mammoth sighed with a large goofy smile. "That was really really good."

Apparently the tank finally had enough after consuming half of the schools food supply.

"Uh crud for brains?" Gizmo ogled at his friends' extremely relaxed nature. "You know you still need to finish that research paper before lunch is over right?"

"Research… paper?" Mammoth gasped. "Oh God," his eyes widened only now remembering that fact. He quickly got up from his seat and grabbed Gizmo by his backpack.

"Hey!"

"Sorry dude, but you're helping me."

"What? No! You pit sniffin' monkey, let me down!"

Mammoth ignored his pleas as he ran off towards his locker, dragging a screaming Gizmo with him. Fang and Kitten looked at one another with eye rolls as they began to cuddle on the side, doing that boyfriend girlfriend thing. Carnage of course was still enjoying his self gorging while Jinx sat depressingly with her chin resting in her hands.

"Carnage," her voice whispered.

Carnage only slurped up spaghetti in reply.

"I don't think Venom's warming up to me as much as I'd like."

Carnage's white eyes suddenly rolled over to Jinx teasingly, reluctantly stopping his chow time in a playful chuckle.

"Aw poor you." he sighed. "Don't worry J. Pops doesn't warm up to anyone right away."

"… Really?"

"Yea, I mean he's been trying to kill me for what? Uh, almost a year?" Carnage pondered to himself, only to get a curious yet fearful glare from Jinx. "Well I don't remember, but anyway look at us now! We're like blood brothas."

"Ugh," Jinx pouted. "Well I'm tired of waiting."

Carnage shrugged indifferently and went back to foodsville.

"Wait!"

"Gah!" The surprise caused Carnage to spray out food bits as Jinx startled him completely, leaping upwards like a rocket. A few particles landed upon Kitten's beautiful hair sending her off screaming and running. Fang glared at Carange who only laughed.

"Sorry dude."

"You're sick." Fang growled as he took off after his love.

"Thanks!" Carnage yelled as he turned back towards Jinx, whose gray lips slowly broke a mischievous grin. 

"Maybe I haven't been assertive enough."

"Hmmm," Carnage scratched his chin. "Ya know what? I agree." he spoke with his mouth full of tater tots. "You should stick on him like white on rice girl!"

"You think so?"

"Oh yeah, you're blazin' hot!" Carnage gave her the thumbs up. "Go flirt and strut that stuff. Stay glued on that crazy bastard until he can't stop thinking about you."

"Yeah," Jinx shined. "I'll go do that." she grinned as she walked off to where Venom had left, fixing that obscure hair while getting ready to play that flirty game.

Carnage began to chortle at the thought of the seed he just planted.

"Good luck pops." he chomped down a sandwich. "You're so gonna need it. Heh heh heh… Oh man," His lips smacked with pleasure. "Good ol' PB and J, just like that old lady use to make 'em at Ravencroft," He sighed dismally in thought. "Damn, I knew I shouldn't have killed her..."

He paused as his face became distorted from thought.

"… Was that a decapitation? Or one of those good ol' throat stabs?" he spoke to himself. "Oh! It was both! Teehee! That was a good one! Oh yea…"

With that, the eating then continued.

Chomp.

Chomp.

Chomp.

( - The Astral World of 'Nevermore' - )

Poor poor Spidey, God bless his soul,

For there he frantically falls from a blackened warp hole,

Soaring out, in the most violent of tumbles,

From him comes a yell, that literally causes rumbles.

"YAAAAAAAAAAH!" echoed across the astral plane… that being the beautiful sound of a teenage boy plunging to his death of course. This crazed yell was coming from our favorite arachnoid, whose number once again seemed to be up. And being wrapped up in cutesy ribbons that would be perfect for a five year old girl's birthday party, Spidey kept falling, falling, and falling – only to fall some more.

"This is so gonna hurt," He muttered as he glared at the pink ground. He suddenly paused. "Wait a sec-"

He blinked his eyes.

"Pink?"

The collision was near and Spidey shrugged off his thoughts bracing for some serious impact. Expecting to be flattened to nothing but a pavement pancake, he was in for a pleasant surprise as he literally found himself bouncing up and down as if he were on a trampoline - the terrain being as soft as marshmallows. 

After being tossed to the air and landing a couple of times Spidey began to enjoy himself, bouncing up and down with glee.

"Hey this isn't so-"

**CRASH!**

Apparently the softness was only temporary.

"… Bad …" Spidey groaned as he pressed his hands to the ground, pulling his noggin out of the dirt road. He twitched a bit and took notice that the ribbons around him were gone. The boy quickly leapt to his feet to take a glance around. What he saw swiftly brought him to a breathless state and saying the area looked pleasant was quite an understatement.

This place was too pleasant.

Pleasant to the point of freakiness,

"Uh, why do I feel like I'm in one of those Teletubby episodes?" Spider-Man gasped as he looked at the area around him that seemed to be created by a toddler with a broken paint brush. The pink mountains, the purple trees, and the perky yellow sky were a bit hard to adjust to and Spider-Man just scratched his head, completely clueless.

"Okay, Spidey you've been in weirder places before. Mysterio's kooky little magic house, that Symbiote planet, the-" Spidey paused as he noticed a floating strawberry that soared over his head. After a long hard stare at the fruit, he sighed.

"… Never mind,"

Suddenly Spider-Man heard a playful giggle that caused him to turn with a panicky twitch.

"Raven?" The voice seemed to be carrying from all directions.

"Uh Raven?" He asked shakily again. "… If that's you this isn't funny. You giggling like that is just plain creepy."

"_Hehehehe, you're so funny."_

Spider-Man froze as he heard those words.

"I'm funny?" He scowled. "Alright no more games! Who are you? And where the heck am I?"

"_Oh games! Yay! I love games! Hey, I know what would be fun! Let's tell each other jokes!"_

"Um, how about let's not and just say we did?"

"_No silly! I'll start. Okay, Knock Knock!"_

"Uh," Spidey hesitated but slowly decided to play along, hoping this would entice his capturer to show herself. "Who's there?"

"_Boo."_

"Boo who?"

"Aw, don't be sad!" Spidey turned to the now loud as can be voice. "Be happy like me!"

"Wait… GAH!" Suddenly he felt a weight bare down on him like a bunch of bricks as a pink hooded figure leapt into his arms, forcing him to carry her like a couple that had just been wed.

Spider-Man stared at the girl in his grasp as she was grabbing him around the neck in a playful tug. He sweat dropped as he stared at those purple eyes that should have been scowling. His jaw dropped at that hooded cloak that was a hot pink and not a cold blue.

Raven in… pink?

"Okay, who are you and why the hell do you look exactly like Raven?"

"I am Raven you Silly Sally." The girl giggled.

"… Did you just call me a Silly Sally?"

The girl nodded gleefully.

"… You can't be Raven." Spider-Man reasoned.

"Um alright," the girl smiled mischievously. "Can I be like a princess then? Like Snow White? Or Cinderella?"

"Uh," Spidey sighed as he placed the hooded girl down and stared at her very harshly. "… So you really are Raven?"

"Well duh! Can't you tell?" She laughed like a complete ditz, flapping her cape and twirling around like the innocent girl she was.

"But, why are you dressed in pink? Where am I? Why are you acting perkier than Starfire? And why the heck does this place smell like cookies?"

"Whoa," The pink hooded Raven grew dizzy by the questions. She quickly composed herself. "Okay uh, because I love pink. You're in Raven's mind, and-"

"Wait," Spider-Man halted. "Did you just say 'Raven's mind'?" he took a look at his happy surroundings and scoffed. "Riiight."

Raven sat as she bit her fingernails in deep thought.

"Okay… I love pink… you're in Ravens mind…" She clapped in victory. "Yeah! I did say that."

"So I am in her mind… I guess… but you mind telling me how?"

"Ugh," Happy interrupted with a leap. "This is boring, let's go have some fun. I didn't bring you here for all these questions!"

"Wait, _you _brought me here?"

"Yup!"

"… Why?"

"To thank you, you funny boy!" Happy smiled brightly as she started to jump up and down, pushing on Spidey's shoulder for leverage.

"Thank me?" Spidey questioned. "… For what exactly?"

"Hmph," Happy pouted. "You ask too many questions. Let's just start having fun."

Suddenly Happy reached for Spider-Man's mask.

"Whoa wait a sec," Spidey gently grabbed her hands. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Well, I wanna see the face of the boy that makes me laugh so much."

"Okay first off, from the looks of it, I think you'd laugh at anything. Second I'm not taking off my mask."

"Why?"

"Because my identity is a secret."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want people close to me getting hurt."

"Why?"

"Huh? 'Why?" Why not?"

"I dunno."

"…"

"Come on," Happy smiled. "It'll be fun." she grabbed onto the mask again and Spidey hurriedly grabbed onto it as well, thus starting a tug of war that Happy was thoroughly enjoying.

"I have to see your face. I bet you're totally cute!"

"No! Raven please! It's like Robin. I can't be seen without my mask!"

"Why? Are you some sort of freaky spider faced thingy and you're ashamed?"

Spidey paused and slowly nodded.

"Yea, that's it, and I don't want you to see me."

"Oh," Happy suddenly stopped tugging as she stared at him. That 'front' was only passing. "Hmm, you must look totally cool! I wanna see!"

"What? No!"

Happy giggled loudly as the tugging continued. She was now planted on Spidey's shoulders pulling with all her might while our crimson hero held on to his mask for dear life. This Raven was just relentless with her efforts and Spidey needed to think and think fast.

"Whoa look!" he pointed. "Candy!"

"Candy?" Happy turned. "Where?"

Spidey used the distraction and tossed Happy off of him. She fell on her rear end laughing loudly as she was as always having fun, even if in pain. With a furious sprint that even surprised himself, Spider-Man took off like a race car, soaring down the paved roadway at incredible speeds.

"Hey! You tricked me!" Happy pouted as she levitated herself to a stand. "Come here you slippery smarty pants!"

"Raven, are you completely insane?" Spidey yelled back as he glared at Happy running at him with her hands spread out, making airplane noises. "… Ugh, stupid question."__

Spidey continued to sprint until he came across what looked to be a gateway. The gothic structure of the portal made him hesitate but as he turned and saw that pink fury of joy come barreling at him he sighed.

"Talley ho," Spider-Man muttered as he held his breath in a prayerful dive into the portal.

( - A Skip, a Hop, and an Astral Warp Later - )

From the fluffiest of the fluffy to the creepiest of the creepy,

That's what Spidey was thinking as he looked around his ominous 'space' type surroundings. There were sharp gray rocks scattered all over its terrain, dead trees that just screamed trouble, and birds… no ravens with four eyes that looked like they came straight out of the works of Edgar Alan Poe.

"Bacaw!" The birds screeched aggressively as they eyed the boy in front of them.

Now this was how Spider-Man pictured Raven's mind would look like. 

Spidey glanced at a small raven that soared off into the space like sky, only to disappear like a ghost. He slowly rolled his eyes back to the pathway ahead and began to walk, plainly a bit freaked out.

"Funny how this isn't scaring me as much as that Barneyland."

"Hey Spidey! I see you!"

"Oh no," Spider-Man turned and noticed Happy right on his tail. "Raven, this is so not funny!"

"Sure it is!"

Spidey sighed as getting through to this 'Raven' obviously wasn't working. He picked up the pace of his sprint, thinking about how exactly he was going to get out of this mess.

"Okay, gotta think… think… think…" after a few seconds he grumbled. "Oh who am I kidding? I have no freakin' clue how-" Spider-Man was suddenly muffled as he turned only to be stopped abruptly by something soft... very soft. He froze completely unsure of what exactly to do. Whatever it was that stopped him, it was warm and his face was planted into deeply, engulfing his entire vision.

All he saw was black… it felt so, tender.

"Having fun?"

"What the-" The arachnoid froze completely as he slowly looked up to see two purple eyes glaring at him. "GAH!" Spidey leapt back pulling his face away from a certain girl's ample chest. The girl giggled as she watched him shamefully backpedal, Spider-Man's mask eyes widening in horror.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to-"

"Oh, think nothing of it." The green hooded girl snickered. "I didn't mind a bit."

"Huh?" Spidey then took a harder look and noticed that this girl too looked familiar. "… Raven?"

"That's my name, don't wear it out."

"But… but… but…" Spidey then sighed. "Uh… was I just… uh… in your… um…"

"Yes you were Spider-Bro." A new voice called out saving the babbling buffoon. Spider-Man gulped realizing that the voice was once again familiar. With a turn he was met with another hooded girl, this one in orange. 

"Good thing Raven's so well built." The orange hooded Raven stuck her chest out proudly. "Gotta love those airbags eh Spidey?"

The two girls giggled as they gave each other a high five. Spider-Man was awestruck.

"Okay, now there's two Ravens and you both had a costume change… nothing weird about that." Spidey muttered all the while feeling his face, still embarrassed of what had just happened.

"Boy, you are cute." The green one smiled.

"Yea, we're going to love having you around as a pet." The orange one belched.

"Hold it you two! I found him first! He's mine!"

Spidey spun to see Happy leaping towards him, wrapping her arms around his neck in a choke. The momentum caused them both to fall over and Happy hugged him tightly as she landed on top, keeping him away from her sisters.

"Ow," Spider-Man groaned as his mask eyes were literally swirling. Happy smiled brightly, tightening her grip.

"He's mine! All mine! Mine-mine-mine-mine-mine!"

"Oh pipe down sunshine," Happy was forcibly yanked off by her Brave counterpart. "There's enough to go around."

Happy pouted as Spider-Man grabbed his head feeling as if he had been spun around in a chair for an eternity. The three Ravens glared down upon him with brightened eyes.

"Okay," Spidey moped as he slowly got up. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," Gross grinned lazily. "But you sure got it going on - cool costume." she playfully pulled at it.

"Hey!" Spider-Man commented as he pushed her hand away. Brave chuckled.

"Yea, nice butt too."

Slap!

"HEY!" Spider-Man yelped as he quickly backed away clutching his rear end in a fearful jump. The three Ravens giggled as he scowled.

"Okay who the heck are you three and where's the real Raven?"

"We're all Raven dude." Brave answered as the three stalked him into a corner.

"Wait, I'm in Raven's mind," Spider-Man looked at each of them. "… So you three must be different facets of her personality?"

"Ding ding ding ding ding! You are correct!" Gross teased. "Sister can you tell him what he's won?"

"A kiss," Brave grinned devilishly, "From all three of us."

Spider-Man raised a brow.

"Yay a kiss!" Happy pranced.

"So you're all part of her subconscious personality… hmm, now let me guess," He pointed towards Brave. "You're her crazy side." He then pointed to Gross. "You're her crazier side." And then finally he pointed to Happy. "And you're her craziest side."

They all giggled.

"Yep, we're all crazy." Brave grinned. "Crazy about you,"

"Uh huh," Gross growled. "Now let's stop talking and see what's behind that mask!"

"Cripes," Spider-Man cracked as he backed away slowly.

"Alright girls," Brave snickered. "Let's bag ourselves a spider…"

"… Mommy…"

( - The H.I.V.E. - )

The sounds of cartoon jibber jabber and Carnage's chuckles were echoing hand and hand, rectifying down the hallways of the H.I.V.E academy. Cassidy was beside himself in laughter as he stared at his newly purchased mini T.V. set that was snug in his hands, its remote dangling in one of his many flailing tendrils.

"Heh heh heh that Sponge Bob." Carnage laughed. "Cracks me up every ti-"

"Yo offspring!"

"Venom! Gah!" Carnage quickly switched channels into something he would be more expected to watch.

"YEA ORTIZ! KILL THAT SON OF A BITCH!"

Venom ran over to Carnage, breathing heavily as if he had been participating in an all day marathon.

"Dude V you okay? I haven't seen you run this hard since Juggernaut kicked your ass."

"Ay! First off that was a lucky punch." Venom growled. "Secondly uh, wait a sec, is that a T.V.?"

"Yea man, awesome huh?" Carnage held it proudly. "Evil R Us gift certificate put to good use. Ow!"

Venom grew puzzled.

"How is this crap 'evil'?"

"Oh, it's sponsored by Martha Stewart."

". . . ," Venom sighed as he spoke with that sarcasm. "Please get that vehicle of Satan away from us."

"Well, it is a small detonator too ya know."

"What?" Venom pushed the T.V. away. "Now seriously, get that shit away."

"Don't worry," Carnage reassured. "Ya have to press a complex password that only I know into the remote. Chill out."

"Chill out?" Venom's eyes suddenly doubled in size. "Oh yeah Carnage ol' buddy ol' pal, mind doing an old friend a favor?"

"Ol' buddy ol' pal?" Carnage only stared and huffed as Venom put a hand on his shoulder. "Okay, how much money do you want?"

"No no no," Venom shook. "It's Jinx, you gotta get us away from her! That girl can't get a damn clue!"

"Aw, Venom's little crush a little too much to handle?" Carnage made kissy noises.

"Seriously, she's been stuck on us like-"

"White on rice?"

"Yea,"

"Heh I don't see the big deal here. Why don't you just have your fun? She's cute. Get some damn action you lame brain."

"We can't."

"Why?"

"Because, we're taken,"

"Oh God not this Anne crap again," Carnage moped. "Seriously you gotta let it go."

"But-"

"Even if she is your girlfriend, which she's not, what's wrong with a little play on the side? We're in a different dimension remember?" Carnage began knocking on Venom's head. "Hello McFly? Anybody home?"

Venom growled as he shoved his hand away.

"Look, we're loyal to our love okay? That's just the way we are."

"So let me get this straight. You can rip someone's heart out and eat it but you can't cheat on your _supposed_ girlfriend?"

"Exactly,"

"And they call me the psychotic one." Carnage groaned. "Sheesh, nothing worse than a symbiote with morals."

"Whatever," Venom growled. "Will you help us?"

"Fine," Carnage looked around and noticed a nearby closet. The symbiote slammed a button and the metal door slid open. "Hide in here and I'll cover for ya."

"Thanks man, we owe ya one."

"No prob, what's family for eh?"

Venom hopped into the small room and as on cue down came Jinx strutting down the hallway prancing along with dreamy eyes. Carnage looked at her in a curious manner, noticing the skips in her step.

"Now that's one love sick puppy." Carnage stared.

"Hey C," Jinx peered around. "Have you seen my cutie Venom around?"

"Hmm, you know, now that ya mention it." Carnage grabbed Jinx by her hand, opening the closet.

"Huh?" Venom gasped loudly as Jinx was tossed in. Carnage chuckled slamming the door shut. He quickly adhered the opening with his pseudopodia so that escape would be futile.

"Gah! Jinx… please… okay… you're a nice girl and all…"

"Uh huh,"

"And we really think you're totally cool…"

"Uh huh,"

"But we have a girlfriend… you understand don't you?"

"Uh huh,"

"Ugh … you're not listening to a damn thing we're saying are you?"

"Uh uh,"

"Oh boy…"

And that was when the thrashing and screaming of Venom began. Carnage listened as he laughed mockingly.

"You'll thank me later dad." he chortled walking off only to stop angrily. "Hmm, why don't I ever get the girl? I need some lovin' too ya know!"

Suddenly Bumble Bee chose an opportune time to turn the corner and Carnage hissed.

"Hey you! Wanna 'bee' my girlfriend?"

"What?" Bumble Bee gasped. "Hell no! Are you crazy?"

"Girl… you have no idea…"

Carnage laughed maniacally, tossing the T.V. and remote down as he ran after Bumblebee, who was in turn running for her life. The remote slammed to the floor violently as well with the monitor.

**Discharge sequence activated… Detonation in t-minus 10 seconds…**

The whistling of a certain white haired evil man could be heard as Brother Blood strolled down the hallway.

"Oh, what is this?" he muttered, walking by Carnage's mini T.V. "Bah, our students desperately need some lessons in the horrors of littering."

Headmaster Blood picked up the monitor and walked off to discard it.

**Self detonation in 5… 4… 3… **

"Self what?"

**2…1…**

"Oh no…"

**KABOOM!**

( - Raven's Mind - )

Spider-Man was definitely in a pickle. Everywhere he ran in this crazy maze it was a dead end.

Left turn?

Wall.

Right turn?

Wall.

Both ways turn?

Wall.

_Go into the dark maze Spidey, you can lose them in there._ Spider-Man mocked himself._ Oh yeah but I forgot to mention you could get lost too… STUPID SPIDEY! STUPID! _

Spider-Man angrily slapped himself again and again for choosing to go into this maze instead of taking his chances outside. When in desperation the mind doesn't usually respond to the best of its abilities and Spider-Man was learning this the hard way.

"Alright, right or left? Right or left?" Spidey hit the intersection and looked left only to see Gross chuckling while playfully sending smooches his way. "RIGHT!"

Spider-Man took off in the direction and ran like the wind. With a few more zig zags through the maze of doom he finally slowed down a bit, growing a bit tired from this chase. His pants were becoming heavier and he was forced to come to a stroll.

"You can't slow down just yet Spider-Cutie."

Spidey turned to see Brave staring at him, but it wasn't just any stare mind you. It was an upside down stare! But of course this arachnoid was used to viewing people inverted.

"Uh, how are you standing upside down?" Spidey questioned.

"Because I'm not the one that's upside down,"

"Oh,"

Suddenly the world turned and the two positions became flip flopped. Spidey sighed as he stood cross armed while Brave admired him.

"Wow, you didn't fall." Brave winked. "Your powers are kick ass."

"Thanks," Spider-Man grinned as he back flipped and fired a web line that blinded Brave.

"Hey!"

"Sorry!" Spidey apologized genuinely as he fell to the ground and took off running again. The turns came furiously, as he began to finally get a general clue of his whereabouts, seeing these familiar turns for the hundredth time.

"Wait is that? Yea… score!" he celebrated as he saw the faint light and made a mad dash towards the opening. Suddenly three black manifestations shot up from the ground and Spidey skidded with flailing arms to a reluctant stop.

"And where do you think you're going?" All three asked in unison.

"Aw man." Spidey moped as he backed away from his stalkers.

"Sorry Spider-boy, but we need to see what you look like." Brave said.

"Look girls, I really don't think this is such-"

Spider-Man felt something touch his back and he leapt up in total surprise.

"AAAAAAH!"

Another yell echoed simultaneously.

"AAAAAAH!" 

The being Spidey bumped into literally shrunk a few sizes, with tears running down her eyes. Spider-Man quickly lowered his defensive stance and stared at the gray hooded girl in front of him. That saddened face was just too much.

"Hey… I'm sor-"

"AAAAAH!" 

Spidey was interrupted by another scream. He turned to see Brave give Happy a hard smack, causing the pink hooded girl to rub the back of her head.

"And why the hell are you screaming?"

"Uh, because everyone else was?" she giggled.

Gross and Brave sweat dropped as they shook their heads at their bimbo sister. Spidey didn't react to the antics too much as he was just staring at this new Raven who seemed to be frightened out of her mind. Apparently it was her timid side…

_Raven has a timid side? _He awed. _Wowzers._

"Hey… uh it's okay." Spider-Man whispered. "I'm sorry."

"No you're not," the girl whimpered.

"Of course… I am," Spidey stuttered. Seeing this Raven was definitely peculiar, she having a happy and a gross side was hard to grasp in itself. But seeing 'this' Raven was just mind boggling. That blue hooded girl never looked scared.

Never.

"Y-y-you don't like me," Timid assumed.

"What?" Spider-Man questioned. "No, no, no I like you. It's you that doesn't like me remember?"

"You like… me?"

"Of course,"

"… Really?" Timid's eyes grew a little brighter.

"Uh huh," Spidey nodded. "We're friends right?"

Timid stopped crying and just stared at the ground while Spider-Man was losing more of his sanity by the minute.

"Can't we be more than friends hot stuff?" Brave countered as she pushed and came face to face with the arachnoid.

"Yea, enough games we want to see your face and we want to see it now." Gross commanded.

"Come on girls… I-"

"Enough."

A new voice filled with strength chimed in. Spider-Man turned and sighed dismally as yet another Raven had shown up.

"Okay," He glared at Brave. "How many of 'you' are there?"

"Excuse my sisters Spider-Man, for they do not have the capacity to understand the nature of having manners."

"I am well aware of that." Spidey stated, staring at the Ravens who were now all gawking at him.

"Well I am not like them." This yellow hooded bifocal wearing Raven stated as she turned to her sisters, specifically Happy, Gross, and Brave. "You all are acting like a bunch of rabid dogs."

"Heh dogs? Wait a sec." Gross chuckled. "… That would make us bitches, wouldn't it?"

"Yea!" Brave grinned proudly. "We're Spidey's bitches. Hahahaha!"

The two once again gave that girl power high five as Gross belched.

"Ugh," Smart groaned in disgust.

"Riiight," Spider-Man sighed as he turned to Smart. "So I guess you're Raven's bookworm self?"

"You could call me that if you please. But that is irrelevant. I have a lot to discuss with you and if you want to leave this astral plane, I suggest you follow me."

"Shoot, don't have to tell me twice." Spidey muttered as he did as he was suggested, all the while the other Ravens stared at his every move, slowly trudging along with giggles erupting from their muffled mouths.

( - The H.I.V.E. - )

"And now Carnage productions presents for your distinct pleasure, "Teenage Love" brought to you by hand puppets."

Carnage stood happily behind a table along side Gizmo and Mammoth, with two hand puppets formed by his alien suit. The puppets had striking resemblances to a certain black symbiote and pink haired sorceress that we all know and love.

Only trouble could come out of this.

Only trouble.

"Hey everyone! I'm Jinx and I wuv my widdle Venny Poo!" Carnage performed his ventriloquist thing in the most feminine voice he could muster, acting out the scene with his Jinx marionette.

"Oh God," Gizmo muttered as he began to tear up with laughter.

"And piss off everyone! Because we are Venom!" Carnage mocked his father to perfection. "And we are so damn grumpy all the time because we literally have a stick lodged up our ass!"

Carnage began to flex with his Venom hand puppet making Gizmo and Mammoth fall over.

"Oh man," Mammoth groaned as he was clutching his stomach.

"Yea… I can't take much more of this..." Gizmo said muffling his face into the table.

"Oh Venom, I love you so much." Hand puppet Jinx begged. "Will you be my boyfriend?"

"Oh yes Jinx we love you so much too. Please we need you in our arms now."

Carnage began to press the two puppets together in a mock make out, making kissy noises and all that fuzzy goodness. Mammoth and Gizmo began to slap their heads in laughter that could be heard throughout the entire school.

"Oh Jinx, we think you're the cat's pajamas! Will you marry us?"

"Yes, Venom, oh yes!"

Carnage continued to have his off beat fun but he noticed the laughs suddenly died down. He looked at Gizmo and Mammoth who were now whistling with their backs turned. Carnage gulped.

"He's right behind me isn't he?"

Carnage was replied with slow nods.

"Nice," he turned to be met with a totally not amused Venom. Carnage reluctantly looked over Venom's shoulder to see Jinx who was leaning against the wall giggling, her cheeks a flush pink. He turned back to Venom whose face was still as intense.

"Hey pops, how was the-"

Carnage was suddenly muted by a choke.

"The way we see it you have two choices." Venom hissed. "You can either die slowly… or die even slower."

"Heh, can't it be really really slow?" The grip tightened. "As… in… dieing… of… old… age?" Carnage gagged jokingly.

"Put him down."

The Fearsome Five all turned to see Brother Blood clearly not in a good mood. The man literally looked to have been scorched by a bomb of some sort. Venom skewed at the sight as he dropped Carnage who stopped coughing enough to chuckle as he noticed left over scraps from his T.V. set lodged in Blood's hair and pieces held in his hands.

"What the hell happened to you?" Venom questioned as he turned to Carnage, who just shrugged indifferently.

"No need for specifics," Blood sighed as he looked at the five teenagers with his eyes glowing. "Alright my students, tonight is the night you five will strike. Prepare yourselves. Soon the Teen Titans will learn that this city is no longer their own…"

The Fearsome Five looked at one another as sadistic grins grew on their faces.

The time had come.

( - Raven's Mind - )

"Okay so let me get this straight," Spider-Man huffed, sitting cross-legged across from Smart upon the rocky grounds of Raven's astral planes. "So Raven has to keep her emotions bottled up inside so that her powers don't go completely haywire, correct?"

"Correct,"

"So in turn there are eight of you spirits which are the result of her breaking her soul into separate entities to keep her emotions in check, right?"

"Right,"

"Oh," Spidey nodded in semi-understanding. "So that's why Raven's kinda uh… well…"

"Dead pan?"

"Hah, you said it."

Smart giggled a bit as she fixed her bifocals.

"… No wonder she is so drawn to you."

"Uh who's drawn to me?" Spider-Man ogled. "Raven?"

"Of course,"

"You're kidding me." Spidey stated wide-eyed.

"I kid you not."

"Uh," Spidey grew tense. "She sure doesn't act like it."

"My naïve spider, it is difficult for even the common girl to show their admiration for another." Smart countered. "Now think how hard it is for a person like Raven to do so."

"Hmm," Spidey scratched his chin. "Intrigue me oh wise one!" his mask eyes widened like a kitten's would.

"Charming," Smart laughed again only to grow serious. "Raven was forced to create us and keep us isolated from the real world out of fear that she would become out of control. There are two types of spirits that she had to create. There are the positives and the negatives."

"… And I am guessing that pink one is a negative?"

"Hey! I heard that!" Happy pouted as she was playing patty cake with Timid, who by her non-participation in the game apparently didn't know they were playing in the first place.

"Joking," Spidey yelled over to her. "Sorry yellow, please continue."

"Spider-Man, your high-spirited nature has given us, her spirits, all a glimpse of the outside world to which she prevents us from seeing."

"Um, come again?"

"Raven is afraid to feel because of her inability to control her negative energies. But since you have arrived, she's been slowly opening up all be it reluctantly."

"Wait, a sec." Spidey began to realize something. "So if most of you think I'm funny then that means she did laugh at that Cyborg joke didn't she?"

"… I'm afraid so."

"Hah! I so knew it!" Spider-Man celebrated by doing a little dance. "Who made Raven laugh? I did! Ow!"

"In all seriousness here, your positive influence is having an affect on her very sub-conscious nature." Smart sighed. "So I… no… we… beg you to continue to push her."

"Push her?" Spidey stopped his jig. "Uh what do you mean? Like off a cliff? Uh, I don't think she'll like that very much."

"No," Smart groaned at the joke. "I am telling you to let her emotions out. Make her laugh. Make her happy."

"But, uh, I thought you said that was a bad thing?"

"Raven," Smart sighed at her thoughts. "She's hardheaded. She believes that she cannot feel happiness because in turn she'll become soft and let her other emotions take over. Truthfully she's only lying to herself."

"So, you want me to make Raven laugh… even if she threatens my life?"

"If you please,"

"Alrighty then," Spider-Man paused in deep thought, only to be interrupted.

"Okay enough of this nerd girl." Brave suddenly jumped in and grabbed Spidey in a playful headlock. "This bore talk is so over."

"Yay! Let's play!" Happy laughed.

"You do know that if you want to play with me, my head still needs to be intact right?" Spidey mumbled in Brave's tight grip as she began giving him a playful noogie.

"Hello all." A voice that reaped of evil whispered as three new Ravens with dark glares appeared - one in purple, one in brown, and the one that spoke who was in blood red.

"Why the hell are you here?" The other five Ravens growled as they eyed the one in red.

"Nice to see you too sisters," The four eyed spirit growled as the ones in brown and purple stood silent along side her.

Wrapped in countless chains and with eyes glowing a dark red, Spider-Man gulped as he stared at this Raven. Suddenly he felt a body press up against him and he looked to see that it was Timid, hiding behind him.

"Um, can I hide behind you, this time?" Spidey muttered as the red eyed Raven glared at him with blood thirsty eyes.

"So you're the one that has been on Raven's mind." Anger chuckled as she examined a literally frozen Spider-Man. "You are impressive on the battlefield. Tell me, how would you feel about murdering an innocent bystander and eating their innards?"

"Um, I'd say I'm in for anything new?" Spider-Man gulped with that sarcasm still ringing from his tone.

Those red eyes continued to examine.

"Hah," Anger's eyes glowed. "I like you little spider. I'd love to have you for dinner sometime."

"You're not going to eat him you vile spirit." Smart scowled.

"You just threatened to eat me?" Spider-Man received a playful nod. "Um, besides those four red eyes and sharp teeth I'd say you'd be the closest to Raven eh?"

"Indeed,"

_Heh Carnage would love this one. _Spider-Man thought.

"Oh well sisters I can see why Raven would like him." Anger finally backed off. "Although I truly doubt Father would approve."

"WHO CARES!" All other Ravens yelled making Anger sweat drop.

"Alright enough of this stalling!" Gross hissed. "I want some action and I want some now. So what do you say girls? Off with the mask?"

"Heck yea," Brave agreed as all Ravens besides Anger, Smart, and Timid slowly began to encircle our Spidey.

"Wait, come on gals can't you just use your imagination?"

His pleas fell on deaf ears and soon Spidey found himself in a Raven dog pile. Smoke began to kick up as hints of flailing heads, arms, and legs shot out of the clouds of dust. 'Hey!'s, 'Watch it!'s, and 'Gah!'s filled the air as the struggling continued at a furious rate.

Soon the dust cleared and Spider-Man slowly realized that he was being pinned down by Gross and Brave, one around his arms, and the other his legs. He struggled to free himself from their grasps but their strength in this astral world was just too much. Spidey gave in to the hold and sighed while going limp, literally being wrapped in hugs.

"Come on Ravens… Give me a break-"

"Give me break! Break me off a piece of that Kit Kat bar!" Happy finished the song, giggling as she jumped on him. The pink cloaked Raven smiled as she playfully poked Spidey's head, preparing to pull his mask off.

"No! Don't do it!"

Happy grabbed onto the crimson cloth and slowly began to pull up, with all Ravens glaring in anticipation.

It truly looked as if Spider-Man secret identity was going to be only a thing of the past.

"Is there a problem here?"

It wasn't.

All eyes turned to the new voice - a voice that made Spidey plainly jump for joy.

"RAVEN!"

Brave, Happy, and Gross all sighed as they saw their true self. They reluctantly stopped their pulling and tugging at Spidey's costume and Spider-Man quickly leapt up feeling Brave and Gross's releasing grips. In a charge he ran over to Raven and leapt at her feet, wrapping his arms around her ankles.

"Thank-you-thank-you-thank-you-thank-you-thank-you!" Raven only rolled her eyes as she telepathically lifted Spidey off of her and tossed him aside.

"Will you get a grip?" Raven scowled.

"Well, I had one until you just tossed me," Spider-Man moped. "And that hurt I might add."

"You're lucky I don't do worse to you." Raven stated. "I told you not to go into my room."

"Heh heh heh," Spidey scratched his neck. "And now I know why!"

Raven stood silent and Spidey cracked instantly.

"I'm sorry."

Raven pressed her hand towards one of the portal gates and a warp hole quickly formed.

"Just go." Raven commanded.

"But-"

"Go!" Raven's eyes turned white.

"Fine," Spidey sighed as he glanced at all eight of Raven's shadows who were staring at him with their unique glares. Of course Brave, Gross, and Happy gave winks that caused him to mope his way into the portal and with one big flash Spidey's weirdest adventure ever had ended.

"Wow, he was totally fun." Happy leapt at Raven, bouncing up and down.

"Yea, you should invite him in more often 'true' me." Gross scratched her armpit. "I think we really connected," she turned towards Brave. "Don't you think?"

"Dream on," Brave countered. "He liked me the best."

"I don't know," Anger chimed in. "He did look at me a bit warmly at times."

There was an awkward pause.

"Right," Brave scowled. "And what would you know about warmth you Exorcist girl wannabe?"

"Aw don't be so angry at each other!" Happy grinned. "Because he liked me the best anyway!"

"Shut up." Raven grinded her teeth together, "All of you,"

They all complied except for a certain red hooded spirit.

"Why don't you release me from my bonds and say that again blue?"

"Whatever," Raven flipped her cape as she walked off after Spider-Man. With one cold glare she turned. "By the way if I learn that any of you gave away any of my inner most secrets? … Let's just say we're going to have a little talk later."

All Ravens glared upon Smart who began to chuckle nervously, down sizing a few.

"Ugh," Raven rolled her eyes as she walked into the portal, vanishing from sight as well.

All of her spirits looked at one another and sighed.

"So… what do we do now?" Brave asked.

"Uh, we could always force Angry over here to listen to some Kenny G." Gross replied.

"What?" Anger pouted. "NO!"

The other Ravens grinned as they prepared to torture Anger in the most inhumane way possible.

( - Raven's Room - )

Clank.

Plop.

Crash.

Bonk.

These of course were the noises that were made as Spider-Man slowly backpedaled away from Raven, knocking over random furnishings and books left and right.

"Oops," A gargoyle statue suddenly shattered. Spidey quickly picked up the pieces and hurriedly attempted to put it together, only to see it fall apart. He looked up and those amethyst eyes glared upon him with ferocity.

"Uh… I'll pay for that."

Spidey was now literally tripping over himself as he continued reeling back. He abruptly stopped at the door and held up his hands in surrender.

"Okay-okay-okay!" He paused. "Before you rip my head off I just wanted to tell you it was totally an accident."

"Really?" Raven scowled. "So you walked into my room and used my mirror completely by accident?"

"Well… uh… if you put it that way…"

Raven didn't look amused.

"I'm sorry…"

"Ugh," Raven prepared to shut the door. "Just leave."

"No Raven please," he begged. "Totally my bad!"

"Apology accepted." Raven said it quickly, and pressed the button on her door to shut it but a red hand forced it open.

"Alright," Spider-Man perked up. "Look Raven we haven't started off on a good foot and uh… can't we just start over?"

" . . . "

"Um, maybe we can just hang out sometime?" Spider-Man asked innocently. "I mean I've had the pleasure of sparring with Robin, fixing up cars with Cyborg, shooting spitballs with Beast Boy, and shopping with Starfire-"

Images of pink shirts scorched his mind.

"Okay so not everything was a total pleasure, but you get the idea right?" Spidey grinned weakly as Raven stood silent. "But anyway, uh, you and I we've never done anything."

"That isn't a coincidence." Raven replied coldly.

"Oh," Spidey deflated. Raven bit her lip and shook her head.

"Don't think it's just you." Raven added. "… I'm just not a people person."

"Why not?"

"Ugh what is this 60 minutes?" Raven groaned.

"Come on, it'll be fun. We can do whatever you do. I'll just tag along like a puppy or something."

Raven paused as she stared at those mask eyes which almost seemed to be calling out for some slack.

"I'll think about it." She sighed and with that the door shut in Spidey's face. Spider-Man just scratched his head with hesitation.

"Okay, uh, you go do that Raven. I'll just be uh, hanging upside down in my room or something."

Raven heard the footsteps fading away and she finally breathed easy. She strolled over to her bed and sat down angered.

"The nerve of that guy," Raven growled to herself. "Invades my privacy, and now he expects me to be friendly with him?"

She bit her lip as she continued to stew over him. Why didn't she completely just go off on him like she would usually do? They weren't friends. She barely knew him. He didn't deserve an ounce of pity. He didn't.

It was only now Raven began to truly worry herself over what Smart had probably told him. The way Spider-Man was acting post-mirror incident just screamed 'I know you don't hate me as much as you want me to think'. Did he really know that she had a crush on him?

Raven just sighed.

_No… I can't like him anyway. _Raven moped in thought. _He's too goofy and obnoxious. It just wouldn't be right. It just wouldn't…_

Raven continued to ponder as she lay back on her bed totally exhausted. She prepared to telepathically reach for her pillow but as she leaned back she felt something uncomfortable near her head. She turned and found 'the gift'.

It was a photograph, a photograph of 'her'.

"What?" The picture turned black and soared into Raven's hand and she stared at it. She quickly turned it around and saw a note written in black ink. The note read:

_Whoa, look at you Raven! You're totally kickin' baddie ass! Please don't let this be me!_

_Thanks for the hospitality,_

_Your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man_

Raven turned the picture around, and then turned it around again. She glared at the note and couldn't help but chuckle a bit to herself. She placed the picture back on her bed and stared at her mirror which was still on the floor.

… Maybe what Spider-Man learned wasn't a bad thing after all.

Or at least not as bad as the events soon to come,


	8. Date With Destiny II

"Alright, I know I said this about like three hundred times dude,"

"Yea…"

"But I'm tellin' ya man I really really really don't think this is such a good idea!" Cyborg finished with that famous high-pitched fashion while he and Spider-Man strolled down the darkened hallways of Titans Tower. Spidey just sighed as he rolled his eyes away from his cybernetic partner in crime.

"Cy trust me, I know what I'm doing."

"Man, that's what you always say!"

"And when have I ever been wrong?" Spidey questioned. Cyborg then replied with a cold glare which Spider-Man only scoffed at.

"Oh come on, when?"

"Gee I dunno," Cyborg mocked. "Uh maybe the time you told me to go bungee jumping off of Wayne Towers using one of your weblines?"

"… Oh yeah," Spidey stuttered, "But hey, it's not like the webline snapped or anything."

"Right," Cyborg mockingly agreed. "But you didn't take into consideration that your weblines would have so much give that I'd be propelled to a higher elevation than I started at!"

"Huh, okay fine." Spidey surrendered. "One bad suggestion, no one's perfect. Besides," he elbowed Cyborg, "You gotta admit it was pretty funny."

Cyborg just gave an even colder stare with his LED eye lighting up.

"Um okay, it wasn't that funny." Spidey shrank.

The two slowly made their way down the halls with their 'too cool for school' strolls until they came to the room in question. The sign on the metallic door of course read:

RAVEN

Cyborg sighed in a whisper, "Are you sure you wanna do this?"

"Definitely," Spider-Man nodded with confidence. "Once I put my mind to something I just gotta do it."

"Man why don't you just put that much effort into eating Starfire's cooking?"

Spider-Man gasped.

"What do you think I am? Crazy?"

"Uh yea,"

" . . . "

"Look man it's already bad enough you went into Raven's head." Cyborg paused, shuttering at the horrific memories. "And I know for a fact that's already mental suicide, but now you want to do _this?"_

"Yea I want to do _this._" Spidey grumbled. "A spider's gotta do what a spider's gotta do."

"What spin web? Eat flies? Annoy the hell out of people?"

"Yes, all those things."

Huff.

"Fine whatever, it's your call." Cyborg gave up. "Watching Raven choke the life out of you might be pretty entertaining anyway."

"Thanks for your support."

"No prob Bob."

"Yea, yea, yea okay. Now let's get to work."

"Right on," Cyborg flipped his arm cover off. "Let's see what I got on the good ol' iPod shall we?"

A bloop, a bleep, and a zoink later, his iPod monitor popped up showing a dazzling array of music from the urban sounds of hip hop to the spicy Latin flavors of salsa. Cyborg chuckled at Spidey's enlarged eyes as he began to stroll through the menus and screens finding the right song for this particular mission.

"Alright, what song would you like Redman?"

"Why don't we try some dance music er, Method Man."

The two heroes strolled down the list with curious glares.

"N'sync?" Spider-Man went wide-eyed.

"Yea, let's not talk about that." Cyborg quickly strolled past the boy band in question and continued to read the passing names quickly.

"Moby?"

"Nah."

"M.C. Hammer?"

"Nah."

"Weird Al Yankovich?"

"Hell no."

"The Spice Girls?"

"I don't... wait a sec. What!" Spider-Man gasped. "The Spice Girls?"

"Um… yea… you see… back in the-"

"Dude, that's perfect!"

Cyborg slapped his head, making sure he heard that clearly.

"Oh jeez you're not going to use them are you?"

Spider-Man only nodded mischievously and Cyborg groaned.

"Raven is so going to kill you."

"She won't," Spider-Man gulped. "… Hopefully anyway,"

( - Inside Raven's Room - )

The art of meditation as Raven knew it was something only true mystics could understand. This isn't your Beverly Hills pseudo yoga, also known as that 'I'm so sophisticated and posh that I need to sit and look cool' kind of meditation. This was the real deal. This was where the mind truly settles into a peaceful state to cleanse one's astral self of all negative energies.

But lately Raven's subconscious has been in a total loop of lunacy. Her negative and positive energies were becoming unbalanced at the spiritual level, her emotions literally going hectic. And to think this was all because of one certain loud mouth hero in red spandex. And no, it wasn't the Flash.

_Okay Raven, this is just like any other day, just focus and it'll all go away. _She convinced herself. _it'll all go away…_

"Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos" the words began to be whispered from her mouth, that chant channeling her spiritual aura evenly throughout her body. Her breaths became calm as that mystical healing did its magic, giving some of that peace that Raven always sorely needed. Complete silence was all she heard around her, concentrating on the three very words that gave tranquility to her soul.

Yes, nothing could interrupt her now…

Nothing…

(Cue the Song from Hell!)

The sounds of a very familiar beat that brought horrors to millions over the years blasted through Raven's door like nails on a chalkboard, sending her crashing to the floor out of surprise. The dizzying assortment of corny drum bashing and cheesy guitar playing was driving her insane as she rubbed the bump on her poor lil ol' head.

"What is going on?" Raven grumbled as she began to hear voices singing along karaoke style from right outside her door.

"Spider Man?" Raven's eyes widened horrifically. "... Cyborg?"

_Spider-Man: Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want!  
_

_Cyborg: So tell me what you want, what you really really want!  
_

_Spider-Man: I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want!  
_

_Cyborg: So tell me what you want, what you really really want!  
_

_Spider-Man: I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna- _

_Cyborg: I wanna really really get down with a Spider-Man jam!_

"Oh my Azar." Raven muttered, more afraid than she had ever been in her entire life.

_Spider-Man: If you want my future? Forget my past! _

_Cyborg: Forget it! _

_  
Spider-Man: If you wanna get with me better make it fast! _

_Cyborg: Oh yeah!  
_

_Spider-Man: Now don't go wasting, my precious time!_

_Cyborg: Don't waste it!_

_  
Spider-Man: Get your act together we could be just fine!_

_Cyborg: Booyah!_

As Spider-Man and Cyborg were finishing out their horrific vocals to the second chorus, Raven just had about enough. She took a couple of deep breaths as she clutched her ears, opening the door to see a scene that was flat out scary.

That scene was of Cyborg and Spidey having a little too much fun jamming - being hooked up with mics to the half-droid's onboard karaoke set. Raven's eyes popped wide open as she was literally twitching in fear and irritation. These two boys didn't even notice her as they were just that freakishly into the music, bobbing their heads totally oblivious.

Spidey was definitely singing his precious little heart out, "I'll tell ya what I want, what I really really want! OW! If you wannabe my lover! You gotta get with my-"

"YIKES!" Suddenly Cyborg yelped as his speakers exploded in a brilliant display of sparks. Spider-Man froze with microphone in hand as he turned and saw Raven with that always non amused face.

"Sheesh." He sighed, "You didn't even let us get to the second verse."

Raven's eyes flared, "What are you two doing?"

Nervous gulps.

"Uh, Robin?" Cyborg muttered to the air. "Oh yeah, I think hear Robin calling." he lied. "Don't worry Rob! I'm on my way!"

The half-droid then took off as quick as lightning, darting down the hallways and leaving Spidey in the dust.

"Hey! How am I going to finish this song without the accompanying music?"

Spider-Man turned only to be met with Raven again.

"Is this your idea of a joke?" Raven asked coldly.

"What?"

"What do you mean 'what'?"

"You mean my singing?"

" . . . "

Spider-Man deflated, "I wasn't that bad was I?"

Suddenly Spidey yelled out as he was grabbed forcibly by the collar of his costume. Raven yanked him to a face to face glare with of course Spider-Man cowering in fear.

"Wow, you're strong." Spider-Man mused. "You've been working out with Cyborg haven't you?"

"Look," Raven growled irritably. "I've had enough of your antics, haven't you bugged me enough today?"

"Oh come on, you know I was totally kickin' it with that Spice Girls song."

"The only thing that is gonna get 'kicked' is your rear end if you ever sing that again. Besides, I'm meditating right now so if you'll excuse me, maybe you can do your karaoke thing elsewhere."

"But, that karaoke thing was for you." Spider-Man informed. "I was serenading you."

"You were what?" Raven's eyes grew blank as she released him.

Spidey straightened out his costume, "Starfire told me that you were going to some poetry club tonight and long behold, for some crazy reason you haven't invited me yet."

Loud mouthed Starfire apparently had struck again.

Raven huffed, "Yea but-"

"So I thought this could help my chances in being invited."

"Wait," Raven glared questionably, "You thought 'this' would make me feel so good that I'd just let you come along?"

"Hah! Hell no," Spider-Man corrected, "I was thinking I would threaten you with this singing all night until you'd let me come along."

"… You wouldn't."

"Heh, wouldn't I?"

Raven groaned, "That's just cold blooded."

"I'm a spider remember?" Spider-Man teased.

It looked like our Raven didn't have much of a choice and her silence made Spider-Man jump for joy. The answer was already apparently written over that frowning face.

"Yay!" Spider-Man patted her on her hooded head, "I'll get my camera!"

Poor poor Raven.

"… Damn nation."

( - City Side - )

"Civilians," Venom sighed as he looked over the edge atop of an abandoned tower. "They're so helpless it's disgusting."

"Yep," Mammoth agreed, resting his large figure upon heavy crates. "Fun to pick on though,"

"This is going to be so fun!" Jinx commented as she was filing her nails. "I can't wait to see the looks on those Titans' faces when they see us."

Suddenly Venom heard a 'ksst' noise that meant his communicator was being called. The symbiote picked up his H.I.V.E. communicator and listened in as the sounds kept echoing.

_**Ksst…**_

_**Ksst…**_

_**Ksst…**_

_**Ksst…**_

"Carnage," Venom spoke into the intercom.

"Hmmm?"

"Uh, what are you doing?"

"I'm making cool noises with our new toys duh."

"Oh, are you having fun?"

"Yes I am."

"Good make this worth your while." Venom hissed. "Because once you get back up here we're going to get to kill you."

"What? Why?"

"That shit is annoying."

"Huh," Carnage groaned. "Sheesh, fine lame-o I'll stop."

There was silence.

_**Kssst…**_

"Sorry, one more for the road."

"Ugh," Venom tossed his hand into his face. "Will you get serious Carnage?"

"Dude," Carnage hissed. "Call me by my code name!"

"What? Hell no!"

"Do it or this conversation is over."

Venom groaned as he angrily clenched his free fist, "Fine… 'Brad Pitt'." the words escaped through grinding teeth.

"Good call 'Tom Cruise'. How are 'Angelina Jolie', 'Michael Jackson', and 'Big Foot'?"

"Shut up and give us a report would you?"

"Alrighty, uh the dilly is fine over here. No Teeny Titans in sight."

"Great, then get your ass back up on the roof." Venom commanded. "We need to plan this out carefully and last thing we want is you messing anything up."

"Okie dokie, but I need to test something first."

Distorted scuffling could be heard and Venom looked at his teammates puzzlingly.

"Okay, can you hear me now?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Good."

More scuffling.

"Okay, can you hear me now?"

"Um, yes but-"

"Good."

There was more scuffling and Venom was about to explode.

"Okay can you-"

"For your sake there better be a point to this!"

Awkward pause

"Uh, do I ever have a point?"

Venom cringed, "You are so dead!"

"Damn will you chill out scuzz ball?" Gizmo growled as he continued to work. "I think the whole city heard you."

Venom took a deep breath as he spoke into his communicator, "Just get up here."

"But I'm already up here." Carnage chuckled on his walkie talkie. Venom turned and yelled in surprise as Carnage was right in his face with that ugly grin. The other three H.I.V.E. members simply jaw dropped at what Carnage was wearing.

"Guys, you wouldn't believe it! They're giving away free sombreros at Tacos Caliente tonight!" Carnage danced a salsa inspired tune. "La cu cu racha! La cu cu racha! Na na-na-na-na-na na!"

"Whoa cool!" Venom exclaimed too overly excited. "Let us see that hat up close."

Carnage strolled over and bowed his head so Venom could see the giant sombrero. The crimson symbiote was graciously thanked by a vicious slap to the head, knocking his hat over the building. Carnage gasped as he watched it fall story by story and after a dramatic pause he turned to Venom with angered eyes.

"Now why'd you have to go do that you jerk?"

"Because you're a freaking poon,"

"Jeez, don't have to be so harsh."

"The truth is always harsh."

"Wait," Jinx interrupted the arguing as she stared over the edge. "Is that grumpy?"

"Grumpy?" Gizmo questioned as he leapt up and walked over to Jinx. With a press of the button a pair of hi-tech binoculars sprouted from his backpack. The night vision equipped visual enhancers zoomed in on the person in question and he nodded.

"Yea it is." Gizmo smiled like the evil baby-faced boy he was. "It's that creepy Titan," he turned to Venom, "And she's with your friend."

"Really?" Venom questioned as he hopped to the edge to confirm this new info. The symbiote smiled as he saw that costume of red and blue he hated so much. With a pause of thought, he turned to his teammates and lashed his tongue out.

"Hah, alright kiddies, change of plans."

( - Down On the Streets Below - )

"This is going to be so fun!" Spider-Man yelled as he caught another webline and soared above the streets of Jump City, not caring about the weird looks he was getting. This 'non care' of his public image wasn't farfetched, considering this was a kid who wore red and blue spider tights that looked like kiddy pajamas.

Raven on the other hand was as red cheeked as can be, totally embarrassed as she glared at the snooping eyes of the public. It was already bad enough when they were acting 'normal', Raven being a super hero and all. But Spidey's goofiness sure wasn't helping her distaste in attention.

With a sigh Raven made sure her hood covered her face as she attempted to ignore the stares, soaring adjacent to the webslinger with that gift of levitation.

"It's just Spidey and Raven, kicking it old school!" Spider-Man celebrated, catching another webline. "You pumped too right Rae?"

"Yea," Raven droned with that somber sophisticated tone. "I can't even contain my excitement."

"Really," Spidey sighed as he soared by Raven upside down, "And by golly you can cut the sarcasm with a knife."

Raven giggled a bit on the inside at Spidey's sportscaster mockery as the two continued to fly to their desired destination. Spider-Man's eyes were pretty wide as he wasn't too familiar with Jump City's night life – busy fighting crime in the week he has been here. At first glance it wasn't as hectic as the New York City's 24/7 bonanza, but as the ghettofied peeps would say "It was still pretty bumpin' fo sho".

"So, are you going to give me the cold shoulder all night Raven?" Spider-Man broke the silence as he caught up to her once again with a pull of his webline.

"I can try." Raven replied as she kept looking forward.

"Oh give it up, I'm going to crack you sooner or later. I grow on people quite quickly if I say so myself."

"Sorta like fungus?"

"Hah! That was a good one!" Spider-Man laughed as he flipped.

"Happy to amuse you," Raven rolled her eyes.

There was an uneasy silence as Spidey pondered what to do next.

"Ahem, so anyway, where's the first stop on this little date of ours?"

Suddenly Raven's soaring came to a dead stop and Spidey flailed wildly to pause on a dime as he swayed like a pendulum on his webline. Raven's eyes turned white as she gave a look that would bring even the bravest souls to their knees.

"… Did I say something?" Spider-Man whimpered as he continued to sway back and fourth.

"This… isn't… a… date." Raven's eyes turned to fire. "YOU GOT THAT?"

"Gah!" Spider-Man yelped in fear as he nodded as fast as possible. "Okay-okay-okay, this isn't a date."

Raven fumed as she turned and continued to hover off in her own little world causing Spider-Man to let out a sigh of relief. It was Smart's words of wisdom that kept him upbeat as he followed her, chuckling inside at this façade of bitterness Raven created.

It was sort of cute knowing how much emotion she was holding back but at the same time it was even more admirable. Spidey knew he wouldn't last a second if he was forced to do what she had to do. This kid wore his emotions on his sleeve.

"Yellow, was right." Spider-Man muttered to himself as he whipped over to Raven. "She deserves some fun."

A few more minutes of levitation and web-slinging and our two heroes found their way into the most happening depressed lounge in all of Jump City.

'The Eclipse Café'

Spider-Man landed along side Raven and stared at the gimmicky café with puppy eyes. His sights were set on the illuminating words as he turned to Raven who was glaring at him questionably.

"The words are so purdy." Spider-Man smiled. Raven only rolled her eyes. The arachnoid walked over to the gothic styled doorway and pushed it open. "Ladies first,"

Raven took the gesture with that usual insensitive front, this sorceress being the last woman on Earth that would want to be treated like a prissy spoiled girl. With determination she walked past Spider-Man wanting to completely ignore him but it was just impossible. It was just too innocent and sweet.

"Thanks," She muttered under her breath.

Spider-Man nodded, "You're very welcome."

Raven turn to acknowledge him but suddenly yelped, "Ah!"

It was a flash from a camera that temporarily blinded her. She rubbed her eyes furiously as she turned to Spider-Man who was twirling that annoying camera in his hand.

"Now this is going to be a good picture." Spider-Man admired. "The first time Raven ever thanked me for anything. Heh, I'll be sure to cherish this one."

"You're really something you know that?" Raven growled as she tantrum'd her way into the café. Spider-Man nodded.

"Yep, I am 'something'."

Spider-Man walked in and instantly his comfort level soared to new lows. This place was dark - Raven's room dark. Disturbing furniture, paintings, and statues didn't help matters too much either. It was just so gloomy. But the scariest thing was that everyone that was in the area looked even gloomier.

"Raven." A gothic looking teenager who apparently worked here greeted in a whisper. "Nice to see you,"

"Same here Sabrina."

"Whoa," Sabrina eyed Spider-Man. "You actually brought one of your teammates down here?" The girl commented. "Getting soft on me Raven,"

"My hands are tied."

"She's joking," Spider-Man defended. "She invited me."

"… Is this true?"

Raven didn't even reply, not even thinking it was worth dwelling on.

"Nice costume," Sabrina commented on Spidey's rather bright clothing. "You'll fit right in."

"Always do."

"Okay, uh, well make yourselves comfortable. It's improv night, have fun you two lovebirds."

Raven gasped, "Wait a minute, he's not-"

"Just have fun."

Raven gave up on keeping her dark isolated reputation spotless and walked off to her usual table which was of course towards the back. She nodded at the 'usuals' who showed up to this dark place of despair as she sat quietly and glared to the stage. Spider-Man quickly followed suit, staying as close to Raven as possible, noticing the dark glares from this group of depressed souls that calling "mildly happy" would be a crime in all states.

The two sat down as amateur poets of all ages were giving improv a shot. Of course the lyrics consisted of the most dark and angsty words ever created by mankind.

"Wow, that's just so deep." Spider-Man commented.

Raven skewed, "Uh, you do know that he's just checking his microphone right?"

Spider-Man began to listen attentively as he noticed the words he commented on were 'Mic check one two three.' The arachnoid chuckled as he pointed.

"Hah, I was just testing you." Spider-Man saved himself. "And you passed."

"Yay." Raven muttered as a waiter came by to get them drinks. The sorceress ordered her usual special tea and Spider-Man of course had to make things more difficult.

"Um, do you have any root beer or something?"

Only blank glares were exchanged between Raven and the server.

"7-up?"

More blank stares.

"Red Bull?"

Sweat drops.

"O-k, I'll just have what she's having then."

Nods.

Spider-Man playfully twiddled his fingers as he looked up at Raven who was more or less ignoring him. He sighed as he stretched.

"So Raven," He whispered as he stretched. "How are you doing?"

"Relatively good," She responded while looking on at the depressed soul on stage pouring his heart out.

"Come here often?"

"… You could say that."

"Cool, uh," Spidey looked around at the dead serious stares. "This place is um… lively."

"Agreed,"

Obviously this small chat was obviously going nowhere and Spider-Man was sick of it.

"Okay, look Raven, about that whole mirror thing I just wanted to say-"

"Drinks are served." The waiter dropped two cups of herbal tea that steamed that strong aroma. Spidey curiously took a whiff and shook his head from the alien smell. Raven only smirked at his curiosity as she took that much needed sip.

"Well always good to try new things as they say." Spidey slowly reached for his mask causing Raven to freeze up immediately. Was she going to get to see his face?

"There we go." Spider-Man smiled his pearly whites as his mask was now up to his nose. Raven smirked on the outside while sighing on the inside. Like her emotions were saying to Spider-Man before, she desperately wanted to see the boy's face that has been driving her emotions over the top.

Spidey brought the tea up to his mouth and sipped it quickly. As one could imagine a suppressed gag followed and teary eyes formed after that. Raven looked on in amusement as Spidey coughed that sucker down. He looked at Raven with a weak smile.

"Tastey," he said in a coarse voice.

Cough.

_He's so silly. _Raven thought at his pure expose of innocence as she turned towards the stage area. Spider-Man turned as well and the two listened in on the freestyle poetry with of course Spidey showing a semi-interest in the dark soliloquy being read. Raven took notice.

"Look, if you're bored you could just head back to the tower."

"Bored?" Spidey seemed insulted. "I'm not bored."

"Don't lie."

"I'm not."

Raven only shrugged and Spidey fumed.

"Hey just because I wear bright blue and red, and I'm upbeat at times-"

"At times?"

"Fine, I'm always upbeat."

"Better."

"Be that as it may," Spidey grinned, "I do have a dark side in me too ya know."

"Riiiight,"

"I do." Spider-Man said as loud as a whisper could let him. "This suit wasn't always blue and red ya know. Once it was all black."

"All black?" Raven grew curious.

"Yep, pitch black."

"Interesting." Raven nodded. "But that doesn't change the fact that you just aren't dark."

"Oh really Ms. 'I know all'," Spider-Man smirked. "Fine, why don't I prove it to you?"

"What?"

Spider-Man looked up to the stage and noticed the open mic, he stood up from his chair and walked up to the stage with a confident strut.

"He wouldn't." Raven's eyes became fearful as she didn't even want to think about what Spider-Man was about to do. Yes everyone, our Spidey was going to take his shot at releasing his oh so poetic self.

Be afraid.

Be very afraid.

"Okay can everyone hear me?" Spider-Man hit the mic a couple of times sending feedback that pierced people's eardrums. The grimaces were enough of an answer. "Alrighty then! Well first off I want to say that I'm dedicating this to my main girl… Raven!"

He waved at her making everyone in the café turn with questioning glares. Raven slowly sank into her chair knowing exactly what was going to happen next.

( - Thirty Seconds Later - )

"Ouch! Hey! Stop!" Spider-Man yelped repeatedly. Our arachnoid wildly blocked a few projectiles with crazy swats as an assorted array of things such as napkin holders and Marilyn Manson CDs were being tossed at him. After a few last items that pelted him on the back it stopped as he made it out the door.

"Sheesh, can't these people take a joke?" He huffed angrily as Raven manifested herself in front of him. She only shook her head at him as if he were some sort of idiot.

"What did you expect?" Raven scowled. "You can't just walk up there and start singing the Happy Days song and expect to live."

"Well I couldn't think of anything else as dark as that okay? Besides it doesn't get much darker than that."

"I'm sure." Raven groaned as her reputation at this café was forever tarnished. The two were quickly met with Sabrina who came bursting out the door.

"Ah, I'm sorry for what happened in there." She looked at Spider-Man. "I hope you're not too hurt."

"Eh I'll live."

She turned to Raven, "Well I hope you come back Raven. I'm sorry the crowd didn't take too kindly to your boyfriend-"

Raven turned red, "He's… not… my… BOYFRIEND!" she retorted angrily as she walked off steaming.

Sabrina turned to Spider-Man who shook his head. "Sorry but my little honey buns is a little antsy about letting our relationship being known to the public. You see she's a little shy and-OOOW!"

Sabrina stared blankly as Raven had Spidey by his ear and began to drag him away.

"Ouch Raven, okay-okay-okay, it was a joke. GAH!"

( - Five Minutes Later - )

"Didn't think hanging out was going to be so painful," Spidey mumbled as he touched his aching ear. Raven continued her angry struts as the two continued to walk down the streets of Jump City with Raven's threatening glares keeping the public away. Spider-Man chuckled as he rubbed his ache.

"So what do you want to do now?"

Raven stared blankly, "First off you can stop with this whole 'we're on a date' vibe."

"Oh come on, I'm just playing around." Spider-Man answered. "Seriously, can't you ever admit that you're just having fun? I mean when I was in your mind I-"

"Just drop it."

Spider-Man quickly complied with pity as the two continued their silent walk to the bay area. She turned and stared at him behind the shadows of her hood.

"We're going back to the Tower."

"What? But the night's still young!"

"What else do you want to do? Get me thrown out of my favorite bookstore too?"

"Sorry, they still love you and you know it." Spider-Man laughed innocently while scratching his head.

"Whatever."

Apparently winning over Raven wasn't going to be as easy as he hoped. But Spider-Man wasn't one to give up so easily and victory was going to be his, one way or the other.

"I know this didn't start off too smooth but the rest of the night is going to be totally kickass. I prom-"

"The _rest_ of the night?"

"Uh huh," Spider-Man nodded. "We can do anything we want!"

"No," Raven replied bluntly. "I'm going home."

"Ahem, no you're not." Spider-Man cleared his throat and took one deep breath. "Cause I'll tell ya what I want what I really really want! So tell me what you want what you really really-"

Raven quickly brought her hand over his blabbering mouth and sighed.

"… This is so not fair."

"Sure it is! Look all I want to do hang out with you for one night. Is that so much to ask?"

Spider-Man stood silent as the two stared at one another. Raven grumbled under her breath as her conflicting emotions were just plain annoying. She whimpered in defeat as she just nodded.

"… I guess not."

Spider-Man smiled, "Good, because I am totally in the mood for a movie."

"A movie? No, if you want to watch a movie you can go watch it your-"

Raven felt a pull of her arm and after traveling as it seemed miles in a five second span she found herself dizzy in front of a large theater with Spider-Man scratching his head trying to figure out a movie they could watch.

"… self," Raven finished for the Hell of it.

"Let's see what movie would we both really like…"

"Look Spider-Man I'm trying to be nice here. But seriously, can't you get it through that little head of yours that-"

"You're having fun with me but you just won't admit it?"

"Ugh, whatever," Raven tried to reply but only groaned as she crossed her arms. It was shameful to admit it but the night as dreary as she has been acting and as reckless as Spider-Man has been acting, she was having fun.

"Cool!" Spider-Man jumped. "Wicked Scarier: Even more Wicked Scary than 'Wicked Scary'! Whoa I gotta watch tha-"

"NO!" Raven yelled out uncharacteristically drawing blank stares from Spider-Man and whoever else was in the area. Memories of the haunted house she created at Titans Tower from watching 'Wicked Scary' came soaring into her mind.

"Um, I take it you don't want to watch a horror movie?" Spider-Man whispered as he remembered that 'Timid' spirit so well. "It's okay Raven, we don't have to watch that if you're scared. We could just watch a chick flick."

Raven scowled as even though she secretly hated horror movies she even hated being treated like some baby even more.

"Okay I want two tickets to 'She's All That 2: She's even more than "All That"-"

"No," Raven interrupted as she stepped in between Spider-Man and the vendor, "Two tickets to Wicked Scarier."

"But Raven I thought-"

"Let's go." Raven grabbed the tickets and walked off. Spider-Man shrugged as he tossed a couple of bucks into the slot and slowly followed his tantrum loving 'date'.

"Too cute," He muttered as she walked off so angrily.

( - The Very Scary Movie! - )

Okay do you guys know that scene in a horror movie where they hot busty girl is running away from the killer half naked and you totally know she's a goner? Yes? No?

Well if ya do then this scene would be plenty recognizable and Spider-Man loved every minute of it. Seated comfortably in those theater seats he munched away on his popcorn and sipped away on his soda, his eyes growing larger in amusement.

Of course Raven was the opposite as she shrank into her chair holding back her timid self that was growing in strength. Spider-Man chuckled as his amusement didn't derive from the horror of the film. It was more like its comedy. Horrid acting and pathetic effects like the blood that could be mistaken for ketchup were its faults.

"Raven can you believe this-" Spidey paused his whispers as he felt something wrap around his arm. He paused as he slowly peered over to his right, totally Splinter Cell style.

And with a blink of his eyes to make sure he was seeing things correctly he confirmed that it was indeed Raven clinging onto his arm as she 'tried' to watch the film. Her subconscious emotions were slowly being pulled out and Spider-Man nodded in approval as he just turned to the screen, knowing how exhilarating it must be for Raven to let some of herself out of that shell.

Though from behind the theater sat a figure – a figure dressed in a large dark red trench coat, eyeing our two heroes' every move.

"Yo pops,"

"Yea?"

"Are you there?"

"… No, we're not here." Venom boiled on the other side of the line. "We're at Disneyland."

"Oh, cool. Ya kill Mickey yet?"

"Ugh, just give us a report."

"Report?" Obviously this was our always clueless Carnage in the trench coat. "Um, well they got this hot chick running around half-naked and this monster is chasing her. You should see it man. A lot of bouncing when she runs; ya know what I'm sayin'?"

"The report on our little spider and raven you freaking moron."

"Oh," Carnage finally understood. "You could've just asked."

". . ."

"Well dork boy and his gothy girlfriend are pretty close and cuddly right now. Almost too cute, didn't know Petey boy liked these kind of chicks." Carnage teased.

"We really could care less. Just stay quiet and hidden."

"Dude this is a bitch to sit here." Carnage whispered angrily. "I'm surprised the nerd-couple haven't left yet though because this movie sucks mucho ass. I can't take much more."

"You're not there to watch the movie sombrero boy. Just keep an eye on them. Once they leave, you follow got it?"

"Got it 'chief'," Carnage shut it off. He turned to look at our two budding lovebirds with those shady eyes. What he saw was totally breath taking… or at least to him anyway.

Because they were gone

Everyone was gone

Carnage frantically looked around and cursed himself.

"DAMMIT!"

He muttered angrily as he suddenly stopped to admire something on the screen. Apparently that girl who was supposed to die did indeed die. Carnage watched admiringly as he watched the bloody kill.

"Hmm, cheesy effects aside that was a pretty sweet kill." Carnage made a mental note. "I gotta try that sometime."

( - Outside, On Top A Building - )

"Boy, that movie really stunk eh?" Spider-Man groaned as he and Raven stood looking out to the city streets. The sorceress nodded silently in agreement as she looked out to the night sky noticing Titans Tower. She sighed as she sat down on a nearby crate.

"Uh Raven," Spidey mumbled, "Not having fun?"

"Huh?" Raven broke out from her thoughts and noticed that always blank stare from Spidey. "Oh no, I'm having fu-"

She caught herself mid sentence but Spider-Man already took it as a victory with his teasing whistles. Raven scowled again as she covered herself in her cape.

"Ugh, I think I had enough excitement for one night." Raven said. "I think I'm going-"

"This is really an awesome place isn't it?" Spidey interrupted gently to Raven's surprise. He turned to the view of the bay. "This place is so much cooler than where I come from. Oh yeah,"

Raven's eyes lit up.

It slowly began set in that neither she nor the Titans ever went into that deep of conversation when it came to Spider-Man's past. It was the same vice versa for that matter. Sure, the Titans got the gist that he didn't live the 'oh so fab' superhero lifestyle but the details were quite fuzzy. Raven just had to go deeper out of curiosity.

"Tell me," Raven reluctantly spoke, apparently struggling within her whether or not to delve into this. "How was it where you lived?"

Spider-Man looked up from his admiring gaze and snickered, "You sure you want to know?"

"Do I really have to ask twice?"

"Alrighty Rae, but don't say I didn't warn ya." Spider-Man got up and stretched as he looked at Jump City in a indifferent fashion. "My New York isn't as pleasant as it is here. But then again, I didn't live in the rich happenin' part of town, just some small house in suburbs with my aunt."

"Your aunt?" Raven asked reactively, "… You don't have parents?"

"Nope," Spider-Man answered with a pause. Raven totally related to Spider-Man's parentless past, she herself was given that same fate. Although anyone with a father like hers wouldn't mind being parentless. She bit her lip as the silence grew. Raven knew she had just pressed some buttons that shouldn't have been pressed.

She hurriedly changed subjects, "So, how was the city? Is it nice like the NYC we know?"

"Eh, I wouldn't say 'nice'," Spidey turned to her with a chin scratch. "Well I mean the NYC scenery is nice. But it's the people that live there that are a little bit questionable – thieves, criminals, drug lords… and-"

"Teenagers in spider tights?" Raven smirked.

"Hah, yeah that too." Spider-Man chuckled at the witty remark and sat down beside her. "But truthfully as bad as I'm making it sound? I really uh kinda miss it." he groaned, "Shucks, I think the homesickness is kicking in… yep… yes it is… eh… darn my luck."

Raven smiled at his silly antics only to let out a depleted breath staring at this somewhat somber Spider-Man. She, and the rest of the Titans for that matter, never actually got to see this semi-serious side of him before. Was he opening up to her knowingly? Raven began to believe so.

"Well, I understand how you feel." Raven related. "I get homesick too."

"… Really?" Spider-Man questioned, a bit surprised at Raven's openness - but even then not as surprised as Raven herself was.

"Um, I know I should just assume that you guys all had different homes before you formed the Titans but uh," Spider-Man smiled, "Would you mind telling me about your home?"

Raven paused as she heard his words. She wanted to stop the conversation but for some strange reason she felt as if she owed him something. Actually she knew exactly why. Being an empath Raven felt the anxiety Spider-Man was feeling when he spoke of his past. It was difficult for him… she felt she should at least try to open up as well… or at least partly.

"I uh, lived far away from here." Raven answered as she looked to the night sky. "It was beautiful. The people were peaceful and loving. No one ever fought, no one ever bickered. It was just… pleasant."

"Hmm, sounds like a great place."

"Yes," Raven frowned a bit. "It was.. a great place."

_It 'was'? _Spider-Man's eyes twitched as he knew he had just touched upon unpleasant memories.

"Raven I'm sorry, I shouldn't be nosing in like this." He slapped his head. "Dumb Spidey!"

"No," She grinned in a reassuring way. "It's only fair. I did do the same to you."

The two shared a pause that was of course broken in half by Spider-Man.

"Heh, well I guess we're just a pair of nosey people aren't we?"

Raven chuckled this time without hesitation. Spider-Man did too as he nodded in approval of her smiling. The laughter slowly faded and Raven just sighed as she looked at him.

"Don't worry about your home. Sooner or later Larry will be back and you'll be on your way back." Raven reassured him. Spider-Man took the comfort with a thumb up.

"Well now that Raven has spoken, I can sleep easy."

Raven suddenly smiled as this alien feeling of admiration radiated from within. She never had a crush on anyone before and hardly did she ever expect to fall for a boy like this.

"Hey, I'm going to ask you a question and be honest." Spider-Man spoke seriously making Raven pause in thought. "Uh, your emotions or your 'other' yous. Their thoughts and desires… is that really the way you feel?"

"What.. do you mean?" Raven stuttered.

"Well I mean all those emotions you hold inside were pretty whacky no offense." Spider-Man looked down as Raven huffed. "But anyway, they all really wanted to see what I looked like under the mask."

Raven didn't speak and Spider-Man just nodded, "Look, I don't do this for everyone but since I did invade your privacy and pretty much scar your mind for a lifetime-"

"No," Raven stated knowing where this was going. "You don't have to."

"I know that." Spider-Man chuckled. "But I want to."

"No, don't." Raven turned not wanting to force him to do this.

"Oh come on I know you're curious." Spider-Man teased. "For all you know I could be some ten eyed freak. Or a Nicholas Cage look-a-like! Come on, you know you want to see!"

Raven just stood silent as she turned reluctantly. Spider-Man nodded, letting out one last sigh before grabbing his mask. He took that neck piece and pulled the crimson façade off his face, exposing the face of Peter Parker. The sorceress froze as she glared at this boy in front of him.

Smooth pale skin, messy mask hair, a cute smile, and a pair of deep hazel eyes later Raven was officially speechless. Peter Parker sighed as he looked at her blank stare.

"You're disappointed aren't you?" He grinned. "Uglier than you thought I'd be?"

"No," Raven shook as she blushed. "… Not at all,"

Spidey smiled confidently. "Sweet,"

"But then again," Raven paused making Peter's heart stop. "I was sort of expecting some hairy skin freak with more than two eyes so,"

Spidey let out a sigh of relief.

"Funny," he laughed as he stared into Raven's amethyst orbs. "Well at least I know I'm not as ugly as 'that' right?"

"Right," Raven whispered as she felt those warm emotions overcome her again. She wouldn't admit it but this nerdy boy was just so cute. His face was so sincere and his charm was so likeable. She was now officially swept off her feet.

_Awkward, but nice, _was whatSpider-Man thought as he saw a small grin break across Raven's face. She quickly looked away from embarrassment and he just chuckled.

Making her happy was bringing him all sorts of joy. The first time he saw her he thought she was totally cute – of course in that gothic 'I don't conform to anything especially life' type of way. But learning about her struggles with emotions and seeing her finally release them were really bringing things to light. Spider-Man didn't know it fully but he was beginning to feel something there as well.

Mary Jane who?

Felicia what?

Raven slowly peered back as Spider-Man sighed, "So, what do we do now?"

"I.. guess.. we could just head back." Raven muttered as she stared at him again. The two were now inches away from each other and if you listened close enough you might have heard romantic violin music being played.

"Yea.. we could just head back." Spider-Man replied like a drone as Raven's eyes were just that hypnotizing. Yep, purple was a fun color to lose yourself in and Spidey was learning that on the fly for sure and with the attraction at its peak, this night was set to end in that story tale fashion.

The two closed their heavy eyes as they were about to experience their first kiss.

… But some people… no… some 'things' had other plans.

"Aw would you lookie here Cassidy?"

"Yea, it's Parker and Raven sitting on a tree!"

Spider-Man's eyes popped wide open as he heard the voices.

"K.I.S.S.I.N.G.!"

_Oh no, _Spider-Man thought as Raven too opened her eyes.

"First comes Carnage!"

"Then comes Venom!"

"Dang girl its cold, go put on some denims!"

Laughs from two familiar voices echoed and Spider-Man didn't want to believe it. "Please don't let it be them…" he quickly held Raven defensively as he looked around their surroundings. Raven stared at him as she felt a dark presence around them as well.

"What's… going on?" she asked.

"You, don't wanna know."

Suddenly two dark figures emerged from the shadows and chuckled making Spidey and Raven go back to back. The skinnier one of the two laughed in a more crazed fashion as he slowly came into the light.

"Aw what's the matter Petey? Can't recognize your two best pals?"

"… Cassidy?" Spider-Man glared at the teenage kid in front of him who was in a dark red trench coat and hat, dressed like one of those mafia members in those 'old school' gang movies. "… How did you get so young?"

"I eat my spinach." Carnage chuckled. "Brains can only take you so far Parker."

Spider-Man disregarded his new found youth because plainly he had other things about this 'kid' to worry about.

"Damn, I knew they were here." Spider-Man muttered to himself as Raven turned to him.

"I'm guessing you knowing this guy isn't a good thing?"

"No it isn't goth girl." The other one of the pair spoke now coming into view as well. "We're anything but good news. Isn't that right Peter?"

Spider-Man stood silent as he scowled at Brock who stepped out dressed in all black with a beanie, sweater and jeans that covered his muscular build. Cassidy chuckled at what was written on Eddie's shirt.

"Dude, nice sweatshirt,"

Eddie looked down towards his attire that read 'Death is a Bitch'. Below that of course was a picture of the grim reaper herself in half human and half skeletal form. He looked back and nodded with a smirk.

"Thanks." he turned his attention to our heroes. "Oh come on Parker bro, why do you look so surprised?"

"Yea," Cassidy closed the distance, "Did you think you could just warp a dimension and expect not to hear from us anymore?"

"Well it was wishful thinking." Spider-Man angrily replied as he and Raven stood their ground. The two symbiotes stalked our heroes as he encircled them.

"Heh heh heh, so Parker we see you've got a new girlfriend." Eddie snickered as he eyed Raven who stared angrily. "Purple hair eh?" he turned back to Spider-Man, "And we thought you had a thing for redheads."

Raven already knew that she was going to hate these two - whoever they were.

"Hmm, exotic hair color and gray skin, nice tastes Parker." Cassidy chuckled. "Actually Pops over here is starting to get a craving for girls with pink hair and gray skin. What a small world huh?"

Venom rolled his eyes as Spider-Man turned to Raven with a sigh, "I think we're going to need help."

"Oh you're gonna need more than just help." Venom growled.

"Yea nerd boy, you're going to need a miracle!" Carnage added as the two began that transformation that Spider-Man was all too familiar with. Pretty soon their masks were on with teeth and claws ready to shred as they let that ooze salivate from their jaws.

Raven grew a bit breathless as Venom and Carnage were at their epitome of grotesqueness. She slowly turned to Spidey with a blank and fearful stare.

"They're uh.. cute," she muttered cynically.

"Cute huh?" Carnage laughed insanely. "If you think we're cute now just wait till we're fed sweetie pie."

Spider-Man quickly put back on his mask while Raven's eyes glared white as the two were ready to defend themselves. And with simultaneous hisses from Venom and Carnage, so began the battle for Jump City...

Oh yes people,

Teen Titans vs. The Fearsome Five

Round one!

Ladies and Gentlemen…

Boys and Girls…

LET'S GET READY TO RUUUUUUMBLE!


	9. Bitchslap!

The hectic life of a true superhero…

Few people comprehend the stress and troubles that come along with having such great responsibilities. The constant crime fighting, the unending aches, the absolute "nothing" of a social life…

Indeed, just like the physical gifts one must have to be a hero or heroine, obviously this wasn't work for the weak minded. But surely even then, the strongest minded superheroes deserve a break!

"Oh yeah," Black Cat sighed lazily in her big comfy chair, sipping on a sweet strawberry smoothie. Those pout lips scrunched together cutely around that straw as she stretched her arms, closing her eyes in complete bliss.

"Now why the hell didn't I get a sidekick any sooner?"

Seated in an outdoor table to a local "Jamba Juice", Black Cat honestly seemed as if she didn't have a care in the world. Highly unusual for this cat-masked wearing vigilante obviously, but less work was one of the perks of having a sidekick. Well… if you could call this certain sidekick a "perk".

"Looks like this side of New York City is in _great_ hands," an almost robotic voice sounded. Black Cat's eyes immediately peered up as she shielded her vision from the sun, seeing two shadowy figures hovering via the power of high tech rocket boot boosters.

"Hey! If it isn't my favorite iron wearing man and _his_ sidekick," Black Cat smiled sweetly.

"Ugh seriously," the blackened armored of the two grumbled. "Why do I have to be known as your sidekick again? It totally hurts the ego."

"Well let's see," the orange one scratched his metal chin. "Get rid of that suit that _I _created and you can be whatever you want."

"Oh right…" the black armored man sighed and saluted. "Sidekick reporting for duty sir!" he turned to Black Cat. "Sorry but this suit is just way too damn sweet."

"I'm sure." Black Cat winked.

The two armored heroes descended with an ease of outlet power to their rocket boots, landing beside Black Cat, who was of course looking a bit too relaxed for their own tastes. Obviously, Iron Man and War Machine weren't big on lazy superheroes.

"So I hear the crime rate around these parts is sky high lately." Iron Man muttered staring at Black Cat's snug grin. "Now I can totally see why."

"Ugh, lighten up metal man, everything is under control." she pouted, noticing that War Machine was eying the other cups.

"Aw don't be shy big guy." Black Cat smirked towards War Machine. "Take as many as you want. My treat!"

"Really?" War Machine instantly grabbed two cups with his own hands and another pair with his "extra" hands that erupted out of the back of his suit. "Thanks!"

Black Cat giggled, "Sure better than motor oil yellow over here feeds you huh?"

"Oh yeah," War Machine indulged himself in fruity goodness. Iron Man groaned at his partner as he drank away shamelessly.

"I know you want some too Iron Boy." Black Cat playfully shoved a cup in his direction. "Come on, take it."

"No thanks," Iron Man replied sternly. "But you can tell me something Cat," his finger pointed. "Why in the world are you so relaxed? Don't you have crime to fight?"

"Sure I do," Black Cat nodded, "but my new partner's got it all covered for me right now. Ain't he a doll?"

"Your new partner?" Iron Man and War Machine immediately skewed, those metal faces almost seeming to make emotes of confusion.

"Yup," she sipped away and smiled, suddenly picking up some ruckus with her enhanced hearing. "And I think you both are about to meet him right… now."

"YAAAAH!" a scream rang loudly as the sound of windows shattering echoed throughout the block. Black Cat grinned brightly while Iron Man and War Machine stared stupidly.

"AAAH! Ms. Cat! Please help!" Larry scrambled with his cape flapping around while four metallic tentacles were on his tail crushing whatever was in sight. "Larry cannot run much longer!"

"Don't worry Larry! You're doing great." Black Cat cheered. "Just keep him busy and he'll tire out!"

"I dunno if I can-AAAH!" A swiping metal tentacle stopped Larry's plea as he ran by our three heroes sweating bullets. Iron Man and War Machine only scratched their confused little metallic heads, watching this 'heroic' tike being chased by the infamous Doctor Octopus.

"So this is the little Spider's replacement?" Doc Ock smirked behind those signature sunglasses, glancing over towards our trio of relaxing heroes, taking a break from his vintage 'robo tentacle' chase after Larry.

"He's only temporary." Black Cat scowled, "And I'll be joining in a minute Doc so you better watch out."

"Oh I'll be waiting in anticipation my dear." The eight limbed fiend chuckled. "I always love to mingle with the finer women I meet." Cat just twitched as Otto clanked his way after Larry who understandably was running like a mad man.

"This is just cruel." Iron Man commented.

"Yea well that kid deserves it." Black Cat pouted as she crossed her arms. "He sent _my_ Spider to another dimension."

"Uh Spider-Man's in another dimension huh?" War Machine smirked. "Pretty trippy."

"I… agree." Iron Man added blankly with most of his attention on Doc Ock, who had just hurled a truck to get to our cowering Larry. "Uh look Cat, you may have a vendetta against this kid but I can't just sit and watch this."

"Ugh, don't worry he's doing fine." Black Cat lied to herself.

"Sorry old friend but we're stopping this." Iron Man was determined as he gently brushed Black Cat away and prepared to take off only to be stopped by War Machine's hand.

"Wait a sec," WM scowled. "Aren't you going to say one of your lame signature super hero sayings before we do this?"

Iron Man scratched his chin quickly perking up as he found his words. He lifted his hand in the air and shook it with purpose. "SUPERIOR TACTICS!"

"Now there we go." And with that the two metallic one man militias took off to save Larry from being torn limb from limb. Black Cat just rolled her eyes as she sat back angrily in her seat, her mind drifting off.

"Damn you Spider." she growled to herself. "You're probably having the time of your life not being around these parts… wherever you are…"

Huh… um do you want to break the bad news to her? Or should I?

( - Jump City - )

Spider-Man had a bunch of opinions on how things were going right now but 'having the time of his life' definitely wasn't one of them. 'This totally sucks' would be a much more accurate verbal painting of the situation. How would you feel if you've been hurled about a hundred feet and slammed into a brick wall?

"Ow…" Spidey's mope came late his body splattered against the bricks. With a groan he slowly peeled himself off the wall, doing a good impression of a Looney Toon gag as he fell gently on his rear.

"Heads up Parker!" Spidey opened his eyes, those white mask beads instantly doubling in size as apparently his vision was capable enough to see a lashing tendril with had just purchased a one way ticket towards his head.

"Whoa!" Spider-Man desperately rolled away, fumbling to his feet, watching the tendril drive through the wall like a spear. The black tentacle wriggled around a bit and quickly recoiled, pulling away chunks of the building as it did.

"Now that's better," Venom clapped pleasingly at the damaged wall. "We definitely think this "Jump" City needs some redecorating."

"Ugh, what the heck is this to you Brock?" Spidey flared. "Symbiote Eye for the Sane Guy?"

"Oh lighten up," Venom sighed. "What'd you think? Just because you got some new friends in another dimension things were going to be different?"

"Well actually things are different!" Spidey pointed to bring an abrupt pause to Venom's laughing. "My spider tights in this dimension are way way cooler."

Cue another abrupt pause. "Uh not that we care, but come again?"

Spidey smiled, "It's got tons of features! And check this Venom! It doesn't even ride up in the crot-"

"Okay! We get the picture!" Venom interrupted only to turn away for a bit. "But you know… we'd think you'd be a bit more worried… our offspring must be having a great time with your girlfriend."

"Oh I think Carnage should be the worried one." Spider-Man replied with a false-sense of confidence as even he knew Carnage was big trouble, even for a powerful mystic like Raven.

"Believe what you wanna believe but our time is done." Venom's teeth were as gruesome as ever. "We've got other people to meet ya know, namely your other Titan pals."

"No way Brock, your fight's with me." Spider-Man stood angrily ready to take down his arch nemesis.

"Meh, stop being so selfish." Venom said. "Besides we're not leaving you high and dry. We've actually made some new friends too and they're just dying to meet you!"

"Uh riiiiight," Spider-Man smiled mockingly. "Come on Brock-o, you know and I know that you don't have any friends."

"Heh, oh we know that." Venom paused only to point. "But we guess someone forgot to give _them_ that memo."

It was then Spider-Man's senses tingled. A thrust out of instinct sent him upwards, adhering to a nearby building. Instantly an explosion rocked the street below him as he shielded his face, staring into the smoke from what seemed only as an electric discharge. The remaining startled crowd dispersed into a frantic frenzy.

"What the heck?" Spidey gagged at the smoke. His eyes fought to see and three dark silhouettes were his spoils of victory.

"Nice costume bug boy." a babyish voice mocked. "Did you ask your mommy to make it all colorful for you?"

"Yea… red, white, and blue." a raspier voice chuckled. "Hey let's make him like a flag and hang him."

"Oh yea," the feminine voice now giggled. "Now there's an idea."

"Yea," Spider-Man gulped. "A **_bad_** idea."

"Meh, sounds good to us… oh by the way… meet Gizmo, Mammoth, and Jinx." Venom celebrated, "They're really good people once you get to know them."

"Oh?" Spider-Man muttered, "I can totally see it."

Venom turned as if he had sensed a new presence closing in nearby. "Darn, sorry to leave ya like this Pete but it looks like you're going to be a bit busy anyway." He spun to his three teammates with a snug and ugly grin. "Don't be too harsh on him… that's our job."

"Got it," The three replied simultaneously and with a snicker Venom leapt out into the darkness.

"I really and I mean **_really_** hate that guy." Spider-Man grumbled as he watched Venom web sling off, now keeping his eyes on our favorite trio of teenage baddies. The masked crusader leapt down from the wall, standing silent in wait for his enemies to make a move.

"Hah," Gizmo scoffed. "And those two sharp toothed cludge bumpers said you had a big mouth."

"Yea, what's the matter? Jinx's look was so suggestive. "Cat's got your tongue?"

Mammoth egged on. "Heh, maybe he's just too scared to even say a word. Chicken!"

"I have a big mouth?" Spider-Man shrugged. "Now what would make them say something like that?"

Like a flash of lightning from the sky Spider-Man quickly leapt into action, as usual catching his foes completely off guard. "What the-" A webline mid flip quickly tied up Mammoth a bit as he rolled and landed behind Gizmo.

"I got one word baldy," he patted the little guy on the head as he turned. "Rogaine!"

"HEY!" A sharp blade erupted out of Gizmo's backpack as attempted to impale Spider-Man for attacking something oh so personal as his "receded" hair line. The steel blade glared but Spidey swiftly dodged, spinning and kicking the weapon away sending Gizmo sprawling with that signature "Waaaah!". A baseball slide later and Mammoth was now the clueless one.

"Two words for you big guy," he jumped on Mammoth's shoulders flapping his hands in front of his nose as if 'rancid' was a nice way to describe the stench. "Ugh, Right Guard…"

"Why you little-" Mammoth growled, flailing his hands to grab Spider-Man in a crush but was countered swiftly by a forward flip, smashing his boot into the metahuman's face as he landed. Mammoth grabbed at his noggin mumbling swears, Spidey now being in front of Jinx.

"Whoa looks like someone got in a fight with a hair dryer." Spider-Man scratched his head. "Let me guess… the hair dryer won?"

Jinx scowled as she touched her precious 'do', "Oh now that's crossing the line."

Spider-Man suddenly felt his spider sense go off again and back flipped. When nothing happened of course he grew curious. He slowly glanced up to see two pink glowing eyes that if anything looked more 'Whoa that's neat' than 'Holy crap I better do something'.

Spider-Man admired. "Wait a sec... pink hair? Hey! You're that girl Carnage told me about! I hear Venom has a… er… crush on you?"

"He sure does." Jinx smiled like the cute girl she was.

"Well aren't you just a lucky girl." Spider-Man smirked with no envy at all.

"Yeah," she sighed dreamily with heart eyes making Spidey roll his eyes. "But speaking of luck, I really should be wishing you _luck_ on your fall."

"Wait… my fall?" Spider-Man raised a brow only to notice the ground around him creaking around him. Our arachnoid sighed as had just been officially 'jinxed'.

"Darn," And with that the street below him collapsed, forming a canyon leading into a dim plummet into the Jump City sewers. Not your ideal dip in the pool folks…

--

_What is this thing? _Raven's eyes thinned in concentration as she used her telekinetic shield to bat away a barrage of soaring pseudopodia blades. There were basically two types of villains the Titans were familiar with: ones that were either totally silly like that crazed British tyrant Mad Mod or ones that were totally uber frightening to face such as the now deceased cerebral genius Slade.

This "Carnage" seemed to be both. And we all know he can be both.

"Come on sing it with me folks! Carnage in the morning! Carnage in the evening! Carnage at supper time! When your mind is freakin' unstable? You can have Carnage anytime!"

That burst of melodic music cued another batch of those spinning blades sending civilians running away like a bunch of crazed baboons.

"Leave these people alone." Raven commanded as she shielded a group of innocents with a manifested magic dome. Carnage frowned at the sight of her protective blanket of black energy.

"Oh come on sunshine, being decapitated isn't all that bad." Carnage grinned evilly. "In fact I haven't had one complaint from anyone I've done it to."

"Right," Raven scowled. "But I wasn't talking about your little blades. I was talking about your singing." She rolled her eyes. "This isn't an American Idol blooper reel."

"American Idol bloopers? Ouch," Carnage frowned teasingly as he clutched his chest. "That hurt. That really did."

"Not as much as this." Raven didn't give Carnage time to answer as she followed with a telekinetic blast that Carnage barely evaded by spinning away. The energy shattered some windows behind, Carnage curiously taking a peak back.

"Cool." He slowly turned eyeing Raven so harshly, those alien eyes piercing sharp like the daggers his tendrils were forming. "No wonder Parker wanted to go boom boom with you. You're hot and you can blow up shit! Score!"

Raven only stood silent as her eyes were as white as the insides of an Oreo cookie.

Carnage's eyes stared. "You know," his claw pointed. "There's something about you that our little alien pal can't resist. It can't be that gothic get up, which by the way I think you need to reconsider your options."

She stared at the black and red goop Carnage called a costume. "You're giving me fashion advice?"

"Yep you definitely need to loose that cloak." Carnage shuttered, his memories of 'cloaked' beings full of contempt. "It covers the goods babe and may I say that leotard does fit quite nice. Rawr."

"Ugh, you're disgusting." Raven covered herself a bit with that blue cape.

"I know! Ain't being a teenager awesome?"

Raven growled as she stood her ground also feeling 'something' about Carnage that she couldn't exactly put her finger on. Being empathic let her see the energies flowing from this bit of ugly and the aura surrounding Carnage confused her. Not only was his vibe totally disturbing bordering between lunacy and psychosis but it almost felt like there was two "persons". As if she was reading two different emotional states.

"Oh well," Carnage shrugged as he began to rub his claws together. "I think I'll get over it when we 'really' start to play and besides, I'll find out sooner or later. Your brain is going to be so tasty and intellectually stimulating!"

"Shut up." Raven replied behind the confines of her hood. "I'm not afraid of you."

"Afraid?" Carnage mocked. "I'm not here to scare people babe. I'm here to make sure they don't ever feel fear again. It's kinda hard to be scared when you're dead!"

Suddenly a hoard of symbiote tendrils came lashing out at Raven, soaring with a thirst for some blood. Acting out of natural instinct, she phased into the ground and reappeared adjacent to Carnage from behind.

"Azarath, Metrion-" a spinning swipe of a blade stopped the chant as Raven began to weave and backpedal, Carnage already going into 'swing at anything as fast as you can' mode. Raven blinked as she levitated away from the relentless swiping a bit startled how quickly this red killer reacted.

"Well aren't we the cutest magician ever to grace the planet," Carnage chuckled as he recoiled his tendril that twirled like a sword. "Sorry but that magic trick BS isn't going to work on me. I'm a magician myself ya know."

"Oh really?" Raven smirked. "Then I guess the trick's on me."

"Hah! It sure is you little-"

**BOOOM!**

Carnage couldn't even finish his remark as an obsidian glowing bus came smashing into him, driving him way across the street and into an abandoned building. The vehicle was obliterated on impact creating an explosion of glass and metal with Carnage taking the worst of it.

"How's that for a trick?" Raven smirked to herself as she made her way to the pile of rubble. A few bystanders cheered on as she slowly floated over to the mass of shattered glass and concrete, tossing away the rummage to wrap up this maniac and call it a night. But as we all know, Carnage wasn't some pencil necked geek. No way. This guy could take as much as he dished out.

A loud explosion of broken concrete was followed by coiling tendrils that quickly sent Raven stumbling back on her rear end.

"Whoa," Carnage cracked his neck and other dislocated parts, the noises of bones being pushed back into their sockets just sickening. He eyed Raven who was now a bit more worried than before. "I think that fixed the kink in my neck."

"No way." Raven couldn't believe it as Carnage didn't even have scratch on him.

"Anything's possible when your mind is crazy enough to think it. Imagination is fun!" He laughed. "Oh by the way survey says? You gotta big problem goth girl."

Carnage's psychopathic cackles which would send chills up most people's spines hit a bit more home with Raven. She now truly began to realize what she was up against.

"Dammit," she slowly backed off looking to her brooch which was still shining from her distress call to Titans Tower. "Where are you guys?"

--

"_Cyborg," _Robin's voice distorted into Cyborg's ears from the T-Car's onboard radio system. _"We're closing in on Raven and Spider-Man's position. See anything yet?"_

Cy looked around carefully – well as carefully as a madman shredding down the streets at ludicrous speeds could anyway. "Nah man, nothing yet." He answered. "But we should be seeing something soon though."

"_Yea, just keep your eyes open, I'm right behind you."_

"I hear ya loud and clear." Cyborg nodded as he made a quick left turn, burning rubber as he skidded a bit. "Don't worry I got everything-"

**CRAAAAAAAAAASH!**

"Covered" would have been the word said if Cyborg didn't just get totally derailed from a collision that immediately sent panic throughout the entire block. The T-car's right side windows shattered instantly and the metal alloy that made up the body was ripped up on contact.

The T-Car continued to skid as its collision partner with eighteen wheels shoved it down the street sending sparks spraying everywhere, finally stopping with another loud crash. Yep, you can chalk up another building with a gigantic hole in it folks because the T-Car was now officially a wrecking ball.

With a rev of the truck engine all commotion stopped as the building wall was breeched, bricks and concrete falling upon a now totally demolished T-Car. Those hi tech automatic opening doors were no more and countless holes with circuitry spraying out sparks was all that was left. This was Cyborg's worst nightmare… yes… worse than those "egg people" ones.

"Oops, looks like we've just gimped your ride."

The one responsible exited his stolen semi truck turned battering ram. Two pseudo white eyes were covered by "cool" shades as Venom lashed his tongue to the air, inspecting the once most pimpin' ride Jump City had ever seen – which was now about as useful as busted scrap metal.

"Aw, did we do that?" Venom teased to himself as he tossed his Trucker shades off. Suddenly that black symbiote masked pulled away and turned to Eddie. "Oh yes we did."

"We are one mad mother trucker." The two bonded partners had their laugh as they saw a bionic arm shoot out of the rubble, following a loud groan. That black ooze wrapped up Eddie's face as, Venom slowly walked over with that hideous smile stretching to its limits. Cyborg stared up weakly with his red eye flashing a bit to see a face that would be one of the worst last images one could have.

"Oh look, something we can toss in the recycling bin." A few tendrils appeared from Venom's back as he moved in for a finishing blow.

"CYBORG!" Robin yelled.

Venom grumbled as he turned to see the R-Cycle driving right towards him. He quickly leapt up to a nearby wall and shattered a window, slipping inside just before a few bird-a-rangs were sent his way.

"Friends!" Starfire yelled concerned as she and BB (An eagle) quickly soared downward to meet Robin who was now helping Cyborg out of his wrecked car.

"Are you alright?" Starfire frowned.

"Yea Cy," BB quickly put three fingers up. "How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Uh six?"

BB sighed. "He's not alright."

"He'll be fine." Robin retorted.

"Oh man," Cyborg groaned as he clutched his metal head. "Was I run over by a truck?"

"Yeah," Robin scowled as he glanced at the black semi behind them. "You were."

"Dudes, did you see what was driving that thing?" Beast Boy took note of the shattered glass. "What the heck was that?"

"Yeah, I caught a glimpse of it." Robin nodded. "It's inside the building… whatever it is."

"Oh no," Cyborg slowly glared down at his car realizing the true horror of what just happened. He quickly disregarded his pains and aches as his blue led panels suddenly turned red, steam shooting from that nose.

"Uh Cy calm down." Robin pleaded.

"HELL NO!" that red LED eye glowed. "NO ONE MESSES WITH MY BABY! WHERE IS THIS PUNK!"

"We didn't know household appliances could be so loud." The warped voice hissed from the dark hole the T-car created. "Oh and about your car? We think you'd better get it rebuffed… it looks horrible."

Cyborg fumed. "Oh you're going to be sorry! You hear me!"

"Oh we're soooo scared, we're being threatened by a walking trash can."

With a growl, Cyborg didn't even listen to Robin's plea to not rush in as he just ran into the building, flipping on his shoulder flashlight. The rest of the Titans followed swiftly, Starfire using her green energy to help illuminate. The four heroes walked into the dark room with a bit of paranoia every little 'bump' and 'clank' making them a bit more uneasy.

"All that talk and you won't even show your face?" Cyborg scowled.

"Oh trust us," Venom's voice echoed throughout the dark warehouse. "You'll be seeing our face way more than you'd ever want to at first glance."

"Cyborg, scan the room." Robin commanded as he took out his own flashlight and looked around. BB finally followed his teammates and morphed into a firefly, their little area being illuminated in the darkness.

"This can't be right." Cy skewed. "I'm not picking up anything on my radar."

"What?" Robin looked at him strangely knowing very well of Cyborg's abilities to detect anything, using sonic readings, thermal readings, and everything in between to do so.

"Aw, are all your cruddy parts malfunctioning?" Venom teased. "We'll gladly take you to the scrap heap."

Suddenly Robin flinched as his flashlight was pulled away from him. A crack later and the tool came tumbling back at the Boy Wonder in scrapped pieces. BB quickly yelped as he turned back into his normal form not wanting to suffer the same fate the flashlight did.

"Uh, should we be worried?" Beast Boy turned to his teammates with a bite of his lip.

"Aaaaiiiieeee!" Starfire screamed as she backpedaled into something, turning to stare into two white eyes. Suddenly a web bolt muffled Starfire, making her reel back, attempting to rip it off.

"You have one annoying scream little girl." Venom moped as Starfire attempted to fire a starbolt towards him only to find nothing there. She angrily ripped the webbing off and meeped as the pain was like a band-aid being pulled off a bit too quickly.

She stared at the webbing in her hands the other Titans looking on confused. "This cannot be… Spider-Man is the one responsible for this? Our friend?"

"Sorry pretty eyes but don't even insult us with that comparison." Suddenly BB felt a tap on his shoulder quickly turning to meet that face as well.

"Oh my God!" BB yelped as his throat was grasped.

"No..." Venom smirked. "But you're getting closer!"

"AAH!" BB yelled as he was sent soaring across the building, being driven into some crates. The green changeling hit the floor harshly as Cyborg attempted to fire his sonic cannon only to see Venom slip away again.

"BB!" Cy scowled. "Damn, what is this thing?" the half-droid pulled his weapon back going to take off after his green friend.

"Cyborg stand down," Robin held his shoulder. "Stick together."

The remaining trio reluctantly formed a circle, worryingly looking around.

"So all of you chumps are the "oh so famous" Teen Titans." Venom sighed. "This is really disappointing. Consider us officially bummed out."

"Show yourself." Robin stated as he withdrew his bo-staff only to be laughed at.

"Oh calm down, we just want to introduce ourselves… we were pretty infamous back in our area as well… the name's Venom."

"Venom?" Cyborg laughed. "Tough name for a guy that hides from a real fight."

"We… us…"Starfire went a little tweaked in the face, "Friends did we not only see one being that has done the mean things? Or was there two?"

"Yea…" Cyborg squinted. "What the heck is up with the "we" and "us" stuff?"

"Well, you ever heard of the saying 'two heads are better than one?'"

"Yea." Cyborg said with a gulp.

Suddenly screeches could be heard from everywhere as a dozen of symbiotic snakes erupted from the darkness surrounding our Titans, hissing with green saliva dripping from their serrated jaws. "As you can see… we've got way more than two."

"This is quite… disturbing." Starfire muttered as Robin and Cy tightened the circle.

Robin spun his staff around as he scowled. "This thing moves just like Spider-Man."

"Yea only a lot uglier." Cy added as his sonic cannon formed.

"I assume friend Spider-Man wasn't the only one who made the dimensional leap." Starfire's eyes lit up green.

"Well let's give him a warm welcome then… TITANS GO!"

"Yay! Dinner time!"

--

"Whoa!" A big fist with the size and solidity of an anvil barely missed Spidey's noggin as he leaned back, doing one of those amazing balancing acts one could only see from him. The first strike was dodged yes only to see another one of Mammoth's fist soaring towards him soon after, the fist slamming into a hot dog stand.

Spidey sighed as he landed upon a car in a seated position. "Look can we stop with the vandalizing and just get you to hit me?"

A double ax handle was his reply and after Spidey bailed the force instantly shattered the car, making it as flat as a flap jack.

Spidey sighed again. "Guess not." He quickly webbed onto a light post and pulled himself away from Mammoth's reach. He perched against the post to gather up a plan but instantly his safe haven began to shake loose from the ground itself.

"Ah, lemme guess." he turned. "Pinky strikes again?"

"Wow, your good," Jinx mocked as she cartwheeled her way over to the light post she hexed. Spidey wasn't going to be outclassed this time and he took to the air again quickly slipping between Jinx and Mammoth.

"HEY!" the two H.I.V.E. agents yelped as they received a glob full of webbing, enwrapping them both together tightly.

"Aw now ain't this a Kodac moment?" Spider-Man laughed at their struggles, Jinx yelping at Mammoth's harsh attempts to free the two. He quickly whipped out a camera from his back pocket.

"Say cheese!"

**FLASH!**

And cue those swirly eyes.

"Hah! You call that a Kodac moment?"

_Oh yeah… there were three…_

"Your pit sniffin' butt being kicked sounds like a way better picture to me!" A rocket with a boxing glove attached to it quickly homed in on our arachnoid, only to be batted away with a kick.

"Sorry baldy, but that's only one opinion." Spidey smirked, Gizmo only shrugging.

"Only one huh?" a button press later and it was going to be a potty mouth party as at least a couple dozen of Gizmo's surrounded Spider-Man via his hologram gadget.

"Okay, you made your point." Spidey sweat dropped.

"You can't hit me! You can't hit me!" all of those Gizmo's mocked repeatedly as they flew around in circles makin' Spidey a bit dizzy.

"I can't hit you?" Spidey clutched his head a bit and closed his eyes. His spider sense never lied and he quickly shot a webline towards the one true Gizmo making the little kid gasp as his backpack was now fish lined.

"Gotcha!"

"Ah slag it!" Gizmo grumbled as he attempted to fly away only to be slowly reeled in inch by inch. Suddenly a mischievous grin manifested in his face, a lever quickly shot out of Gizmo's backpack and his finger prepared to press it.

"Oh no," Spidey widened his glare.

"Oh yeah," with a press his rocket jets suddenly went "Fast and the Furious" style, sending Gizmo and Spidey soaring off like a speeding bullet.

Look to the sky! It's a bird!

No! It's a plane!

No! It's a Mecha Midget!

"WHOOOOOA!" Spidey's eyes went back in his sockets as he held on for dear life, Gizmo taking him on a wild ride across the Jump City skyline. The boy genius twirled and spun as he juked his way around, sending Spidey scraping across the walls, billboards... yea you know that Pepsi sign? Well now it was just Pep! And who the hell wants Pep!

"Hope you had a nice ride cause your stop's here."

"Huh?" Spider-Man turned to see yet another brick wall he was about to become close friends with. "This is so going to hurt…"

**SPLAT!**

--

A grunt later and Raven came barreling from out of an alleyway, tumbling to a stop. She coughed a bit as she rubbed her head from the wicked backhand she just received.

"I'm having such a great time and you're already down? Tsk tsk tsk," Carnage sighed as one of his hands morphed into a tendril, elongating until it was about the size of a jump rope. "You're no fun."

He began to jump rope in a mocking fashion. "Look what you've made me resort to. This is just inhumane!"

Raven only scowled as she found the strength to pull herself back up, her bruises and cuts being blocked out of her mind like she did to Beast Boy's jokes. She had just been thrashed around for the past few minutes, Carnage not seeming to be hurt at all.

"I'm not done yet." She spat as she sprayed her own blades of dark magic towards Carnage. The symbiote swirled as he easily dodged it with that super human agility and launched a few of his own blades back, Raven narrowly escaping that with a leap to the side, a part of her cloak being shredded by one of those knives.

"Dang, remind me to pay for that." Carnage chuckled as his jump rope disappeared. "That looked expensive!"

"Shut up!" she suddenly soared towards Carnage with eyes blazed, tackling the symbiote to the ground, using a tendril of black energy to choke him.

"Whoa, rough." Carnage muffled as he gleed under Raven's grip. "Come on tell me that you aren't enjoying this."

"I don't know what or who you are but this fight is over." Raven's eyes glowed as her other free hand reeled back to blast Carnage straight to hell.

"Agh, if you say so." A flurry of tendrils suddenly enwrapped Raven around her neck to return the favor, her arms and legs soon following suit. The choking had now swung over to Cassidy's favor, Raven gagging for air as those tendrils tightened.

"Now aren't we a cute little super hero?" Carnage teased as he pulled Raven closer, that ugly face looking so snug. "You've been so fun to play with! I is so sad to see it end!"

"This isn't over." Raven growled as she fought for air.

"Oh come on, not this valiant super hero talk." Carnage moped. "Can I have some orange juice with this BS?"

"Are all of Spider-Man's enemies as irritating as you are?" Raven coughed as she squirmed in the tendrils.

"No, but are all of you heroes in this little world as bitchy as you are?" Carnage mocked back with that laugh that could shatter glass. "I just wanted to play dammit!"

"Y-you… just wanted to play?" Raven's purple eyes began to glow red.

"Duh! That's what I've been…" Carnage tightened his grip, but suddenly skewed as his symbiote was shivering a bit. "… saying?"

"Well then," two new eyes sprouted and her teeth became sharp, that voice becoming demonic. "Let's play…"

"Um, can I withdraw my offer?" Carnage chuckled nervously as a blanket of darkness engulfed him. "Ah crap!"

--

"I got him!"

"I do too!"

"I have him as well!"

"Dudes, let's take him out!"

All four Titans were now totally in sync, beating down upon their enemy with that signature Titan way. Yes kids, Venom was going to be screaming for mercy by the time all of these kids were done. The smoke was stirring, that anime cloud was growing, and the sounds of struggling rang loudly.

With the ferocity of werewolves the Titans were giving Venom what he deserved!

… Now if only they could actually get him inside the scuffle.

"Uh… right," the obsidian symbiote sweatdropped as he stared at the Titans wail away on another in the darkness, that cloud of struggling staying strong.

"OW!"

"HEY WATCH IT!"

"BOOYAH I THINK I GOT HIM!"

"FRIENDS I THINK I HAVE HIS HEAD!"

"DUDE! STARFIRE THAT'S ME!"

Venom just rolled his eyes in disbelief. "Ahem."

Slowly the cloud deformed and a frozen picture of the Titans at each other's throats made Venom chuckle. "Uh do you Titans always act this stupid or are you just trying to entertain us?"

The four Titans deflated as they quickly shot back into Teen Titan ass kicking position with Robin at the head.

"I don't care who you think you are but-"

"You're a dead man got that?" Cyborg finished for Robin as he fumed over his debunked T-Car.

"Yea dude, no one messes with the T-Car." Beast Boy crossed his arms. "And my hair-do while we're at it."

Venom chuckled at BB. "Sorry Shrek Jr. but can the adults talk here?"

"Shrek Jr.?"

"Yep, besides, we don't want anything to do with you." Venom crossed his arms. "We're in this for dinner and word on the street is? You don't even have a brain."

"Hey! I do too have a brain!" Beast Boy scowled. "Right Cy?"

"Y-yea…" Cyborg shrugged to make BB quickly sigh.

"We have heard enough of your mean speaking!" Starfire scowled. "I will not let you hurt my friends any longer!"

"Aw no way!" Venom batted his pseudo eyes. "You Titans have your very own Power Puff Girl? We're jealous!"

"Okay enough of your talkin' ugly!" Cyborg growled as his cannon formed quickly. "My cannon gots some noise to make to."

BLAST! The beam came quickly Venom ducking, the beam skimming his head.

"GAH!" Venom screamed in pain as his black suit recoiled instantly, the sonic wave stinging his symbiote. "Dammit… that's a sonic beam…" he growled, realizing the potential danger.

"Booyah!" Cyborg celebrated.

"Time to kick bad guy butt dudes!"

"Right," Robin nodded. "Titans… go!"

"No… Titans blow!" Venom smirked mockingly as he leapt into the air and hung against the wall. A few bird-a-rangs quickly made him scurry off a bit in a crawl, landing him on a scaffold only to be met with an emerald raptor.

"Whoa Jurassic Park! Cool!" Venom chuckled. "Ya know dinosaurs are extinct for a reason right green?"

Beast Boy growled in that prehistoric way, leaping forward with talons extended attempting to take out Venom in one swoop. His momentum like his sometimes quirky sense of humor suddenly became his downfall as he was monkey flipped across the building like a rag doll.

"YAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"Have a nice flight!" Venom waved at the flying green imp as suddenly Cyborg was now his new tango partner.

"Man you are so toast." Cy cocked his cannon back to fire. Venom gulped a bit attempting to think his way out of this… that grin spread from ear to ear again.

"Come on bro, you wouldn't hit a guy with glasses now would you?" a pair of bifocals magically formed upon his ugly face.

"Hey wait a sec… how did you-BLAH!" Cy suddenly was entangled in tendrils, his canon being webbed up a bit. He turned to see those glasses dangling in front of his eyes.

"Now you see them?" Venom tossed the glasses up and rammed his fist into Cyborg's face, driving the glasses into him simultaneously in a crack. "Now ya don't."

Cy fell to the ground from up high and landed harshly on the floor. "Booyah that bitch!"

Venom's celebration was short lived as Starfire grabbed Robin and sent them both soaring to the ceiling.

"Stop hurting my friends!" Starfire yelled as she sent Robin spinning towards Venom like a discus. The symbiote was taken by surprise as in no time Robin was kicking and swinging his staff as nimble as can be. A block and a parry took care of his that boot, but that metal staff was another story and it ended unhappily right across Venom's face.

"Ow!" the symbiote backed away a bit. "Dude that hurt!"

"That's the idea," Robin didn't stop as he used that kung-fu powah to start battering away at Venom's defenses driving the symbiote back. The Boy Wonder got a good kick to the face and attempted to follow by ramming his staff into Venom's gut but a few tendrils put that plan to rest.

A clawed hand to the throat suddenly lifted Robin off his feet.

"You think you're so damn cool with that Tae Boe crap don't you?" Venom hissed. "Well we're not impressed." a whiplash of tendril suddenly sent Robin spinning towards a wall.

"Robin!" Starfire attempted to fly over to him but was stopped via a webline, the alien wrapped around like a spider's meal. Venom slowly yanked her over to him, Starfire squirming to free herself.

"Hey there cutie," Venom smirked in her face. "Did we just kick your boy friend's ass? We're sorry."

"You… you are a bad man!" Starfire scowled as she stuck her long tongue out to mock him. Venom snickered.

"Oh tell us something we don't know, and wow! Nice tongue!" Venom opened those fanged teeth as his tongue quickly snaked out and playfully poked at Starfire's head making her go white. "Check ours out!"

"Meep." She whispered under her breath as she watched the slime drip from that muscle.

"Ain't it sweet?" Venom teased. "Your brains are going to be tasty!"

Starfire suddenly growled as her eyes turned green, quickly shredding that webbing around her into nothing as she reared back and walloped Venom to the next century, his body hitting the ground in a violent skid. She didn't let up as she began to rain down starbolts and burying Venom into the ground.

Starfire stared harshly at the crater she created as she was met with some claps.

"Wait to go Starfire! You go girl!" Cyborg yelled from below as the other Titans slowly got up rubbing their aches with a bit of victory.

"Dude you showed him how it's done Star." BB gave a thumbs up. "You dropped him like a bad habit."

"Yea, good work Starfire." Robin smiled as she lowered herself down to her teammates and giggled, clapping her hands. The Titans slowly strolled over to the rubble and began to pull the rocks away to retrieve Venom.

Starfire got a tap on her shoulder. "Need a hand?"

"Yes I-" she turned to see those white crevassed filled eyes and teeth. Suddenly all the Titans found themselves being entangled by black pseudopodia, dangling like strangled puppets.

"Did you really think we'd end the party like that?" Venom hissed as his teeth drooled emerald saliva. "A party with Venom is an all nighter baby… OW!"

--

And now we join in on a butt kicking that all shall remember! Well the exception would be Carnage of course. This type of head trauma would usually lead to a bit of memory loss.

Oh yeah, Raven was getting hers. She was definitely getting hers.

"OW!" Carnage's noggin was driven through a building, his head mounted upon the wall like a stuffed animal. Some kids just stared at that symbiote face, turning white and scattering off in wild screams. Before Cassidy could even react he was violently yanked out and spiked into the ground like a nail, his body protruding out of the asphalt.

The black coiling tendril that had been thrashing Carange came back to its owner, those four red eyes glistening in the darkness. "Heh heh heh now you are a fun one."

Carnage slowly yanked his head out of that street and spat out chunks of tar. "People smoke this stuff?" He made a disgusted face as he turned to Raven, officially having the snot beat out of him. He stared at those demonic red slits for eyes and gulped a bit.

"Okay, so is this the part where your head is supposed to spin around?" Carnage cracked as he rubbed his poor little melon.

"Heh heh heh, you're cute." Raven suddenly phased behind him and a tendril coiled out and constricted with ease. "I can totally feel that thirst for blood you have… I'm impressed."

"Y-you are?" Carnage smiled gleefully as he felt a hand petting his head.

"Yes, finally I meet a man who'd enjoy a few decapitations to go with a romantic evening." Raven hissed as she stroked Carnage's head.

"Uh… same here." Carnage skewed a bit as his eyes turned to hearts, purring at this stroking only to gag as the tendrils suddenly tightened to where he couldn't breathe.

"Too bad I'm not one for romance." Raven laughed evilly into his ear. "Playtime's over and I think someone needs to have some quality time with Daddy."

"Daddy?" Carnage's eyes opened to see a gray palm pressed against his nose. A black swirling ball formed and suddenly the energy exploded straight into his face, sending Carnage barreling across the ground like a bowling ball.

Crashing into numerous things such as cars, mailboxes, and even mailmen he landed in a lifeless heap on the floor, his body as motionless as a broken statue. Raven slowly floated over with that demonic grin on her face as a tendril swiftly wrapped around Carnage and pulled him up.

"No pulse." Raven sighed as she stared at Carnage's limp body. "I kind of like it when you're quiet. You should be this way more often."

She prepared to lay the body to rest only to hear a laugh.

"Well sorry to disappoint you." Raven's four eyes grew as suddenly Carnage's hand had a good grip on her face. "But I'm a motor mouth!"

Apparently the ability to shield a heart beat was an effective way of playing possum.

"Now let's see what your nightmares are like shall we?" Instantly Carnage's suit began to wrap around Raven's face until she was completely muffled. The pseudopodia seeped into her skin and began to unleash and absorb images that would make people scream like a baby.

Raven was yelling and squirming inside the grip, she too seeing the nightmarish images that the symbiote was burning into her mind. Carnage's laughing was out of control as suddenly a glowing "S" appeared on his head for a few moments.

"Back off!" Carnage's playtime was over as a red boot knocked him back on his rear end. The tendrils quickly recoiled and Raven gasped as she fell to the floor in a faint, with her face reverting back to the norm.

Spider-Man quickly ran over and picked Raven up, shaking her a bit. "Raven, you okay?"

"Oooh…"

"No freaking way." Carnage mumbled getting Spider-Man's attention as Raven slowly peered over weakly in her half-conscious state. "Somebody has a secret…"

"Cassidy, have you completely lost it?" Spider-Man quickly shook his head. "Ugh, never mind."

"Sorry Parker, I'm just a little star struck right now." Carnage got up and eyed Raven so dreamily. "I mean I knew all those kills would give me a ticket to Hell but this? Wow, now this is sweet!"

Suddenly a loud yelp could be heard closing in as it literally began to rain Titans. BB fell first, followed by Cyborg, Robin, and Starfire respectively as they tumbled across towards Spider-Man unconscious.

"You guys," Spidey looked on concerned as suddenly a black figure leapt across the building landing adjacent to his red counterpart.

"Now that was kickass!" Venom laughed as he was followed by Gizmo, Mammoth, and Jinx.

"Not as kickass of a time then I had." Carnage snickered as he quickly pulled Venom into a whispering conversation.

"N-no way, her?" Venom looked over towards Raven and lashed his tongue out. "Hahahaha!"

"Yea, a real she-devil of a girlfriend ya got there Parker." Carnage teased as Spidey just went quirky eyed.

"Hah," Venom pointed. "Now that is one fine piece of Beelzebutt!"

The two symbiotes began to crack up insanely as they almost fell over each other.

"Raven, what are they talking about?" Spider-Man looked down to see a girl that was as dim as she had ever been, almost as if someone had literally taken her spirit away.

Venom rubbed his head from the pain of laughter. "Don't worry Raven, we won't tell anyone. That's some news that we think you could bring out way better than we can. Your dad is going to be real proud."

Raven only shook her head.

"Damn," Carnage scowled. "I'm jealous now! I could never get a kinda body count like you're going to have! And to top it off? I can't even kill you now!"

"They know…" Raven whimpered a bit as she closed her eyes in disappointment.

"They know what?" Spider-Man asked only to be ignored.

"Heh, look at those pit sniffin' Titans." Gizmo chuckled as he was fiddling with something in his hands.

Mammoth nodded. "Fell like flies."

"My how the mighty have fallen, right Venny poo?" Jinx smiled she hugged on Venom, who of course sighed.

Gizmo suddenly tossed the small box of a contraption in his hands towards the Titans and an energy shield encased them, making an escape impossible.

"You Titans aren't "the" super group in town anymore." Venom strolled over to the shield and knocked on it mockingly. "This is the Fearsome Five's crib now."

"Damn you Venom." Spider-Man angrily flared. "Leave these guys out of this!"

"Blah blah blah blah." Venom turned to Gizmo with a wink. "Hey you Titans look tired… you should all take a little nap."

Gizmo grinned. "Nighty night losers!"

Suddenly the same gadget that created the shield began to emit a green smoke that quickly filled the shield, slowly bringing every Titan to a slumber. Spider-Man laid Raven down and fell on his knees trying to stay awake only to see his two newest teenage enemies glaring down on him with disappointing "tsks".

"Score one for the bad guys baby!" Carnage chuckled as he watched Spidey slowly drift off to sleep. The Fearsome Five looked at the six defeated Titans and then looked back at one another with victorious smirks.

"Who won! We won! Oh yeah!" Carnage celebrated as he suddenly took Jinx in a dancing motion he turned towards Venom. "You mind if I dance with your girl?"

"Whatever."

The two began to dance the Carnage waltz, Jinx laughing through out as she was being tossed, dipped, and spun around. Venom, Gizmo, and Mammoth only stared on stupidly.

"Good work my students." The five turned to see Brother Blood strolling towards them with an army of cloaked followers.

"Yo brotha!" Carnage prepared for a high five only to be stopped dead in his tracks with a furious scowl.

"Enough games," Blood looked at this self assembled group who quickly lined up with Venom and Carnage saluting mockingly. "I believe it's time we make an example of these Titans."

They all stared at the Titans who were now in dream land, Beast Boy sucking his thumb. Brother Blood chuckled to himself.

"Jump City is ours…"


	10. HIVE Five! Down Low! Too Slow!

**A/N: **This thing is updated so late what I did was evil. Sorry everyone! But good news is that this story is winding down, and will be completed sooner than later. Peace! - JB

--

( - The H.I.V.E. Headquarters - )

"Ugh… owie… meh…"

The sounds of pathetic groaning for you curious ones out there were coming from an 'I was totally out cold for only God knows how long' Spider-Man. The masked crusader slowly blinked in monotonous repetition as he awoke laid out flat on his back, staring up at that bright light in the sky.

_Uh oh… _Peter Parker's eyes twitched worryingly. _Waking up to a bright white light after fighting Carnage and Venom, that's so not good…_

"Glorious!" A cheery voice none other than Starfire's made Spider-Man's worries null, the boy yelping to an awkward sit, gingerly rubbing his head. "Finally you have awoken friend. We were quite worried."

Apparently that white light was just a really impressive lighting fixture.

"Heh s-sorry," Spidey rolled his peeping eyes up to the taller alien. "I needed the beauty sleep." A light chuckle followed.

"Tell me friend, what is the difference between a sleep of the norm and the sleep of beauty?" As always our clueless Tamaranean cutie was firing on all cylinders.

"Riiiight," Spider-Man petted her head, Starfire just blinking in reply, "I'll tell you some other time Star. Now if you all don't mind me askin'. Um, where the heck are we?"

"Your guess is about as good as ours." Robin replied calmly, kneeling across from them, inspecting what looked like a force field of an orange tint. This wasn't some half-assed jail cell those Jump City police officers deployed as he could tell.

"For some reason I doubt that." Spider-Man leapt up to his feet stretching, groaning instantly from the bruises and bumps he'd sustained. "Urgh those three little goons did a number on me." He complained, now rubbing his rear. "That pink haired one kicked my hiney good… literally."

"Dude," An angry growl came from an exhausted Beast Boy, the changeling glaring at Spidey in a bit of anger, tending his wounds. "Who were those freaks that knew who you were?"

"Those freaks are total trouble." Spidey explained, "Be thankful you're alive." A curious touch of the force field and his curiosity was thanked by an energy shock that Electro would've been proud of. "Y-yikes!"

"Man oh man," Cyborg walked over, scratching his chin as he glared at the field. "That 'thing' messed up my car." He began to steam like an overheated engine. "When I get my hands on him-"

"You'll give him a butt kicking. We know," Robin interrupted glaring at Cyborg. "But right now we need to concentrate on getting out of here. Since Raven's magic can't help us and Starfire can't break through, you and I have to figure out a way out of here."

"I'm already on it Robin." Cyborg's hand suddenly morphed into some sort of hi-tech field reader, scanning the energy cell.

"Y-yea, not being helpful… typical…" Raven suddenly muttered, Spidey hearing it all be it barely, the sorceress floating over to the far side of the room looking away from her teammates.

"Uh, what's wrong with her?" Spider-Man whispered over to Starfire.

"I am unsure friend. Raven has been quite angered after we had gotten the 'butt kicking." Starfire informed with a frown.

"Yea dude, I've never really seen her _this_ grumpy before." Beast Boy blinked. "And that's saying something."

"No kidding." Spider-Man stared, "So why don't we go talk to her again?"

"You make it sound so easy." BB's eyes went over too. "She won't say a thing."

"Oh?"

"Please friend can you try to speak to her?" Starfire pleaded.

"B-but wait," Spidey sweat-dropped, "You're her best friend and-"

"And she has the crush on you." Starfire retorted in a whisper, that large smile manifesting and shutting up Spider-Man quite expertly.

"Hold up. A-and how would you know this?" Spidey blushed behind his mask.

Starfire sighed. "Just please… speak to her." A gentle or rather 'gentle' nudge was given to good ol' Peter, sending the super-boy soaring in Raven's direction in a clutzy tumble.

_Gulp. _He made his reluctant approach._ Stay calm Pete, this is totally-_

"Don't even bother," Raven's reply came with no emotion at all, the sorceress floating in her meditating state, eyes closed and concentrating.

_Dang, _Spidey tasted failure._ I struck out without getting a single pitch! Never was a baseball guy..._

"Bother huh?" He took his delayed 'swing' "Um bother what?"

"Bother me," came the scowl. "Now just leave me alone."

"Huh…" This apparently was a bit more serious than at first thought. Spider-Man assumed he'd gotten pass this barrier of total coldness after showing off his skills at doing the whole 'I'm a goober and totally feel sorry for me' routine. Didn't that "date" mean anything to her at all? Then again her best buds the Titans were getting the same treatment. It was time to bust out the cuteness!

"Hey Raven, come on." Spidey leapt up cheerily and sat next to her. "What's wrong?"

"I would think you of all people could take a hint." Raven muttered not even giving him eye contact.

"Yea, but you should also think that I'm one that never listens to those hints." He countered.

Raven didn't even reply, Spider-Man deflating like a balloon that had been popped and then tossed into a blender set on the highest speed. He knew facing Carnage was a total buzz kill but Raven seemed like a girl who could rebound quite quickly. Apparently he was wrong.

Or was he?

"W-wait hold on," Spider-Man muttered, trying to play that fight in his mind again, quickly snapping his fingers. "Carnage," He pointed. "H-he did something… he had you in his… and then you said… you said…"

"Stop," Raven instantly turned eyes glaring white. "Don't even-"

"What did he-GAH!" Spider-Man's neck was suddenly in a gentle yet firm grasp of a tendril, the kid gagging a bit.

"Just drop it… got it?"

"Okay… but c-can you please… drop me first?"

Raven let go of him indifferently; turning away, staring out into the walled room they were stuck in, seeming even more troubled than before. Spider-Man looked over to the rest of the Titans breathing heavily, the group seing that little explosion, making wide faces as Spidey turned back to attempt another shot. Peter wasn't one of the greatest heroes of his time by not being persistent after all.

"Okay Raven before you choke me again. Whatever that's bothering you," He said almost in a whisper, "You can talk to me. I mean I've dealt with Carnage and Venom before. They can really mess with your mind. I know you haven't known me long but-"

"_He didn't mess with my mind."_ Raven's voice chimed in his head telepathically, turning to him that emotionless face no more. _"He… just showed me… or… reminded me… of…"_

"_Of… what?"_ Spider-Man thought back, staring at Raven's face which leaked out even more emotion_. "R-raven…"_

"_I'm supposed to do something bad."_ She continued reluctantly, _"I'm supposed to do something really really bad."_

"_I…"_ Spider-Man just sighed, suddenly putting a hand on her shoulder. _"Y-you can talk to me… or er… think to me anyway."_

"_I-I… don't want to say anything to them."_ She made a gesture over to her four Titan friends. _"I can't… they trust me too much."_

"_Raven,"_ Spider-Man shook her. _"What did Carnage do?"_

A long silence came until Raven just seemed to have an urge to let this burden off her back.

"_He saw my… destiny." _

"_W-what destiny? Y-you mean like your future? "_

"… _A lack of a future," _Raven corrected.

Spider-Man gulped. _"T-that doesn't sound… very nice…"_

"_It isn't." _ Raven just closed her eyes tightly, the worst feeling of failure and helplessness overwhelming her. _"I thought I could change things. I really did."_

Spider-Man blinked a few times yet again, just reactively patting Raven on the shoulder. He was going to fix this. It was going to take a little more than a few web-lines but it was going to be done.

"_Raven I know it's hard for you to elaborate on this-" _

"_It's too horrible to speak of."_

"_I understand." _He nudged closer to her. _"But you said you were supposed to do something bad. I honestly don't see how such a nice girl like you would even-"_

"_I have no choice."_

"_Everyone has a choice."_

"_N-no you don't understand."_

"_No, I think I do." _He put an arm around her all buddy like Raven not really making a reaction to it. Sadly even a telepathic body slam would've been a good reaction in Spidey's opinion.

"_I appreciate your concern, but this isn't-"_

"_Look, I may not know the details but everyone has a choice. Everyone controls their own destiny."_

"…"

"_Okay that does it missy," _Spidey pointed._ "You've forced me to do something I really didn't want to do."_

Raven blinks confused.

"_It's now officially story time!"_

"_Oh no…"_

"_Sorry but you give me no choice." _He chuckled, slowly getting more serious as he sat relaxed._ "You see Raven when I was a wee lad and first received my powers," _Spider-Man sighed a bit looking to the ground. _"I was the most selfish person in the world."_

Raven suddenly glanced over with a questionable glare. _"Y-you selfish?" _She shook her head, knowing that a word like that was the last thing that came to mind when thinking of him. "Nerd" was a much better choice.

"_All I could think about was money, impressing girls, becoming famous." _He told, _"The fact that I didn't care about anyone but myself took away one of the most important things in my life."_

"_Y-your uncle..." _Raven gagged as quickly as that reply came out, turning with concerned eyes. _"I-I am sorr-"_

"_You've read my mind."_

"_S-sorry it's just hard to do this telepathic connection without-"_

"_It's okay." _Spider-Man nodded making a friendly nudge. _"I trust you."_

Blush.

"_But I'm sort of glad you did read my mind anyway." _Spidey reassured._ "Then now you know how bad I could have turned out going in that same direction."_

"_Y-yes but-"_

"_I could've been the worst bastard in the world no joke." _Spidey thought. _"It took a loss of something totally dear to me to make me realize that I had the power to do good things." _He smiled. _"Raven no matter what you're 'supposed' to do. I know that a girl with a heart like yours will find a way around it. It's common sense." _

"… _It is?"_

"_Look, you're an always cool magician with a kick ass costume and I'm the biggest dork in the world. And if everything turned out fine for me... just think… well… mostly fine anyway." _He sighed._ "I don't think being in red and blue tights counts as 'fine' to most people."_

"_Y-yea usually people would recommend therapy?" _Raven suddenly did something that guaranteed Spider-Man his victory.

She giggled a bit.

"_Yea, yea, yea. Bash on the nerd boy." _His self-degradation made her chuckle a bit some more._ "Heh, now can we feel better yet?" _

"_Just a little..."_

"_A little goes a long way… I hope."_

There was a brief moment of silence, and then Raven let out a sigh – a sigh of the utmost relief. She turned as if she was going to get up and walk away, only to lunge forward and grasp around Spidey's neck like a vice. A clumsy trip later, and Spider-Man's mask eyes instantly bulged out, sweatdropping as he was just totally surprised by this expose of 'Starfire' like hugging.

With his arse on the floor, he couldn't even speak as his neck was being cranked. A few seconds of recovery and he just hugged back feeling like he was going to melt. And just as he was about to totally faint…

"Aw how cute!" Cyborg's voice instantly made both of them let go, Raven's crimson cheeks matching Spidey's costume as they hastily stood up in unison.

"It was only a bet!" Spider-Man retorted in their defense. "I bet her five bucks she couldn't hug harder than Starfire!"

"Riiiiiiight." Beast Boy and Cyborg replied teasingly, Raven about to bonk those two over the head with an astral created hammer.

**RUMBLE…**

"EEEK!" Beast Boy leapt up into Starfire's arms, changing into a kitty cat as the floor shook, a rectangular shaped hole forming in the middle of the room.

"Chill out will ya?" Cyborg inspected the crevasse only to suddenly see a platform rise up, a large plasma television making quite the grand entrance.

"Um, a television set," Spider-Man blinked. "What are they gonna do, T.V. us into submission?"

"If they force us to watch Sesame Street it's a possibility." Raven replied.

"Friends, it is just the T.V." Starfire giggled. "Maybe the 'World of Fungus' can be seen!"

"It is… but why would they…" Robin was about say, only to be interrupted by static on the screen.

"Why do I get a bad feeling about this?" Spider-Man groaned.

"Because you have women's intuition? Hah!" Carnage's face was never really a pleasant thing to look at.

"Har-dee-har-har," Spidey stewed in his anger.

"Aw lookie who's finally woken up!" The maniacal red symbiote grinned ugly, pointing. "It's da widdle iddy biddy Titans!"

"Cassidy you better let us out or I'll-"

"You'll what Parker? Nerd me to death?"

"Um… er… Maybe!"

"Oh quiet down," The camera pans out to show Venom sitting from behind tossing a yo-yo expertly while Jinx was clinging onto him. "Besides, why so grumpy? You all could be dead ya know."

" … "

"Although, who said you all wouldn't be?" Carnage added, snickering all the while.

"Dammit you two, why can't you leave these guys out of it and come deal with me?" Spider-Man growled at the box.

"Because that's no fun," Venom's tongue lashed out. "Besides, your friends are our enemies."

"And the fact that they're pit sniffin' losers doesn't hurt." Gizmo snickered from off camera while Mammoth's voice could be heard laughing.

"What do you want with us?" Robin's masked eyes thinned.

"Oh right now we want you to sit tight bird boy." Venom chuckled. "We're taking this thing world-wide."

"Oh yea," Carnage laughed. "The Fearsome Five just totally took you Titans all to school and we want the whole world to know about it!"

"Don't take it personally kids." Venom sighed, rolling his eyes at Jinx as she caressed his head. "We're just going to parade you around the H.I.V.E. party tonight as trophies, broadcast it to the whole world and then-"

"We're gonna kill you!" Carnage laughed, always seeming a bit too anxious when it came to the word 'kill'.

"R-right, what he said." Venom blinked.

"Well," Carnage placed his finger on his chin in thought, "Except for Spider-Dork's girlfriend of course. She has some unfinished business doesn't she?"

"Is this just a big joke to you?" Raven scowled, her fist clenched as her eyes began to glow.

"No sunshine, Gizmo trying to pick up chicks is a joke." The whole group started to laugh out loud, Gizmo grumbling in the background. "But take it as a compliment that I'm letting you live. I don't do that for many people. Before you, that'd be a zero!"

"Don't I feel special," Raven rolled her eyes.

"As you flippin' should!" Carnage pouted angrily. "Ms. 'Gets to have total fun before the world bites the big one' you!"

"Oh someone needs to shut you up!" Raven only turned a shade of angry red, as the others began to really wonder what exactly he was talking about. Carnage and Venom just shared a good laugh, totally entertained by what exactly they knew.

"Look you two ugly as heck jerks." Cyborg scowled. "If you don't let us out-"

"Weeeeell as fun as this has been hearing you all bitch and moan," Venom suddenly formed a Rolex on his wrist. "Damn would you look at the time?"

"Oh shnap!" Carnage leapt up, "We got a party to get ready for!"

"Ack! I need to get dressed!" Jinx blurted out turning to Venom and squeezing his head, those white eyes bulging. "I'm going to look extra special for you tonight Eddie."

"God damn girl… wait a sec… EDDIE?" Venom grumbled, suddenly dropping his yo-yo. "W-who told you our…" His head slowly creaked towards his ominous offspring. "Carnage…"

"Oh boy," Carnage took a deceptive lead. "See ya on the flip side!"

In seconds the symbiote chase was on and the T.V. feed was cutoff, the Titans just tapping their fingers being totally irritated beyond belief. Being pissed off was quite the understatement. As always Spidey tried to be Mr. Sunshine.

"Hey guys! You know what cheers me up at a time like this?" Spider-Man smirked, putting his arm around Raven and Robin. "A nice good ol' time of sing-along with-"

"Not… now…" Raven growled with clenched teeth along with the rest of the Titans.

"Y-yea…" Spidey slowly melted away, moping as he did. "Good call…"

( - Elsewhere at H.I.V.E HQ - )

_A year of being one of the worst villains on the planet and this is what we have to show for it. _Venom thought dismally as he stared at the mirror in front of him. _Whooptie freakin' doo._

Now all dismay aside folks, Eddie was quite nicely attired with his symbiote imitation Giorgio Armani tux. The reluctant feelings, while totally ill advised, were confirmed by a coil of his snake tongue in disgust.

"Yo dad!" Venom always cringed when he heard that voice, Carnage appearing from behind the darkened corridor. Usually that kid symbiote of his always kept Venom on his toes. But even after months of suffering through Cassidy's brand of craziness even he just wasn't ready for this.

"Am I lookin' pimpin' or what?"

"Um, we'd say," Venom mocked in thought, "Or what?"

"Oh shut up! You're just jealous." Carnage adjusted his crimson hat with a feather on it, those clawed hands straightening out his fur robe, not to mention a couple of H.I.V.E. hooded girls swooning on him from both sides.

"Oh God Carnage what are you-"

"Shhhhh!" The red symbiote pointed angrily. "The name's not Carnage anymore."

"Say what?"

"You can now call me the symbiote formerly known as Carnage." One of the H.I.V.E. girls turn cheerleader handed Venom a pamphlet. "That's my symbol V-dawg. What do you think?"

The symbol represented something that looked like a Tic-Tac Toe doodle. For Venom sweatdropping really didn't feel satisfying enough at this point.

"Um okay you Prince ripoff," Venom strolled over, staring that crimson crazy kid down. "We know we say this a lot to ya." He suddenly grew twice as big as normal. "BUT WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

"Gah!" Carnage and his apparent escorts to the party shrank a few sizes, scowling after. "Yo pops, take a chill pill would ya? You're killin' my game!"

"What freaking game?"

"Oh shut up," Carnage turned to his escorts apparently annoyed. "Okay ladies, I'll see you two later tonight. And if all goes well I'll see ya tomorrow morning too!"

"Okay Mr. Cassidy!"

The girls giggled while running off, Carnage sighing pleasingly. "That game…"

"Well we'd rather play Halo," Venom could only still shake his head. "And besides you're going to kill them aren't you?"

"Me? Kill?" Carnage smirked. "Hmmm… yea probably so…"

"How typical of you,"

"Oh typical shmipical I don't give a crap!" Carnage shrugged, beginning to do a little dance. "I'm having so much fun on this vacation from our cruddy universe! Oh yeah!" he tipped his pimp hat, forming a cane in his hand and twirling it.

"Y-yea," Venom shrugged, "It has been interesting for sure."

"Seriously! I mean getting younger, new scenery, shit I even got friends now. I feel like a total new person!" Carnage pranced.

"Heh, you do seem to have lost a bit of that edge you used to have." Venom pointed out, beginning to walk off to Blood's office.

"Oh yea and wait-wha!" Carnage gulped. "Lost my edge? What do you mean by that?"

"You've become softer, wimpier." Venom told it to him nonchalantly. "Having friends apparently changed Mr. Serial Killer into Mr. Cereal Eater."

"H-hey! Come on! Be fair dude! I'm still crazy! I'm still totally evil." Carnage growled angrily.

"Whatever you say Mr. Rogers… whatever you say…"

"Mr. Rogers! Oh why I oughta stab-"

"Oops, we're here!"

Carnage's temper slowly fluttered into nothingness the two symbiotes barging into the doorway of Blood's office, as always doing so with total disregard of respect. Carnage waltzes over to the seat sitting down, feet plopped up on the desk, Brother Blood rolling his eyes behind his bifocals.

"So what's on the agenda Brotha Bloodeh?"

"Mr. Carnage-"

"His name isn't Carnage anymore." Venom mocked, slipping over and standing behind the desk. "It's this sign." He handed it to Brother Blood who just as always grew irritated, burning the paper with a magic spell.

"Enough of the shenanigans," Blood commanded, sitting back in his chair. "You two have a lot to be proud of."

"Meh…" Venom corrected.

"Well, this is unprecedented Venom, what you two have accomplished in so little time." The Headmaster stood, looking down upon his students. "You two have led our school to new heights. Ever since word got out of your victory and capture of the Teen Titans our prestige is off the charts!"

"Huh," Venom crossed his arms indifferently. "Glad you're getting exposure. Blah…blah… blah… happy for your victories… blah blah blah… can we go now?"

"Your amusement could use a boost. But bottom line is you two are destined for great things." Blood smirked, doing his signature stroll. "Who knows, maybe soon the Society will be asking for your assistance?"

"Oh yea, 'The Society'. Hmmm, that anti Justice League group right?" Venom made a half-assed attempt at trying to be excited. "Such an original eh Carnage?"

"Zzzzzzz… Zzzzz…" Snore… Snore…

Obviously no answer was given.

The expose of boredom from Carnage only brought out another depressed sigh from Blood, he and Venom just staring at the napping symbiote.

"Don't worry we got this." Venom suddenly went down to his ear. "Oh God an all you can eat brain buffet!"

"W-WHAT!" Carnage leapt up, looking around frantically. "Where?"

"Dip shit…"

"Ugh." Blood just turned away, his tone sounding as irritated as ever. "Well students, I only brought you to encourage the good work. Tonight we have Jump City, tomorrow the world."

"Yea-yea-yea." Carnage walked out, "World Domination is alright brotha, but we're going to partay tonight baby! Let's go pops! Jinx is waitin' for ya!"

"Ugh, how the hell are we related again?" Venom grumbled, following his partner, the door slamming shut.

"I swear those two are as big of headaches as they are assets." Blood mumbled under his breath, going back to correcting some paperwork. His eyes were in total concentration although a bit of movement instantly caught his eye. The Headmaster turns his head around, scanning his room.

"Who's here?" He yelled out. "Show yourself!"

There was no reply.

The older man got up from his desk, eyes glaring red, energy erupting from his hands. "If you're a student I suggest you show your…self…"

What Brother Blood was looking at was something he only thought he could see in the previously hit T.V. show 'The X-files'. It was a puddle. But it was not of water. It was too thick, too red, and too… alive.

"What in the-"

Suddenly the puddle lashed out in a violent rage, coiling itself around the Headmaster. Soon his entire head was covered the H.I.V.E. leader gagging, almost feeling as if he was about to bite the big one. Blood groaned as he fell onto his knees, the worst pain coming from his head and his back. He soon fell to the floor, feeling a total change.

"T-the… pain…" His voice began to become more high-pitched yet warped, the man beginning to slowly decrease in stature and mass. The reddish black puddle was slowly taking over him, blanketing the now seemingly… younger Blood in a cover of crimson goop.

"W-what's happening?" The young boy whispered weakly.

_Calm down Sebastian. _He heard a voice in his head, the tone of it the most sadistic he's ever heard. _I'm not here to hurt you._

"W-what are you?"

_Heh heh heh… I'm here to unlock the you… that should have been… the name is Toxin… glad to be of service…_

"T-Toxin…"

_Yes... but as for our name… hmmm… Blood huh? I like it… don't you?_

"Heh-heh-heh, of course," Blood began to chuckle soon too, the pain giving way to an extreme euphoria of energy. "That'll make a great name for us. It's a classic."

_I couldn't agree more partnah…_

"Hmm, I feel like… I"

_Wanna kill something?_

"N-no…"

_Then what?_

"I want to kill everything…"

_Oh? Hehehehe… now we're talkin'… _

( - Where the Party At? - )

"You gotta fight!"

DUN! DUN!

"For your right!"

DUN!

"TO PAAAARTAY!"

The hip-hop music raged through two large cabinets being run through a DJ system that only one man… no… one boy could put together. And our disc jockey at the moment folks was of course DJ Baldy himself – the always foulmouthed Gizmo. If you'd ask anyone at the moment the party was definitely off the hook and the flashing lights, the loud music, and of course the high-strung teens of the H.I.V.E. were all there to be a proof of that fact.

"May I have this dance?" Venom suddenly awoke from his slobbering nap, shaking his head as he stared up at a sight that made his tongue roll out like a Hollywood red carpet.

"We… we… wowzers…" Venom blinked, apparently Jinx's 'prettying up' impressing even this cold bastard of a villain stupid.

Jinx had officially primped herself up. Her face was shadowed with dark highlights under her eyes. Her hair was no longer tied in that horn fashion, letting the pink hair flow loose from behind. She was in a pink silk dress that hugged her body with a mini-skirt that would make Jessica Alba jealous. One could only imagine what Venom was thinking as she sat on his lap.

"So, wanna dance my Oreo cookie?"

"Um," Venom gulped. "Blargh?"

"Hehe," Jinx nuzzled the black area between his eyes, "I'll take that as a yes?"

"We… well… we don't really dance-GAH!" Venom was yanked out by his arms, the tuxedoed villain moping, his tongue drooping out as Jinx held him close. According to Venom's total lack of an effort to actually strut his stuff, Jinx was literally doing the dancing for both of them and still obviously having fun. Soon by looking at Venom's cheeks Carnage soon wasn't the only red symbiote in the house.

"Heh, look at dad and Jinx." Carnage sighed teasingly, patting Gizmo and Mammoth on their heads harshly. "Ain't that the cutest thing ya ever seen?"

"S-sure…" The dynamic duo of the H.I.V.E replied together, shaking their heads at one another.

"Yea, oh well, I'm over it now." Carnage turned to Gizmo, "Time for the highlight of this awesome party. Let's unveil our spoils!"

"Finally," Gizmo scowled. "What were ya waiting for? Hell to freeze over?"

"Dude it already has." Carnage replied snugly, flipping his cane around as he made it to the large stage and cleared his throat into the mic. "Hey cut the music!"

Soon everything abruptly came to a stop, the lights all turning to the stage, all H.I.V.E. students totally attentive for once in their schooling lives. Carnage hit the microphone a few times and glared at all his fellow classmates, scratching his chin.

"You know the first day I came here," He sounded way too overdramatic, "I saw a lot of potential in this place."

"Oh brother…" Venom grumbled, rolling his eyes.

"And when our favorite brotha of all time," Carnage pointed to the crowd. "Brother Blood! Asked me and my pops to join you guys and become the most bad ass organization to ever walk the planet… We were honored…"

"Ugh, no we weren't."

"Aw what's the matter Venny poo?" Jinx giggled. "I think Carnage is so charismatic."

"And he's also a lunatic." Venom shot back.

"B-but aren't you the same?"

"Uh… we… huh… point taken…"

"And now when I look out at each and every freakin' one of you fellow baddies, I see the potential for the most terrible villain within all of you crazy cats!"

"YEAH!" The H.I.V.E. students roared back.

"Who says the good guys always win?" Carnage scowled. "For those who don't agree give me a 'Word up Carnage'!"

"WORD UP CARNAGE!"

"I'm glad you all agree because some people don't." The crimson symbiote smiled sickeningly, turning to the curtain behind him. "As you all know a certain "super" group named the Teen Titans don't agree with us at all."

"BOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"I know, I know. You all hate their guts just like I do. And honestly they probably kicked all of your asses at one time or another."

"BOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"But on a bright note… they've messed with you all for the last time!"

"WOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"And here as a gift to this school that has given me and my Fearsome Five gang so much." Carnage yanked back the curtains, turning to the crowd. "I give you the biggest band of losers on the planet the Teen-"

GASPS!

Carnage blinked a bit, that reaction not exactly what he had in mind. The symbiote scratched his head turning to Venom who in turn blinked as well, making gestures for Carnage to turn and be ready for something not good. Cassidy snapped his head back, instantly scowling as he did.

"W-what the?"

"Looking for someone Carnage?" A voice called out from above Carnage turning only to receive a glob of webbing to the face.

"Crap they got out!" Mammoth yelled.

"No shit Sherlock." Gizmo replied angrily, preparing to attack only to feel his whole DJ booth rumble.

"Azarath… Metrion… Zinthos!" The machinery at an instant was being torn apart by obsidian energies, apparently the whole room being cleared out by the same magic spell, a certain sorceress letting her anger flow out freely. Soon the other H.I.V.E members scampered out leaving only the Five in the room.

"Aw Jinx… and I actually thought we had something going on." Jinx and Venom heard the voice turning, being greeted with a barrage of Starbolts and Sonic Cannon blasts the two 'lovebirds' fleeing back for their lives. Carnage finally tore the webbing off his face only to see Spider-Man and Robin smirking at him.

"Miss us?" Spidey chuckled as suddenly a fist covered in red and one in green smacked him right in the face.

"OW!" Carnage fell back off the stage to be caught by Venom and shoved to his feet.

"We thought you said that shield was impenetrable!" The black and white symbiote scowled towards Gizmo.

"It was supposed to be ya jackass."

"Ya'll are right. But apparently your hi-tech whiz over there forgot to check his batteries." Cyborg informed.

"Ah slag it." Gizmo crossed his arms. "I knew I should've used Energizer!"

"Well duh!" Carnage smacked him across the head. "That frickin' bunny keeps going and going remember?"

"Seriously you bad guys need to quit this monologueing your plans stuff." Spider-Man was hanging upside down chuckling. "You had us as good as dead."

"Dammit we swear we promised ourselves not to do that anymore." Venom pouted slamming his fist into his palm.

"Dudes I am so ready for a little payback." Beast Boy smirked, shifting into a T-Rex as the Titans were totally ready to even the score.

"Hah, what makes you think this time is going to be any different?" Venom hissed, his tongue slurping out like a snake. "We're still going to wipe the floor with you."

"We'll see about that now won't we?" Raven sent a wave of inanimate objects that clanked and bopped that H.I.V.E. back a few notches.

"Ow! Y-you bitch!" Jinx whined as she was hit in the head with a glowing chair.

"Alright no more Mr. Nice Symbiote!" Venom growled as he just demolished an oncoming table with his claws.

The Fearsome Five backed into a corner regrouping, Carnage laughing as he and Venom coiled their suits into fighting mode, their work clothes forming in a brilliant flurry of pseudopodia. Jinx's eyes flared up pink, while her two best buds got themselves ready as well, attack pattern 'We're going to kick your ass' was going well and strong. The Titans from across the room were all together, Robin at the helm holding his staff as Spidey dropped in from up top.

"You may have caught us by surprise the first time." The Boy Wonder pointed in a challenge. "But this time we're ready."

"Yea, ready to die," Carnage formed axes in his hands in a chuckle as round two apparently was coming quickly.

Just as the two super groups were about to go at it the strangest thing occurred. There were loud claps coming from above them… okay fine that isn't too strange but it's still pretty trippy no?

Well at least these kids did…

All of the young gifted teens glared up, blinking at a teenage boy sitting in Brother Blood's balcony looking down at them chuckling. The boy was shrouded in clothes that looked like ones of a druid, a costume of brilliant reds and blues along with a long cape that magically fluttered in the motionless air. His gray skin rivaled the shade of the two sorceresses below and his eyes were a piercing red… blood red.

"And who the freak is this?" Carnage scowled. "Titan number seven?"

"Um, no," The Titans all replied together stupidly.

"Wait a sec," Venom's pseudo-eyes thinned.

"Brother… Blood?" Jinx whispered to complete Venom's thought, glaring up at apparently her reborn master.

"You were always the most perceptive Jinx dear." The boy laughed, levitating into the air.

"Um…" Spider-Man scratched his head looking around. "Is this a good thing for us?"

"No," Raven answered quietly, her empathic nature picking up the most troubling energies she had ever experienced. "Definitely no…"

"Um, I don't think this is a good thing for us either." Jinx retorted, the group as silenced as they had ever been. Taking into account that Spider-Man, Beast Boy, and Carnage were part of the group this was a miracle in itself.

"Aw why so quiet you all?" Blood continued to laugh it up, staring down with his toothy smile. "I'm here to kick start this little shin dig, not totally kill it… well not at first anyway."

"That's brotha?" Carnage gasped pointing. "You didn't tell us you could pull a de-aging you sly dog!"

"It's funny you say that because I couldn't," Blood smiled, this boy of his teenage years even more cryptic then his older counterpart. "That is until I got some help from you… daddy-o."

"Say… what?" Carnage twitched, Venom instantly doing the same while the others just kind of stared on stupidly.

"Hehehe, so this is Venom and Carnage." Blood lowered himself gliding next to them. "The Mary Kate and Ashley of the symbiote world!"

"MARY KATE AND ASHLEY?" Carnage and Venom growled, steaming in anger soon afterwards.

"Hah! Mary Kate and Ashley!" Spider-Man began to laugh uncontrollably, two scowls from his worst enemies quickly shutting him up. "Um… t-that wasn't funny…"

"I'm really kinda ticked off," Blood's voice seemed so without care, "Y-you've been holding out on me since you've gotten here. You never told me how two pathetic little kids like yourselves become such evil little power houses. Come on pops… grandpa… what's up with that?"

"Um Carnage," Venom looked over a bit worryingly, "Have you been um having strange cravings lately?"

"What kind of stupid question is that?" Gizmo chimed in only, to have a black tendril wrap his mouth up.

"Um well I kind of had the strangest urge to eat a salami and peanut butter sandwich with pickle and anchovies last night." Carnage shrugged.

"Oh cripes," Venom scowled. "We think we all got a BIG problem here."

"Good call grandpa." Blood laughed his voice warping as suddenly a sea of red ooze began to leak out from his body.

Everyone just kind of jaw dropped and went wide eyed at this start of a hideous transformation. Those gloved hands suddenly formed sharp claws, that druid costume slowly coming alive as tendrils lashed out. A mask that rivaled either Venom or Carnage in ze ugliness formed with teeth just as sharp and large white pseudo eyes just as beady. A warped roar signaled that this creature had shifted to its darkest form, its saliva seeming to be a dark crimson red liquid… it was more like blood. Cancel that… it was blood!

"I feel… so complete…" Blood hissed, chilling laughs erupting from this ugly being as energies of red crackled from his entire body.

"Well this is unexpected and totally bad." Spider-Man sighed. "My life in a nutshell…"

"Um yo pops…" Carnage gulped.

"Y-yea?" Venom blinked.

"Don't tell me I just-"

"Gave birth?"

"HE DID WHAT!" Everyone yelled in unison, Venom and Carnage shrinking on the spot.

"Now there's another one of you?" Spider-Man turned to his two symbiotic enemies.

"Cool I have a kid," Carnage twitched as he suddenly cleared his head, turning to Venom angrily. "Dammit pops why didn't you warn me about this? I thought I should've had birth pains or something!"

"Hah, we tried to warn you about this!" Venom retorted angrily, "You didn't want to listen remember?"

"Well… well… that's cause you suck as a predecessor!"

"Um," Cyborg blinked at this more than unusual conversation as he turned to Spidey. "Man what kind of universe do you come from?"

"I don't even know anymore." Spider-Man answered.

"Shut up. T-this… isn't good…" Raven scowled looking at anyone, "We have to go… and we have to go now."

"That's a nice thought but no one's going anywhere cutie." Blood bellowed, his tendrils coiling as his pseudo eyes began to glow red. The room suddenly began to get hazy an essence of crimson energy that seemed like dust began to fume out of Blood like spores.

"W-what's happening…?" Spider-Man suddenly held his head, an aching pain just shooting up his spine. Soon the rest of the group began to experience the same thing, Cyborg, Venom, and Carnage the only exceptions.

"Yo guys what's happening?" Cyborg ran over to Spider-Man shaking him, seeing his teammates and the H.I.V.E. kids clutching their heads. "Spidey you alright?"

"Y-yea man," Spider-Man began to laugh looking up and smirking behind his mask. "Sorry I can't say the same for you …"

"W-wha? BLAH!" Cyborg was suddenly driven through a wall by a drop kick of the worst kind, Spider-Man laughing as he leapt straight back up, his eyes from under the mask began to glow red.

"That was a cheap shot," Robin growled from behind, his eyes mimicking Spider-Man's as he took out a few bird-a-rangs.

"Hah, cheaper than that suit you call a costume?" The arachnoid countered. "You seriously need a makeover Robin… let's start by giving you the beat down of your life shall we?"

"Bring it on bug boy," Robin growled, launching himself into battle with his fellow teammate, these two heroes suddenly having a mean streak that rivaled the X-men's Wolverine.

"Do not start the fun without me boys!" Starfire growled her eyes as red as her sister's. "The people of my race thirst for battle!"

"Oh shut up you cheery little ditz." Beast Boy chuckled as he pointed, glowing eyes not escaping him. "Dude I'm so going to enjoy kicking your alien ass!"

"Hah! At least your confidence humors me more than your so-called jokes you Xabelwaaf!" Starfire replied, sending a hefty amount of Starbolts in Beast Boy's direction, the imp snickering as he shifted into an eagle. The alien quickly gave chase.

"Friends…" Raven looked at her teammates, fighting this urge to kill everything in sight with her own empathic blanket.

The source of this hatred was obvious to Raven and as Blood began to spew out more of this evil essence, soon the blanket of aggression was surging throughout the H.I.V.E complex like a cancer. The empathic powers of the symbiote and Blood's telepathic abilities weren't a good combination and Raven knew that this was only going to get worse.

Blood and Carnage's child were now a team. A team Hell bent to make mankind destroy one another.

"You two forgot what it means to have this bond." Blood pointed to Venom and Carnage who just sweatdropped. "It's time to remind you what we symbiotes are all about."

Venom and Carnage just gulped. The fun and games were officially over…


	11. Anime Armageddon

Alrighty for the sake of warning, we got some good news and some bad news. Okay first the _bad_ news is that Jump City is officially, absolutely, and positively bonkers. Now secondly the _good_ news is… well… um… huh…

I just saved a butt load of money on my car insurance by switching to Geiko! Ain't that awesome?

**CRASH!**

Now that, my friends, is the bountiful sound of two cars slamming into one another at a nice calm speed of 80 miles per hour! Which should be expected. But the way those red eyed civilians were thrashing on one another soon afterwards wasn't. Talk about road rage! Though even then this scuffle was as relatively minor as can be, after seeing how the rest of the city was fairing of course.

Jump City was now Blood's canvas. And he and Toxin were original Picassos.

There was a war going on. And in this war, the lines of good and evil were more blurred than a cruddy dubbed anime that you've recorded on a cheap VCR and tape for a friend. Citizens were fighting citizens. Heroes were thrashing heroes. Villains were beating on villains. Where are your saviors when you need them?

In all fairness even Venom wouldn't have been a bad option right now.

(Cue Scooby Dooby Doo theme!)

_Come on Venny Poo! Where are you? We've got some butt to whoop now!_

Where were our heroes? Sleeping on the job? Getting some R and R? Nope! In fact they were totally hands on at the moment. But in that fact there lays the biggest problem of all.

"Gyah!" Emerald eye beams slashed a building literally in half, Starfire not showing this kind of rage since Robin was forced on that date with Kitten.

The starbolts and energy blasts continued to rain down from the skies above, Starfire's little green target scurrying off like the little speed devil he was. Beast Boy made a living on frustrating his enemies, and as the emerald cheetah of a boy darted into the safe haven of a few trucks and cars he was doing exactly that.

"Come on Starfire, is that the best you got?" Beast Boy snickered toothily in his human form, the kid's face looking as evil as can be. (Not very evil obviously)

Starfire's eyes glowed in frustration, righteous fury pumping through her veins. "Come out from hiding you… you… you… Zabblegorf!"

"Oh boohoo," Beast Boy laughed. "Don't cry your heart out just because you want me!"

"It is I who wants you? Hah!" Starfire's opened palm was glowing an intense green. "We Tamaraneans are a warrior race! I would never fall for what you are. And you are what you Earthlings call the wimp!"

"A wimp? Are you-Whoa!" The truck Beast Boy was behind suddenly ignited into flames, the explosion sending him rolling across the ground like a green rubber ball. Spinning and shattering into a dazed glare inside a Starbucks coffee shop, BB quickly found himself with a purple boot on his neck.

"Say good night 'friend'!" Starfire beamed evilly down with those sharpened teeth, threatening to crush her teammate's throat. BB shook out of his daze, gagging a bit only to look up confidently.

"No, I think I'll say screw you Tinkerbell!"

The feeling of Beast Boy's crushing grip on Starfire's ankle made her yelp a bit, the alien surprised by her young teammate's strength. The changeling's laughs turned into growls, his face elongating, his green skin sprouting fur. Soon he was about twice the size of his alien comrade, having Starfire by her ankle that now seemed like only a twig.

"Eeeeek!" Starfire grimaced at the strain on her ankle, only to angrily rear back, preparing to fire a Starbolt against Beast Boy's chest. The werebeast didn't even hesitate, leaping into the air sidestepping the blast, hurling poor Koriand'r through a concrete wall and straight through it bowling ball style.

The emerald beast let out a yell to the moon, roaring at other civilians who obviously made haste like Tokyoites did for an invading Godzilla!

That is except for one person.

"Wowzers sooo cool." Beast Boy heard that cocky voice from outside along with mocking claps.

"Really BB, good work! Werewolf transformation totally original." Spider-Man sighed, playfully tapping his finger on his head. "But here's an idea for a next transformation! Why not morph into something that can tell a good joke for a change?"

RAAWR!

"Sheesh, a little criticism and they go A-wall."

Beast Boy roared, launching his claws towards this overly snug Spider-Man in a primal fury. Peter Parker just swayed in the wind a bit before initiating into his super uber counter attack. As the werebeast came, almost in a flash, BB found his grotesque head rammed into a brick wall. A taunting Spidey turned, to the glass of a nearby store, glaring at the reflection of Beast Boy trying to pry his head out.

"Mirror mirror on ze wall, who looks like an ass and is about eight feet tall?" Spider-Man sang looking at Beast Boy who finally got his head out of that trap. "Well what do ya know Beast Bum? It's you!"

Beast Boy just growled again as he broke free, the primal monster screaming out as he charged recklessly. Those jaws opened, spit spewing out, total disgusting imagery firing on all cylinders. But once again this Spider-Man didn't even flinch, a confident smile appearing, as he suddenly drove his fist into Beast Boy's chin.

"Just like I took care of Robin," The gray strands of web entwined around the changelings legs, BB crashing down against the pavement in a whiplash. "It's lights out punk!"

Boom! It was clear that the primal beast was knocked out. And while BB reverted back to his normal form Spidey dusted off his hands. "Now who else wants-"

**SPIDER SENSE! **

Spider-Man gasped suddenly backflipping onto a wall as a few projectiles whizzed by his head. The arachnoid turned, noticing that ninja stars were now jammed into the wall. They were in the shape 'x's, being such a close call that Spidey just had to feel at his face to make sure it was still there.

"And who the heck are you supposed to be?"

The black clad being who attacked sat upon the lamp post staring down with pupiless eyes. A laugh started to echo as Spider-Man just stared stupidly.

"Whoa Robin?" Spider-Man mused. "I thought you did the smart thing and ran away. Overestimated smart ol' Robbie's instincts apparently."

"Nah," Robin thinned his masked eyes. "I just took your advice and ditched the old uniform." He admired his suit as his tattered cape blew in the weak winds. "I was more of a dark suit kind of guy anyway."

"Riiiight," Spider-Man brushed off this new suit like it was yesterday's news. "So you think just because you've got some new black suit that you're suddenly any tougher?" the boy blinked. "Wait… why does this sound so familiar… ugh… oh yeah…"

"This isn't just for the look." A mask was suddenly adorned, a skull with a crimson X carved into one of the eye slits. "And the name isn't Robin… it's Red X…"

"Red X?" Spider-Man shook his hands mockingly. "Oooh, I'm so scared."

"You shouldn't be. I promise you won't feel a thing." X just smirked making a countdown signal with his fingers.

_Uh oh…_

"Spider soup anyone?"

And now those red stars began to glow brightly.

_I think I better move…_

**KAAAAAABLOOOOEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!**

- ! -

Pizza Palace. A place where the Teen Titans were often found munching down on the most delectable of pizza pie on numerous occasions. If one were to see that rotten hallow refrigerator of theirs then no questions really would be asked. But right now wasn't pizza time. It was more like survival time!

A groan whisked out of an alleyway, Raven holding her head as she was leaning up against the wall. Her memory seemed to take a hit as she could only piece together some images here and there.

Let's see. First her friends went ballistic. Then her mind felt like it was being torn apart. Then she fled wildly blindly probably bumping her noggin at a few places. And oh yea, Brother Blood was now a teenage psychopath that was even uglier than Carnage and Venom put together. Fun!

"Oh no," Raven gasped, eyeing the end of the alleyway, seeing herds of civilians wailing on one another. She clutched her head as she remembered how much telepathic and empathic muscle it took to resist that shot of aggression Blood and his symbiote were unleashing. Brother Blood was great at playing tricks on the mind. The symbiote only amplified and made those powers more extreme.

Raven could see the red energies in the air – the violence and the anger being poured out into the streets like fruit punch on a glass table.

"I've got to do something." Sneaking out of the alley against the wall seemed like the best action. Everyone in the city was literally hell bent on aggression after all

"Get her!" She heard them scream.

_I swore stealth was usually my thing_. Raven thought as she prepared to rock that Azarath chant only to pause.

"I can't hurt them." She realized, backing up as she levitated objects in the form of crates to use as a barricade. She turned once she finished, only making a violent contact cheek to cheek with a certain someone.

"Oof!" Raven fell on her rear, glancing up to see pink eyes staring right at her.

"Oowie…"

"Stay back!" Raven growled, her hands being in a position to cast a spell.

"Gah!" Jinx flipped up from her fallen position ready to fight back. "No! You stay back you-… you… w-wait, are you giving me a warning?"

"What else does it sound like?"

"Weird," Jinx blinked, her energies lowering. "You're the first one that hasn't just tried to beat the snot out of me out of no where. Even Gizmo and Mammoth tried to."

Raven reluctantly stopped the glow in her hands as well and nodded. She felt none of that aggression in Jinx. Ironically…

"Apparently besides us," Jinx scratched her head, "the whole city's gone crazy."

"Gee, what makes you think that?" Raven motioned at the crazy civilians trying to get to them.

"Totally Resident Evil style," Jinx made a chibi scared face.

"Yea, and it's all because of your H.I.V.E."

"I know! Isn't it awesome?"

Sweatdrop.

"But hey now," Jinx pointed. "How are you not insane to the membrane?"

"If my mind could be taken that easily this world would've been gone along time ago," Raven brushed herself off. "Being telepathic doesn't hurt. Now can I ask you that same question?"

"Heh, it wasn't easy." Jinx rubbed her head. "But I did it the same way you did."

"Um, since when were you telepathic?"

"Hey, a girl has her secrets." The pink lovin' thief rolled her eyes. "You think hexing magic is all I can do?" the girl grinned suggestively. "I've dove into plenty of dark magic that's a bit too dangerous. I just choose not to use them."

"Huh-"

BAM! The civilians slammed their only barrier away. Jinx's eyes instantly turned pink ready to hex these normies to Hell.

"No! Don't hurt them!" Raven grabbed her hand, levitating the two up into the air. Jinx eeped as she was pulled from the ground, dangling by her wrist.

"Hey! I'm going to defend myself if needed alright?"

"Yea well it's not needed." Raven landed the two on top of a rooftop, instantly being met with another mob of brawlers. Chains and crowbars aren't fun to see when being confronted by angry people.

"You were saying?"

"Oh shut up," Raven flicked her wrists suddenly pulling the weapons away, wrapping the citizens with the metal peeled away from the pipes of the building. The victory was short lived though as the sorceress turned to see Jinx's hands right up against her face glowing pink.

"You've got to be kidding me." Raven blinked.

"Stand still," Jinx warned.

Suddenly a crack against the ground could be heard, the teenage woman who was about to smack Raven from behind with a bat being stuck in the hole. The blue hooded girl turned back to see Jinx smirking.

"I didn't hurt that precious little innocent girl and now we're even."

Raven breathed a sigh of relief inside. "Glad we're on the same page."

HORRIBLE REALIZATION!

"Uh after this is done?" Raven growled. "This never happened."

"Deal," Jinx sighed. "Besides don't flatter yourself. I gotta help my boys and you're the only one that's sane enough to listen. Poor Venom and Carnage are gone. And my two best buds are probably beating the heck out of one another right now."

"Nice sob story," sarcasm rang, "But we'll stop this. My teammates are in trouble too."

"Sob story?" Scowls! "Hey my friends are just as important as yours Ms. I'm a big hero. Just because we're the 'bad guys' doesn't mean we're chopped livers k?"

"It's your fault. You all started this mess."

"Obviously Venny Poo and Carnage didn't know this was going to happen."

_Venny Poo?_

"And I know Headmaster Blood would never do this under normal circumstances!"

"…"

"Okay then again maybe he would," Jinx scowled. "But not all of us villains want this type of end of the world trouble. We just wanna have some nice innocent, fun!"

"Innocent? Whatever," Raven looked around, "There's no time for arguing."

"What do you mean there's no time? Like you have an idea to stop this?"

"As a matter of fact I do."

"How?"

"We're going to do the same exact thing Blood is doing." Raven closed her eyes, a magical orb forming in front of her.

(Jinx gives a look at the reader, and makes the 'she's crazy' sign.)

The orb suddenly took shape, soon forming into that meditation mirror Raven used as a pathway to her mind. The sorceress grabbed the mirror and stared at it with those steady eyes.

"We need to revert all this negative energy into a calm state."

"And you're telling me this little beauty mirror is going to do that?" Jinx suddenly gasped. "Wait, the Ice Queen has a beauty mirror?"

"Quiet," Raven just groaned in annoyance. "Whatever Brother Blood is doing I can use this to counteract it."

"Sounds complex," Jinx frowned. "What are the chances this works?"

"Slim to none." Raven replied calmly, "But we have no choice."

"Well you're the "good guy", and you good guys always seem to win." Jinx rolled her eyes, "Yea I can see how this is slim to none."

"Oh why don't you-"

Wham! Suddenly a car flew by the two girls, both ducking as the massive vehicle rolled across the rooftop and hit the street with a thud. Instantly the girls noticed two combatants duking it out at a furious pace. A red blur and a black blur there was. Apparently X and Spidey were at each other's throats.

"What was that?" Jinx hid behind Raven.

"Robin… Spider-Man…"

- ! -

A symbiote's daily To Do list:

1) Find new ways to make all organisms on the planet become symbiotic hosts.

2) Eat some brains!

3) Kill those said newb symbiotic hosts and try your best to create all out anarchy!

4) Eat even more brains!

5) Fumigate the host's living quarters to make the crib a smexy bachelor pad!

6) (Cough) Brains! (Cough)

7) Be forced to watch host's favorite TV shows to make them feel somewhat appreciated.

8) Give me a B! Give me an R! Give me an A! Give me an I! Give me an N! Give me an S!

9) Look totally Burt Reynolds badass while doing all these things!

10) Brai-… um is this really necessary?

If one would ask Venom and Carnage how they were doing with said list then all would be checked besides number 3. Sure the world was full of anarchy and a new symbiote host was there at the moment. But there was one big problem…

They weren't creating the problems!

"Cruddy cruddy crud vapors!" Carnage growled, shoving a dumber than usual Mammoth to the side with ease. "This isn't what was supposed to happen! I was supposed to be the star!"

"Oh shut up!" Venom heard his teammate's whining, now being even more irritated than a disturbed bees' nest. "This is all your freakin' fault!"

"Say what?" Carnage turned to Venom dumbfounded while jumping out of the way of a chunk of concrete wall being hurled at him. "It's not all my fault assface!"

Venom gave the stare of doom.

"Okay so it's mostly my fault!"

"Ugh, you need to pay more attention to detail!" Growl! "Every damn time with your 'I gotta act psycho and make everything into a freaking spectacle!' routine!"

"Oh and you don't do the same thing with your dual identity crisis?" Carnage replied. "We, our, us, you sound so stupid just to make yourself seem different!"

"We-… well… um… at least our name isn't Cletus!"

Carnage gasped as if he had been stabbed in the heart. "Oh you just did not go there!"

"Yea we did!" Suddenly Venom's eyes budged, sensing something from behind as a few signature Gizmo smart bombs were sent his way.

"Fry in Hell ugly!" That baby-faced villain yelled.

"Aw, and here we were hoping we'd be poached or something." Those smart bombs were easily batted to the side with a heavy dose of tendrils, exploding at a safe distance. Gizmo gave a pissed off sigh as the attack failed, only to get even angrier as he found himself dangling upside down soon after.

"Let me go you pit sniffin moron!" The kid struggled. "I'll get you!"

"You better calm down shrimp before we think about having an early dinner." Venom threatened. One could never tell when this guy was joking or not. Playing it safe seemed like the best option… for a sane person anyway.

"Oh! So the big bad Venom is hungry huh?" Gizmo chuckled evilly, suddenly a hi-tech Star Trek looking blaster popped out of his backpack. "Why don't you have a nice big serving of sonic salsa snizzle breath?"

"… Crap… GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"Pops?" Carnage blinked as he turned to see no one.

"DIE BUG!"

_Always with the bug thing. Damn you Parker! _Carnage easily dove under another haymaker, the red symbiote doing a great Ichiro Suzuki impression, skidding into a flipping recovery.

"Mammoth! Chill out!" Carnage backed off as he was being barraged with swings. "What's up with the hostility? We're cool dude!"

SLAM!

Carnage's head became friends with a lamp post, the symbiote finding himself tumbling across the floor only to have a mailbox break his skid. "G-guess not," Cassidy grumbled, getting up suddenly snapping his neck into place, and his feisty temper up to the norm.

"Oh that does it!" Carnage's suit began to erupt in axes and blades, slinging around wildly. "No more Mr. Nice Carnage!"

Mammoth didn't even flinch as fear wasn't even a passable emotion anymore. The tank for a villain went off with his bat for a lamppost ready to take another swing. A slash, a slash, and another sneaky slash later and the big metahuman suddenly found himself weaponless. A solid kick to the face that drew blood and our big fuzzy beat was now slumped against a truck KO'd.

"Everyday is a good day to die ain't it?" Carnage began to laugh his psycho laugh, a blade sliding in for the kill. Any other time and this would've been another swift murder to put under his belt. But apparently not this time…

"W-what?" Carnage blinked, suddenly letting his blade coil back into his suit, the symbiote seemingly shaking 'no'. "What the Hell is happening?" his eyes bulged! "No way… I can't!"

"Huh? You can't what?" Venom grumbled irritably, not even getting a reply as he was yanking a webbed up Gizmo like a sack of potatoes. Eddie's suit seemed to be a bit agitated at the moment, probably from that sonic smorgasbord he had just been unwillingly invited to.

"I can't… kill him." Carnage muttered. "I can't do it…"

A pin drop could be heard. Until…

"Bwaaahahahahahaha!" Venom did his best Side Show Bob impression, tossing Gizmo onto a wall to let the kid hang, a bunch of swears that were probably best left unheard being quite audible.

"This is not funny!" Carnage's eyes thinned. "Shut up!"

"Oh hold onto your symbiote sunshine, it's simple logic" Venom rolled his eyes. "He's your friend. There's a human impulse not to kill your friends. Apparently you consider this big monkey a friend."

"B-b-b-but… no! I've killed allies before!" Carnage scowled. "This is embarrassing! I'm me! Carnage! This doesn't happen to me! I am the baddest mother fuc-"

"Like we said," Venom interrupted quite timely. "You're getting soft and you know it."

"N-no!" The deranged killer frowned, forming his mask into a cheap rendition of the infamous Darth Vader mask.

(Dramatic Music!)

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Sweatdrop.

"God what is the matter with this place?" Carnage tantrumed as he frantically sputtered around. "It's official! This place is just not right!"

"Uh, you mean this universe?"

"Yes I mean this universe!" Carnage literally grabbed the giant drop of sweat away from Venom's head. "Seriously, what is this shit?"

Blinks.

"And this is just the beginning!" Carnage screeched. "Tell me Smarty pants. How come every time we get mad or pissed off at something we turn all red and steam shoots from our ears?"

"Uh…"

"And why do we shrink like to bug size and start distorting when Brother yells at us?"

"Um…"

"And why does everyone have such big ass eyes?"

"…"

"This place is messed up pops!" Carnage tossed the sweatdrop away, grabbing Venom by his symbiote suit, "I wanna kill! And I wanna kill now man!"

Silence.

"Uh dude," Venom began to slowly back away as he shoved him off. "And you said we had problems?"

"On the contrary," The snuggest of voices said from up high. "Both of you have problems. And quite sizable ones at that."

Venom and Carnage just sighed pathetically as they heard that bad news voice, peaking up in a totally screwed manner.

"Well if it isn't sonny boy." Carnage hissed. "Finally decide to fight us yourself instead of giving us this world gone mad stuff?"

"It was just a parting family present dad." Blood replied, chuckling as Toxin was running rampant from within. "I'm giving you and grandpa one last peak at the ultimate success of our race before I rid the world of the both of you. You two have forgotten what it means to be a part of the symbiote race."

"Uh news flash child from Hell," Carnage pointed. "Buuuuut, me and V-dawg wrote the book on how to be a stand up symbiote alright?"

"Yeah!" Venom crossed his arms.

"And I'll be damned if some punkass newbie wants to rain on my party ya dig?"

"Yea foo!" Venom egged on.

"So you want a piece of us? Bring it! Cause I am so in the mood for kicking someone's ass right now!"

"Oh yeah!"

"Hah," Blood scoffed out of amusement. "Always the confident ones aren't we? Sure, all be it sometimes delusional and ill-willed but it's all fine by me. I'll be glad to rid our race of the stench of two of the most washed up symbiotes to date."

With a childish laugh, the symbiotic Blood slowly lowered himself to the floor Magneto style, his robe beginning to ooze out psudedopodia that morphed into blades. As the crimson fluids of life dripped down his fangs and his claws gave a red glow, the monster dared one of them to strike first.

Second thought is now the keyword for today.

"Um," Carnage blinked awkwardly as he stared at those blades. "You want first dibs Venom?"

"… No!"

- ! -

It was rockin like a hurricane! No, not that cool 80s Scorpions metal song but it was like one of those big in your face hurricanes that was sweeping through downtown Jump City. Bam! Clash! Boom! Even if you were staring at it from yards away you might have not been able to keep up.

Red X was fast.

Spider-Man was fast.

And of course by the laws of mathematics fast plus fast equals really really fast!

Woosh! A spinning blade swiped nothing but air as our crimson arachnid managed to dart out of the way of yet another near decapitation. Spidey was doing the usual acrobatic bit. He flipped and he twirled, leaping with a swirl, X not letting up even a bit as those twin blades of destruction swiped over and over.

Roundhouse! Block! Uppercut! Parry! Toss! Flip! The fight had been going back and fourth for quite awhile now, X's gadgets keeping Spidey at bay quite efficiently. And as another spray of synothium energy came across Spidey's nose in a singe, the thoughts of ending this fight right away came to mind.

"Time to wrap this sucker up," Spider-Man stated with the utmost confidence, suddenly engulfing X in the largest batch of web he could muster. Against his will X went into the web-cocoon stage, eeking as he hit the floor face first.

"Ouchers… ugh, webbing?" X grimaced as he was being wrapped in the stickiness, "What a freaking lame trap."

"Hey it gets the job done doesn't it?" Spider-Man replied snugly, "Someone's a bitter loser."

"I agree," X scowled as his belt glowed. "And it's you!"

The ability to phase your whole body hundreds of yards away ain't so bad right? Sure it isn't. That is unless you were Spider-Man at the moment.

_Teleportation is so not cool!_

"Neat trick with the webbing."

_So so so so not cool!_

"But as cool as that is. I must say welcome to the 21st century dude." Spider-Man turned to be face to face with an as always arrogant X. "And in this day and age we have a thing called 'technology'! Let's explore that term shall we?"

"Um, I don't think we should… BLAH!" Spidey was pancaked, slamming into a concrete wall, the infamous red adhesive gel holding him there like a mounted painting. Apparently his super strength wasn't enough as he struggled to pull away, having about as much success as the Buffalo Bills in the playoffs.

"Boy that never gets old baby!" X began whistling a victory tune as he let his blades spin like saws again, Robin's alter ego moving in for the kill. "Don't worry my arachnid buddy. This will be over before you know it."

"W-wait!" Spider-Man shook his head. "That's impossible! Cause I know it's over now!"

"Uh," X just blinked. "Oh well, too bad then. You better start worrying."

"… You suck."

The blades were coming closer. Spidey was struggling wildly. Was this the end of our favorite arachnid hero? Was Peter Parker going to become nothing but a diced and sliced memory? Am I going to kill time and writing space to ask more questions? Are you sick of question marks yet? Well?

"Robin!"

And with a shout that let it out from Raven's lungs all was right with the world. Uh, relatively speaking of course… well then again, not even that. More like figuratively speaking… wait, that can't be because what kind of figure am I talking about? Ya know what… uh, X… save me here!

"Well, well, well," X turned, "Now what do we have here?"

"Ugh, Robin snap out of it." Raven pleaded as she walked over to him. "This isn't you. You have to fight this urge. You can't do this."

"Urge huh?" X laughed childishly almost ignoring everything Raven said as he eyed her up and down. "Are we thinking of the same urges here?"

"Naughty boy Robin is with the mask." Jinx replied, lagging behind a bit for her own safety. "Oh this is hopeless. Give it up and let bug boy bite the big one."

"Shut up!" Raven disregarded her obviously only temporary ally, turning back to see X right in her face.

"You know," X held her hand, "I don't know why I've bothered flirting with that red-haired airhead all this time. I should've been using that time on you."

Raven just gave one Hell of a skewed face.

"Smooth," Jinx blinked. "But w-why isn't he clobbering you? He's like putting the moves on you."

"Aw, someone's jealous?" X turned to Jinx. "Don't worry baby. There's plenty of me to go around."

Jinx and Raven just made that unofficial girl sorority eye contact, not knowing really what to think of this. Apparently Blood's primal epidemic of savagery didn't kill the human impulse of 'getting it on'How typical no?

"Um, as satisfying as that sounds Boy Blunder," Jinx scowled. "I'm already taken thank you very much!"

"Anyways, sorry to be so rude but," X gently shoved Raven back. "Stand back toots. After I finish this punk off, we'll have plenty of time to-"

WHACK!

"Um, you were saying something?" Spider-Man taunted as Robbie slumped to the floor, a backhand to the head knocking out his clock about 20 years back. The red masked crusader began to bust out in a mocking jig celebration only to glare up and see our two resident sorceresses backing away quite slowly.

"Oh if it isn't the gothy girls. I appreciate the help back there." Spidey commented as his pupils were blood red. "I can see why Robin here got so distracted. It's like candy for the eyes isn't it?"

"Whoa, you think so huh?" Jinx smiled brightly, striking a Cosmo-girl pose.

"Oh yeah, you're hot." Spider-Man commented. "Especially for a stick girl."

"Aw, I-… wait a minute Hey!" Jinx was about to go lay the smack down only to be yanked back hard by Raven.

"Spider-Man, you got to listen to me. Don't let these emotions consume you. They're not real."

"Yada yada yada," Spider-Man chuckled. "You're so hot when you're playing the hero aren't you?"

"…"

"Heh, somebody has the hots for someone." Jinx tossed in her two cents only to get a harsh elbow to her shoulder. "Ow!"

"This isn't funny."

"Come on Raven," Spider-Man stood above X's body grabbing him by the cape. "You know it. You're a fox."

Raven blushed heavily, but at the same time was preparing herself to attack.

"I can just picture you now." Spidey closed his eyes making a dreamy look to the air. "In nothing but a two piece bikini on a steamy summer day… Yeah." Cue dreamy look, "I'm thinking it'd be… hot pink… and barely covering that bod of yours… wowie… totally rawr…"

"GAH!" Raven's eyes doubled in size. "Oh no you don't! You stop that right now!"

"Ugh what are you bitching about? I wish Venom would do this for me." Jinx pouted, growling as she crossed her arms. "That guy is such a jerk! Damn his cuteness to heck!"

"But anyway, I've got a job to finish." He lifted up X harshly by the cape. "Say nighty night Robin."

"Dammit, I have to snap him out of this." Raven's eyes glowed white, only in hesitation to attack her friend. "But I can't hurt him…"

"Ugh, can't you pull off some telekinetic jibber jabber? Do some of that uber magic of yours."

"No," Raven shook her head, both of them now against the wall. "With Blood's essence being this strong and then my direct influence, I conceivably could kill him. I can't take that chance."

"Ugh, why not?"

"…"

"Well if you're out of ideas, may I suggest we take off before your lover boy takes out your lead-"

"Lover boy," Raven whispered like a drone, staring out as if she was staring into the abyss.

"Uh, grumpy I-I-I was just joking, no need to freak out on me." Jinx blinked, being totally creeped out by Raven saying such words.

_Oh Azar I hope this works. _Raven thought dismally, then closing her eyes knowing what she was about to do.

"Jinx," Raven whispered. "When the coast is clear, you get Robin to safety. Got it?"

"What? Like I care-"

"Just do it!" Raven growled, Jinx instantly sighing as she really had no choice. With one last dramatic breath the sorceress from Azarath calmed herself. She needed it. What she was about to do was something that was just about as bad as it got… for her anyway.

"Oh Spider-Man," those gray lids opened slowly, that voice not as cold as it should have been. "What are you waiting for?"

"Huh?" Spider-Man instantly dropped a groaning and limp X to the floor, Jinx gasping nearly in unison at that fervent tone.

"You heard me," Raven's voice was oh so seductive. "Stop with this non-sense and come here."

Gulps.

"What in the world are you doing grumpy?" Jinx was in disbelief, Spider-Man sharing the same sentiments except the boy's eyes were more quirky then a jigsaw puzzle.

"Aw, you're not talking kinky anymore." Raven strutted over, that blue cloak seeming as if it should've been something more along the lines of green or pink. "What's the matter? Don't you want me?"

"I… uh," Spider-Man's jaw was about dragging on the floor, his whole body as frozen as a statue as the feeling of Raven's generous chest against his did that magic.

"Oh you're so cute." Raven placed a finger on his nose.

"I-I-I… am?" Spidey was actually sounding more like the Peter Parker we know and love by the second.

"Mmmhmm," The unreal Raven ran her finger down his nose, and to his chest. "Do you think I'm cute?"

"I… I… yea… I would… think so…" Those reddened eyes began to drain away.

Raven smirked, now bodying up against him, slowly turning so that her rear was all Spidey would be thinking about.

_Oh gawd. _Jinx thought in awe, picking up Robin and trying to yank him away. _This is something ya only get to see once in a lifetime._

"Ummm…" Spider-Man felt as if his inner temperature was about as hot as his good ol' buddy Johnny Storm's was, Raven's rear being right up against him.

"What's the matter? You don't like?"

Spider-Man just shook his head stupidly, suddenly watching as that blue cloak slipped off, draping to the floor neatly through telekinesis. Curves, curves, and more curves was all Spidey was seeing as Raven turned, those purple eyes staring straight into those masked eyes. He may have been possessed by some magic. But this guy was no fool!

"I've always wanted to do this." Raven whispered, the feeling of delicate hands pulling up that mask was intoxicating Spidey just as much as this tease.

"D-d-do what?" Spider-Man whispered as his mask reached his nose.

"This…"

"Oh lord," Jinx twitched, staring at the scene playing out in front of her.

Can we say bulging eyes, swelling lips, and airless lungs? Because those were the exact characteristics of Peter Parker right about now folks! Spider-Man literally went dead as a doornail, those gray lips pressing up against him. Kissing. The two were kissing, Raven not letting Peter even breath as he was squished between the cold wall and the warmest of bodies.

"Uuuugh," X groaned, seemingly regaining consciousness.

"Uh oh," Jinx gulped, looking over towards Raven. "Hey Raven stop that! He's waking up!"

"Mmmmm," Was her only reply, those two lip locking youngins apparently not being done.

"Oh come on! Isn't this city whacked out enough?" Jinx was beside herself. "I can only take so much dammit!"

Raven listened to the cry apparently, but it was not because of Jinx's pleading ways. She was simply out of breath, pulling away slowly as she stared at those lifeless masked eyes. Raven blushed, not believing what she just did, or what she had been doing, apparently this possession being even scarier than that four eyed one.

Spider-Man obviously was even more dumbfounded. A slump to the floor with dizzy eyes later confirmed it, and Raven just sighed heavily.

"T-that wasn't right." The voice was as deadpan as ever.

"You're telling me!" Jinx gasped. "You gave him one Hell of a smooch. W-was that even you?"

"Quiet," Raven got up, blushing as she levitated her cloak towards herself and wrapping it. "This never happened."

"W-what never happened?" The two girls heard, the kindly voice of our friendly neighborhood Peter Parker being a nifty chime to the ears.

"Spider-Man?" Raven looked down surprised, blinking.

"W-why does my head feel like it's been shoved in a blender?" Spidey groaned, rubbing his noggin'.

"Maybe that's because Raven shoved her tongue-"

Levitated trashcan lid to the head!

"Ow! DAMMIT!"

"Tongue… what?" Spider-Man turned.

"N-nothing." Raven gladly fibbed. "Glad to see that you're back… I didn't know that doing um… that… would make this happen."

"Okay, my head hurts enough. Talk to me slower please."

Raven chuckled as always inwardly, helping him up. "There's no time. We have to-"

"Whoooooooooooooooooooooa!"

**SWAP!**

"What the heck?" Spider-Man yelped, backing away only to see that black figure of nightmares splattered against the floor. "V-venom?"

"Ooooowie," The obsidian monster grimaced, laying limp against the asphalt. "We're so not winning are we?"

"Venny poo!"

"Oh God no…" A latch was all Venom received for his panic, his persistent admirer only adding to the injuries. _Why oh why did we have to land here?_

"Dude what is going on?" Spider-Man glared. "All I remember is…"

"That we're all totally screwed?" Venom shot back angrily , using his tendrils to place Jinx gently down as the girl just continued to admire him. "By the way, why you're immune to this pissed off epidemic-"

"He was cured." Jinx said calmly, going over to him and whispering a secret that probably should've been locked in a case forever.

"Oh hell no," Venom looked over to Raven and Spider-Man. "Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!"

"Okay what's so funny?" Spider-Man jumped in waving his hands as he saw Raven's face turn completely red. "Hello? Anyone care to fill me in? Or I could just act like a spastic psycho for the rest of the time?"

"Calm down Parker, you don't want to know. Because if you did? Your girlfriend there would have to kill you." Venom suddenly looked to the air. "Besides, our offspring should be dropping in anytime now… 3… 2… 1…"

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

**SPLAT!**

"Huh, we're guessing that fight didn't go too well for you either." Venom assumed as his kin slid down the wall slowly, Carnage's eyes doing quite the impression of one of those hypnotizing mirrors.

"Carnage!" Jinx gasped, shaking him. "You okay hun?"

"Nai nai… bu…" Was all that was said in an anime chibi tone. Jinx just sighed as she suddenly gave him the whap of the century.

WHAP!

"Gah!" Carnage yelped, quickly shaking back into his somewhat barely sane self. "Jeez that hurt!"

"Carnage you're alright!" Jinx celebrated.

"Well whoopty doo." Raven commented. "This whole city's gone crazy and we're celebrating his well being?"

"Sheesh someone's a grumpy guss." Carnage rolled his eyes.

"Ugh, this is so bad." Raven turned away from the group. "This can't get any worse."

"Hah! You think this is bad?" Venom laughed in amusement. "Just wait a little while witch. This pandemic is only going to get worse and worse and worse."

"W-what?" Raven's curiosity was perked in more ways then one. "What are you talking about?"

"Heh, we're surprised you can't sense it." Venom crossed his arms. "Brother Blood's and Toxin's bond is getting stronger by the minute. Soon this aura of madness will spread farther then your city limits. Much much further."

"Just how far are you saying?"

"Oh we don't know… let's see… multiply the mean… carry over the one… divide the sum by its square root…" Venom began counting with a mass amount of pseudo-fingers quite mockingly. "About the entire world… give or take."

"But t-that's impossible!"

"No it isn't!" Carnage interrupted. "I saw this Armageddon stuff in a movie once! Have any of you seen Armageddon?"

Blinks.

"Well this is just like that isn't it pops? Big comet smacking into the world and everything blows up right?"

"N-not exactly… no..."

"Um, then it has to be an aliens invading and blowing up the world apart type Armageddon eh?"

"You can't be serious."

"T-then is it a Unicron is coming and we need the power of the Matrix to save the world Transformer's style Armageddon?"

"What the Hell?"

"Then it's a we drive mechs that aren't really mechs and are part of a theological web that will confuse the shit out of you Evangelion Armageddon!"

"Dude, just give it up!"

"Oh! It's a Frieza has all the Dragon Balls and Goku is the only one that can save us Armageddon!"

"…"

"Or is it a Jinx told me that Ms. Ice Queen here smooched Parker and Hell is freezing over Armageddon?"

"Huah? S-say what?" Spider-Man gasped.

"J-j-just… shut up!" Raven pointed towards our two favorite symbiotes, changing the subject quite quickly. "This is all your fault! You two made this mess and you two are going to help stop this!"

"Oh, let's just play the blame the serial killer game again!" Cassidy scowled. "Sorry babe, we don't take orders from anyone! Besides, you think I'd help the good guys? Hah! I'll never-"

"Don't mind our offspring." Venom smirked. "We'll help out."

"SAY WHAT POPS?"

"Buuuut," Venom paused. "Just so you aren't getting the wrong ideas. Watching Blood achieve these heights of power is such an ego-killer to us. We're in this for our pride and our pride alone got it?"

"Well that's nice to know." Raven's sarcasm rang like a chime, suddenly the girl manifesting that mirror to her mind again. "I don't trust any of you H.I.V.E. but we're the only ones that can stop Blood."

"Uh, so I'm playing the good guy now?" Carnage gasped, feeling as if he was about to burst into hysteria. "What the hell has happened to me? I mean-" he suddenly noticed Raven's mirror. "Oh neat-o mirror!" He grabbed it and began pulling at his red pseudopodia as he stared at his reflection. "I was having such a bad symbiote-skin day today… sheeesh,"

Raven just blinked totally perturbed, turning towards Venom who just simply shrugged.

"Why we're related we'll never know."

"Oh it's quite simple gramps… it's because our family ties doesn't really mean a thing."

_Crap, crap, and mega crap! w_as the elegant summary of the thoughts that instantly ran into the minds of our lone group of antagonists. The teens looked up to see our spiffy yet horrific Blood, only looking to become uglier and uglier as time went by. Raven ripped the mirror out of Carnage's hand and stared at the symbiotic figure above with that look of Rocky Balboa determination except a lot more attractive looking.

"It's time we finish this…"

"Oh something's going to be finished my cute little demon." Blood grinned as he drooled liquid that made his name oh so intimidating. "And that something is going to be the entire human race."

"Aw that sounds spiffy alright," Carnage waved. "But before we start fighting each other can we all have a 30 minute break?"

"Uh, why the heck do you need a 30 minute break?" Spider-Man grumbled.

"Dude! Come on! The season finale of ER is on right now! Everyone knows that!"

"…"

"Um if you kill anyone first can it please be him?" Venom pointed.

"I second that." Spider-Man added.

"Ooookay fine fine fine," Carnage sighed as he got in a lazy fighting stance. "Never mind… jeez…"

"Heh-heh-heh, it's really been nice knowing you all." Blood hissed as he began to glow like a living fireball. "Let the blood sacrifice begin…"

"Um I don't consider myself a genius or anything." Jinx sighed as she looked around. "But I think we should run… no?"

Good idea Jinx… good idea…

- ! -

(The blitzy sound of cheesy anime music and a next episode montage plays!)

_Spider-Man: Hey hey hey everyone! This is your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man speaking! Boy, are we in a troublesome spot! Me and the Titans have had a blast so far kicking butt but now It's heading down to the wire and it ain't looking too good! With a new enemy on the horizon and me and Raven being forced to team up with our worst enemies can we even think about pulling through this? I think so! But Brother Blood and Toxin have other ideas… Find out this and more on the next and last episode of…_

_BB: Gah! Dude, this is so unfair! I wanted to do the hyper-active preview summary for the next episode!_

_Spider-Man: Ugh, well I'm sorry man, but I got the mic first and first come first serve._

_BB: So? I can do it way better than you can! Let me re-do it!_

_Spider-Man: Yeah right! Not a chance!_

_Carnage: Hah you so-called heroes are hilarious. Neither of you can do a decent anime preview if your lives depended on it!_

_Spider-Man: Oh, and you can Cletus?_

_Carnage: Hey! Don't you ever flippin' call me that! And I can sure do a lot better than you nerd boy! It's a symbiote's job to do!_

_BB: Dream on! I'm so going to do the preview over-dubs!_

_Jinx: Oh get over yourselves fellas, can't we just leave it be? Bug boy already did the preview. It's over._

_Carnage and BB: NO IT ISN'T!_

_Jinx: Boys are such weird creatures… why don't you guys rock paper scissors it?_

_Carnage: Okay! Rock paper scissors! I'm all three! I win! I'm doing the voice over!_

_BB: Dude what the heck? That was unfair!_

_(Scuffles)_

_Spider-Man: Uh, anyway (turns away from our arguing characters) … See you guys next time on the next episode of Arachno-_

_Carnage: GIVE ME THAT MIC OR DIE PARKER!_

_Spider-Man: GAH!_


	12. The Punchline

Let's be honest here for one second. We've all heard this comment from tons of people. From loved ones, to accepted family members, to arch enemies… Heck, from people you've never met before in your life! It seems to be one of the criteria of living in this crazy thing called life.

Three words in this exact order:

**GO TO HELL!**

And being the natural born adventurers we are, I think we should toss our pride aside, and give those people what they want! So here you go friends! Here's a ticket to the hottest plane of existence known to the living world. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you…

The fiery fate of evil!

The darkest depth of destruction!

The super-sized sauna of suffering!

I simply give you… Hell…

"This is an outrage!" A voice rumbled throughout said place, fire and brimstone shooting out from flaming geysers. "Demons of the darkness! Report at once!"

Oh boy Trigon was mad. And sure, Mr. Devil was always mad. But today, he was extra agitated. The deadline for the End of the World was coming. And his servant of the Prophecy wasn't here for this really really really important meeting.

"Sir yes sir!" A group of elite demonic soldiers yelled clumsily with their flaming heads sparkling like torches in the night.

"Where's Slade?" Their four eyed master yelled from the skies.

"We… uh, we… can't seem to find him…" His demons replied, shaking wildly in fear.

Thank goodness Demons do not have to do the unpleasant business no?

An impatient tapping came from above. "Come on! You Incubi and Succubae can find that perfect little helpless victim? But you can't find a freakin' one eyed skeleton warrior with black and gold armor?"

"…"

"You're all pathetic!" Trigon sighed, those eyes in the skies deflating. "You know how embarrassing it is? God's angels are at worst competent. You all can't even match that! Ugh, help is so hard to find these days."

"Tell me about it 'master'." A certain one eyed someone answered from afar. "Try finding mortal apprentices why don't you?"

"Slade!" Trigon spazzed, his eyes strolling across the firey plane. "You're late!"

"All apologies evil one," His voice had more sarcasm then a Jim Carrey movie had laughs. "But Hell is just so pleasant. I needed to walk around and admire the view."

"The view?" Trigon smirked. "Speaking of which, the seventh ring needs a little work doesn't it?"

"I'd say so," Slade shoved the demons aside like trash. "Maybe some more torture holes? Oh and by the way, that doubling of human skeletons was a nice touch in the sacrificial pit."

"Why thank you very much," Trigon suddenly took his dark human form, seeping out of the dirt ground. "You know Slade some people just don't appreciate beings with great decorating tastes. Ya know back in the day I used to decorate… Hey, wait a sec!" Those four eyes glared red. "Silence! Stop changing the subject! The time of mortals is-"

"Is at an end, yada yada yada. I got it the first fifty times." Slade sat upon a firey chair nearby, opening up a "The Abyss Bugle" Newspaper and reading with a leg draped over the knee.

Slade's arrogance was unmatched. Even Satan was getting annoyed.

"Don't worry. Everything is going according to plan." Slade reassured. "As you said, your gem's little birthday is arriving soon. And I memorized all my cryptic lines you told me to remember, and I've even burned that lame S on my forehead."

"Lame S?" Trigon gasped. "That took along time for me to design!"

"Not impressed."

"Oh come on! S for Slade! S for Scath! S for Satan! S for… uh… Super Powerful Demonic guy!"

"…"

"Okay fine, it's a bit uninspired." Trigon admitted. "But just wait till you see my grand finale. That will be the most original apocalypse you will ever see!"

"Original?" Slade questioned as his one eyed glare peeped up. "Are you talking about the flaming meteors? The hoards of demons? Or the lava oceans you're going to create?"

"… It's that predictable?"

Nods.

"Okay servant, I guess it is back to the drawing board. We need something totally-"

"Ahem," Another voice interrupted from across the room. This one wasn't as nearly as unpleasant as these two incarnations of pure evil.

"I do hope I'm not bothering you two on such _important_ matters."

"Arella darling!" Trigon was elated at the presence of his wife, all be it former lover. "How nice of you to join-"

"Save it fool," The mother of our dearest Raven walked into the room, her pure heavenly white attire clashing with everything else inside this Hellhole. "I am surprised you both are so calm about all this."

"Of course I'm calm!" Trigon walked over to her. "The world is ending soon dear. What I've been planning-"

"No you nitwit." Arella crossed her arms. "Your 'gem', my daughter, and the world that you so desperately want to take back in an over dramatic fashion is in peril."

"My, that was a mouthful." Slade muttered, reading his newspaper.

"Just go back to reading vermin." Arella ignored him.

Slade sighed, "And now would be the perfect time to say, 'You didn't say that last night-'"

SLAP! The masked man was now upside down, plowed into the ground headfirst like a golf tee from some well-timed Azarian magic.

"Last night?" Ze Devil squirmed. "Oh Arella please don't tell me-"

"Don't you hear me? Raven is in trouble!"

"Oh pish tosh!" Trigon shrugged. "Our daughter is plenty capable of taking care of her own hide. She's got my genes! Whatever this problem is? She'll take care of it."

"You have no idea what's happening do you?" Arella rolled her eyes. "So typical. Always so self-absorbed! Just use your demonic powers to see exactly what's happening and I assure you… you won't be as calm."

"Huh…"

(Five Minutes Later)

"Gah!" Trigon's quad group of eyes bulged. "Superman against Wonder Woman? Flash against Lantern? This, this is brilliant! Too brilliant even! I hate this! Who are these buffoons that look like arachnid aliens? I mean these villains aren't even of this plain of existence!"

"They are obviously interdimensional intruders brought here by shabby plot writing." Slade muttered.

"Oh…" Trigon blinked. "W-wait a sec, shabby plot writing?"

"Never mind that is irrelevant." Mr. Wilson wisely stopped. "The world is tearing itself apart. Soon there won't be much to take over... master."

"Exactly," Arella cut her empathic visions towards the two evil men. "And I know you wouldn't want that now would you _dear_?"

"You're right." Trigon pounded his fist. "No one shows me up! I've worked too hard to get everything into place. Slade you must keep an eye on my-"

"I'm already on it 'master'." Slade sat up in compliance, cracking his neck as he began to walk out of the room. "The gem will be safe… for now."

"There you go. That's the spirit!" Trigon bellowed, suddenly turning to Arella and taking her hand. "So, while my servant goes to take care of our daughter. Why don't you and I go on a nice stroll-"

SLAP!

"I'm leaving." Arella left her own mark on Lucifer himself, the demon blankly staring as the feisty woman with little emotion left.

"Ugh, my daughter and my wife are way too alike." Trigon rubbed his cheek.

"She is quite… the handful." Slade finished with one of those suggestive chuckles, smirking as he began to fade out of Hell. The Devil already knew the inclinations of that statement.

"Grrr, I can't wait to double cross that bastard." Trigon roared, noticing a hoard of demons watching the spectacle. "And why are you peons standing around! Don't you have souls to torture! MOVE IT!"

"GAH! YES SIR!" The demons tripped and tumbled their way back to their posts.

"… Note to self…" Trigon sighed, "Next time you make demons? Make them while you're not watching Looney Toons…"

- Arach –

And now it is the song fic portion of our story:

"Enter Badman"

Say your prayers, Raven's done!  
Don't forget Venom's son!  
Carnage is just way too damn fun!

Blood cuts you in! Deep within!  
Carnage's little kin!  
Until the World is undone!

Sleep with one eye open! (Like Slade!)  
Gripping your bird-a-rang tight! (Like Robin!)

Exit Light!  
Enter Night!  
Ain't my lyrics a sore?  
Hah! We're off to Never **Nevermore**!

Hahahaha!

_-- _JB-tallica

( Nevermore )

"Oh noes!" Brave yelped as she was jumping up and down frantically pogo stick style. The green hooded spirit tossed her large bag of potato chips aside, sighing at what she was watching on her mental television set. The live feed of every one of Raven's friends getting their butts kicked being her pet peeve of the moment. Big pet peeve!

"This totally sucks!" Brave kicked the TV set, the monitor blowing up into smithereens. "We got to do something!"

"Chill out green," Burp! Went Gross's belch, "What can we do?" The orange hooded Raven laid back. "We're all gonna die anyway, so let's at least go out with some dignity k?"

"You are so lame." Brave pointed angrily. "We can do something if Raven just let us dammit!"

"But she did let you silly!" Happy said, laying on the couch upside down, so the 'blood' could rush to her head. "She let you kiss Spider-Man…" the pink one suddenly pouted. "Totally unfair!"

"You're probably a horrible kisser." Gross made a scowling face. "That's why it knocked him back to his senses!"

"…"

"Everyone is hurting…" Timid whispered from her corner, sitting coiled up. "Everyone's scared…"

"…. And let the submissive clear up everything for us." Brave moped while clenching her teeth in frustration.

"Calm yourself Sister Bravery." Smart adjusted her glasses while reading. "While it is true that Raven successfully used your spirit to snap Spider-Man out of the spell. I do not believe she has the confidence to unleash us all at once. The risk is too potent."

"Risk?" Brave gasped. "What risk? That Blood guy is going to tear this whole world apart anyway! We need to act and we need to act now!"

"Yay! I love acting! I wanna be Drew Barrymore in Charlie's Angels!" Happy pointed to Timid. "You can be Cameron Diaz and Smart can be Lucy Liu!"

Pause…

Pause…

One more… pause…

"Um," Gross suddenly shoved Happy off to the side quite 'happily'. "Look Rambo Raven, we can't just have that 'run into the room and mow everyone down with RCP 9000 mentality. As much as we all want to help-"

"Speak for yourselves." The dark red Raven muttered in her chains, whistling something that sounded like that Mr. Rogers theme. It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood… a beautiful day in the… in the… yada yada yada… I don't remember the rest. That show was creepy anyway.

"Fine, as much as MOST of us want to help." Gross corrected. "We can't! If Raven slips up once with all of us on the outside? Daddy and the Demon Club are going to have a field day with everyone on Earth. And wouldn't that be peachy?"

"I know… I know… I know!" Brave slammed her fist down against the table. "But this isn't right! We can't just sit back while Robin, Spidey, and the gang get their asses kicked! It just… wouldn't be right."

"I want to help as well." Timid whispered. "I don't like seeing _him _or our friends in pain."

"Very admirable sister," Smart smiled in support.

"That's it! Come on! Even little Ms. Scaredy pants wants to help! If Raven doesn't get her act together we'll all be helpless!"

"I know." Someone new entered the astral room. "And that's why I've decided, that I do need all of your help this time."

The spirits all turned, being as surprised as anyone.

"Finally…" Brave growled. "Now let's go kick some ass!"

- Arach -

What do you get when you mix an immature yet powerful symbiote and an evil man with a bloodline that was destined to rule the world?

Well, you get… you get…

_Silence…_

Dammit what do you get again? I swore I knew this answer. Anybody have an idea?

"_AACK!" was the sound of Venom getting slammed through four walls of reinforced concrete._

Jeez man, don't you hate it when you forget these things? It's like right in your head, but it just won't get out! Seriously it's like so annoy-

"IT'S BLOOD AND TOXIN YOU MORON!" Venom screamed, grumbling as he was trying to get up.

Oh right! Hehe, thanks man. I owe you one.

"Idiot..." Venom began dusting himself off, "Now if you excuse us. We have a little family-" The half-man half creature turned. _Wait a minute, who were we just talking to?_

Teehee.

"This is strange…" Venom just stopped in his tracks. He could sense it easily. Swooping down from about 10 stories up was a blazing red fireball, once impacting the ground making a little shockwave and back draft that would make Trigon's inferno blasts proud.

After an explosion of meteoric consequences, the inferno died. There was complete silence, the projectiles hurler floating down to the little coffee shop glaring around. Brother Blood was getting uglier by the second. Do we got a plastic surgeon in the house?

"BBQ'd symbiote." Sebastian chuckled as his costume was flailing all over like a blood clot that just wouldn't dry up. "Oh stop this Venom. Toxin and I know you're still good for a fight."

"Ugh and we know you grandkids are so overrated!" At that very instant the room just littered black, red tendrils soon joining the fray, a massive wall of pseudopodia tentacles wrapping around each other as Venom just Ray Lewis tackled Blood through the glass wall. The two tumbled out to the streets, the obsidian one of the pair flailing away with punches left and right as he mounted above.

"Rule 101 in the fight Venom book coming to a Barnes and Noble's near you," Venom continued to bash away as their tendrils coiled. "Don't piss us off!"

POW! POW! POW! The clenched punches landed with solid results, Blood's face being the bruised victim every time. But something was wrong. People weren't supposed to smile getting a beating like this. Were they?

"What the hell?" Venom stopped, gruesome mouth and tongue wide agape.

"Aw! Why are you stopping?" Blood's head seemed to have done a complete 360, his neck cracking a bit as Venom found his entire body being wrapped with Toxin's skin. "That was so fun! Here… why don't we show you!"

"GAAAAAAH!" Venom felt it. A grab of that long nasty tongue and Eddie and Venom knew they were in trouble. Around and around and around went Venom, his tongue being used as the pivot for a Venom-go-round. Blood was relentless, doing a good Kid Flash impression of a tornado as he launched Venom off, his predecessor slamming into the ground a few times before hitting into the 'soft' confines of a steel convoy.

Blood chuckled as his symbiote mask coiled around his face again. "Anyone else?"

"Oh we're not done yet junior!" Blood heard the voice but it was too late, as Carnage kicked the hellish kid against the jawbone. The momentum of the strike wasn't your daddy's momentum, Blood stumbling back as it was only his tendrils that held him up.

"Someone just got owned! Tell me again Toxin cause I got a bad memory…"

(Waits…)

"WHO'S YO DADDY?" Carnage smirked in celebration, axes forming on the hands.

"You really are the loudmouth aren't you?" Blood forced his head back into its socket, suddenly a few heads of beast like properties erupting from the pseudopodia.

"_You're washed up pops." _The Toxin heads chuckled. _"You're old news. Yesterday's paper! Dick Clark! N'sync! American Idol!"_

"Ugh, and you think you're so fresh?" Carnage nodded back and fourth amused. "Sometimes the older the better kiddo! Ya ever heard of Van Halen? Or Aerosmith? Heck, I combine the old school and the new school homie!"

"Nah," Blood hissed. "You combine idiocy with red-neck psychosis."

"… That too… but guess what?" Carnage suddenly formed. "I think someone here needs a damn timeout!"

Spinning blades were tossed effortlessly, cutting through the air as easy as pie. The way Blood actually caught those projectiles with a ball of energy even looked easier. Carnage was impressed. Scared yes… but a little impressed.

"Wow," The hick of a villain sighed. "That was pretty cool… like… The Fonz cool…"

"Thanks, now for an encore!" Blood did as he said, tossing the red slicer-rangs back at twice the speed of Carnage, causing Cletus to hit the deck. Cassidy scowled slamming his fist into the ground angrily as he was eating dirt.

"I am not going to be embarrassed by some second rate symbiote!"

"Well sorry to say this Carnage," the voice he hated so much landed down beside him. "But you're being embarrassed. By the way… some second rate symbiote? Wow that's a tongue twister."

"Oh shut up Parker."

"Heh-heh, Spider-Man." Blood mused. "Toxin informs me that you're quite the hero back in your universe."

"Oh really? Well did he inform you that you're going to be stopped pretty soon, just like every other villain that tries to destroy the world?" Peter shot back.

"And exactly who's going to stop me?" Blood was ecstatic. "The Justice League? You three? Don't make me laugh! HA! HA!"

"I'll make you laugh whenever I want arseface!" Carnage scowled. "Knock knock! Who's there? Blood! Blood who? Bloody Hell I suck! Cause I'm Toxin!"

Chirp?

"Uh five words Carnage," Spider-Man was in awe of the lameness. "What the heck was that?"

"Psh, don't be insulting because you're jealous of my jokes." Carnage gave a victorious arm pump.

Spider-Man was about to reply, Carnage probably soon after with a witty comment. Too bad the pain of being bashed across the body with a tendril whip the size of a bus stopped it all. Ouch people… ouch.

"Did you really have to piss him off more?" Spider-Man grimaced, so winded he felt like floating away with the breeze. "And if you had to, could you have at least made the joke worth while?"

"Hey, pissing people off with semi-credible jokes?" Carnage shook his consciousness back to full. "You do it all the time!"

"Yea but mine aren't as lame as yours!"

"Yea right!"

"Cripes shut the Hell up you two." Venom fumed at his teammates from behind, looking like a total wreck. Carnage and Spider-Man could only blink at him as Venom began wrapping up his tongue back into his mouth.

"Speaking of tongue twisters…" Spider-Man mused. "Yo Venom uh…"

"J-just don't ask…"

"Well then I'll ask this dad." Carnage crossed his arms. "Can we stop getting our butts kicked now? We can so take this guy!"

"No we can't." Venom muttered, peering over to see Blood tapping his feet as if he was letting them have their meeting.

"Of course we-"

"Venom's right… ugh," Spider-Man hated admitting that. "This solo attack stuff isn't working."

"You're such a wimp." Carnage poked Spidey harshly on the shoulder. "You've beaten us by yourself plenty of times! And you're definitely not stronger! How do you do it?"

"I um… well… I just kinda wait till you beat yourselves up by either being way too obsessed," points to Venom, "or insane…" points to Carnage.

Venom and Carnage: "Huh…"

"But that won't work against this guy." Spider-Man got up. "We have to work together."

"Together?" Carnage blinked. "Together as in uh? Partridge Family together? Or like G.I. Joe together?"

"And what's that supposed to mean!" Spider-Man was in disbelief.

"I dunno…" Carnage chuckled.

_You ask for some help and God gives you THIS…_

"Why don't we just hold hands and sing Kumbaya?" Venom growled. "No way! We've partnered with you one too many times Parker. Save it."

"We have no choice." Spidey replied. "You're unofficially on my side anyway. Let's start acting like a damn team."

"Yeah! We can call ourselves the Arachnid Assault!" Carnage chuckled. "That's an awesome name."

Spider-Man and Venom: "…"

"What? Like you two can come up with anything better!"

"Look you numbskulls, Raven need us to stall for time." Spider-Man pointed out. "We don't need to beat him. But if we don't work together we'll be dead before-"

"We got'cha," Venom sighed depressingly, turning. "Ugh so what's the plan?"

Carnage hissed. "May I suggest we rip Toxin into shreds and have him for dinner?"

"Uh no thanks." Spider-Man shook his head. "I hear you symbiotes have way too many carbs and I'm on that Atkins diet."

"…"

"What? It's not easy fitting into this spider tights okay?" Spider-Man grabbed the two in a huddle.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, fellas!" Blood suddenly floated above them. "I can tell you your plan right now. It's brilliant!"

"Hah! Like you'd know our plan!" Carnage pointed and jeered.

"You're going to run for your stinkin' lives!" The child of the new Symbiote age suddenly flared up red, three tentacles armed with jaws with bleeding teeth sprouting out.

"Okay… huh," Carnage threw his mega tantrum. "That was so a lucky guess!"

- Arach –

A few blocks away…

"Stand and keep guard Jinx. I'll be back soon." The Hex Princess mocked her gray skinned counterpart perfectly, all the way down to that cute scowl. Staring at that stupid mirror that Raven had left her with after she had assimilated with it was only making Jinx fume some more.

"Grrrrr, you said you'd be back by now!"

What a poor and sad widdle girl. Jinx may have been one bad apple. But if anyone was watching their friends' get their tails handed to them for a good while like she has, you'd feel sorry for that person too! Uh huh! Don't give me that head shake! Stop that! Now!

"Ugh…" Scuffling back and fourth, she continued to wait. "Oh when you get back here Raven you are so getting a scolding! And I'm going to hex you with a bad hair day every morning you wake up! The nerve! Leaving me here and forcing me to watch my Venny Poo get hurt!"

"Oh shut your trap pinkness!"

"W-wha?" Jinx blinked stupidly as suddenly a black energy was shooting out from ze mirror, the girl being covered in the glow. _Just when things couldn't get any weirder…_

"Gah! Finally I'm out!" One of the energies formed into our bravest Raven spirit.

The other Raven's followed swiftly. "So this is what the world looks like!" Happy giggled. "Yay sisters we made it! Raven finally let us out! Woohoo!" she glomped a few of her fellow Raven's, before turning to a startled Jinx.

"You are Jinx! OMG your hair is pink! That's too cool!"

Jinx scratched her head.

Scratch.

Scratch.

Blink.

Sigh.

"I officially need mental help don't I?"

.. Apparently crushing on Venom isn't enough of an indication.

"Excuse us Jinx," Smart stepped in. "But we need to act as swiftly as possible." She took the mirror out of those skinny hands, turning to the one true and blue Raven.

"You'll need this."

"Of course," Raven just nodded, looking at all her emotional states with a worried look. What our favorite Azarian was doing could be officially the carrying out of the End of the World. Even then, she had to take it as a constellation pain. This definitely wasn't as bad as letting Brave take over her body. Her lips were still tingling.

"What are we waiting for? Come on! Let's go save our buds!" Brave pounded her fist. "Spidey is going to love us so much after this! I know it!"

Raven ignored that comment like a driver would a speed limit sign. It was too late to back up now. And risk is all part of the reward. It was put up or shut up time.

"… Raven," Jinx poked her. "What's going on?"

Shut up time!

"Uh… long story…"

"You know what?" Jinx shook her head. "Never mind girl, just go save the world now please. My friends need your help!"

"I'll give it a try."

"Alright! We're all here Cap'n! Give us the word and we're off!" Brave got into army stance, saluting, Happy doing so too except looking totally inept. The emotional shadows all stared at their true self waiting for the cue.

"Um, before we go through with this." Gross sighed. "If the world does blow up… can we like uh, not go with it?"

The rest of the Ravens just stared. "…"

"Right, let's just do it." Gross smiled as large as Happy just to save her own hide.

"Azarath… Azarath… AZARATH!" As Raven's eyes glowed white, and the emotions felt their energies all combine. Timid, Happy, Brave and the gang were all merging into Raven, forming into the spiritual being that took out her Father's influence. Her soul self erupted in a flash of light, Jinx staring on in amazement as soon only a Raven dressed completely in white with long purple hair stood strong.

The world didn't blow up! Yay!

"Wow… that's really uh… sparkly grumpy," Jinx commented dryly, only to smile brightly. "Nice color change! I like it!"

Before _this _complete Raven could even reply, they heard noises from afar. Apparently BB and Starfire along with any super power in Jump City were at each other's throats. This had to change.

"Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos…" Raven muttered under her breath, suddenly a white aura beginning to flow from within her. The red energy that was flooding the skies was being dissipated, the white angelic light taking out the crimson trashy air. Passive empathy was totally owning the aggression!

"It's working?" Jinx looked out, seeing people actually becoming sane again. She clenched her fist. "Raven! You're doing it!"

Just as the whole city was brightening up, a presence just filled the area, Jinx and Raven feeling it as they turned. A tall man stood before them, **one **eye glowing as bright as the sun. Does Slade know how to make an entrance or what? Don't say or what!

"Hello there." Mr. Wilson said all too neighborly. "My Raven, haven't you've grown into your own."

The White Raven stared down Slade, noticing that burning S on his head. "Slade…"

"Slade? But isn't he dead? WHAT THE HELL?" Jinx seriously wanted to faint from this headache of a situation.

"The Hell with 7 rings Jinx," Slade smirked. "Speaking of which, your father really didn't like sending me out so early. It's how many days to your birthday again?"

Raven just stared at him, ready to blast him to kingdom come if necessary.

"Oh calm down." Slade sensed the friction. "You have bigger problems apparently. And if I were you, I would take into account that just because you have defeated his mind control, that doesn't mean you can defeat him."

"So what? My father sent you down here for help?" Raven growled.

"More like for advice." Slade replied indifferently. The rest of the world has Ms. Cleo. Raven had Mr. Trigon.

"You see, without you or this world. Trigon would have no meaning. So I'm now your guardian… angel. So to speak…"

"…"

"You know that even in this form you cannot defeat Blood." Slade walked out, sensing the power house of a villain nearby. "You'll need more."

Raven blinked. She stared at her hands, knowing Slade was partially correct. He was always PARTIALLY correct. Just like how BB was always TOTALLY incorrect.

"You have the gift of being born beyond mortals." The masked man whispered. "For the love of all that is alive can you please use it?"

Four glowing eyes were now present in the mirror.

"Jeez you Titans sometimes," Slade hit his mask. "I swear if I wasn't around you'd all be so unprepared for this life."

"I don't have a choice do I?" Raven whispered.

"Fate doesn't allow it." Slade answered. "Just like how you have to answer in a question form in Jeopardy. It's annoying… yes, but it must be done that way. So we can all feel so special…"

"…"

"Your demonic side is your power." The masked man said.

"Demonic?" Jinx made the most twisted face she had ever done, staring at Raven. "What the… heck are you?"

"Satan's spawn." Slade answered for Raven, doing that evil chuckle that seemed to echo like he was on Mt. Everest.

Jinx spasmed. "Satan's spawn? The SATAN?"

"…"

"WHAT THE HECK?" Jinx's horn hair went even more psycho. "Why didn't you tell me? I… I would've… not messed with you…"

CRAAAAAASH!

"Gah!" Jinx suddenly blurted out, tossing all questions away after seeing some trouble from afar. "Venny Poo!" She didn't even think about it, running off towards her friends. "I'm coming my lover!"

"Infatuations with beings named Venny Poo," Slade pondered. "Very interesting…"

"You're right." Raven interrupted, sensing Blood heading closer. "I have to use everything I got."

Four Red Eyes!

Four Red Eyes!

"Everybody I have."

"Well duh I'm right, I'm freakin' Slade!" Mr. Wilson hmph'd.

And now as the late and great Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers would say it!

IT'S DEMON TIME!

- Arach -

They decided to split up. The Arachnid Avengers, the Spider Clan, or as Carnage dubbed them "Run VSC" had decided to take off in their own routes to dodge Toxin's super jaw faced tentacle attack. The natural born hero of the three was now soaring through the sky like he did in his NYC days, moving at the speed of light! Okay, maybe not that but it was fast! I'm just trying to make a point!

_Move it Spidey! _A loud snap later and those symbiotic jaws nearly got to his rear end. "Gah! FASTER!" Spider-Man thought fast, grabbing the webline and propelling himself upward into another building. He did it so quickly, the tentacle couldn't pull up, bashing through the building underneath our hero.

"Whew," Spider-Man sensed something, now darting to his right as another tendril had its eyes on him.

"_SPIDER SNACK!" _The snake hissed.

"Sorry Parker! Guess it likes you more." Carnage laughed it up, adhesive palms against the very same building Spidey was on.

"Cassidy! We said to split up so the tendrils couldn't get to us all at once!"

"Oh right,' Carnage shrugged. "I guess I don't listen to instructions well. You know, being how UNSTABLE I am."

"Typical…"

"What the Hell?" Venom suddenly peeped over the edge of the building. "Why the heck are you two here?"

"See dad messed up too! He didn't know we were supposed to split up!"

"We knew we were supposed to do that you moron! We found this building first!"

"I don't see your name written on it!" Carnage spat.

"Don't make us use your blood to do it…"

"Grrr…"

"Get on the same page!" Spider-Man yelled.

It was really hopeless. I mean winning the Lotto seemed like a better reality then getting these three working as a team. And if a trio of hydra looking tendrils couldn't do it, what could?

Yawn. "And I really thought you three could at least make me break a sweat." Blood suddenly rose from the ground itself.

"_Me and Sebs knew you three sucked but this is just embarrassing."_ The Toxin heads chuckled at their insults.

Insults…

_Insults!_

Venom, Carnage, and Spider-Man looked at one another, hitting themselves for not realizing their one advantage. It was time to pull out their most secret weapon! Their Doctorate Degrees in Smack Talk.

"Ya know I'm just curious." Spider-Man scratched his masked head. "But is that real blood seeping out of your mouth? Because, I mean unless you ate something, that would be just impossible."

"Huh?"

"Hmm good call Parker." Venom pointed. "Is that your own blood? No way! That's too cool for a nerd like you Toxin."

"W-wha? It is real blood you simpletons!" Blood flared up angrily.

"Yea right!" Carnage pointed. "It's probably some blood capsules or something. Or better yet it's watered down Ketchup isn't it?"

"Ketchup!"

"Awww poor Blood and Toxin wuv their ketchup." Venom sighed mockingly. "Want daddy Carnage to feed you French fries too?"

"Yea sonny! I'll chop it up in widdle bitty pieces and make Spider-Man here scoop it all in that mouth." Carnage began laughing manically.

"STOP IT!" Blood yelled out.

"Seriously Blood you're not like Venom and Carnage are ya?" Spider-Man began to lean back against the wall. "All this over the top end of the world stuff is just a smoke screen, for that little kid inside! Begging for some Disney cartoons and sugar cereal isn't it?"

"I'm not hearing this!" Blood began to fume.

"Oh and now my son is throwing his first tantrum!" Carnage clapped. "Daddy is so proud! Want me to buy you a happy meal too?"

Blood was now redder then he was before, a vein pumping on his forehead. Ticked off, seeing red, angry like heck, say what you will. But his swagger was out as much as disco is these days. That is until…

"I'm going to tear you all-" Blood suddenly stopped, calming himself as his senses came to him. "You… sly dogs." He began to laugh a little.

"Dammit," Venom felt it too, Carnage soon following. Raven's essence was passing through the city. Their cover was blown.

"Parker, it's time to take him out before he gets to your woman!"

"Say what?"

"TAKE HIM DOWN!" Venom suddenly lassoed Blood around his waist with webbing. Spider-Man and Carnage fired off their own lines, all of them coiling up Sebastian quite nicely.

"Hah! We caught-"

SPLAT!

SPLAT!

SPLAT!

"You three are so annoying." Blood hissed, his hand glowing with the energy of like 100 stars. "Shutting all of you up will be way more satisfying then leeching off this Earth."

Venom was in his sights, that glaring palm pointing right at the sprawling anti-hero. Eddie looked up, white eyes bulging out as soon a sphere of total chaos was sent at him. It was too late for him to move. It looked like the tongued menace had eaten his last brain two nights ago.

But the explosion never came…

"J-jinx?" Venom muttered as he turned, seeing the sorceress countering with her own wave of carnation energy. The blasts battled, Blood's easily beginning to over-take Jinx's output.

"Girl is you crazy?" Venom gasped. "Get out of here!"

"N-no!" Jinx grimaced under the stress, her body giving out quicker then a dead light bulb. "Get to safety Venny!"

"W-what?" Venom shook his head, not believing this girl would do something this noble for him. Eddie was past his villainous antics, getting up as quickly as possible. "Not without you! Let's go!"

Jinx was about to be incinerated only to be pulled back by a web-line. Exhausted she fell into Venom's arms, Eddie swooping down to the ground as the entire building was ignited in one blast. Eddie hit the ground cleanly, Olympic judges would've given him 10's.

But as a few dusty debris fell from above, the trouble was far from over.

"S-shit..." Venom muttered, frantically out of reaction covering his body over Jinx as tons of concrete and metal landed from above, burying the two lovey doveys alive. Blood chuckled as he retracted his hand, turning to our two crimson crawlers.

"Jinx was always a softy." Blood pondered, teleporting down to the other two. "One down, two to go."

"N-no you didn't!" Carnage growled, sharp objects forming all around him. "You just did not take out my best pals!"

"Best pals?" Toxin said beside Blood in mocking laughs. "You have no friends Cassidy. You never did. And that's why you kill. Because daddy and mommy never hugged you… and no one wanted to hang out with you."

"Don't play that game with me 'son'," Carnage was all business now. "I'll gladly skin that smirk right off your face."

"Then do it." Blood challenged. "You were always all talk weren't you?"

"Cassidy chill out! He's just trying to-"

"Die!" Carnage just dove forward without thinking, Spider-Man's pleas not working as usual. Blood smirked, easily side stepping the attack, suddenly lunging and ramming his knee into Carnage's ribcage and then an elbow to his back. Cassidy's limp body landed, the symbiote groaning as loud as its host was on the floor.

"Wow," Spider-Man walked over to the crimson symbiote, never seeing anyone do exactly what Blood just did. Two shots and Carnage seemed out of it. "Cassidy, you alright?"

"Oooowie…" Carnage whined, only to shake it off. "D-dammit I'm fine… but Parker… all hatred between us aside… can you do me a favor?"

"Uh.. what?"

"You see that red thing over there? About 20 meters away?"

"Uh…"

"Well I think that's my spleen…"

"Eeew… I-"

"And now it's just the hero." Blood hissed, Spider-Man looking up and beginning to back pedal faster then a politician figured out.

"Whoa-whoa wait! Can't we settle this doing something else?"

"Like what?"

"Uh… Blackjack?"

"Too civil…"

"Poker?"

"Too trendy…"

"Monopoly?"

"Takes too long…"

"I know! Pogs!"

"Whoa, too 1990s."

"Pokemon card game?"

"AH! That'd be great!" Blood cheered, only to sigh. "But I don't have my deck. Sorry, tough luck."

"DARN IT!" Spider-Man scowled. "This is going to end with fight to the death isn't it?"

"Bingo…"

"Hey! Let's play Bingo! I know you know the song-GAAAAAAAAH!" Spider-Man squirmed, a tendril now wrapped securely around his neck. Like an anaconda Toxin began to squeeze. The image of his head popping like a balloon wasn't a nice one, and Spider-Man couldn't help but think of that.

"Have a nice after-life…" Blood was about to finish the job. "Or better yet… don't."

_I can't go out like this…_

"And you won't."

BLAST!

Toxin suddenly let out a screech to the Heavens, the bonded duo turning while dropping Spidey. Peter was coughing hard, looking around to see a fuzzy form about a few feet from him. That fuzziness was a light of what looked to be like an angel.

"R-raven?" Spidey blinked.

"Stay back." was the only reply he received. Spider-Man really had no choice but to do so. Raven's voice was like a cross between her own, but also of a girl of even more confidence and power. Wasn't Raven already scary enough?

Apparently not to Blood.

"Whoa," Sebastian chuckled, staring down this white adorned Raven with a little amusement. "Attire change huh? Nice."

"Call it what you will." Raven replied. "But you can call what I'm about to do to you a rearrangement of your body parts."

"Heh-heh-heh," Toxin chuckled, Blood smirking as the mask of the symbiote came over his face. "Bravado won't get you anywhere my dear."

"Did somebody say Bravo TV?" Carnage whispered, little birdies flying around his head. "Boy that channel sucks…"

Everyone just sweat dropped for a second, only to get back into form as Raven floated in between Spider-Man and the monster of all monsters!

"I sense you've grown in power." Blood muttered. "It's still not enough."

"You only sense a part of me." Raven smiled, her white cape fluttering like a certain superhero from Krypton.

"A part, of you?"

"Yes a part of me." Another dark, vicious sounding voice called out from higher above. Blood looked up to see red. Red eyes, red cape, and a dead red aura to boot.

"Uh no, not her." Spider-Man gasped, staring Anger down shaking at the knees.

"I love what you've done to the place Blood." Anger lowered to the ground, the eyes of her father staring the symbiote down. "But father doesn't take too kindly to people that want to show him up."

"Heh, is that so?" Blood smirked. "Then you better tell Satan that he isn't the worst thing around anymore sweetheart."

"No," Anger growled at the insult of Trigon. "Why don't my sister and I give you a one way ticket to Hell so you can tell him yourself? Ready Raven?"

"Always…"

Soon the two Ravens stood side by side, glaring down Blood as Spider-Man and Carnage looked on with as much involvement in this as a steel spoon.

_I spend two weeks in another dimension, and here comes a fight to save existence. Bad Karma? Oh yeah…_

This was one last fight to the finish. And this was for ALL the marbles.

Hah! I said marbles… heh-heh-heh.

- Arach –

"Larry, get back here!"

Thump-thump.

Thump-thump.

Thump-thump.

If you couldn't tell, that was what you call a heart beat. And as fast as that was going, Larry probably felt it was going even faster. This super hero business was sure not worth it, and his admiration for Robin had just grown 30 full.

Richard Grayson should now be truly scared. Really scared!

"I cannot face that monster." Larry gulped, hiding behind a few crates in the warehouse filled with Best Buy junk. Black Cat had made him her little servant. And all was going 'okay' until Larry was shown the hero he had to distract.

A raging Incredible Hulk!

"There you are!" Black Cat found our little tike, grabbing him by his cape. "Why'd you run away?"

"Ms. Cat! That villainous man was far too dangerous for me to distract!" Larry shook his head. "Larry cannot face him! He was green, mean, and not so lean!"

"But why? Are you scared?" Black Cat rolled her eyes. "Aren't you the great Larry? Larry the Legend? The destroyer of Spider-Man, Venom, and Carnage?"

"Nooooo!" Larry shook his head.

"Yo yo yo," A blaze of firey fun soared overhead, the teenage heart throb looking down on our weird pair.

Hey boys and girls! It's Johnny Storm!

"Torch," Black Cat scowled. "Aren't you supposed to be taking care of Hulk?"

"Already taken care of babe," The Human Torch replied, rubbing his chest, a bit of steam coming out. "Apparently Hulk was just hungry. A few breakfast burritos and all that HULK SMASH YOU stuff was out the door."

"Ain't that a scary thought?" BC replied sarcastically, making an angry face at Larry.

"Oh why are you so harsh on the kid? Okay so he took Spidey to another dimension. He's only what? 7 years old? Knowing Spider-Man he'll find his way back."

"No! This kid has to go get him!" Black Cat pouted. "I miss… my little Spider."

"Aaaaw there there," Johnny 'flamed off'. "I'm sure he's fine. That guy can get out of some tough situations."

"I still want him back! And it's all this kid's fault that he's gone!" Black Cat put him down.

"Well, let's just stay calm, and relax." Johnny put his arm around Felecia Harding's shoulder. "Everything will be okay."

BC's feline eyes followed whole way.

"If you don't get your hand off me, you're going to be wishing to go to another dimension."

"Oh lord how did that get there?" Johnny muttered, pulling away as slyly as can be.

"Whatever… I-"

"My finger!" Larry yelled out in excitement. "It is working!"

"Finger?" Johnny blinked. "Kid… uh, say what?"

"Oh my Gawd!" Black Cat grew elated, staring at the glowing extremity. "Does this mean we can go get Spider back?"

"Yes indeed Ms. Cat!" Larry jumped up and down spinning. "Yaaaaaaaaaaay!"

"Let's go! We're going!" Black Cat grabbed his wrist excitedly, almost crushing it. "Teleport now!"

"Ow! B-but Ms. Cat I-"

POOOOOF!

After the dust and fanning it all away Johnny was now standing in the room all alone. The Fantastic Four member just shook his head, thinking of what just happened. "Why do I not envy you Spidey?"

Blink.

"… Why do I not envy you?"


	13. Happy Happy Joy Joy! Angry Angry, Oh boy

**A/N: **All good things come to an end. And all not so good things come to an end too... take your pick at what this fic is. This is dedicated to all the people that had the patience to wait. And for the people who kept supporting me at even my most low moods… Nichole! Thank you everyone!

An epilogue wrapping up this whole series still needs to be written. I changed my mind again. The next chapter is a shorty. But this thing needs another bit for closure for sure. God I am so indecisive... welcome to the world of fiction I guess : )

---------

**_The End of Arachnophobia: Part Deux_**

_----------_

_Lady in red! _

_Dancing with me!_

_Cheek to cheek..._

"She's pretty. She has four eyes. She loves death! O-M-G! Parker, please tell me I'm not dreaming!"

Ladies and Gentlemen... I give you teenage Carnage.

"Ugh, you must be dreaming," Peter stared at Carnage then back at Anger. "Or in this case nightmaring!"

"Let's kill him already." Anger growled impatiently at Raven. "Demon's don't like waiting remember?"

"I call the shots... calm down." Raven answered with complete serenity.

"Hah! Like Hell you are," Anger fumed. "Enjoy this partnership while you can sis. Because once my Sladey pie comes back? Dad's going to be running the show!"

"We'll see about that." Raven said with the utmost confidence. It was obvious a little of Spider-Man's philosophy was rubbing off on her.

_Confidence will always overcome stupidity._

"Whatever," Anger hissed. "Let's just give this red number a taste of a good demonic ass kicking."

"With pleasure."

"Ugh, can we please get this over with?"

Blood was playing this as cool as Orlando Bloom in a Peter Jackson movie, as if two demonic beings weren't bad enough for him, waiting for something miraculous to happen for the good guys. Was this a smart move? I mean he just wiped his nose with three of the toughest arachnoids in the 'Marvel' universe. He was more then ready to take on these Ravens right?

EEENK! Wrong!

Magic. It was sort of like a fusion thing but it wasn't. Raven and her rageful counterpart faded into a dusty pile of black, the energy swirling around like a killer tornado in the Texas Midwest. Blood was cool with this, heck more like amused. But when he saw a red being coming out of the pile of black as if it was some sort of dimensional portal? You can bet your sweet rear that his bloodied jaws were dropped to the floor.

Crikies.

"Whoa," Carnage stood up at long last, scratching his head. "Who's this chick?"

"Raven…?" Spider-Man gasped at horrid realization.

"Two words..." Cassidy snapped his neck around. "Creepy awesome."

Long flowing white hair. Red skin. And an all black robe that would make Death herself whine like a baby about copyright infringement. Four red eyes were now what made up the devilish vixen that stood beyond the portal. Sharp teeth shined as this remnant of Raven was unleashed. Trigon's avatar people. Not good! NOT GOOD!

"I always wondered what kind of force could actually make my daughter crawl to me for help" A Trigon possessed Raven stared down the symbiote in front of her. "You're as ugly as I'd imagined. Bravo."

"Touche." Blood replied wittingly with crossed arms.

And now all of our heroes were stuck in a gigantic rut!

"This is my world." Raven warply growled. "And I ain't gonna let some red goop and punk kid take it over."

"Save the theatrics Devil girl," Sebastian sighed. "We have a world to take over remember?"

"Correction junior," A crackle and a pop of energy spurted out of Raven's eyes. "You HAD a world to take over."

--

Attention! This story has been brought to you by Interdimensional Transportation.

The new age in vacation traveling!

--

"Whoa!" Black Cat manifested out of thin air, feeling as if her mind had been scrambled with a side of bacon and eggs. Splitting and reconnecting atoms just isn't natural or healthy.

"Well Ms. Cat," Larry was quite delighted, that magic finger of his no longer worthless. "We are now here! In Jump City! Home of the Teen Titans! Yay!"

"Sweet!" The sassy feline pumped that white paw. "Now we gotta find my Spider."

One insty bintsy teeny weenie polka dotted yellow bikini glance around this dump of a city and pretty much anyone would be a bit breath taken. Or, REALLY breath taken anyway. But then again, if you were one of those Captain Planet baddies you'd probably just be giddy happy right about now

"What the hell happened here?" Black Cat was beyond logic, this place literally looking like Hell.

"I do not know," Larry glanced around just as stupidly, a harsh glare from his voluptuous partner in crime was the only reply he received.

"Ms. Cat do not look at me that way! I did not do this!"

"Well technically kid… you did."

All eyes turned.

"V-venom?" Black Cat was actually somewhat happy to see this psycho of a villain. If this guy was here Spidey was definitely here.

"Uh, not that you ever look pleasant but er, what made you look like that?"

Black Cat had never seen Venom this 'messed up' since Spider-Man wisely tricked him into crashing a Heavy Death Metal concert.

"We're… having problems." Venom stated the obvious; peeping down to see our unconscious Jinxy napping away in his arms.

"Hey did you lose some weight? You look smaller." Black Cat whapped him on the arm only to get an angry stare. "Aw how cute! Venom is that your girlfriend?"

"…"

"Pink hair," Black Cat, suddenly forced one of Jinx's eyelids open. "Whoa, cat contacts… you gotta get her to tell me-"

"We're not in the mood!" Venom shouted with goop breath.

"Ugh, fine grumpy guss." Black Cat was now back to her business, after looking away in annoyance. "Now where is my Spider, Tongue boy?"

"A few blocks down," Venom's symbiote sensed it all. "Well, if he isn't dead."

"… Larry did this?" Our doppelganger gasped dejectedly. "I hurt the Titans? No! No! No!"

Ignoring Venom's face of disgust, Black Cat made one of those sad faces at Larry out of sympathy. Over the past week or so, she hated to admit it. She REALLY hated this truth. Truth is? Larry had become good company… even a good friend. This girl had no reason to be a pissy biznitch anymore. She kind of even felt guilty,

"Aw there there," Felecia Hardy showed her hard-to-find maternal side. "We'll save the… er… Titans, and Spider, and the rest of this world okay?"

Sniffle. Sniffley! Sniffliest!

"And we'll be doing the same."

"R-robin?" Larry perked up at the voice, the Boy Wonder instantly regretting letting his presence be known. The doppelganger was elated. Behind Robin were all the Titans – including a nicked up Cyborg along with a beat Starfire and Beast Boy.

"Well if it isn't the nerd herd." Venom insulted them. "Better late then never we guess."

"Nerd herd my toosh." Black Cat zipped across the space between her and the Titans. She eyed down Robin, hands on his suit all friendly like. "Nice suit… there… black… red… I likey."

"Uh… who are you?" Robin's X mask was off, that repeating blink being totally visible.

"Black Cat at your service cutie." Felecia was firing on all cylinders.

"What ever happened to 'your' Spider?" Venom remarked, only to yelp as he was elbowed.

Robin sweatdropped, "R-right…"

"This girl comes from our neck of the woods" Venom rubbed his chest.

"And I am quite the handful cuteness.. EEP!" As if by miracle Black Cat found her muscle toned body, lifted by her costume and easily tossed back in a funky spill. The feline looked up to see firey emerald eyes.

"I do not know of you, but friend Robin needs his space!" Exhausted or not Starfire would always protect her 'man'. Tamaraneans were territorial. Especially the females.

"Please do not-" Koriand'r was silenced by a clawed finger.

"Lemme guess," Felecia turned to Robin. "Another girlfriend?"

"Yes!" Starfire pushed the finger away. "I am a girl and I am a friend!"

"Once again... nice," Black Cat found comfort in repetitive dialogue, just like a certain author who posts on ff dot net with the initials JB,

"Whoa, Larry?" A lazy eyed BB was as always, a bit behind in the conversation. "Dudes, why does my hair feel like it's aching?"

"Starbolts bro," Cyborg answered.

"My apologize Beast Boy!" Starfire frowned, patting the green boy's head.

"Speaking of pain," Vic Stone eyed our symbiote.

Venom sighed. "It was just a stupid car."

"It's not just a stupid car!"

"Oh right, it was made of metal too." Venom's row of teeth made its presence known. "What was it? Your brother? Sister? Or uncle?"

"Now wait a minute here you ugly-"

"Awww," A soft voice got between them. The two looking down to see our carnation eyed vixen. "Two men fighting over lil ol me! How awesome!"

Blinks.

"You saved my life," Jinx snuggled against Venom's chest, Eddie gulping some more.

"O-o-only because you were crazy enough to 'save' mine!"

To Jinx that was only nonsense.

"... You love me don't you?"

"Ugh…"

PLOP! Jinx suddenly found her rear on asphalt.

"We need a plan." Robin was the only one on tap as usual; those eyes molded by Batman himself showing complete and utter concentration. He wasn't even blinking yo!

"Well I'll help you anyway possible cutie." Black Cat said with a naughty tone. "But do me a favor," she inhaled that air loudly. "TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON?"

"You mean what's going on… as in Spider-Man having a girlfriend now or the End of the world?" Venom timely muttered.

"Y-yea, I mean the End…" Black Cat froze like a statue.

… _girlfriend?_

_Girlfriend…_

_GIRLFRIEND!_

"… SAY WHAT!"

RUMBLE…

RUMBLE…

RUMBLE!

The ground was shaking. The Earth was breaking apart. This wasn't the cause of Black Cat's tantrum surprisingly.

"Um..." Venom sighed, having the worst feeling shoot through his symbiote. "We suggest you all prepare for the worst... and then multiply that worry times a hundred."

Robin looked over towards the battle zone afar. "So… predictable."

--

Moments before.

Brother Blood had been dominating every mortal in this dimension, not even breaking so much as a sweat. But now it was time he met his match. The symbiotic madman was turning into a human/alien bonded pinball. If you were quiet enough you could probably here the pings and pongs right now.

Ping.

Pong.

"Blagh!" Blood yelped as his head found the impact of a sharp elbow, his jaw soon loosened by a punch that would send anyone to Hell and back. No pun intended. The crimson villain back pedaled, swinging out of instinct, only to see his clawed hand flail away, Raven grabbing the wrist and pulling his stomach into a knee.

"This isn't amusing anymore." Raven taunted, tossing Toxin and Blood aside and to the floor. "Don't tell me I went up from Hell for this."

"... Mocking me?" Blood stood up with even more anger fuming, spitting out blood. Again, no pun intended.

"You're mocking yourself with that costume." The four eyed demon grinned evilly. "At least the Spider boy in the tacky costume over there would tickle a demon's fancy. Oi... and I thought Raven had little taste."

"Ay! What's that supposed to mean?" Spider-Man crossed his arms.

"Grrr, no one makes a fool out of me!" Blood tried to surprise Raven by sending a sharp tendril that could pierce reinforced tank armor. Quicker, smarter, or just plain more badass, another tendril of black coiled around Toxin's matter, squeezing it like an anaconda would a… I dunno, another anaconda?

"It's going to take more then an ugly suit and some smartass juvenile to stop me."

"Let go! Let go! Let go!" Blood struggled only to have his request answered with delight, his body being bashed into the ground at a force that sent rippled throughout the ground. Raven began to do her magic thing soon after, a dazy symbiote ready to be toast.

"Nice knowing you." Raven's eyes erupted bright red, ready to fire, only to see that Blood did his own little trick of teleportation, appearing behind her.

"Aw, but we were just starting to get along!"

In the symbiote's hands formed a titanic scimitar made from Toxin that would make Cloud Strife's Buster Sword have an inferiority complex. In a sadistic swipe, the sword was brought down. CLANK! The sword made contact. But a hand to the sharpest point of the blade only trickled an ounce of blood.

"Sword fighting?" Raven's small wound from blacking the attack so nonchalantly began to heal. "How old school."

"Now... that wasn't supposed to happen." Blood blinked.

Raven's telepathic nature formed her own blade, one swipe dissecting Blade's sword. The metal clanked with no use. Sebastian was pissed off, staring at the handle, letting the weapon seep back into his body without hesitation. Ms. Roth did the same, only to have already prepared her next attack.

"Zinthos!" The Trigonian sent out a blast that shook the air around them, Blood being burnt to a crisp, falling to the ground in ash form.

"What are we going to do?" Spider-Man watched, clenching his fist as Brother Blood was on the edge of defeat.

"What do you mean what are we going to do?" Carnage asked.

"No, Blood loses... we still lose." Peter muttered. "That isn't the Raven I know over there..."

"Well duh, this one is ten times better." Cassidy commented to deaf ears.

It was wishful thinking. And the time right now seemed to be Brother Blood's end. The symbiotic powerhouse was no so pathetic, crawling away as a demonic steroid juiced Raven continued to stroll playfully towards him, flames from the abyss sparkling from her fingers.

"Really admirable how you're trying to destroy the world." Raven mocked. "But leave this to the professionals kid. This is a demon's job."

Brother Blood groaned with a pathetic noise, only to let Toxin slither to the surface of his face, "Hah, all you demons do is screw yourselves every damn time."

"... I beg your pardon?"

"You lost your paradise from the will of a God." Brother Blood began to chuckle confidently, or freakishly if you choose. "Well, the way I see it? I think you're about to lose your own existence because of another God."

"… Wha—?"

It happened so fast, Carnage and Spider-Man were totally clueless. A spark of energy emitted from Raven, then the silhouette of a tendril began to take shape between Blood's hand and our demon girls back. She was impaled... but strangely enough there was not an ounce of blood.

"Satan will always be a loser." Blood and Toxin began to laugh manically as Raven transformed into pure red energy, splitting, a Raven in red and white now adjacent to one another once again. Spider-Man and Carnage were silent, and drop jawed to boot.

"What happened?" Raven gasped, looking down at her reformed self.

"Uh oh," Anger's quadratic eye formation blinked in unison.

"Uh oh?" Raven went quirky. "I really don't want to hear those words right now."

"Well then... UH OH UH OH UH OH UH OH!" Anger growled in her face. Before our pure Raven could act a whistle from Blood would catch their attention.

"Oh ladies, what's the problem?" Blood's face was covered by a floating golden formation, Toxin's pseudopodia shooting around it like it was in orbit. "… That time of month again?"

"… What did you do?" Raven scowled her infamous scowl.

"Devil's aren't meant to be free." Blood simply answered, a golden token with demonic writing forming in his hand, Toxin's matter creating it. "And with a little help from you two, I am now in control of your daddy's essence… pretty sweet to be a mystical empathic isn't it?"

"That's not possible." Raven said in disbelief.

"Oh according to Reading Rainbow it definitely is," Blood began to float in the air, energies of the darkest kind filling the city. "Sorry ladies for my rude behavior, but excuse me! I have a world to end!"

"Don't worry Raven I'll save—!" Spider-Man was about to do his swing into action, webline going, not even thinking, ready to kick Blood in the kisser routine. A blast cancelled all actions, Spidey skidding into the feet of one Raven Roth.

"Ooow…"

"My hero…" Raven rolled her eyes.

"We're in trouble aren't we?" Spider-Man grimaced, being helped up by his amore.

"... Are you clumsy?"

"DOH!"

--

Trigon saw this in his vision. Raven saw this in her nightmares. Spider-Man had seen this in sci-fi movies. And Carnage had seen this while drinking a little too much coffee.

Demons were erupting out of the ground, the sky turning an oozing red tint. The fiery masses of evil were gathering for a takeover, Trigon's essence now bonded into Blood. With the help of Toxin and his own studies of demonism Sebastian was playing with fire... and it was the world that was gonna get burned.

"Listen to me dammit!" Anger growled, standing in front of a few demons as they just continued to stroll towards their new master. Angry Raven hated to be ignored. She hated to be treated like a mortal just as much.

"Not much loyalty to our father." Raven commented.

"Oh shut up!" Anger looked at her hands, staring at the gray extremities. "That son of a bitch just took the essence that made us who we are! I am useless without dad's strength! You are the same way!"

"Speak for yourself..."

"Ladies," Spidey got in between them, "Can we save this?"

"Damn you Parker!" Carnage had popcorn in his hands. "I wanted to see a catfight!"

"…"

"Shut your sharp toothed red neck mouth before I rip it off." Anger exploded. Carnage blinked a few times, only to turn away towards Spider-Man.

"Parker she's perfect for me!"

"Ugh..." Spider-Man turned towards the only other sane person in the group. "Raven, what do we do?"

"I... don't know."

The question was like a knife to the midsection, Raven knew she would be in a position like this. It was scary that in her visions she never had an answer. Then again, Spider-Man used to have no place in her life either. Things… can be changed.

"But I'll find out..."

Cue that cute little pause of lovey doveys staring at one another.

… Then shatter that with your Ken Griffey Jr. autographed baseball bat.

"Ugh dream on," Anger said, rolling her eyes away from a gazing Carnage. "Blood has all the power now. This whole planet is going to be at war with an army of devil warriors... this guy is stealing our show!"

The four unlikely allies stood strong in the storm, luckily for them Blood no longer being interested in them. With that symbiotic symbol of control, he didn't need these kids anymore.

"Why are we complaining?" Carnage smirked. "A little destruction isn't bad for everyone."

Suddenly as on cue the fireballs began to rain down, demons getting the signal to attack as Blood laughed amusingly with his symbiote pet.

"Run!" Spidey yelled, the foursome ducking and weaving their way through the streets, taking cover behind broken cars and what not. Diving behind a building, Raven clenched her fist as she panned.

"I have to stop him." Raven muttered. "If I can only get that demonic essence back."

"We'll get it," Spidey he patted her shoulder, smirking behind his mask. "No army from Hell is going to stop me… or fireballs… or demonic symbiotes… oi… that could've been left out of this inspiring speech."

"... Thanks for the confidence boost."

"Don't mention it."

"Ugh, my scum of a kid is bonded to him… I gotta-" Carnage scratched his head, suddenly a hot dog stand catching his eye, any remnants of an intelligent thought destroyed.

"Wow hot dogs!"

Spidey and Raven just growled, just another fireball bursted from above. Anger bit her lip, eyeing Blood, "Ugh Dad's gonna be so pissed off at me…"

"Okay here's the plan." Spidey pointed. "Carnage, and uh… girl in red… we need a diversion to get Blood's attention."

"H-hey who made you boss?" Carnage complained.

"Got any better ideas?"

"Yea!"

"One that would help us in our situation and doesn't have to do with cutting my head off?"

"Uh… No!"

"Thought so..."

The four were about to bring their plan altogether, but as soon as any remnants of order would be formed demons began to pop up from everywhere. Sort of like Emo kids at the mall. Two demons leaped towards the group, a webline and a pseudopodia shot answering the call.

"Heh, this is fun." Carnage was feeling more like his old self by the second, a blade slashing through a demon like butter.

"Good, cause we have about a million more of these to take care of." Spider-Man commented, bothering these flaming buggers with more adhesives.

"This (bleeping) sucks." Anger growled, feeling so helpless, looking up at Blood. "I am getting my powers back you asshole!"

"Heh-heh-heh," Blood looked down at them, Trigon's essence burning around him. "No, I like your powers, I think I'll keep them. But I can give you a nice parting gift... death,"

Soon the demon numbers were too much, Spidey and Carnage back to back as Raven and her angry counterpart were cornered. The End of the World was here, and their end was coming soon if something wouldn't happen. But what do you know? Is that a Red X ninja star? Is that some Starbolts? Dude! Sonic Cannon!

In the words of Puffy Ami Yumi…

TEEN TITANS GO!

"Heh, bout time you guys showed up!" Spider-Man commented as our favorite teenage super group came in strong.

"Wouldn't miss this for the world dude!" Beast Boy jumped in kicking a demon a couple of miles away as a kangaroo.

"Not gonna be much of a world if we don't do something!" Cyborg's arm turned into a bolt of light, crushing another demon.

"So the bad guys really do just keep getting uglier." Robin commented, mowing down the area with blasts from his X-gun.

"I resent that comment," Carnage hissed, walking off. "Yet it's extremely flattering at the same time. I'll remember that after I kill my kid up there."

"Cassidy wait!" Spider-Man tried to stop him but Carnage was off for the big fish.

"W-why is there... two Ravens?" Starfire muttered as she put a pause to her relentless Tamranaean attack.

"Oh no," Beast Boy gasped.

"NOT HER!" BB and Cyborg yelled at the same time.

"Nice to see you fellas again." Anger giggled in the most f'd up way you could imagine. "But if I want to make daddy happy... I better follow that Carnage kid!"

Forming a circle the Titans were bashing away at the countless numbers, only the delaying the seemingly inevitable.

"I have to get to Blood too." Raven yelled to Spider-Man.

"You two go!" Robin commanded, helping Starfire dispatch of a titanic demonic warrior. "We'll try to hold them off!"

"You're the boss." Spidey said almost jokingly, grabbing onto Raven, around her waist, slithering a webline to a nearby building.

"Stay safe," Raven said the words to her friends, more like a request. She couldn't bare thinking anything bad could happen to them.

"Oh we will," Beast Boy smirked. "Just don't get too cozy as you swing towards that direction you two."

"W-WHA?" Spidey and Raven gasped.

The rest of the Titans chuckled in mid battle, a little levity needed as they did the butt kicking they did so many times. But wait! They were blushing Spider-Man and Raven were! Aw, so cute!

"Don't get used to this." Raven muttered.

"I want to live to see tomorrow… so don't worry I won't." Spidey gulped.

--

It was like a western, but like a sci-fi movie at the same time. Brother Blood stood at the top of a roof, on top of the world. On top of a world that was going to be one giant flaming marshmallow pretty soon. But as the essence evil stood cross armed, eyes closed, and his bad ass clothes flapping in the wind? The most unlikely hero made some footsteps behind him.

"This world isn't big enough for the two of us hombre."

One of Blood's eyes opened without a concern in the world, the sight of a pissed off Carnage in a black and torn cowboy hat not even worthy of his attention.

"Oh dad," Toxin sighed. "Why don't you just give up? You're not the strongest of us anymore."

"Well that's where you're wrong partnah." Carnage chewed on the straw, pointing. "I don't care how powerful you think are. My crazy will kick your uber powers in the ass kiddo."

"All talk, that's all you've become." Blood's eyes glowed red, suddenly ropes of pure energy stringing around Carnage, the symbiote's eyes bulging as it squeezed.

"H-hey! UNFAIR!" Carnage spat.

"I think you old symbiotes should have expiration dates." Blood chuckled, tightening the rope, the crimson symbiote he called 'dad' squirming.

"I couldn't agree more!"

BOOM!

That voice wasn't from Carnage, but from a more noble man. It was from our Spider-Man! And that boom was a punch that Brother Blood took like a man, not even budging as Peter's fist was drilled into his cheekbone. The indent stood but as Blood creeped his neck back, Spidey began to feel his chipped fist.

"Ooouch…" Spidey backed away grabbing his fist, only to be shoved back with another blast that sent him tumbling across the building.

Blood didn't have time to comment feeling Carnage coming from behind, easily dispatching his predecessor with a kick that the speed of light could only understand. Cassidy skidded and slammed into a wall, his pseudopodia tentacles breaking his fall.

"So annoying." Blood said to our two arachnids.

"Gee, thanks," Spider-Man smiled, coughing a bit of blood.

"We only try for you sonny boy." Carnage did the same, both getting up. "Come on Brotha! Don't let my stupid kid take over your mind! Return to being the clueless teacher!"

"Shut up!" Blood screamed, clenching his fists as demonic flames began to engulf the area. "I was going to let you two see the End of the World, but now you don't even deserve seeing it!"

"Yada yada yada," Spider-Man scowled. "End of the world? You know how many times I've heard this routine?"

Blood turned to the crimson hero. "Heh, that's why you're the big hero of the other universe... fine, maybe you aren't afraid to die... but I know what you are afraid of."

The devilish symbiote held out his hand, forming a ball of energy, pointing it at a wall.

"I know Raven's back there... and I think she deserves to die first."

Spider-Man's eyes lit up, the arachnid looking at a powerless Raven who was frozen. "W-wait!"

"No Spider-Man, stay back." Raven went out from her hiding spot, staring down Blood. "You think I'm afraid?"

"Fear of your own death is irrelevant." Blood was ready to blast her existence away. "But the idea of your friends losing you is all I am aiming for."

Raven gulped, not backing down. She was tired of running away from her destiny.

"Raven, get away!" Spider-Man walked in front of her.

"No... you two get away." Raven muttered, looking at Spider-Man... with a damn smile… Yes… you read it… a smile. "... Thanks for everything."

"W-what..?" Spidey went puzzled, only to see himself be engulfed in black energy, the same thing happening with Carnage, only that symbiote receiving a boot that would send him flying off the building.

"AAAY!" Cassidy plummeted downward.

"Raven what are you doing?" Spider-Man struggled to free himself, Raven not letting him.

"You can't fight my fight..." Raven whispered, then frowned with the sadness in her heart. "If I don't make it... it's not your fault."

"R-raven no! Let me-"

Before he could answer a ray of energy cut through the air, the blast slashing at Spider-Man's shoulder, the explosion sending the arachnid off the building in an unconscious state. Raven gasped, her heart stopping as she saw her friend wounded.

"Spider-Man!" Raven ran over, only to be stopped by a teleported Blood.

"As nice as that moment was with your boyfriend, your time with your daddy is coming soon." The sadistic symbiote smiled at his dirty work,

"Y-you… bastard." Raven clenched her fist, emotions of the most strength running through her. Sadness, anger, all of it was pumping like a ball of angst turned energy inside.

"Whoa, you still have some power left in the tank after I hi-jacked it all?" Blood chuckled.

"My… powers… don't come from my father." Raven's energy erupted from her eyes. "They come from my friends... and I won't let you hurt them anymore..."

"Heh, tell that to your dead spider."

At that instant, the essence of anger could be seen streaking into Raven, the Azarathean's soul self bursting out of her and towards Blood. The symbiote/Blood combination was already prepared...

--

He opened his eyes.

Was this heaven?

One eyed masks.

This was hell?

No… it was worse.

"How you are so famous in your own world is a question that I must solve."

"W-wait…" Spidey's swirly eyes tried to decipher the upside-down image before him. "Aren't y-you..."

"Slade," The figure with the demonic sign answered. "And you are the... Spider-Man I hear so much about."

"Y-yea, I-"

"I am not impressed." A thud followed that insult, Spidey quickly flipping to his feet, clutching his shoulder which took quite a wound. "Your antics is nearly costing this world its right to exist."

"Ugh, I got no time to talk to the likes of you."

"I just saved your life kid." Slade's eye peered in the other direction. "Have a little respect."

"... I thought you were one of the bad guys."

"You thought correct." Slade chuckled, looking at the demon/earthling war below. "But, for my plans, this world needs to stay where it is."

"Man, whatever." Spider-Man scowled. "Thanks for the favor."

ZIP! The webline shot out of his wrist, but being stopped by a grip that could crush steel. Spidey looked over with a bit of surprise as Slade was looking up the building our hero was trying to scale.

"Even if you do go up there, you can't help Raven win without a plan."

"Plans?" Spider-Man scowled. "I got no time for plans! Her life is in danger!"

"And so is the rest of the planet," Slade sighed. "And they tell me you are one of the brainier heroes."

"I..." Spidey was silenced… for the first time ever in life. "Y-you're right... what can I do?"

"Oh I wouldn't worry about this too much kiddo." Slade smirked walking off. "All you need is a little miracle, and some magic... hmmph, or was that some McDonalds commercial?"

"H-hey wha?" Spidey turned to give a weird look only to see the masked man completely gone.

"Oh my God… YOU!"

That voice brought back memories of the best and worst kind.

"Cat..."

SLAP!

"OW!" Spider-Man popped up, holding his cheek. "What was that for?"

"You know how many of us were worried out of our pants for you?" Black Cat scolded at Spidey, our Parker just making faces like a innocent puppy.

"The Fantastic Four! Iron Man! The X-men! Daredevil! We were having heart attacks looking for you! And then to top it off we're handling your business! Everyone was talking bad about you but I defended you! I gave you the benefit of the doubt! But nooooo! I hear you're traveling to different dimensions on vacation and making girl friends! Ugh!"

"... I..."

"No excuses Spider!" Black Cat turned playfully, crossing her arms and 'hmph'ing.

"L-look," Spider-Man held his wound, feeling the after-effects of near death. "I got no time... Raven-"

"Raven?" Black Cat's eyes enlarger, turning. "That's her name isn't it? Ugh! That's such a lame bird name! Cats eat birds!"

"I am sorry." Spider-Man sighed, "But I gotta save the world and my friends right now okay?"

"Ugh… whatever," She turned her head back with a sexy smile. "But you owe me some explanation... and some time alone."

"... Man, what does this matter anyway?" Spider-Man looked up. "I don't know what to do." he dropped his head in defeat. "Blood is unstoppable."

"T-this is Larry's fault." Suddenly the doppelganger popped up from behind Black Cat.

_All you need is a miracle, and some magic..._

"Y-you!" Spider-Man gasped and pointed, eyes bulging. "This all started with you!"

"Gah!" Larry hid behind Black Cat, clinging onto the vixen's leg. A lot of people would be so envious at this point. But remember... no one can be jealous of Larry, got it!

"I am sorry Mr. Spider-Man! Larry did not mean to use his magic finger to destroy the world!"

"Are you— wait." Spidey looked at Larry. "What did you say?"

"I am sorry Mr.—"

"No after that!"

"Larry did not meant to use his magic finger to destroy the—"

"Magic finger..." Spider-Man smiled, energy rejuvenating him. The arachnid grabbed our doppelganger. "You want to fix things don't you Larry?"

"Y-yes... but—"

"You started this," Spidey began to propel both of them upwards. "Let's finish this!"

"What?" Black Cat growled. "Larry is going to beat that thing! B-but he can't even tie his own shoes Spider! Bring my little tike back here!"

Slade looked from a far distance his head drooped to the floor.

_They just don't make heroes like they used to._

--

Raven was determined but she was out of her league. Blood was just plain too strong. Breathing heavily out of exhaustion, the white hooded heroin missed a mystical blast, having her helpless attack answered with a shot to the gut.

A gasp that seemed inhumane squirted from Raven's lips as Blood just let her slide down to the floor.

"Daddy would be so disappointed in you." Blood chuckled, letting the insignia of the devil shoot out of his symbiote skin. "Want me to give him any last messages?"

Raven couldn't answer, blood dripping from her mouth as she wouldn't give up. The demoness leapt up, attempting to tackle Blood only to be side stepped, falling on all fours.

"You should look at yourself," Blood smiled. "So pathetic." A kick to her gray face, made Raven yelp so loud, the girl falling on her back, only to have her neck being pressed against cold concrete and Blood's foot.

"You complained about having the power to end the world... now look at you. I have that power and you have nothing."

"Aaagh!" Raven tried to struggle, grabbing a hold of Blood's foot that just kept crushing at Raven's face.

"Yes, that's it, cry out." Blood found amusement in torture. "Crushed like a little spider..."

Raven shook as fury bursted from her soul self again, the black bird of an aura, and shoving Blood back. The symbiote only back pedaled, Raven slowly getting up to only fall back on her knees. Bruised, and bleeding, Raven had nothing left, being pulled up by her purple hair.

"There there, you'll be seeing your boy toy soon... if daddy lets you that is." Blood formed a blade with his hand, putting it against her neck. Raven didn't even fight back, being limp in the mad man's grasp.

It was going to be over soon.

_Sorry… I-_

"You know you bad guys talk way too much."

"What the... you're still alive?"

"More than alive," Spider-Man smirked, shooting a webline across Bloods' neck that lassoed him. With a jerk the symbiote nearly had his neck snap off, teleporting to a stand from the far side of the building.

"Raven!" Spider-Man used the diversion to run over, and hold up his ailing friend, hugging her close.

"Y-you're alive..." Raven whispered, her half conscious and beaten state of mind forcing her head to rest against Spidey's chest.

"Of course," Spidey smirked. "You know better than anyone that I am harder to get rid of than a spaghetti stain on a white shirt."

"... T-thanks..." Raven broke another smile. It was like lighting striking twice... same spot... same exact moment!

"No thank yous yet." Spidey turned, holding Raven protectively as he stared down Blood. "I got to take this guy out once for all."

"And how do you expect to do that?" Blood jeered.

"Heh, all you bad guys are the same." Spider-Man titled his head amused. "You have the entire world in front of you and you think you're at the home stretch. But guess what? This is far from over."

"Says who?"

"Says the rule of heroism. The good guys always win!"

"... I am going to enjoy watching you die for real this time." Blood turned to Spider-Man, only to be side swiped by a feline.

"Hah! That's for nearly killing my Spider!" Black Cat flipped, standing side by side with a glad to be aided hero in crimson.

"You feel that?" Blood heard the voice of Spider-Man. "This is the feeling of your missed opportunity… you're gonna have so much therapy after this aren't ya?"

WHAM! A famous Spider-Man full momentum webswing kick finished the deal, plowing Blood through the wall and into the building itself. Black Cat began to celebrate immediately.

"Go Our Universe! OH YEA! That's how it's done!" Cat pranced, only to turn to Spider-Man and Raven. "Ugh, and since when did you like Gothic chicks?"

"..."

"You fools... this isn't over," Blood smiled, looking at his demonic insignia. "My demons are probably laying waste to your allies."

"Hah! You're kidding me!"

Carnage popped up, smiling like a spoiled little brat. But it was weirder than that folks, he was on a Hi-Definition LCD screen on the other side of the building. Oh yes... hi definition! All that ugly packed onto a mega pixeled screen!

"W-what the?"

"Hehe, well since ya knocked me down there, I decided to round up the whole gang by traveling through the TV tube lines." Carnage pointed. "Ya see Brotha, all those kids ya taught for so long are combining with those little goody two shoes down there! The H.I.V.E and the Titans are kickin' your demonic butts!"

The image began to static to battle zones, showing demons getting their rears handed to them by a plethora of Titans and H.I.V.E. members alike. Venom was leading the pack of baddies of course, while Robin the Titans.

"Aw what's the matter? You can have time for Carnage but not me your grandpa?" Venom sighed mockingly, looking at his own skin. "It's cause we're black isn't it!"

Blood fumed.

"You should've made sure we were dead... it's a family tradition." Venom hissed, Jinx jumping on his back and smiling with a piece sign.

"Sorry Master Blood! But we're gonna take you down!"

"Grrrrr..." Blood was now a literal fireball, a scream that shattered glass ripping through the city. "ENOUGH! THIS WORLD NEEDS TO DIE!"

Soaring upwards and into the black sky our ball of demonic Armageddon took flight, ready to unleash the most destructive force this world had ever seen. Spider-Man gasped as he felt Raven trying to stand herself up.

"L-let me go." Raven said with stutters, hobbling to a stand.

"Raven I need to get-"

"Larry, I know." Raven nodded, trying to regain her composure through deep breaths.

"Geez woman you know everything."

"Okay!" Black Cat scowled. "You are not touching Larry!" she was holding the little man in her arms protectively. "He is just a kid!"

"He's our only hope." Raven said that, only to shake her head. "I can't believe I just said that."

"Shut up you man stealing hussy!"

"..."

"Oh jeez..."

"It's okay Ms. Cat." Larry said with determined eyes. "I will defeat him without fear. Just like Robin would do!"

"B-but."

"This is very brave of you Larry." Spider-Man grabbed doppelganger. "You're a hero in my book."

"Yaay!"

"No celebrating." Raven began to glow. "Y-you'll need something to counteract Blood's attack... so you can get close enough for Larry to use his magic..."

"Raven... you're not ready to-" Spider-Man was interrupted.

"Have some faith." Raven looked up, a white Raven taking shape around her. "Get ready you two."

Spidey blinked. "You heard the lady Larry, let's do this."

"Okay!"

The moment of truth comes by in slow motion, Blood's attack already on its way to send Jump City to the anti-Disney Land we call Oblivion. The massive energy, bursting out crimson and ink black energies plummeted, Raven eyeing it down as her own white angelic power suddenly took flight, her soul self erupting with all she had left.

"Larry is ready..." He scowled, inwardly fearing for his life.

"Alright Larry... make this count." Spidey anchored himself against the ground, grabbing Larry by his wrist, web shooting around the small kid's arm.

"Mr. Spider-Man!"

"Wait..." Spidey looked as Raven's beam fought against Blood's attack, slowly giving inches to the symbitote's crimson fury.

Raven grimaced looking over at Spider-Man. "W-what are you waiting for?"

"I dunno... I was hoping there'd be some dramatic music or something." He began twisting his body for launch.

"Spider-Man!"

"J-just kiddin'." Spidey nodded. "Good luck Larry…"

VOOOOM! The kid shot off as Spider-Man heaved him, the boy darting up at speeds that eagles could only dream of. The missile followed Raven's attack, bursting through both beams like buttah. Blood could only see his giant orb of destruction, laughing, thinking victory was his.

"Good bye... world." Blood hissed.

"N-no..." The green and red tunic wearing projectile appeared, with finger pointing forward. "Good bye to you Mr. Blood!"

"W-what! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

The bright lights of heaven followed. Screams of pure anger and disbelief erupted as Toxin/Blood let their losing moment be known. The energy from Larry's finger channeled into symbiote, suddenly the whole area erupting in a gigantic flash of white light, similar to what started this journey in the first place.

There was only silence.

Okay that's enough silence no?

--

It was now Raven's turn to open her eyes. Ignoring all the strain and pain, those lavender orbs met that signature glassy white eyed mask with a look of concern.

"Is it... over?" Her voice cracked.

"The fight is..." Spider-Man smirked behind his mask, only to chuckle. "But my karaoke night is far from done... Girl I'll tell ya what I want, what I reall really want! Oh you'll tell me what ya want what I really really want!"

Raven and all the surrounding Titans around Spider-Man had one word to say about that.

"Ugh..."

Score another one for the good guys...

--

**A/N:** Be prepared for a twist... yes, and this time in THIS century.


	14. Bittersweet Bye Byes

**A/N: **It was a long time coming. Welcome to the end. Doot doot doot doot!

--

"_Why are you so sad?"_

"_You're leaving. How the Hell am I supposed to feel?"_

"_This isn't good bye you know."_

"_Then what is this exactly?"_

"_It's more like a see you later… if anything."_

"_You know that isn't true."_

"_I promise I'll be back."_

"… _I wish I could believe you."_

"_Have I ever given you a reason not to believe me? Come on."_

"_I-I don't want you to leave."_

"… _Trust me Raven. Trust me."_

"_No Peter. I don't want you to leave. You'll never... come back."_

"_Raven…"_

_Raven…_

_Raven?_

--

"R-raven…"

"Oh my God Harry," the hi-pitched voiced pierced Peter's aching ear, "Dammit Harry! He said something!"

Sniff.

"No way! Pete! Pete! Pete!" the faint feeling of a shaking hand coerced Peter to a grumpy grumble.

Grumpy? Actually Peter Parker couldn't feel much right now to be too irked. His super-human body was throbbing like no other. Actually, it hurting so bad that this was one of those times a person would be glad to be at least semi-numb. It took a little while, but those ocean blue eyes awoke, finding two familiar faces were right there next to him. You can never forget your friends. These blinding lights couldn't trick this keen hero.

A familiar red-head. And a best friend of a life time.

"Mary Jane… Harry…?"

"Oh my God Pete, you're alright!" Mary Jane was never one to show any restraint, hugging her best friend with all her girl-power might.

"Aaagh!" Peter gasped, his sore bones not feeling any mercy from this cling-age.

"Yo MJ cool it!" Harry gently, or quasi-gently, pulled the red-haired vixen away. A dazed Peter was now more discombobulated than ever.

"S-sorry," MJ whined at her poor friend with a succulent lick of her lips. The kid looked so helpless bandaged. "You scared us half to death Pete!"

"Oi, and you're the one trying to squeeze the life out of me." Peter paused for an instant. "Kind of ironic… don't you think?"

"Shut up!" MJ scowled. "You are in no place to lecture me!"

Peter gave up without even a peep. It wasn't as if this was a battle he could win, even if he was at a hundred percent. The notion to ask what happened set in just in the nick of time. MJ was about to cream him with a good right or left.

"W-what happened to me?"

"You tell us!" MJ snapped again.

"We found you down and out in an alleyway in Time Square." Harry calmed the situation. "You were missing for days… you tell us what happened."

"… Missing?" Peter squinted his eyes, being hit with a train of revelation.

… _Raven?_

"Raven..."

"Raven?" Harry muttered in a mimicking way, his face curling into one of curiosity. "That's the third time you said that."

"Yeah Pete, a bird attacked you or what?" MJ held onto Peter's free hand that wasn't bandaged. The young boy felt his former girl-crush tighten her grip tightly around his hand. At one time Peter remembered that these were the moments he lived for.

He couldn't help but think of something else at the moment. Actually it felt like someone else.

"_You promise you'll come back?"_

"_I promise."_

"I promised." Peter muttered, struggling weakly to get out of the medic bed. This hospital and these injuries weren't a concern.

"Rest tiger," Mary Jane pleaded, holding him down.

_What happened? How come, I can't remember anything...?_

"N-no, I can't," Peter shook his head. "T-this… was she… it… was all a dream?"

"Hey buddy ol' pal." Harry sat down next to him, opposite of MJ. "Calm down, you've had a rough time. Just rest and we'll get you up and running before you know it."

Peter felt so weak. His body was failing him. No super spider strength was coming to help him this time. His eyesight blackened. It blackened to the point of a void as his lids shut down like a curtain to a theater. Away he went to a dream state, letting his weakened self fade into the unconscious.

"_You're coming back... aren't you?"_

"_Aren't you?"_

--

A day later was all it took. It wasn't too long until Spider-Man was swinging through New York City again. Super heroes had no time to properly heal remember? Wolverine's powers of healing were nothing but pipe dreams! Peter couldn't remember what exactly took him out for that week he was out but he knew it had to be some big fight.

But then again behind that fuzzy memory of his laid something great. Faint images of a pleasurable time were what it was. There wasn't another feeling that could match those he felt in his apparent coma. Friends and happiness.

Fun and acceptance!

Love?

Yea, sure that too!

"It felt so real." Spider-Man muttered behind his stitched mask, eyeing this city that he protected no matter how much it shunned him. This felt so wrong.

_Somewhere out there there's a city where you're cheered for doing good. That doesn't sound so strange like it used to._

A grey webline shot through the air and soon the signature scarlet dynamo of the NYC swung across the skyline yet again.It was about late night, 11'o clock to be more exact. New York was still as noisy as ever of course, the chings and pings of nightlife forever strong. Spider-Man swung by a block or two, landing on a side of a broken down building that seemed as peaceful as can be. He crawled with a nimble scurry to get a peak of a sign.

"Pizza…" His stomach grumbled.

_Cyborg made pizzas. Beast Boy shunned me for eating pepperoni. Robin and Starfire were feeding each other. And…_

"I had to make Raven sit next to me at the table." The crimson hero muttered, staring out in the depth of space. It seemed so… empty.

"It had to be real. It had to be!" Spidey clenched his fist only to hear a commotion from afar.

A bank robbery was in progress and this was totally routine as far as Spidey was concerned. With little thought and hesitation he leapt off, soaring towards the scene with every harsh yank of a freshly made webline. The lone hero stared down, meeting up with a foe that he'd seen way too many times.

No faint memories here.

"Shocker," Spidey smirked in his upside down webbing stance. "Shocking to meet you!"

"Nice to see you too pal. Glad to see you've come back!" An energy bolt was released at the instant, only to be dodged quite easily.

"When are you bad guys ever going to learn?" Spider-Man reared back for a punch only to feel all the air from his chest being forced out.

"AAGH!"

"Never pipsqueak!" A pumped up Rhino growled. "You should've stayed away while you could. Now that you decided to come back heres, I'll crush you like a bug!"

"… M-mercy rule!" Spider-Man gasped, feeling the daze come in again.

"I'll finish you off for good now webhead." Shocker's hand was right in his face, fist pumped and ready to send a death jolt through Spider-Man's skull.

Black was all Spider-Man saw. A rich inky black that tore through his eyeballs! Being killed seemed so smooth and painless. In fact, feeling dead seemed so much like being alive.

"I am alive..." Spider-Man found himself lying on the floor. He sat up instantly, curious to what exactly just happened. The two villains were face down, slammed into the ground, and knocked out cold.

This was impossible. Villains just don't fall down and call it quits when they have their worst enemy in their grasps. Someone must have done this. Or was God looking out for him?

_God? Yeah right._

This was no God. This was a someone. And that someone was standing far away, draped in a shadow of the building, the white moonlight casting the frail details. It was a young woman, cloaked in complete white that blinded the eyes. A guardian angel came instantly to mind. An angel he'd seen before as a matter of fact.

"…" Spider-Man walked over, scratching his head as more details come into play. This was the girl. It had to be her.

A pair of sparkling purple eyes.

Smooth gray skin.

That stoic stare.

"R-raven?" Spider-Man blinked, strolling over non-chalantly.

The hooded heroin stared, not wanting to answer. Something compelled her to do so anyway. "You were not supposed to remember my name."

"Not supposed to remember?"

"_You can't come back. It's better off… if we both forget."_

"_W-what?!"_

"_I'm sorry…"_

Raven nodded solemnly, turning away, preparing to leave only to be grabbed onto her shoulder. She felt herself spun around hurriedly and hugged instantly. The girl twitched, rolling her eyes as the happiest teenager in the world was now clung onto her like a vice.

"What happened?" Spider-Man pulled her away an inch just to get an explanation. "Why does it feel like everything that happened... kind of never happened? You! Larry! The Titans! Venom and Carnage!"

"Long story," Raven was hugged again, not even finishing her sentence. She didn't seem too enthusiastic, but then again she was never enthusiastic right?

"I-I don't care," Spidey shook his head. "I remembered we beat Toxin. And…"

"We don't have time." Raven bit her lip, trying to turn away from him.

"W-why did you make me try to forget?" Spider-Man didn't let her turn away. "You know how crazy it's been driving me!"

"Look…"

"It's not cool alright!" Spider-Man scowled. "I already got a ton of stress! And all because of you I thought I was some crazy lunatic that-MMPH!"

Raven expertly muffled him by hugging onto him a bit harder, pressing her face against his cheek. Spidey had a faint minute of disbelief. His memory may have been a bit whacked out but he knew Raven was usually one to be more gentle yet cold. This was more like warm and assertive.

"We have a problem." Raven muttered against him.

Mood killer…

"What problem?" Spider-Man asked.

"The night we beat Toxin and Blood," The sorceress looked away ashamed. "You left after the city waved you off. After we said goodbye…"

"I remember that…" Peter nodded.

"You and I, well, before you left, you were talking crazy."

"Crazy?"

"You didn't want to leave."

Spidey sighed, "W-well I..."

"You actually ended up deciding to go. But you wanted to come back." Raven eyed him warmly. "I wanted to make sure you wouldn't need to come back, nor would you want to."

"W-whyt?" Spidey scowled. "Why would I not want to go back and meet you?!"

"I didn't want you to travel back with Larry." Raven said with a sharp voice. "Who knows what would have happened. You could've been hurt. Or-"

"Aw, you cared that much for me?" Spidey grinned so big that you'd think he was Venom.

"…" Raven twitched.

"Okay… fine." Spider-Man back pedaled. "I understand that I could've died in another trip but... I still remembered you. It was faint but-"

"I don't know how that's possible."

"With love," Spidey gulped the second he said the world. "Anything's possible."

Raven blushed instantly at the word, just letting her being enveloped by his hug. His strong arms were so comforting. Trying to realize that she was hugging a big red arachnid was just a minor concern.

"Ugh, that was too cheesy wasn't it?"

"I messed up." Raven sighed, ignoring him for that split second.

"Nah," Peter nuzzled her head. Taking whiffs of that sweet yet rainy smell. "It's okay. I forgive you for trying to make me forget the girl I want to be with."

"N-no, it's not that." Raven almost grew ashamed, shivering as Spidey sensed it quite easily.

"Then what?"

"… Well," Raven bit her lip. "When you left, I guess I couldn't let you just leave. Or at least… my emotions couldn't."

"Huh? But, I'm here and… wait." Spidey's thoughts came together. "How the heck are you here anyway?"

"Well, you see, when Larry teleported you back… I couldn't help… I mean, sometimes my emotions just-"

Spider-Man sighed. "Raven… what did you do?"

"Like I said…" Raven looked up at her love with a sigh. "We have a problem."

--

_**Justice League Tower**_

"Now what is the meaning of this?" The Martian Man Hunter said, seeing a big gaping hole inside the space tower he called home.

Electrical wires sprayed everywhere, being caused by that big black air-raid vehicle jammed into the hole. This thing was known as the Blackhawk. The jet of choice for the Uncanny X-men.

"What's it to ya bub?" A clawed man by the name of Wolverine scowled.

"I am by no means insulting you sir," The Martian Manhunter was cut-off with a flip of the bird.

"No lookeh here Wolverine," A staff wielding card flipper muttered. "Gambit thinks that we did bust en these guy's here place. It is only propah if we-"

"Shut up canjun." Logan replied.

"Wolverine stand down," Cyclops, countered, eyeing the two. The Justice Leaguers around the jet just shrugged in clueless ness, staring at these new heroes that invaded their space.

"What's going on? Who are you… people?" A dark hero, no, a dark knight demanded.

"And what are you supposed to be?" Wolverine scoffed. "A bat?"

Batman looked down at the fiery canuck, smirking himself with confidence. "And what are you supposed to be? A rat?"

SNIKT.

"Sorry for the mess." Gambit suddenly slid over to a confused Wonder Woman. "Gambit is a gentlemen and will always fix what he messes up moi sher ee…" a kiss to the hand of the Amazonian only made her roll her eyes.

"Hands off my man hussie!" Rogue shoved Wonder Woman away.

"No need for violence young one." Wonder Woman scowled.

As more X-men and Justice Leaguers became acquainted it was clear the arguing had only just started.

--

_**Metropolis**_

"Hagh!" The Man of Steel walloped Doomsday, sending the monster of Armageddon towards a building, shattering the columns that held it up like twigs.

The battle of the century was going on and these two had been going at it for about hours now. The red caped vigilante soared like the bullet he was, attempting to meet his villain head on, only to be smacked like some volleyball to the ground.

"**DIE!"** Those spikes pumped out of Doomsday, the monster ready to crush the Kryptonian to dust.

BOOM!!

That sound was disgusting for sure. But to the joy of Superman, that wasn't the sound of his body being obliterated. It was Doomsday being pancaked, a dog pile if you will, made up of two titanic super humans, one a pale shade of muscular green, and the other an armored tank, crimson like rusted iron.

"Uuurgh…"

"RAARGH!"

"What's going on" Superman stared, the two new heroes who appeared from thin air, turning towards him.

"HULK CRUSH!!"

"Y-you idiot! WHOOOA!!" Juggernaut shouted from up top being tossed at Superman by an enraged Hulk. The giant wall of mass slammed into the Kryptonian only to be stopped in his tracks with a hand.

"Whoa, not bad for a little shrimp." Juggernaut scowled being held easily.

"I don't appreciate new comers shouting and destroying this city." Superman eyed that armored titan in his grasp. "My hospitality only goes so far big fella."

"Okay you underwear wearing puss! Do you know who I am ?!"

"Uh… no."

"Well, I'm the Juggernaut bitch!" The titan suddenly slammed down with all his might, driving Superman through the floor like a nail through wood.

"OH YEAH!"

"RARGH!! HULK ANGRY!" Soon Juggernaut found himself now on the end of a wallop, being tackled to the ground.

The struggle continued, the giants duking it out man style. Doomsday was just curling his head away from afar curiously. Even for him this was strange, but of course he soon too would join the fray. Metropolis wasn't going to look like any metropolis for long that's for sure.

--

**Jump City**

Slade as always was thinking. This cerebral assassin was always a step ahead of the game. He was alive. A man who ran through hell tricked the Devil and God himself to be alive. There wasn't much more a mere mortal can do.

"The world is so boring when you're that damn good." Slade smirked, feeling his re-made iron mask.

"Good?" A chilly voice hissed, that even made Slade turn his head. "I would hardly call a resurrection that epitome of human perfection Mr. Slade."

"Oh really?" The one-eyed warrior glared into the depth of his own cave hideout. The details of a sinister man that rivaled him glowered at him from the doorway.

"What would you suggest then stranger?" Slade closed his one eye as if he was unimpressed. "Or better yet, suggest to me why I don't destroy you right on the spot?"

"I was told you had a smart mouth." The accent began to shine through, a few steps of metal clanging against the rocks below. "It appears Mr. Slade that you and I have a lot in common."

"Is that so? Well, I am sure the new fad is metallic armor but honestly…"

A green cape littered the dark air, a mask as menacing as the one Slade wore now totally in view. It was cold steel, with evil eyes behind them. An evil soul that was just as twisted as Deathstroke was.

"We are cut of the same iron mold…" The villain chuckled.

"Does this bravado have a name?" Slade returned with enthusiasm.

"The name is Doom… Mr. Slade." Those eyes began to glow amber. "Doctor Doom…"

A group of villains from both worlds began to show up on all sides. Sinister, The Joker, Kingpin, and Lex Luthor for starters…

"My… aren't we one big happy family?" Slade's good eye glared.

An alliance was forming… and this one was no good.

--

**New York City**

"Our two worlds are now… one?" Spider-Man mumbled, noticing Ghost Rider flying down the street against a chuckling Flash.

"Come on dead man!" Flash chuckled. "Catch up!"

The Rider only laughed back, his head lighting up the sky. "See you in Hell kid…"

Spider-Man blinked, seeing the both of them blaze up the streets of New York. Raven nodded, pulling his head close to her. She sighed.

"Apparently my powers, and Larry, caused a dimensional riff…"

"Apparently." Spider-Man stared at her, looking with a big smirk soon after. "Well… I guess this isn't too bad… I mean, I get to hold you like this forever."

"… True." Raven hugged on him, the two lovebirds clinging on.

The love would not last for long though, as suddenly the sky began to become a dark lightning filled night. Crimson streaks of blood and evil laughter filled the air, a portal forming in the middle of the city. Three beings came from the top staring down. All of them were as menacing as Trigon himself.

One male was dressed in light blue and gold, purple skin with red eyes, dressed like a king of the most screwed up warrior race in the world. The other male was dressed in deep azure armor, gray skin with red eyes that matched his counterpart, being just as muscled and inhumanely chiseled as his brethren of destruction.

The middle stood a dark hooded woman, eyes glowing as bright as the sun.

"Okay boys," The scythe wielding goddess smirked. "This is where our war will begin… the greatest heroes and villains will fight for my pleasure."

"As you wish my lovely Death!" Thanos rumbled, filling his hands with energy.

"This world will be destroyed swiftly..." Darkseid added his death ray from his eyes ready to lay waste to the world. "The anti-equation to life will be mine!"

"Oooh Galactus…" Death looked to the air.

A loud bellow could be heard from away from the earth, a being that dwarfed the entire planet itself coming into view. The purple and blue leviathan was floating in air, the planet destroyer himself glaring down the planet.

_I can't believe this!_

One minute you're hugging. The next day it's Doom's Day! Spider-Man and Raven just gave each other one of those depressed looks. Those really really really depressed exhausted looks that married couples of many years would give one another. This was not going to be one of those happily ever afters…. Well at least not just yet!

"Ugh, who's fault is this!" Spider-Man whined.

"…" Raven growled at him.

"Um I mean," Spidey thought, looking to the air to release his anger. Saying one word that Raven even caught on before it was said.

"LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRY!"

--

**Larry's Place**

The Robin fanatic of nightmares was dumbfounded, popcorn falling out of his mouth. Those masked eyes just stared at the screen seeing the end of the world unfold. His Teen Titan show had become a cross-over bonanza of destructive magnitudes. Was the little hero going to save the world yet again?

Was he going to save Robin his hero and the rest of the gang?

Is the world going to be destroyed?

Was Larry ready to fix this?

"Um… Larry should stop watching TV for a bit."

(CLICK!)

… **THE END?**

**--**

**A/N: **And here the story ends… but there is some bonus stuff… read on. Thanks for reading everyone! I knew it took way too long but… at least it's finished! See you when Spidey 3 is released!

--

**Bonus Epilogue**

"Are you sure we should be doing this?"

"Of course, I always wanted to have my aunt meet you."

It was such a nice night, a perfect night for these two love-birds to make a little date walk to the suburb located Parker house. A civilian dressed Raven and Peter Parker were clinging hand on hand. It wasn't a sight or feeling Raven was used to yet, but it was growing on her.

Ice queens are fixable too.

"I'm nervous." Raven whispered, her purple sweater rustling up next to her man's jacket.

"There's nothing to be worried about." Peter smiled reassuringly. "Robin said you're not needed tonight, and I'm free. So-"

"What if your aunt doesn't like me?"

"Pish tosh!" Peter shook his head. "My aunt will love you! I promise."

"You promise…"

"I promise."

DING DONG!

The door opened!

"My lord, Peter!" The old woman yelled, her arms wrapping around her nephew with a loving vengeance. Peter grimaced and smiled as he hugged back.

"H-hey Aunt May."

"Oh you've been gone for too long!"

"Aunt May… I was just here four hours ago…"

"Four hours too long dear!" The older woman replied joyfully, turning to the gray skinned girl who tried to fade into the background as always. "Now who is this nice young lady?"

"Um… yea," Peter pulled Raven into the forefront. "This is the girl I was talking to you about Aunt May. Her name is Raven."

"I-I can introduce myself…" Raven muttered half-annoyed. "Nice to meet you Mrs. Parker."

"Oooh deary, nice to meet you too dear! Peter talks about you all the time! We must get to know each other!" At an instant Raven was being pulled into the Parker house. She turned with a semi-worried look at Peter, only to be replied with a big goofy two thumbs up.

"We'll be fine." Peter smiled.

_I hope to God we'll be fine…_

--

**5 minutes later…**

The tea cups were steaming, and the cookies were on the table. Aunt May was talking away while Peter just smiled his stupid smile. Raven was about as comfortable as an elephant on a bicycle with training wheels sitting and listening. The purple haired sorceress literally just blinked her way through the night as the rapid fire of conversation came at her with a relentless pace.

"You see Peter was always so studious. Even when he was young we could tell he was going to be a genius!"

"Yeah, genius huh?" Raven shot the kid with the spider powers a funny look.

"H-hey… now Aunt May, I think genius is a strong word." He raised his hands in defiance.

"It's okay Peter. You are a genius!" His aunt shoved his hand away gently. "Would you like to see some pictures Raven? Some baby pictures?"

"… Uh… sure?" Raven answered dumbly.

"Baby pictures!" Peter gasped with the fury of a storm. "Aunt May! No way!"

"Don't be shy Peter, we're all grown ups now."

"B-b-but-" Mr. Parker only looked with puppy eyes at Raven. The reply he got was one that was totally expected.

"Let's see those pictures Mrs. Parker."

_Just to spite me woman!_

"…"

"Oh you'd be delighted Raven! Peter was the cutest little baby in the world!"

"Oh I am sure Mrs. Parker." Raven was loving it.

DING DONG!

"Ugh, I'll go get the door." Peter used this opportunity to walk off some steam, eyeing Raven with tough eyes… or at least as tough as he could towards a girl that could throttle him no problem of course.

The door opens.

"Hey Tiger!"

_Oh… boy…_

"MJ… I uh…"

"I just came by to-" The red-head suddenly blinked seeing Raven over by the couch, her eye twitching right away.

"Um…" Peter muted.

"That girl again?"

"Um…" Peter was still muted.

"Mary Jane! Have you met Peter's new girlfriend?" Aunt May smiled. "She is so lovely! You two must meet!"

"Yes, the girlfriend." Mary Jane said bitterly.

"Um…" Peter was muter than before.

"Oh no…" Raven sighed.

"GIRLFRIEND?!" MJ's eyes turned fire.

"Um…" Mute was now Peter Parker's real name.

"Look I don't want any trouble." Raven stood up. "I'll just be going now."

"N-no stay," Mary Jane hmphed, pulling Peter to the living room. "I think we should all get to know each other better right Peter?"

"Um…" Mute!

Raven only shrugged, sitting down just as perturbed. MJ forced Peter to sit between Raven and herself, the couch being quite squishy now. Aunt May of course was as clueless as ever, smiling at the two young women that sat beside a bullet sweating Peter Parker. The two cross-armed girls just looked at one another with the most negative of thoughts.

"I am sure you two have met?" Aunt May grinned.

"Somewhat…" Both girls answered in unison.

Silence.

"…" Peter looked at both, and just shrugged. "So who's up for some pie?"

"Shut up." Both girls answered again in unison.

"Egh guess not…" Peter sighed towards the sky. "My life is good… my life is good."

"Shut up."

"Okay…"

--

**Speedway Bus line, heading towards NYC**

"Aaah!" A fully recuperated magician sat comfortably in the front of the bus, this former villain just finishing off his major rehab. Broken bones are not easy to heal my friends.

The great Mumbo Jumbo was now retired, heading towards Broadway to start his own magical Broadway act! Things seemed so good for our favorite blue magician, and of course we all know what happened to him. But little did he know there were a certain two people, he didn't want to see at the moment.

"If Spider-Man had a movie, the people voted you 70 percent as the villain that should be in it! Hah!"

"What's so funny about that?"

"Well… I'm way cooler."

"Not according to the polls apparently."

"Er… shut up pops! What do people know? Anyway that Gotham City is one nice place isn't it?"

"Yep."

"You know what was even nicer?"

"What?"

"Working for the Joker! That was awesome."

"Yep."

Mumbo Jumbo began to look funny at the conversation happening behind him, those familiar voices making him a bit uneasy. His eyes peeled off his newspaper. "It's okay Mumbo… it's all psychological." This was supposed to happen after all. They said he would have some trauma, but this was silly. This was just his head messing with him… no matter how real it sounded.

"You know what was even nicer?"

"… What?"

"Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy!"

"Yes definitely."

"You know, I loved it after I murdered that guy and HQ gave me a kiss on the cheek! She was like "OH YOU'RE CUTAH THAT MISTAH JAY"!

"We know. We know."

"You know, Poison Ivy as all over you, and you still stayed loyal! It's going to be fun seeing the old gang again. Fearsome Five ya know! Gizmo, Mammoth… Jinxy."

"Jinx's been leaving us messages like nuts."

"Yea, I read your cellphone messages. OH EDDIE I LOVE YOU! OH I LOVE YOU TOO JINX!"

"Shut up."

"Hahahaha…"

_Oh no…_ Mumbo knew his mind was playing tricks on him. These were the guys. These were the monsters that nearly fractured his spine till death. These were the guys!

"Well lookie here Venom," Cassidy looked over his bus seat, seeing the certain blue magician. "Out of all the busses in the world, you had to walk into mind!"

"Hey, how's it going?" Eddie Brock patted the nervous wreck's shoulder. "Smurph geezer right?"

"I… I… I… I…"

"There's nothing to be afraid of old buddy." Cassidy began to wrap his red suit around him, an axe forming as the symbiotes showed their true colors. "This will be one fun bus ride… right Venom?"

"Right Carnage. Right."

Mumbo Jumbo was now hysterical.

"**NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"**


End file.
